Orange theory workout tomorrow
BingeWatchingJunkies
2018.08.10 03:08 BingeWatcherBot BingeWatchingJunkies
A community dedicated to marathon Binge-Watching TV Shows together. A new place to have discussions about a TV series you may have missed all the original Hype for and to simply enjoy Binge-Watching it together. Anyone is welcome to submit links about TV Shows, post a Trailer, or start a thread with anything TV or Binge-Watching related. How It Works: Please submit a Series title in the Voting thread or just Vote on the series nominated that you'd most like to binge!
2023.06.09 16:12 Michael_AN_Creech The Chronicles of Marcus Hellyrr - Prologue
I'd like to start by letting everyone know that the genre is Fantasy Epic, and that this is a long prologue at 6,414 words. This prologue serves a purpose as it takes care of a lot of my setting and plot setup. It also gives the reader a fair bit of worldbuilding without making it too much of an info dump (talking to you Robert Jordan ;P).
I've had several people beta read this for me and gotten a lot of positive feedback. The prolbem for me is that these were all people I know very well on a personal level. Several have made comparisons to Chronicles of Narnia or Lord of the Rings as far as how well the full book is written. The problem is, friends and family can often have a bias and make things seem better than they really are. So, now I want to do a test run in the real world and see what people who don't know me think. Is it as engaging and compelling as they have made me hope that it is?
I'm basically wanting to take a page from a couple authors I admire and follow the ABC rule for critiquing. Please let me know of any point where you thought it was Awesome, Boring or Confusing. I know prologues aren't everyone's favorite thing, but this has basically been written like a novella for the main story as it foreshadows a lot of things leading all the way into book four.
————————————————————————————
PROLOGUE
ARCHIVE INFINITUM
October 14, 844 (Alt-Future)
"Welcome back to the Archive, Master Jonathan."
"Thank you, Charles. It's good to be back. Have you noticed anything interesting in the Physical Realm?"
"I have not, sir. Do you require any assistance today?"
"Thank you, but no. I'm only here to revisit a passage within the history of the Order. Shortly after, I'll depart for the reunion at the Tower."
"Excellent, sir. I'll leave you to it."
Jonathan emerged from the ether and walked through the Archive doors. Inhaling deeply, he breathed in the familiar scents of dusty cleanliness that can only truly be found in a place of learning. The lights reflected off the floor's white marble surface, casting a glow that evenly lit every corner of the large chamber. Even so, the room still felt cavernous to him, as if he were a galleon amidst the vastness of the ocean.
Jonathan appeared to be in his early to mid forties. Though, with the way he carried himself and the spring in his step, he seemed closer to his late twenties. His hair was shoulder length and dark gray. He wore bifocals though he hadn't needed them since his ascension, and dressed with a refined sense of style.
His gray eyes were by far his most interesting feature, though. They were the only hint of how old he truly was and the many adventures and travesties he'd witnessed. Regardless, how old he was didn't matter as age had long since lost its meaning for him. After all, being an immortal tended to give a man new priorities in life.
As he strolled across the room, a lift descended from the tower's heights. The square platform had waist high rails around its perimeter. It floated through the air showing no sign of a suspension system to raise or lower it. This was accomplished by a magical enchantment that allowed it to levitate and dart about the room at mind numbing speeds. As he stepped up onto the platform's dais, it landed on the floor in front of him. He took a position at its center, then, after folding his arms behind his back, mentally willed it to take him to floor eight hundred forty four.
It rose off the ground, gradually gaining speed until it was a hundred or so feet in the air. At that point, the platform took off like a rocket. The thought of what these speeds would do to him if this were outside the Realm of Intellect crossed his mind, making him chuckle nervously. He knew he had to be moving close to six hundred miles per hour.
Now, let me tell you a bit about Jonathan's pet project, The Archive Infinitum. The Archive is a magical structure he'd designed shortly after the cataclysm that nearly wiped out the human race. An event most of you now refer to as the Night of Burning Skies. That same event is also what gave us the powers we now refer to as magic.
Shortly after obtaining his ascension, he learned that science's multiverse theories were close to how reality really worked. There are an infinite number of parallel universes, or branching timelines, that coexist simultaneously. What was different is that each universe shared a common six realm structure. The Physical Realm, the Realm of Intellect, the Dominion of Shadows, the Plane of Enlightenment, the Land of the Forgotten, and the Ether.
He built the Archive within the Realm of Intellect so it wouldn't be bound by the laws of physics or time as we know them. Once the structure was anchored in place, he could set most of those parameters himself. What he didn't realize was that making it here would have an unintended, though not unwelcome, side effect. The structure's size, shape, and architectural style could change by anyone who entered it.
When someone enters the Archive, it ascertains their strength of mind and will. Suppose the individual's mental fortitude is deemed stronger than that of the other occupants. In that case, the appearance will adjust to one that best serves and appeals to that individual. This could become unsettling for the occupants already inside the first few times it happened. That being said, it has no effect on the contents atop the shelves or where you're located within the structure. For Jonathan, it shared an uncanny resemblance to the George Peabody Library, though on a much grander scale.
The lift stopped after a brief ride, and Jonathan stepped off. He resumed his stride, passing row after row of the cherry wood bookcases. There were hundreds of rows and thousands of tomes and scrolls in each. As a scholar, he'd spent most of his existence here. But, even so, he knew there would always be something more to be gleaned from their pages.
Today was a day of remembrance. Of celebration. Of mourning. It was the anniversary of the end of a war that had lasted ten thousand years. With the death of one individual, a light of hope was given to many. For others, it was a bittersweet victory that left a void in their hearts. He'd come here today to revisit a passage that would return him to that fateful day. Reliving the event which granted them this peace, and once again, paying his respects to a dear friend.
"Ah, yes, yes, yes. Here we go."
The plaque on the side of the bookcase read, Row DD, Column 15. Now that he'd found the right one, he began scanning the shelves. It wasn't long before his hand landed on the tome he sought.
"Here it is." He pulled it down from the shelf. "My word. Has it truly been fifteen hundred years since I glanced through these pages?"
Looking at the cover, he chuckled. The combined magic of the Archive and the Realm had created a thin layer of dust. Giving it the feeling of something ancient and lost to time. Raising it to his lips, he blew the dust away, causing the magic to dissipate as it fell to the floor. He pulled open the cover and rifled through the pages. The section he stopped at contained the account of Rexinon the Prophet's final words.
Summoning his divine magics, he channeled a spell into the tome. The words that once filled the passages began to fade away, leaving only the blank pages, which now bled a blueish gray smoke. The soft glow of the lights against the floor diminished as the smoke spread. As the darkness grew more substantial, luminescent spheres and arcs of brilliant blues and crimson could be seen dancing about its surface like lightning.
The ground trembled beneath his feet, and the smokey haze took on a more stormlike appearance. All around him, the air started to feel heavy, and the taste of dust and sea salt filled his mouth. A gentle rain began to fall, and the room's remaining lights winked out. If not for the increasing flashes of lightning, he would've been left in total darkness. But even this was not a comfort, as those flashes cast shadows against the storm's ever swirling walls. Many of which appeared to be dark things that should never be seen in the light.
The storm's intensity grew, bringing disorienting cracks of thunder and wind whipping around him. It assaulted his senses and seemed to have an almost vengeful purpose. That meant he had to constantly focus on the spell, bracing himself against the onslaught. If he failed, it would kill him without question.
Some of the shadows began to take on a physical form with details beyond what the walls could offer them. He watched as an hourglass tumbled end over end, circling him before it returned to the storm. A moment later, a blazing fireplace and mantle emerged but produced neither light nor heat. Finally, a door engraved with the crest of the Order appeared. These images were ones he'd expected to see for this particular passage, and so came as no surprise. However, when a fourth image appeared, he was caught off guard.
Although it was normal for three images to accompany this spell, an occasional fourth spoke of prophecy. He focused intently on this final image. It showed twelve people standing in a circle; one of them was coated in blood. Two others were bound by chains. One a man, the other a woman.
He looked closer at the man and realized it was Godric. His eyes opened wide as he tried to decipher the meaning behind the image. Only a few moments passed while he speculated, but it was a few moments too many. Disaster struck, and too late, he realized his mistake. He'd lost focus, and now the storm would surely take him.
Hurricane force winds and debris tore at his clothes, quickly turning them into rags. One powerful gust slammed into his side as if he'd been struck by a car, knocking him off his feet. The storm swelled with even greater ferocity. It threatened to consume him this time, and he wondered if it would finally cost him.
Rain and hail pelted his face and body, while dust and sand stung his eyes. As he wiped away the grit, a bolt of lightning struck before him, temporarily blinding him. He got to his hands and knees, gasping for breath as the storm continued to beat him relentlessly.
Steeling himself against the pain, he rose to his feet. As fast as he could manage, he began casting mental defenses and barriers to protect his mind from the horrific assault. He bellowed in defiance of the storm, "I will not let it end this way! I refuse!" One defense after another was laid upon his person, until finally, he succeeded. The winds died to a breeze as the rain became little more than a summer misting.
He heard the sound of a quill scratching against paper over the storm's remnants, and the air behind his back grew hot as a crackling fire joined the room's ambiance. The sickly sweet smell of incense filled his nostrils, reminding him of days spent in his master's study. Another fond memory.
The storm wall vanished as the tremors subsided, making the room visible through a misty haze. The light of the fireplace cast his shadow across the now rough cut gray stone floor. Half a dozen tapestries hung around the room, and a liquor cabinet stood at the room's far corner. The main entry door remained closed to his left, and the doorway to the study's balcony lay to his right. At the room's center sat Rexinon at his desk, writing furiously on a piece of parchment.
Wiping the sweat from his brow, he breathed a sigh of relief. Although he'd done this countless times, the journey into the pages of history was always filled with peril. But, blessedly, the most intense part of the spell was complete. And while he could now relax in that fact, that fourth image still concerned him.
He stood in the familiar square room, clothing restored to its original state. The evening's air flowed through the open windows, making the ambient temperature quite cozy. Crossing the room, he paused at the desk and listened as Rexinon started muttering. "What I wouldn't give for a typewriter, much less a computer. Would make this so much faster."
Jonathan couldn't help but crack a smile. "Oh, but how many times have I thought the same thing, old friend?" He remarked, though he knew Rexinon couldn't hear him.
He stepped up to the desk and leaned over it. Looking down at the paper Rexinon was writing on, he frowned. Like so many times before, it appeared as little more than black scribbles on a page. Those words had to be important, but there was no way to know.
This was one of the spell's critical weaknesses. The details within the vision were only as precise as what was written in the tome. Most of the books in the Archive were magically transcribed. The benefits of this were completed histories free of victor and writer biases. Although, it wasn't flawless.
Throughout history, there have been individuals or events that the spell couldn't see. The most well known examples of these blips in time were the United States presidency of Franklin D. Roosevelt from 1933 to 1945 and the United Kingdom's Prime Minister, Michael Durham, from 2063 to 2065. All that is known about them was their lives before office and the accounts written by those around them. These gaps in history were generally the result of one of two things. In these two cases, a place or individual with a strong connection to the Dominion of Shadows.
Sighing, he pushed off the desk and crossed the room to the liquor cabinet. He opened the glass doors, pulling several bottles and a glass from the shelves. He made a drink consisting of three parts Red Adders Bite and one part Dry Amorian Blood Wine, then added a lime wedge to the rim of the glass. The others wouldn't arrive for another half hour, leaving him time to kill.
He walked around the room with his drink in hand and studied the various tapestries, several of which he'd been a part of. Each one depicted an accomplishment or tragedy facilitated by the Order. All save one, which showed a scene from the event that started it all.
The one to the left of the cabinet showed the Order's founding. In the background stood a grand tower of black and white marble. Its four sides were engraved with the Mark of Hellyrr, which glowed with a magical light. In front of it stood a man facing a gathered crowd, his arms swept wide in triumph. They looked up at him and the structure with reverence and awe.
He continued to move in a counterclockwise manner around the room. Above the main entry door hung another tapestry. One he was even depicted in. It showed the aftermath of a massacre. Six figures stood amidst the bodies of hundreds. The earth around them was scorched by flame, and the blood of the fallen had stained it red. The cloud covered sky glowed a deep crimson with gold outlines from the fires below. It had come to be known as the Cleansing of Elysian, in which the entirety of the planet's second continent had been annihilated to preserve the world.
"I wish it had never come to this. Why can't we all just get along? Instead of thriving in the prosperity of our two lands, they plotted and began planning to bring war to our own people. To rape, pillage, and enslave them. Even with all my vast knowledge and wisdom, I can't understand why they felt the need to dominate and control the world." He looked back up at the tapestry. "Even now, most of the land is still uninhabitable."
He turned around and looked at the tapestry above the balcony door. This one would appear out of place with the others to all but a few handfuls of people. Even for those who learned the truth behind it, it looked like little more than an artist's vision of what a beautiful landscape at sunset should look like. The sky is dotted with hundreds of stars as shades of red, orange, and yellow dance across the land's horizon. The artist's point of view appears to be looking down from a hillside. Down the hill's slope, you can see a pond teaming with wildlife along its edge. The remaining landscape is filled with miles of forest stretching toward the horizon.
For the few who survived this event and still remained, they knew it depicted the final moments of their world before all of humanity was nearly lost.
Jonathan fixated on this tapestry more than he had on the others. The longer he stared, the more distant his expression grew. Over time, his breathing quickened, and his grip on the glass slipped. It shattered as it hit the floor, causing the rug to stain from the liquid. The sound jerked him out of the trance like state, making him feel ill.
He could still recall the memory of that long ago day like it were yesterday. The thought of how close humanity had come to extinction made his legs weak, and he stumbled back against the wall behind him. He slid down the stones' cool surface and noticed his hands were now trembling. Through shuddering breaths, he uttered the words of a broken man. "So much death. So many lives were lost that day. So many. Oh, Sonia. Even after all this time, I still miss you."
The main entry door slammed open, crashing against the wall with a loud bang. Jonathan jerked as one of them collided mere inches from where he sat. The startling sound had been enough to pull him from his stupor, but it still took a moment for him to gather himself. A man in the doorway lowered his foot from where he'd obviously kicked the unlocked door in.
"Knock, knock, Rex. Seems you've done it now."
"Seth. I'll never understand the animosity you held for Rexinon," Jonathan said wearily as he got to his feet.
Seth stood just shy of five foot eight inches and had slick black hair that he kept combed back. He wore black jeans and a beige dress shirt with mother of pearl buttons, which had seen far too much polish in recent days. A malevolent grin displayed his perfect teeth and careless eyes. He strode into the room, dragging a chair behind him, and placed it on the rug by the fireplace.
"Was kicking the door in really necessary, Seth?"
A second man stepped into the room, obviously annoyed by the unnecessary use of force. He wore a navy blue business suit and towered over everyone else in the room, and that was saying something considering Jonathan was six foot. As he still held to the standards of a marine, he kept his hair high and tight and his face clean shaven. He stood at the rug's edge out of respect for the Order so as not to mar the embroidered Mark of Hellyrr. A respect Seth clearly lacked.
"Godric Gibbs. This day changed you. Hell, it changed all of us, but few as much as you," Jonathan said. He looked back at the door as the third and final man entered. "Assassin."
This man was of a height with Jonathan and wore all black from head to toe. His outfit looked like something out of a TV show. Almost like a cross between Gi Joe's Snake Eyes, and CW Arrow's League of Assassins. After ten thousand years, all they knew about him was his previous occupation as a contract killer. It wasn't long before they'd taken to calling him Assassin, as they had no other name to go by. Any time he was asked a question regarding his past, he either remained silent or dodged it outright. He took a position to Godric's left and, like Godric, took care of where he stood on the rug.
The three men stood in silence and watched as Rexinon continued to write. Godric and Assassin seemed content to wait until he addressed them. On the other hand, Seth seemed to grow more agitated as the minutes passed. Jonathan chuckled in spite of himself.
About twenty minutes later, Rexinon spoke, "Reverend Seth Jones, Colonel Godric Gibbs, and Assassin. To what do I owe the pleasure?" His tone plainly indicated that he already knew.
Seth spoke first. "Oh, cut the crap, Rex. You already know why we're here. This cult thing of yours has gone on long enough."
"Well, there's the pot calling the kettle black," Jonathan muttered sarcastically.
Godric rolled his eyes. Everyone in the room knew about Seth's past as a cult leader. They also knew his anger was more at being forced to wait in silence than anything to do with Rexinon or the Order.
"Calm yourself, Seth. There's no need for such hostilities." Godric looked at Rexinon apologetically. "I'm sorry to have to do this, old friend, but my hands are tied. Rexinon the Prophet, Headmaster of the Hellyrrian Order, you've been charged with conspiracy to overthrow the governments of Aurelia and seize control for the Order.
"As we speak, the leaders of the Hellyrrian Order are being gathered for execution. Furthermore, your towers and all their artifacts will be destroyed, and any remnants of the Order's existence is to be wiped from the face of history. As of 0813 this morning, you have been sentenced to death. How do you plead?"
Rexinon continued to write at an incredible rate. He knew why they'd come. He'd known this was coming for months. After all, his gift was the gift of prophecy. The evidence for the charges against him was both substantial and ethereal, depending on what light was shown on it.
Two centuries ago, the Order had tracked the activities of an unknown number of individuals who'd been subtly manipulating several of the Aurelian governing bodies. They'd spread like a poison, corrupting them and turning once prosperous kingdoms which knew few hardships, into lands where the people had to fight just to survive. The problem was that whoever that force had been, always seemed to be just one step ahead of them. Now, not only was it check, but checkmate. The Order had lost.
"I believe the Righteous Twelve to be ill advised. I believe you've been manipulated by the same corrupted governing body which we've spent so long trying to purify—." Seth grunted. "—But," he said at length, "I accept all charges against me, save one. Neither myself nor anyone else of the Order has ever sought to rule Aurelia, as the charges would imply. The Cleansing of Elysian should've been proof enough to show that to be true."
Rexinon penned the final words of his letter and placed the pen back in its stand. Pulling the top off a jar, he dusted the page with a thin layer of sand to soak up any excess ink. After dumping the sand back into another jar to be cleaned, he pushed away from his desk and stood to look at his guests for the first time. After nudging his stool back under, he addressed Godric directly.
"Will you join me on the balcony one last time?"
Godric nodded his head and gestured towards the balcony doorway. As they stepped outside, Jonathan followed.
Rexinon leaned against the railing and looked out over the city, his gaze fixed on the setting sun. Godric joined him and looked down to the tower's base, some five hundred feet below. Although he was not afraid of heights, it gave him respect for the sturdily mounted railing at the balcony's edge.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Rexinon said. Godric looked at him, confused. "The way the world has turned out since that day? Ten thousand years of watching as civilization was rebuilt and destroyed time and time again by a senseless war. Watching them evolve into something more as they learned how to use these gifts we were given. In some ways, we're greater than we ever were. In other ways, we're inferior. If I have any regrets, it's that I couldn't do more to leave the people better prepared for this new age."
"Well spoken. If it's any consolation, I believe this is wrong. I even spoke out against the council for a different outcome. For my efforts, though, I was threatened with execution if I didn't cease my objections."
Rexinon's tone grew heated after hearing of the council's reaction. "You should know better than anyone why I fought so hard against them, then. I'm not against governance. I'm against corrupt governance. We had far too many corrupt politicians and warlords in our own time for me to ever want to allow it again."
Godric nodded his head. "Yes. The problem is you played too heavy a hand too quickly. Instead of accepting that they'd been beaten, they cheated by playing with an ace they had hidden up their collective sleeves."
Rexinon sighed, knowing his words were true. "Indeed. I've accepted my fate. I won't run. Won't even make it difficult for y'all. I have no need to. I would like to make one final request to ease your conscience, though."
Rexinon leaned toward Godric conspiratorially. As he did this, the world around them began to shimmer and distort. Almost like the motion blurring you'd see on a TV. Likewise, their conversation was masked by the sound of white noise and the sound of hushed incoherent whispers.
This was the second hurdle the scrying spells had to deal with. Individuals with divine magic could conceal their conversations or even the events they were a part of. Rexinon had concealed this conversation, and to this day, Godric has never spoken of what was said.
Jonathan returned to the study with a resigned sigh. There was nothing more he could learn from their conversation. Assassin stood in the same spot he'd been when he first entered the room and looked as if he hadn't so much as twitched. Seth, however, was rummaging through the desk's drawers. He'd tried to figure out what he was looking for in the past, but nothing seemed obvious.
The shards of glass from when he'd dropped his cup earlier had vanished, along with the stain on the rug from the liquor. As expected, the glass had returned to the cabinet, and the bottles had refilled to where they were before he'd arrived. This was yet another reminder that this was a magically induced vision of an event that had long since passed. It could be too easy to forget that this wasn't real and that if he spent too much time here, it would have consequences in the real world for him.
He knew they'd be out there a while. In previous visits, he'd occasionally spent this time combing through the room, similar to what Seth was doing. Having cataloged everything centuries ago, there was nothing left to do but wait. So, he walked around the desk and sat squarely within the Mark of Hellyrr embroidered on the rug. There, for the next hour or so, he would remain, arms folded, legs crossed, and eyes shut. Freeing his mind of all unnecessary thoughts and emotions. At least, that was the plan.
About forty minutes in, Seth started to grumble and complain, forcing Jonathan to give up on his meditation. "… I know he's one of the humblest among our kind, but lord, does he have to be so dull? I can't find anything interesting anywhere. Even his liquor cabinet is dull." Seth walked from behind the desk to the liquor cabinet, pulled a few bottles out at random, and read the labels aloud. "Red Adders Bite, Amorian Blood Wine. Christ, he's even got Athester's Sweet Malt. This crap might as well be water." He pulled another bottle down and said, "At least he's got the taste to have at least one bottle of Nordic Berserker."
"Some of us prefer the simpler things in life. You might find life more enjoyable when you aren't always looking for the rare and exotic," Assassin said with a disinterested, almost dismissive tone.
Seth clicked his tongue. "Hell, even this letter he was so focused on when we arrived makes no sense." Seth thrust the letter towards Assassin, who took it nonchalantly. "Look at this."
Jonathan studied Assassin intently, hoping for any sign that would reveal the letter's contents. It was no use, though; for all the emotion he showed, Jonathan would've thought it no more important than a grocery list. But, if that were the case, why obscure it from the eyes of the scrying spell? The frustration caused by such a simple sheet of paper was baffling.
Jonathan got to his feet as Rexinon and Godric returned. As Rexinon walked to stand at the center of the rug, Jonathan moved behind the desk. Godric walked toward Assassin and conversed with him for a few minutes. Once again, the sound of white noise shrouded what was said. This time, it was Godric who masked his words from the spell. When Assassin nodded, Godric moved beside him and faced Rexinon.
Rexinon looked at each tapestry and seemed to relive each as he did so. They all knew those accomplishments and tragedies would stand the test of time. Any efforts to change that would fall flat. The Order had played too significant a role in shaping this new world. Finally, he turned to Godric, kneeling as he met his regret filled eyes.
Assassin pulled an infamous rod from his side, dubbed the Executioner's Handle. Forged in the Dominion of Shadow by Assassin some three thousand years ago. It was one and a half feet long of shadow infused steel and bound with his own divine essence. Ominous black tendrils crawled along Assassin's hand like something alive and flowed into the handle. The shaft elongated, and an axe head formed at its end.
Though he had accepted his fate, seeing that axe form made Rexinon's heart stop momentarily. He looked at Godric questioningly. Godric knew what that look meant and nodded his head in assent. Agreeing to this had allowed them both to right several wrongs this night by asking one simple question. "Do you have any final words or requests?"
"I have two, if you'll grant them. The first, allow me to disband the Order formally as my final act as headmaster."
Seth started to protest, but Assassin lowered the axehead in his direction as a silent threat. Seth glared at Assassin with seething hatred. Godric nodded to Rexinon. "Proceed."
As the headmaster of the Hellyrrian Order, he had a mental connection with every member. Without hesitation, Rexinon's eyes began to glow with a brilliant purple hue. This would be Rexinon's final order, and Godric knew it would save thousands.
"My brothers and sisters, hear me now and heed my words. Abandon the Order and save yourselves. Flee to the hills and never look back to what we once were. With my dying breath, the Hellyrrian Order is no more. The governments of Aurelia have played a hand we can't stand against. Anyone who disregards this command will be hunted down and executed without mercy. To the leaders and guild masters of the Order, I charge you with dismantling everything relating to the Order and turning over every artifact and document you can to Godric the Just, Jonathan the Wise, or Assassin the Watcher. I also ask that you help calm those who feel outraged and betrayed by this night. Do not blame the Twelve, as they were little more than pawns in this corrupt game of politics. Farewell, my friends. My family. May the peace we have fought for be found in the coming days."
The glow faded, and he slumped forward onto his hands, his breathing labored. A few moments passed, and he managed to catch his breath but still looked towards the ground.
"The second request I have is that anyone who would heed that warning be spared. The ruling factions wanted me. As long as no one else causes trouble, we know they won't cause too much fuss over it."
His voice took on a much sharper edge as he looked back up. "You call us a cult, though you know we are nothing of the sort. On the contrary, our Order has stood for nearly five thousand years for the betterment of the entire world. How they treated you should tell you that what I said and what we were doing was justified."
"Shut your mouth, Rex!" Seth spat venomously.
Godric glared at Seth. His own anger with this situation was at the point of breaking free. "Be silent! I don't know what kind of grudge you have, but I, for one, don't give a damn what the council said. Rexinon doesn't deserve death for the crimes he's being accused of. Unfortunately, the ruling factions in almost every nation are corrupted and working towards being as corrupt as they were back in our day." Godric sighed. "Regrettably, my hands are tied, though. The law is the law, and I have been overruled on this matter. Regardless of what my conscience thinks, I will abide by the rules of the land."
Rexinon nodded, understanding Godric's situation perfectly. Godric had become the divine embodiment of law and justice at his ascension. While those two things work hand in hand, they are far from the same, and one must often walk a fine line to serve them both. In this case, the choices were clear. In the end, it didn't matter what he chose; he would inevitably betray one virtue or the other. Unfortunately, there was no good way for him to handle this, and Rexinon could see how this was affecting him.
"The majority of the Order will heed my warning. As for the leaders, if any are still alive, they will follow that command to the letter. They'll even aid you in handling any hotheads who resist," Rexinon said.
"The good news is that no one has yet been executed this evening. I'll personally see to it that those who abide by that order are given a chance to live long, productive lives within society. If all goes well, you will be the only casualty of this idiocy."
Rexinon gave the faintest sign of a smile with a halfhearted chuckle as he said, "Godric, one thing I'll not allow is any of the Order's work ending up in the hands of one of those tyrants. Therefore, I demand that Jonathan be given every document, scroll, and tome held within our strongholds for safekeeping." Rexinon felt exhausted. The spell to warn his Order took more out of him than anticipated.
"You're in no position to be making demands of us," Seth said. Godric finally snapped and struck him so hard that he slammed back into the wall beside the fireplace, cracking it. He got back to his feet a moment later, fixed his shirt, and looked down at the blood he'd wiped from his lip. Godric looked back at Rexinon.
"As you were saying."
"Assassin, I'd ask that you secure all our relics and artifacts, regardless of their magical significance. I don't need to tell you what all we have housed around Aurelia."
"No, you don't. The nukes of our time were nothing compared to some of those items," Assassin replied.
"We'll see to it that it's done. There are things within these walls that were never meant for untrained mortal hands," Godric added.
"Thank you."
"As for the texts, Jonathan will have a field day going through everything. There is far too much the council doesn't understand within these walls that we can't afford to lose."
"Godric was right, Rex. I still have everything. Much of which has been quite useful over the centuries,"
Godric turned his head away, no longer able to look Rexinon in the eye. "I no longer deserve the right to call you a friend, but is there anything else you would ask of me?"
Rexinon looked at Godric for a long time and couldn't help but smile. Not at his pain or suffering in following the orders given to him, but knowing that if anyone here had ever been a friend to him, Godric certainly was. With his final words, he left Godric with a warning.
"No, but I'll leave you with this. Be wary of those among you, for one will betray you all. My friend."
Godric nodded, accepting these as Rexinon's final words as a tear ran down his cheek. Rexinon lowered his head, and Assassin enveloped his axe's blade in a purple aura.
"Woah, Assassin, what's with the new color? Never seen that before," Seth asked.
Ignoring the question, Assassin swung the axe, severing Rexinon's head cleanly.
That night, the cries of the Order were heard in every city across Aurelia. All mourning the death of the Order's first, and last, headmaster.
Jonathan fought back tears of his own as he watched the axe's head vanish. Assassin secured the handle on his belt as he walked towards the desk. Godric looked as though he was going to be sick.
"Did you do as I asked?" Godric asked shakily.
"Of course. I may be a trained killer, but even I know this was bullshit, mate."
Seth walked over and picked up Rexinon's severed head by the hair. He held it up before him, a mischievous grin on his face. Then he whispered something into Rexinon's ear.
Assassin's eyes locked on Seth. As he let go of the head, he used one of his abilities, known as shadow step, to cross the distance to where Seth stood. Before Rexinon's head hit the ground, Assassin snatched it out of the air and punched Seth so hard that it sent him flying into the same section of the wall he'd hit earlier. He bounced off it, but the force of the impact sent several of the stones flying into the next room. Seth crumpled to the floor, where he lay unmoving for several seconds. After a while, his head snapped upright, and he began to laugh. He stood up as if nothing had happened and headed out the door. Godric, now seething with anger, watched as Assassin started to go after him. "Leave him. He's not worth your time."
Jonathan paced around the room, waiting for the spell to wear off. His heart ached, and his own anger toward Seth at that moment made him wish he could destroy the man. But that was Seth's way, and they'd all learned to let it go in time. The world began to blur and vanish, reverting to the Archive once again.
He closed the cover, placing the tome back on the shelf with a heavy sigh. His fingers lingered on the binding as he read the inscription, A Complete History of the Hellyrrian Order, Volume 666. Finally, Jonathan let his hand fall to the side as he walked away with his shoulders slumped.
As if speaking to an old friend, he lamented, "Damn you, Rex. Why couldn't you have just left well enough alone?"
As Jonathan walked away, he shed a tear at the loss of one of his closest friends.
submitted by Michael_AN_Creech to KeepWriting [link] [comments]
I've had several people beta read this for me and gotten a lot of positive feedback. The prolbem for me is that these were all people I know very well on a personal level. Several have made comparisons to Chronicles of Narnia or Lord of the Rings as far as how well the full book is written. The problem is, friends and family can often have a bias and make things seem better than they really are. So, now I want to do a test run in the real world and see what people who don't know me think. Is it as engaging and compelling as they have made me hope that it is?
I'm basically wanting to take a page from a couple authors I admire and follow the ABC rule for critiquing. Please let me know of any point where you thought it was Awesome, Boring or Confusing. I know prologues aren't everyone's favorite thing, but this has basically been written like a novella for the main story as it foreshadows a lot of things leading all the way into book four.
————————————————————————————
PROLOGUE
ARCHIVE INFINITUM
October 14, 844 (Alt-Future)
"Welcome back to the Archive, Master Jonathan."
"Thank you, Charles. It's good to be back. Have you noticed anything interesting in the Physical Realm?"
"I have not, sir. Do you require any assistance today?"
"Thank you, but no. I'm only here to revisit a passage within the history of the Order. Shortly after, I'll depart for the reunion at the Tower."
"Excellent, sir. I'll leave you to it."
Jonathan emerged from the ether and walked through the Archive doors. Inhaling deeply, he breathed in the familiar scents of dusty cleanliness that can only truly be found in a place of learning. The lights reflected off the floor's white marble surface, casting a glow that evenly lit every corner of the large chamber. Even so, the room still felt cavernous to him, as if he were a galleon amidst the vastness of the ocean.
Jonathan appeared to be in his early to mid forties. Though, with the way he carried himself and the spring in his step, he seemed closer to his late twenties. His hair was shoulder length and dark gray. He wore bifocals though he hadn't needed them since his ascension, and dressed with a refined sense of style.
His gray eyes were by far his most interesting feature, though. They were the only hint of how old he truly was and the many adventures and travesties he'd witnessed. Regardless, how old he was didn't matter as age had long since lost its meaning for him. After all, being an immortal tended to give a man new priorities in life.
As he strolled across the room, a lift descended from the tower's heights. The square platform had waist high rails around its perimeter. It floated through the air showing no sign of a suspension system to raise or lower it. This was accomplished by a magical enchantment that allowed it to levitate and dart about the room at mind numbing speeds. As he stepped up onto the platform's dais, it landed on the floor in front of him. He took a position at its center, then, after folding his arms behind his back, mentally willed it to take him to floor eight hundred forty four.
It rose off the ground, gradually gaining speed until it was a hundred or so feet in the air. At that point, the platform took off like a rocket. The thought of what these speeds would do to him if this were outside the Realm of Intellect crossed his mind, making him chuckle nervously. He knew he had to be moving close to six hundred miles per hour.
Now, let me tell you a bit about Jonathan's pet project, The Archive Infinitum. The Archive is a magical structure he'd designed shortly after the cataclysm that nearly wiped out the human race. An event most of you now refer to as the Night of Burning Skies. That same event is also what gave us the powers we now refer to as magic.
Shortly after obtaining his ascension, he learned that science's multiverse theories were close to how reality really worked. There are an infinite number of parallel universes, or branching timelines, that coexist simultaneously. What was different is that each universe shared a common six realm structure. The Physical Realm, the Realm of Intellect, the Dominion of Shadows, the Plane of Enlightenment, the Land of the Forgotten, and the Ether.
He built the Archive within the Realm of Intellect so it wouldn't be bound by the laws of physics or time as we know them. Once the structure was anchored in place, he could set most of those parameters himself. What he didn't realize was that making it here would have an unintended, though not unwelcome, side effect. The structure's size, shape, and architectural style could change by anyone who entered it.
When someone enters the Archive, it ascertains their strength of mind and will. Suppose the individual's mental fortitude is deemed stronger than that of the other occupants. In that case, the appearance will adjust to one that best serves and appeals to that individual. This could become unsettling for the occupants already inside the first few times it happened. That being said, it has no effect on the contents atop the shelves or where you're located within the structure. For Jonathan, it shared an uncanny resemblance to the George Peabody Library, though on a much grander scale.
The lift stopped after a brief ride, and Jonathan stepped off. He resumed his stride, passing row after row of the cherry wood bookcases. There were hundreds of rows and thousands of tomes and scrolls in each. As a scholar, he'd spent most of his existence here. But, even so, he knew there would always be something more to be gleaned from their pages.
Today was a day of remembrance. Of celebration. Of mourning. It was the anniversary of the end of a war that had lasted ten thousand years. With the death of one individual, a light of hope was given to many. For others, it was a bittersweet victory that left a void in their hearts. He'd come here today to revisit a passage that would return him to that fateful day. Reliving the event which granted them this peace, and once again, paying his respects to a dear friend.
"Ah, yes, yes, yes. Here we go."
The plaque on the side of the bookcase read, Row DD, Column 15. Now that he'd found the right one, he began scanning the shelves. It wasn't long before his hand landed on the tome he sought.
"Here it is." He pulled it down from the shelf. "My word. Has it truly been fifteen hundred years since I glanced through these pages?"
Looking at the cover, he chuckled. The combined magic of the Archive and the Realm had created a thin layer of dust. Giving it the feeling of something ancient and lost to time. Raising it to his lips, he blew the dust away, causing the magic to dissipate as it fell to the floor. He pulled open the cover and rifled through the pages. The section he stopped at contained the account of Rexinon the Prophet's final words.
Summoning his divine magics, he channeled a spell into the tome. The words that once filled the passages began to fade away, leaving only the blank pages, which now bled a blueish gray smoke. The soft glow of the lights against the floor diminished as the smoke spread. As the darkness grew more substantial, luminescent spheres and arcs of brilliant blues and crimson could be seen dancing about its surface like lightning.
The ground trembled beneath his feet, and the smokey haze took on a more stormlike appearance. All around him, the air started to feel heavy, and the taste of dust and sea salt filled his mouth. A gentle rain began to fall, and the room's remaining lights winked out. If not for the increasing flashes of lightning, he would've been left in total darkness. But even this was not a comfort, as those flashes cast shadows against the storm's ever swirling walls. Many of which appeared to be dark things that should never be seen in the light.
The storm's intensity grew, bringing disorienting cracks of thunder and wind whipping around him. It assaulted his senses and seemed to have an almost vengeful purpose. That meant he had to constantly focus on the spell, bracing himself against the onslaught. If he failed, it would kill him without question.
Some of the shadows began to take on a physical form with details beyond what the walls could offer them. He watched as an hourglass tumbled end over end, circling him before it returned to the storm. A moment later, a blazing fireplace and mantle emerged but produced neither light nor heat. Finally, a door engraved with the crest of the Order appeared. These images were ones he'd expected to see for this particular passage, and so came as no surprise. However, when a fourth image appeared, he was caught off guard.
Although it was normal for three images to accompany this spell, an occasional fourth spoke of prophecy. He focused intently on this final image. It showed twelve people standing in a circle; one of them was coated in blood. Two others were bound by chains. One a man, the other a woman.
He looked closer at the man and realized it was Godric. His eyes opened wide as he tried to decipher the meaning behind the image. Only a few moments passed while he speculated, but it was a few moments too many. Disaster struck, and too late, he realized his mistake. He'd lost focus, and now the storm would surely take him.
Hurricane force winds and debris tore at his clothes, quickly turning them into rags. One powerful gust slammed into his side as if he'd been struck by a car, knocking him off his feet. The storm swelled with even greater ferocity. It threatened to consume him this time, and he wondered if it would finally cost him.
Rain and hail pelted his face and body, while dust and sand stung his eyes. As he wiped away the grit, a bolt of lightning struck before him, temporarily blinding him. He got to his hands and knees, gasping for breath as the storm continued to beat him relentlessly.
Steeling himself against the pain, he rose to his feet. As fast as he could manage, he began casting mental defenses and barriers to protect his mind from the horrific assault. He bellowed in defiance of the storm, "I will not let it end this way! I refuse!" One defense after another was laid upon his person, until finally, he succeeded. The winds died to a breeze as the rain became little more than a summer misting.
He heard the sound of a quill scratching against paper over the storm's remnants, and the air behind his back grew hot as a crackling fire joined the room's ambiance. The sickly sweet smell of incense filled his nostrils, reminding him of days spent in his master's study. Another fond memory.
The storm wall vanished as the tremors subsided, making the room visible through a misty haze. The light of the fireplace cast his shadow across the now rough cut gray stone floor. Half a dozen tapestries hung around the room, and a liquor cabinet stood at the room's far corner. The main entry door remained closed to his left, and the doorway to the study's balcony lay to his right. At the room's center sat Rexinon at his desk, writing furiously on a piece of parchment.
Wiping the sweat from his brow, he breathed a sigh of relief. Although he'd done this countless times, the journey into the pages of history was always filled with peril. But, blessedly, the most intense part of the spell was complete. And while he could now relax in that fact, that fourth image still concerned him.
He stood in the familiar square room, clothing restored to its original state. The evening's air flowed through the open windows, making the ambient temperature quite cozy. Crossing the room, he paused at the desk and listened as Rexinon started muttering. "What I wouldn't give for a typewriter, much less a computer. Would make this so much faster."
Jonathan couldn't help but crack a smile. "Oh, but how many times have I thought the same thing, old friend?" He remarked, though he knew Rexinon couldn't hear him.
He stepped up to the desk and leaned over it. Looking down at the paper Rexinon was writing on, he frowned. Like so many times before, it appeared as little more than black scribbles on a page. Those words had to be important, but there was no way to know.
This was one of the spell's critical weaknesses. The details within the vision were only as precise as what was written in the tome. Most of the books in the Archive were magically transcribed. The benefits of this were completed histories free of victor and writer biases. Although, it wasn't flawless.
Throughout history, there have been individuals or events that the spell couldn't see. The most well known examples of these blips in time were the United States presidency of Franklin D. Roosevelt from 1933 to 1945 and the United Kingdom's Prime Minister, Michael Durham, from 2063 to 2065. All that is known about them was their lives before office and the accounts written by those around them. These gaps in history were generally the result of one of two things. In these two cases, a place or individual with a strong connection to the Dominion of Shadows.
Sighing, he pushed off the desk and crossed the room to the liquor cabinet. He opened the glass doors, pulling several bottles and a glass from the shelves. He made a drink consisting of three parts Red Adders Bite and one part Dry Amorian Blood Wine, then added a lime wedge to the rim of the glass. The others wouldn't arrive for another half hour, leaving him time to kill.
He walked around the room with his drink in hand and studied the various tapestries, several of which he'd been a part of. Each one depicted an accomplishment or tragedy facilitated by the Order. All save one, which showed a scene from the event that started it all.
The one to the left of the cabinet showed the Order's founding. In the background stood a grand tower of black and white marble. Its four sides were engraved with the Mark of Hellyrr, which glowed with a magical light. In front of it stood a man facing a gathered crowd, his arms swept wide in triumph. They looked up at him and the structure with reverence and awe.
He continued to move in a counterclockwise manner around the room. Above the main entry door hung another tapestry. One he was even depicted in. It showed the aftermath of a massacre. Six figures stood amidst the bodies of hundreds. The earth around them was scorched by flame, and the blood of the fallen had stained it red. The cloud covered sky glowed a deep crimson with gold outlines from the fires below. It had come to be known as the Cleansing of Elysian, in which the entirety of the planet's second continent had been annihilated to preserve the world.
"I wish it had never come to this. Why can't we all just get along? Instead of thriving in the prosperity of our two lands, they plotted and began planning to bring war to our own people. To rape, pillage, and enslave them. Even with all my vast knowledge and wisdom, I can't understand why they felt the need to dominate and control the world." He looked back up at the tapestry. "Even now, most of the land is still uninhabitable."
He turned around and looked at the tapestry above the balcony door. This one would appear out of place with the others to all but a few handfuls of people. Even for those who learned the truth behind it, it looked like little more than an artist's vision of what a beautiful landscape at sunset should look like. The sky is dotted with hundreds of stars as shades of red, orange, and yellow dance across the land's horizon. The artist's point of view appears to be looking down from a hillside. Down the hill's slope, you can see a pond teaming with wildlife along its edge. The remaining landscape is filled with miles of forest stretching toward the horizon.
For the few who survived this event and still remained, they knew it depicted the final moments of their world before all of humanity was nearly lost.
Jonathan fixated on this tapestry more than he had on the others. The longer he stared, the more distant his expression grew. Over time, his breathing quickened, and his grip on the glass slipped. It shattered as it hit the floor, causing the rug to stain from the liquid. The sound jerked him out of the trance like state, making him feel ill.
He could still recall the memory of that long ago day like it were yesterday. The thought of how close humanity had come to extinction made his legs weak, and he stumbled back against the wall behind him. He slid down the stones' cool surface and noticed his hands were now trembling. Through shuddering breaths, he uttered the words of a broken man. "So much death. So many lives were lost that day. So many. Oh, Sonia. Even after all this time, I still miss you."
The main entry door slammed open, crashing against the wall with a loud bang. Jonathan jerked as one of them collided mere inches from where he sat. The startling sound had been enough to pull him from his stupor, but it still took a moment for him to gather himself. A man in the doorway lowered his foot from where he'd obviously kicked the unlocked door in.
"Knock, knock, Rex. Seems you've done it now."
"Seth. I'll never understand the animosity you held for Rexinon," Jonathan said wearily as he got to his feet.
Seth stood just shy of five foot eight inches and had slick black hair that he kept combed back. He wore black jeans and a beige dress shirt with mother of pearl buttons, which had seen far too much polish in recent days. A malevolent grin displayed his perfect teeth and careless eyes. He strode into the room, dragging a chair behind him, and placed it on the rug by the fireplace.
"Was kicking the door in really necessary, Seth?"
A second man stepped into the room, obviously annoyed by the unnecessary use of force. He wore a navy blue business suit and towered over everyone else in the room, and that was saying something considering Jonathan was six foot. As he still held to the standards of a marine, he kept his hair high and tight and his face clean shaven. He stood at the rug's edge out of respect for the Order so as not to mar the embroidered Mark of Hellyrr. A respect Seth clearly lacked.
"Godric Gibbs. This day changed you. Hell, it changed all of us, but few as much as you," Jonathan said. He looked back at the door as the third and final man entered. "Assassin."
This man was of a height with Jonathan and wore all black from head to toe. His outfit looked like something out of a TV show. Almost like a cross between Gi Joe's Snake Eyes, and CW Arrow's League of Assassins. After ten thousand years, all they knew about him was his previous occupation as a contract killer. It wasn't long before they'd taken to calling him Assassin, as they had no other name to go by. Any time he was asked a question regarding his past, he either remained silent or dodged it outright. He took a position to Godric's left and, like Godric, took care of where he stood on the rug.
The three men stood in silence and watched as Rexinon continued to write. Godric and Assassin seemed content to wait until he addressed them. On the other hand, Seth seemed to grow more agitated as the minutes passed. Jonathan chuckled in spite of himself.
About twenty minutes later, Rexinon spoke, "Reverend Seth Jones, Colonel Godric Gibbs, and Assassin. To what do I owe the pleasure?" His tone plainly indicated that he already knew.
Seth spoke first. "Oh, cut the crap, Rex. You already know why we're here. This cult thing of yours has gone on long enough."
"Well, there's the pot calling the kettle black," Jonathan muttered sarcastically.
Godric rolled his eyes. Everyone in the room knew about Seth's past as a cult leader. They also knew his anger was more at being forced to wait in silence than anything to do with Rexinon or the Order.
"Calm yourself, Seth. There's no need for such hostilities." Godric looked at Rexinon apologetically. "I'm sorry to have to do this, old friend, but my hands are tied. Rexinon the Prophet, Headmaster of the Hellyrrian Order, you've been charged with conspiracy to overthrow the governments of Aurelia and seize control for the Order.
"As we speak, the leaders of the Hellyrrian Order are being gathered for execution. Furthermore, your towers and all their artifacts will be destroyed, and any remnants of the Order's existence is to be wiped from the face of history. As of 0813 this morning, you have been sentenced to death. How do you plead?"
Rexinon continued to write at an incredible rate. He knew why they'd come. He'd known this was coming for months. After all, his gift was the gift of prophecy. The evidence for the charges against him was both substantial and ethereal, depending on what light was shown on it.
Two centuries ago, the Order had tracked the activities of an unknown number of individuals who'd been subtly manipulating several of the Aurelian governing bodies. They'd spread like a poison, corrupting them and turning once prosperous kingdoms which knew few hardships, into lands where the people had to fight just to survive. The problem was that whoever that force had been, always seemed to be just one step ahead of them. Now, not only was it check, but checkmate. The Order had lost.
"I believe the Righteous Twelve to be ill advised. I believe you've been manipulated by the same corrupted governing body which we've spent so long trying to purify—." Seth grunted. "—But," he said at length, "I accept all charges against me, save one. Neither myself nor anyone else of the Order has ever sought to rule Aurelia, as the charges would imply. The Cleansing of Elysian should've been proof enough to show that to be true."
Rexinon penned the final words of his letter and placed the pen back in its stand. Pulling the top off a jar, he dusted the page with a thin layer of sand to soak up any excess ink. After dumping the sand back into another jar to be cleaned, he pushed away from his desk and stood to look at his guests for the first time. After nudging his stool back under, he addressed Godric directly.
"Will you join me on the balcony one last time?"
Godric nodded his head and gestured towards the balcony doorway. As they stepped outside, Jonathan followed.
Rexinon leaned against the railing and looked out over the city, his gaze fixed on the setting sun. Godric joined him and looked down to the tower's base, some five hundred feet below. Although he was not afraid of heights, it gave him respect for the sturdily mounted railing at the balcony's edge.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Rexinon said. Godric looked at him, confused. "The way the world has turned out since that day? Ten thousand years of watching as civilization was rebuilt and destroyed time and time again by a senseless war. Watching them evolve into something more as they learned how to use these gifts we were given. In some ways, we're greater than we ever were. In other ways, we're inferior. If I have any regrets, it's that I couldn't do more to leave the people better prepared for this new age."
"Well spoken. If it's any consolation, I believe this is wrong. I even spoke out against the council for a different outcome. For my efforts, though, I was threatened with execution if I didn't cease my objections."
Rexinon's tone grew heated after hearing of the council's reaction. "You should know better than anyone why I fought so hard against them, then. I'm not against governance. I'm against corrupt governance. We had far too many corrupt politicians and warlords in our own time for me to ever want to allow it again."
Godric nodded his head. "Yes. The problem is you played too heavy a hand too quickly. Instead of accepting that they'd been beaten, they cheated by playing with an ace they had hidden up their collective sleeves."
Rexinon sighed, knowing his words were true. "Indeed. I've accepted my fate. I won't run. Won't even make it difficult for y'all. I have no need to. I would like to make one final request to ease your conscience, though."
Rexinon leaned toward Godric conspiratorially. As he did this, the world around them began to shimmer and distort. Almost like the motion blurring you'd see on a TV. Likewise, their conversation was masked by the sound of white noise and the sound of hushed incoherent whispers.
This was the second hurdle the scrying spells had to deal with. Individuals with divine magic could conceal their conversations or even the events they were a part of. Rexinon had concealed this conversation, and to this day, Godric has never spoken of what was said.
Jonathan returned to the study with a resigned sigh. There was nothing more he could learn from their conversation. Assassin stood in the same spot he'd been when he first entered the room and looked as if he hadn't so much as twitched. Seth, however, was rummaging through the desk's drawers. He'd tried to figure out what he was looking for in the past, but nothing seemed obvious.
The shards of glass from when he'd dropped his cup earlier had vanished, along with the stain on the rug from the liquor. As expected, the glass had returned to the cabinet, and the bottles had refilled to where they were before he'd arrived. This was yet another reminder that this was a magically induced vision of an event that had long since passed. It could be too easy to forget that this wasn't real and that if he spent too much time here, it would have consequences in the real world for him.
He knew they'd be out there a while. In previous visits, he'd occasionally spent this time combing through the room, similar to what Seth was doing. Having cataloged everything centuries ago, there was nothing left to do but wait. So, he walked around the desk and sat squarely within the Mark of Hellyrr embroidered on the rug. There, for the next hour or so, he would remain, arms folded, legs crossed, and eyes shut. Freeing his mind of all unnecessary thoughts and emotions. At least, that was the plan.
About forty minutes in, Seth started to grumble and complain, forcing Jonathan to give up on his meditation. "… I know he's one of the humblest among our kind, but lord, does he have to be so dull? I can't find anything interesting anywhere. Even his liquor cabinet is dull." Seth walked from behind the desk to the liquor cabinet, pulled a few bottles out at random, and read the labels aloud. "Red Adders Bite, Amorian Blood Wine. Christ, he's even got Athester's Sweet Malt. This crap might as well be water." He pulled another bottle down and said, "At least he's got the taste to have at least one bottle of Nordic Berserker."
"Some of us prefer the simpler things in life. You might find life more enjoyable when you aren't always looking for the rare and exotic," Assassin said with a disinterested, almost dismissive tone.
Seth clicked his tongue. "Hell, even this letter he was so focused on when we arrived makes no sense." Seth thrust the letter towards Assassin, who took it nonchalantly. "Look at this."
Jonathan studied Assassin intently, hoping for any sign that would reveal the letter's contents. It was no use, though; for all the emotion he showed, Jonathan would've thought it no more important than a grocery list. But, if that were the case, why obscure it from the eyes of the scrying spell? The frustration caused by such a simple sheet of paper was baffling.
Jonathan got to his feet as Rexinon and Godric returned. As Rexinon walked to stand at the center of the rug, Jonathan moved behind the desk. Godric walked toward Assassin and conversed with him for a few minutes. Once again, the sound of white noise shrouded what was said. This time, it was Godric who masked his words from the spell. When Assassin nodded, Godric moved beside him and faced Rexinon.
Rexinon looked at each tapestry and seemed to relive each as he did so. They all knew those accomplishments and tragedies would stand the test of time. Any efforts to change that would fall flat. The Order had played too significant a role in shaping this new world. Finally, he turned to Godric, kneeling as he met his regret filled eyes.
Assassin pulled an infamous rod from his side, dubbed the Executioner's Handle. Forged in the Dominion of Shadow by Assassin some three thousand years ago. It was one and a half feet long of shadow infused steel and bound with his own divine essence. Ominous black tendrils crawled along Assassin's hand like something alive and flowed into the handle. The shaft elongated, and an axe head formed at its end.
Though he had accepted his fate, seeing that axe form made Rexinon's heart stop momentarily. He looked at Godric questioningly. Godric knew what that look meant and nodded his head in assent. Agreeing to this had allowed them both to right several wrongs this night by asking one simple question. "Do you have any final words or requests?"
"I have two, if you'll grant them. The first, allow me to disband the Order formally as my final act as headmaster."
Seth started to protest, but Assassin lowered the axehead in his direction as a silent threat. Seth glared at Assassin with seething hatred. Godric nodded to Rexinon. "Proceed."
As the headmaster of the Hellyrrian Order, he had a mental connection with every member. Without hesitation, Rexinon's eyes began to glow with a brilliant purple hue. This would be Rexinon's final order, and Godric knew it would save thousands.
"My brothers and sisters, hear me now and heed my words. Abandon the Order and save yourselves. Flee to the hills and never look back to what we once were. With my dying breath, the Hellyrrian Order is no more. The governments of Aurelia have played a hand we can't stand against. Anyone who disregards this command will be hunted down and executed without mercy. To the leaders and guild masters of the Order, I charge you with dismantling everything relating to the Order and turning over every artifact and document you can to Godric the Just, Jonathan the Wise, or Assassin the Watcher. I also ask that you help calm those who feel outraged and betrayed by this night. Do not blame the Twelve, as they were little more than pawns in this corrupt game of politics. Farewell, my friends. My family. May the peace we have fought for be found in the coming days."
The glow faded, and he slumped forward onto his hands, his breathing labored. A few moments passed, and he managed to catch his breath but still looked towards the ground.
"The second request I have is that anyone who would heed that warning be spared. The ruling factions wanted me. As long as no one else causes trouble, we know they won't cause too much fuss over it."
His voice took on a much sharper edge as he looked back up. "You call us a cult, though you know we are nothing of the sort. On the contrary, our Order has stood for nearly five thousand years for the betterment of the entire world. How they treated you should tell you that what I said and what we were doing was justified."
"Shut your mouth, Rex!" Seth spat venomously.
Godric glared at Seth. His own anger with this situation was at the point of breaking free. "Be silent! I don't know what kind of grudge you have, but I, for one, don't give a damn what the council said. Rexinon doesn't deserve death for the crimes he's being accused of. Unfortunately, the ruling factions in almost every nation are corrupted and working towards being as corrupt as they were back in our day." Godric sighed. "Regrettably, my hands are tied, though. The law is the law, and I have been overruled on this matter. Regardless of what my conscience thinks, I will abide by the rules of the land."
Rexinon nodded, understanding Godric's situation perfectly. Godric had become the divine embodiment of law and justice at his ascension. While those two things work hand in hand, they are far from the same, and one must often walk a fine line to serve them both. In this case, the choices were clear. In the end, it didn't matter what he chose; he would inevitably betray one virtue or the other. Unfortunately, there was no good way for him to handle this, and Rexinon could see how this was affecting him.
"The majority of the Order will heed my warning. As for the leaders, if any are still alive, they will follow that command to the letter. They'll even aid you in handling any hotheads who resist," Rexinon said.
"The good news is that no one has yet been executed this evening. I'll personally see to it that those who abide by that order are given a chance to live long, productive lives within society. If all goes well, you will be the only casualty of this idiocy."
Rexinon gave the faintest sign of a smile with a halfhearted chuckle as he said, "Godric, one thing I'll not allow is any of the Order's work ending up in the hands of one of those tyrants. Therefore, I demand that Jonathan be given every document, scroll, and tome held within our strongholds for safekeeping." Rexinon felt exhausted. The spell to warn his Order took more out of him than anticipated.
"You're in no position to be making demands of us," Seth said. Godric finally snapped and struck him so hard that he slammed back into the wall beside the fireplace, cracking it. He got back to his feet a moment later, fixed his shirt, and looked down at the blood he'd wiped from his lip. Godric looked back at Rexinon.
"As you were saying."
"Assassin, I'd ask that you secure all our relics and artifacts, regardless of their magical significance. I don't need to tell you what all we have housed around Aurelia."
"No, you don't. The nukes of our time were nothing compared to some of those items," Assassin replied.
"We'll see to it that it's done. There are things within these walls that were never meant for untrained mortal hands," Godric added.
"Thank you."
"As for the texts, Jonathan will have a field day going through everything. There is far too much the council doesn't understand within these walls that we can't afford to lose."
"Godric was right, Rex. I still have everything. Much of which has been quite useful over the centuries,"
Godric turned his head away, no longer able to look Rexinon in the eye. "I no longer deserve the right to call you a friend, but is there anything else you would ask of me?"
Rexinon looked at Godric for a long time and couldn't help but smile. Not at his pain or suffering in following the orders given to him, but knowing that if anyone here had ever been a friend to him, Godric certainly was. With his final words, he left Godric with a warning.
"No, but I'll leave you with this. Be wary of those among you, for one will betray you all. My friend."
Godric nodded, accepting these as Rexinon's final words as a tear ran down his cheek. Rexinon lowered his head, and Assassin enveloped his axe's blade in a purple aura.
"Woah, Assassin, what's with the new color? Never seen that before," Seth asked.
Ignoring the question, Assassin swung the axe, severing Rexinon's head cleanly.
That night, the cries of the Order were heard in every city across Aurelia. All mourning the death of the Order's first, and last, headmaster.
Jonathan fought back tears of his own as he watched the axe's head vanish. Assassin secured the handle on his belt as he walked towards the desk. Godric looked as though he was going to be sick.
"Did you do as I asked?" Godric asked shakily.
"Of course. I may be a trained killer, but even I know this was bullshit, mate."
Seth walked over and picked up Rexinon's severed head by the hair. He held it up before him, a mischievous grin on his face. Then he whispered something into Rexinon's ear.
Assassin's eyes locked on Seth. As he let go of the head, he used one of his abilities, known as shadow step, to cross the distance to where Seth stood. Before Rexinon's head hit the ground, Assassin snatched it out of the air and punched Seth so hard that it sent him flying into the same section of the wall he'd hit earlier. He bounced off it, but the force of the impact sent several of the stones flying into the next room. Seth crumpled to the floor, where he lay unmoving for several seconds. After a while, his head snapped upright, and he began to laugh. He stood up as if nothing had happened and headed out the door. Godric, now seething with anger, watched as Assassin started to go after him. "Leave him. He's not worth your time."
Jonathan paced around the room, waiting for the spell to wear off. His heart ached, and his own anger toward Seth at that moment made him wish he could destroy the man. But that was Seth's way, and they'd all learned to let it go in time. The world began to blur and vanish, reverting to the Archive once again.
He closed the cover, placing the tome back on the shelf with a heavy sigh. His fingers lingered on the binding as he read the inscription, A Complete History of the Hellyrrian Order, Volume 666. Finally, Jonathan let his hand fall to the side as he walked away with his shoulders slumped.
As if speaking to an old friend, he lamented, "Damn you, Rex. Why couldn't you have just left well enough alone?"
As Jonathan walked away, he shed a tear at the loss of one of his closest friends.
2023.06.09 16:03 Fh989 It’s here!!! Loewe Mini Hammock Hobo in Warm Desert.
 | So she finally arrived! Sorry for the poor lighting, it’s almost midnight here and the light is so warm it almost looks mustard? Rest assured it is more of a light tan, and not as orange as it appears on the Loewe website. Bought from Cettire and arrived with a Loewe dust bag. submitted by Fh989 to handbags [link] [comments] First impressions: Pros: This bag fits a decent amount. At 9.5cm wide I could fit a mini umbrella in it, it’s not massive but it’s the exact size I was looking for. Leather is buttery and smooth, and I have always preferred smooth leather over pebbled so I don’t care too much about scratches. More character! Zipper is secure and I won’t be worried about things falling out or being hard to access. Quality seems up to Loewes usual standards. I think they priced it accurately as it’s very simple and casual, I wouldn’t pay any more for it as it’s not as detailed as the Puzzle or Goya for example. It has minimal hardware and branding, and it gets that slouchy crescent shape when I wear it on the shoulder. Cons: The strap is thiinnnnn. I’ll see how my shoulder goes tomorrow. I also don’t love the bump on the bottom where they bonded the base of the bag if that makes sense? I’ll be interested to see if it comes in any other sizes in the future. And I added my balloon bag so you can see the contrast between the warm desert and tan shades. Loewe addiction is real you guys! If you are looking for something more structured than the flamenco and more secure than the mini hammock, this bag is a great option. |
2023.06.09 14:02 Zaganoak Nervous about going to an event tomorrow
I was 19 when I went to my first queer event night. The community was very male-centric and hyper-normative back then and most people there were quite hostile towards me. I thought, maybe I don't belong here after all, maybe they can tell I'm not really one of them. I tried again in smaller amounts, in uni groups etc run by much the same people, and ended up at the conclusion that this wasn't something that was open to me, that I was probably bi anyway, and that I would never meet sapphic girls who I would be good enough for, so I tried to leave the whole thing behind...for over ten years.
I can't ignore it anymore and feel terrible for all the time I've lost, so I set an event in my calendar for a meet-up at a women's only wlw space. I'm older and more confident now, and willing to try again. In theory, that is. The event is tomorrow and I'm so anxious.
List of my fears:
-Being negatively different to everyone else to the point that they all notice (happens a lot. I'm conventionally ugly and dress funny and have shaved eyebrows etc, as well as sub-zero social skills outside of niche nerd communities where I thrive lol)
-Being older than everyone else by a decade and getting the gold-star judgement I've learned all about on reddit
-General social anxiety that I'm going to say something weird and put off an entire community
-There's not a lot of info about the event besides that it's a 'coming out meet-up' at a wlw and I have no idea what to expect. It's scary. What if I know people there and it's awkward? My town isn't that big.
Anyone got any tips on how to prepare or how to not stress myself out too much so I don't stay in bed and flake on the whole thing? Stories about your own first meet-ups and how they turned out totally fine most welcome!
submitted by Zaganoak to latebloomerlesbians [link] [comments]
I can't ignore it anymore and feel terrible for all the time I've lost, so I set an event in my calendar for a meet-up at a women's only wlw space. I'm older and more confident now, and willing to try again. In theory, that is. The event is tomorrow and I'm so anxious.
List of my fears:
-Being negatively different to everyone else to the point that they all notice (happens a lot. I'm conventionally ugly and dress funny and have shaved eyebrows etc, as well as sub-zero social skills outside of niche nerd communities where I thrive lol)
-Being older than everyone else by a decade and getting the gold-star judgement I've learned all about on reddit
-General social anxiety that I'm going to say something weird and put off an entire community
-There's not a lot of info about the event besides that it's a 'coming out meet-up' at a wlw and I have no idea what to expect. It's scary. What if I know people there and it's awkward? My town isn't that big.
Anyone got any tips on how to prepare or how to not stress myself out too much so I don't stay in bed and flake on the whole thing? Stories about your own first meet-ups and how they turned out totally fine most welcome!
2023.06.09 13:53 Acrobatic-Drop7158 I'm scared, depressed, anxious, tired of waiting. I just feel lost. I look forward to the future but I'm scared that it's a bad future
I'm going to try to write my thoughts and feelings down as best as I can. I don't know if it will make any sense. I don't know if I will reread it either. I just need to get my thoughts out somehow. I don't know if I want advice or if I will even respond to any comments but if you have any thoughts please comment if not for me than anyone else who could come across this post.
I'm 22 years old. I struggle with self harm. I am scared to tell my family. I know my mom will blame herself for not seeing it. it's been almost 8 years since I started. I was 14, almost 15 when I first started doing it. The last time I did it was 5 months ago, but I still get the urge sometimes. I think I'm spiraling into depression again. For the last few days I haven't been eating enough, but every time I look at food I just don't know what to eat because nothing sparks hunger. I drink a lot of water, orange juice and other things, so I know I'm not dehydrated. Sometimes I feel happy when I don't eat a lot of food. Because I want to lose weight. And it's nice to have one thing that I can control. I don't have anything else I can control. I don't feel tired when I lay down to sleep, but luckily I'm not struggling too much with falling asleep right now. It was way worse when I was in high school. I hate that it's summer now. It's so hot and the days are longer. I hate the expectation that you have to go out in the nice weather and have fun. It also doesn't help that I struggle with lots of sweating and because of my self harm scars I don't want to wear anything but long-sleeved clothes. It's hard to get out of bed when I wake up in the morning. I have woken up at 6 am almost every day, probably because of the sun and I just hate it. I try to sleep more but when I wake up again I start scrolling on my phone which can be hours.
I hate my life. I don't remember a time where I haven't hated my life. I grew up with an alcoholic dad. He could go long between drinking but when he drank it could last one day or up to a week. He never physically hurt me or anything but it made me feel lonely. Dad was there physically but not there emotionally. Sometimes I blame my mom for not leaving him. They're not married but it's also not easy to just move because of money issues and how expensive everything is. I don't live with them anymore. I don't really have contact with my dad anymore, only mom. I remember them arguing a lot and I am happy I don't have to witness that every day anymore. I also hate my dad for letting one of our dogs run away. I think I was 13 when it happened. He was out hunting with our dog and she did have a gps on her collar but apparently it didn't work and they couldn't find her again. She was just 5 or 6 years old. I still miss her. I also miss the first dog we had who died of cancer when she was 14. I think the cancer could have been avoided if my parents just fed her food she was supposed to have and not leftovers from their food. I'm scared for the current dog we got. I'm scared that she will become obese because she is always fed food she isn't supposed to have. They walk her a lot but that doesn't really help if she is fed too much food. I also remember being a kid and being scared of that one Bratz episode where Burdine force feeds this man until he dies. I remember being scared that my mom would die because she is overweight. She has always tried to lose weight but she has never been successful. I'm scared that my mom will die because I don't know what I will do without her.
When I was about 16 or 17, I sent nudes to a stranger online. Sometimes I'm scared that people will find out about it. I think the reason I did it was because I was so lonely. I had friends in high school at the time but I didn't feel included. I felt like I was the one person in our group that didn't belong. I just didn't feel like any of my friends cared about me. And I'm sure they believed I didn't care about them either. Because I had an argument with one of them about something stupid. She cried but I didn't cry and I have had so many dreams about it. It's been many years but I hate what I did. She was my best friend and I fucked it up. She was the first person I told about my self harm. When I told her, she made sure that I would be safe and she had me sleep over at her house that night. I will always be thankful for her.
I was never bullied in school, only teased a little bit but I didn't feel safe at school either. I was scared to tell teachers that I needed to pee and so I wet myself on multiple occasions. Embarrassing but it happened at least twice. I also did something very stupid when I was about 7 or 8. Someone in my year told me to do something and I did it because I was scared to say no. I got in trouble for doing it and I tried to tell the teachers that they forced me to do it but they didn't understand what I was trying to say and my mom grounded me. That didn't really do anything though. I also remember when I was 14 that I refused to play volleyball when my class was supposed to play. The teacher told all of us that we had to because no one in the class volunteered. I absolutely hated it because some of the boys in my year would always correct me whenever we played it in phys ed. Eventually the teacher told me that I could do something else and I got to help another teacher carry some chairs into a shed. I also remember the first time I hurt myself. I remember the exact date and I remember the following Monday in phys ed and I told the teacher I forgot my gym clothes and couldn't participate. I remember that after the class was done he tried to talk to me because he noticed something was off but he didn't dig deep enough for me to tell him what I had done. Sometimes I wonder if people I went to school with realised that I had hurt myself because I used to wear t shirts to phys ed but then suddenly just started wearing long sleeve shirts. Sometimes I even wonder if my mom secretly knows because I always wear long sleeve shirts.
I never knew I was autistic until I was about 20 years old. I am angry that no one saw it. I was the one that had to figure it out. My mom was told that I would just grow out of my "shy" nature. I wasn't shy, I was fucking anxious about everything. I was clearly struggling but no one helped me. I remember when I was about 13 years old, the school nurse was worried about me because I was alone during recess and got me to talk to this woman. I had friends but I also liked to be alone. I don't know what exactly the woman worked as but I remember the book we used in sessions had the words cognitive behaviour therapy on it. No one told me why I had to see this woman. how can you expect to help a child when the child doesn't even know why they're there to begin with or the child doesn't even know they apparently need help. One day the sessions just stopped and that was that. Nothing came out of it and it didn't help. The only thing I'm grateful for is that she suggested that I participate in an after school activity. I joined a choir and was there until I was 18. I loved singing in the choir, I also got to sing some solo songs too but I never got any friends out of it. I just showed up to all the practices and performances but never felt comfortable enough to make friends.
When I was in first grade, I got diagnosed with dyslexia which I have always thought was wrong. And even one of my teachers in school never even knew I had the diagnosis and she didn't notice anything. Is it possible that they misdiagnosed me with dyslexia instead of autism? It has just never been a diagnosis I identified with. Autism is different though. I got the diagnosis when I was 20 and I know it fits me. I just don't feel like I belong with other autistic people. There are so many things that don't fit me or I just don't experience but is apparently something "all" other autistic people seem to struggle with. I'm tired of not feeling like I belong anywhere. I don't even feel safe in my own apartment. I hate the placement of the living room windows and I hate the tiny space between the counter and stove. I hate that I can hear every fucking time someone uses the bathroom. When I'm in the shower it feels like everyone can hear that I am in the shower. I'm scared to wash my clothes because the washing machine is loud and I'm scared of noise complaints. I hate going out with the trash and getting the mail. I feel like people are staring at me even when there's nobody there. I hate spending my days just looking at my computer. I don't have a job. I don't even know if I'm capable of working. The last time I tried I had to quit because I just couldn't do it even if I was only working part time. It was so exhausting and I'm scared that my life won't get better. I look forward to the future and getting older but I am so scared that things will stay the same. Its been the same for almost 3 years now.
I'm also scared that my mom don't like me anymore. I feel like I am to dependent on her. I always rely on her to go grocery shopping or do simple stuff like clothes shopping or going to the movies. I want to be independent but It's so hard. I remember when I was 18 I wanted to start a completely new life after high school. I tried to study film at the other side of the country. It just caused burnout. I wasted so much money, energy and time on it. I didn't even want to study anything after high school but my mom pressured me to at least study something so I would have a degree in something. The only thing I liked about living there is that no one knew me and I could just be anonymous when walking around. If I could have any super power it would be invisibility because I hate when people stare at me.
The only good things about my life now is my special interests. I love conlanging, austronesian/australian languages, the dutch language, merpeople, h2o just add water, mako mermaids, the bureau of magical things, the elephant princess, summer camp island, gravity falls, rick and morty, the new version of the little mermaid, dodie, siren (show), ghost rockers (tv show), conspiracy theories, world building, cooking, veganism, heartstopper, the owl house, amphibia, icon for hire, bring me the horizon, beabadoobee, pommelien thijs, froukje, tinne oltmans, poppy (singer), cosmic horror, the backrooms, lost in the hyperverse youtube channel, writing stories, filmmaking, singing. Even if I like all these things it's still hard to do participate in it sometimes. I can go months without doing any of it. I don't like it when I'm not writing. I feel the need to be productive but I don't have the energy. I want to be a screenwriter. I got so many ideas for stories but I'm never satisfied with them when I try to write anything down. And I'm scared of asking for advice because I feel like people will just make fun of me for my bad writing or my bad ideas or literally anything.
Sometimes I think I am okay but then I feel bad again. It's a constant cycle. I might feel good one week and the next I feel awful but sometimes the cycle is longer or shorter. I have spoken to both a psychiatrist and psychologist because of my autism diagnosis but I didn't really get the help I needed then. I didn't even feel comfortable enough to talk to them and I had to write a 5 page letter with all my thoughts and feelings but I still don't think they understood the severity of my bad health. Sometimes I wish my problems was seen as just as important as physical health. I wish that I had cancer or something visible that people could easily see. It's hard when it's invisible and some people don't understand that mental health is just as important.
Recently I rewatched Heartstopper and it makes me even more depressed. I love Heartstopper, the show and comic. It reminds me of a life I could never have. I want my life to be as easy as theirs. I want to fall in love. I want to have friends. I want to have people that care about my mental health. I know my mom probably cares about my mental health, but no one else. I don’t feel like I can talk to her about anything deeper than what’s on the surface. I hate how easy everything seems to other people even though it probably isn't. Even heartstopper who is supposed to be a lighthearted story, just makes me envious. Sometimes I don't even know if I am capable of falling in love. I know I'm queer and non binary, but it's just so hard to find anyone who would like me and someone who has similar interests. I did try do go on a date with a guy once but he only wanted sex. When we talked to each other on the dating app, he seemed nice and he liked some of the same things as me. I just wish I could fall in love with anyone at this point.
I haven't told anyone about some of the stuff in this post. I just don't want people to worry about me. I'm worried that if I tell people in my personal life then it will become worse. I have felt suicidal multiple times before. I just don't ever want to feel like that again. I hope this post makes sense. English isn't my first language. I don't know if I have anything more to say. If you read everything then thank you.
submitted by Acrobatic-Drop7158 to offmychest [link] [comments]
I'm 22 years old. I struggle with self harm. I am scared to tell my family. I know my mom will blame herself for not seeing it. it's been almost 8 years since I started. I was 14, almost 15 when I first started doing it. The last time I did it was 5 months ago, but I still get the urge sometimes. I think I'm spiraling into depression again. For the last few days I haven't been eating enough, but every time I look at food I just don't know what to eat because nothing sparks hunger. I drink a lot of water, orange juice and other things, so I know I'm not dehydrated. Sometimes I feel happy when I don't eat a lot of food. Because I want to lose weight. And it's nice to have one thing that I can control. I don't have anything else I can control. I don't feel tired when I lay down to sleep, but luckily I'm not struggling too much with falling asleep right now. It was way worse when I was in high school. I hate that it's summer now. It's so hot and the days are longer. I hate the expectation that you have to go out in the nice weather and have fun. It also doesn't help that I struggle with lots of sweating and because of my self harm scars I don't want to wear anything but long-sleeved clothes. It's hard to get out of bed when I wake up in the morning. I have woken up at 6 am almost every day, probably because of the sun and I just hate it. I try to sleep more but when I wake up again I start scrolling on my phone which can be hours.
I hate my life. I don't remember a time where I haven't hated my life. I grew up with an alcoholic dad. He could go long between drinking but when he drank it could last one day or up to a week. He never physically hurt me or anything but it made me feel lonely. Dad was there physically but not there emotionally. Sometimes I blame my mom for not leaving him. They're not married but it's also not easy to just move because of money issues and how expensive everything is. I don't live with them anymore. I don't really have contact with my dad anymore, only mom. I remember them arguing a lot and I am happy I don't have to witness that every day anymore. I also hate my dad for letting one of our dogs run away. I think I was 13 when it happened. He was out hunting with our dog and she did have a gps on her collar but apparently it didn't work and they couldn't find her again. She was just 5 or 6 years old. I still miss her. I also miss the first dog we had who died of cancer when she was 14. I think the cancer could have been avoided if my parents just fed her food she was supposed to have and not leftovers from their food. I'm scared for the current dog we got. I'm scared that she will become obese because she is always fed food she isn't supposed to have. They walk her a lot but that doesn't really help if she is fed too much food. I also remember being a kid and being scared of that one Bratz episode where Burdine force feeds this man until he dies. I remember being scared that my mom would die because she is overweight. She has always tried to lose weight but she has never been successful. I'm scared that my mom will die because I don't know what I will do without her.
When I was about 16 or 17, I sent nudes to a stranger online. Sometimes I'm scared that people will find out about it. I think the reason I did it was because I was so lonely. I had friends in high school at the time but I didn't feel included. I felt like I was the one person in our group that didn't belong. I just didn't feel like any of my friends cared about me. And I'm sure they believed I didn't care about them either. Because I had an argument with one of them about something stupid. She cried but I didn't cry and I have had so many dreams about it. It's been many years but I hate what I did. She was my best friend and I fucked it up. She was the first person I told about my self harm. When I told her, she made sure that I would be safe and she had me sleep over at her house that night. I will always be thankful for her.
I was never bullied in school, only teased a little bit but I didn't feel safe at school either. I was scared to tell teachers that I needed to pee and so I wet myself on multiple occasions. Embarrassing but it happened at least twice. I also did something very stupid when I was about 7 or 8. Someone in my year told me to do something and I did it because I was scared to say no. I got in trouble for doing it and I tried to tell the teachers that they forced me to do it but they didn't understand what I was trying to say and my mom grounded me. That didn't really do anything though. I also remember when I was 14 that I refused to play volleyball when my class was supposed to play. The teacher told all of us that we had to because no one in the class volunteered. I absolutely hated it because some of the boys in my year would always correct me whenever we played it in phys ed. Eventually the teacher told me that I could do something else and I got to help another teacher carry some chairs into a shed. I also remember the first time I hurt myself. I remember the exact date and I remember the following Monday in phys ed and I told the teacher I forgot my gym clothes and couldn't participate. I remember that after the class was done he tried to talk to me because he noticed something was off but he didn't dig deep enough for me to tell him what I had done. Sometimes I wonder if people I went to school with realised that I had hurt myself because I used to wear t shirts to phys ed but then suddenly just started wearing long sleeve shirts. Sometimes I even wonder if my mom secretly knows because I always wear long sleeve shirts.
I never knew I was autistic until I was about 20 years old. I am angry that no one saw it. I was the one that had to figure it out. My mom was told that I would just grow out of my "shy" nature. I wasn't shy, I was fucking anxious about everything. I was clearly struggling but no one helped me. I remember when I was about 13 years old, the school nurse was worried about me because I was alone during recess and got me to talk to this woman. I had friends but I also liked to be alone. I don't know what exactly the woman worked as but I remember the book we used in sessions had the words cognitive behaviour therapy on it. No one told me why I had to see this woman. how can you expect to help a child when the child doesn't even know why they're there to begin with or the child doesn't even know they apparently need help. One day the sessions just stopped and that was that. Nothing came out of it and it didn't help. The only thing I'm grateful for is that she suggested that I participate in an after school activity. I joined a choir and was there until I was 18. I loved singing in the choir, I also got to sing some solo songs too but I never got any friends out of it. I just showed up to all the practices and performances but never felt comfortable enough to make friends.
When I was in first grade, I got diagnosed with dyslexia which I have always thought was wrong. And even one of my teachers in school never even knew I had the diagnosis and she didn't notice anything. Is it possible that they misdiagnosed me with dyslexia instead of autism? It has just never been a diagnosis I identified with. Autism is different though. I got the diagnosis when I was 20 and I know it fits me. I just don't feel like I belong with other autistic people. There are so many things that don't fit me or I just don't experience but is apparently something "all" other autistic people seem to struggle with. I'm tired of not feeling like I belong anywhere. I don't even feel safe in my own apartment. I hate the placement of the living room windows and I hate the tiny space between the counter and stove. I hate that I can hear every fucking time someone uses the bathroom. When I'm in the shower it feels like everyone can hear that I am in the shower. I'm scared to wash my clothes because the washing machine is loud and I'm scared of noise complaints. I hate going out with the trash and getting the mail. I feel like people are staring at me even when there's nobody there. I hate spending my days just looking at my computer. I don't have a job. I don't even know if I'm capable of working. The last time I tried I had to quit because I just couldn't do it even if I was only working part time. It was so exhausting and I'm scared that my life won't get better. I look forward to the future and getting older but I am so scared that things will stay the same. Its been the same for almost 3 years now.
I'm also scared that my mom don't like me anymore. I feel like I am to dependent on her. I always rely on her to go grocery shopping or do simple stuff like clothes shopping or going to the movies. I want to be independent but It's so hard. I remember when I was 18 I wanted to start a completely new life after high school. I tried to study film at the other side of the country. It just caused burnout. I wasted so much money, energy and time on it. I didn't even want to study anything after high school but my mom pressured me to at least study something so I would have a degree in something. The only thing I liked about living there is that no one knew me and I could just be anonymous when walking around. If I could have any super power it would be invisibility because I hate when people stare at me.
The only good things about my life now is my special interests. I love conlanging, austronesian/australian languages, the dutch language, merpeople, h2o just add water, mako mermaids, the bureau of magical things, the elephant princess, summer camp island, gravity falls, rick and morty, the new version of the little mermaid, dodie, siren (show), ghost rockers (tv show), conspiracy theories, world building, cooking, veganism, heartstopper, the owl house, amphibia, icon for hire, bring me the horizon, beabadoobee, pommelien thijs, froukje, tinne oltmans, poppy (singer), cosmic horror, the backrooms, lost in the hyperverse youtube channel, writing stories, filmmaking, singing. Even if I like all these things it's still hard to do participate in it sometimes. I can go months without doing any of it. I don't like it when I'm not writing. I feel the need to be productive but I don't have the energy. I want to be a screenwriter. I got so many ideas for stories but I'm never satisfied with them when I try to write anything down. And I'm scared of asking for advice because I feel like people will just make fun of me for my bad writing or my bad ideas or literally anything.
Sometimes I think I am okay but then I feel bad again. It's a constant cycle. I might feel good one week and the next I feel awful but sometimes the cycle is longer or shorter. I have spoken to both a psychiatrist and psychologist because of my autism diagnosis but I didn't really get the help I needed then. I didn't even feel comfortable enough to talk to them and I had to write a 5 page letter with all my thoughts and feelings but I still don't think they understood the severity of my bad health. Sometimes I wish my problems was seen as just as important as physical health. I wish that I had cancer or something visible that people could easily see. It's hard when it's invisible and some people don't understand that mental health is just as important.
Recently I rewatched Heartstopper and it makes me even more depressed. I love Heartstopper, the show and comic. It reminds me of a life I could never have. I want my life to be as easy as theirs. I want to fall in love. I want to have friends. I want to have people that care about my mental health. I know my mom probably cares about my mental health, but no one else. I don’t feel like I can talk to her about anything deeper than what’s on the surface. I hate how easy everything seems to other people even though it probably isn't. Even heartstopper who is supposed to be a lighthearted story, just makes me envious. Sometimes I don't even know if I am capable of falling in love. I know I'm queer and non binary, but it's just so hard to find anyone who would like me and someone who has similar interests. I did try do go on a date with a guy once but he only wanted sex. When we talked to each other on the dating app, he seemed nice and he liked some of the same things as me. I just wish I could fall in love with anyone at this point.
I haven't told anyone about some of the stuff in this post. I just don't want people to worry about me. I'm worried that if I tell people in my personal life then it will become worse. I have felt suicidal multiple times before. I just don't ever want to feel like that again. I hope this post makes sense. English isn't my first language. I don't know if I have anything more to say. If you read everything then thank you.
2023.06.09 13:07 LuckyBoy1992 Colour Grading: An Underrated Factor in the Decline of Cinema
Almost every film released in the last two decades has been, to some degree, subjected to teal/orange colour grading, wherein these two colours are unnaturally dominant and obnoxiously vibrant. This subdues and cancels out other colours. Greens always have too much yellow in them, vegetation appears to be dying, skin tones appear jaundiced, and a toxic blue hue appears wherever there are shadows or low light. I first noticed the colour grading phenomenon in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in 2004, which is plagued by an abundance of teal and selective desaturation. Since then, things have only gotten worse, with countless muted, tinted, and washed-out movies and TV shows having been produced. The earliest complaints about colour grading first appeared on internet message boards in 2008, yet it has continued to the present and shows no signs of abating. In the late 2000s, the equally awful desaturation trend was unleashed, which has also continued to the present.
After half a century of enjoying luscious colour films without complaint, we suddenly found ourselves limited to teal/orange on the one hand, or a world greyed-out and drained of colour on the other. Unfortunately, there is now a generation who have grown up with this and have become acclimatised to it over the last 20 years. Naturally saturated colours are bizarre to them, because their palette has been artificially restricted for so long. I suspect these dull, desaturated hues are used to inculcate a depressive passivity in the audience, via what is essentially a form of sensory deprivation. It bears all the hallmarks of an insidious social experiment, much like those the Soviets used to conduct. With relentless exposure, the abnormal eventually becomes normal. It is an exercise in psychological abuse. Qualitatively, these trends are unpleasant, yet they have been pushed with a zeal that borders on cultish. We prefer colours the way they naturally are, because that is the default, and it is not incumbent upon us to justify normality. It is upon those who would deviate from it.
When I investigated the supposed “science” behind the teal/orange colour theory, I was shocked by how poorly reasoned it was. It begins with the claim that because teal and orange are on opposite sides of the colour wheel, they are complimentary. While they do create contrast, being cool and warm respectively, I cannot say they look good together, especially not when applied to people and their surrounding environment. Garish and nauseating, it evokes the fluorescent lighting of a dingy bar or nightclub. Why would anyone want to reduce the colour palette of our visual experience to two colours? In reality, humans are not orange. In reality, shadows and highlights are not teal. We don't see the world in monochrome, and thank heavens we don't. It would be incredibly depressing if we did. So why has the Heinz aesthetic, as I call it, set the standard for colourists around the world? It is claimed that it helps characters stand out from their surroundings, but who in their right mind believes we need people and their surroundings to be colour coded so we can tell them apart?
Another absurd claim is that colour grading creates atmosphere and enhances the story. This is patently false. The careers of Hitchcock, Kubrick, Spielberg, and innumerable others predate colour grading, and they never needed it to create their masterpieces. Colour grading is a gimmick used by talentless hacks to compensate for bad screenwriting, bad directing, and bad acting. It did not exist before the mid-2000s, yet its advocates talk about it as if it were a staff of life. I would be willing to listen to the so-called experts, but seeing as they have so thoroughly bought into the colour grading lunacy, I have no respect for them. It is very much an “emperor's new clothes” phenomenon. I have avoided going to the movies since 2007, when I couldn't stand the ugly colours any longer. 15 years later, it still hasn't run out of steam. It is clear to me that we are dealing with ideologues. Anyone who desires to see everything in two-tone can indulge this mania in their own home with an interior decorator. It should not be forced upon the rest of us, which it has been, since we were never consulted. It has been accomplished in a clandestine fashion, and the perpetrators are utterly unaccountable.
Harry Potter is an example of a franchise that was ruined by both teal/orange and desaturation. Only the first two films looked normal, but they were retroactively given a desaturated grade on the 4K blu-rays to match the drab palette of the later films. Apparently it's not enough for Hollywood that every new movie looks awful. They have to go back and desecrate the past, to erase any evidence that there was once a time of normality. Those who have been made aware of the colour grading phenomenon confess that something about the newer films they were watching didn't seem right, but they weren't sure what it was. Initially shocked by their own obliviousness to such an obvious visual aberration, they inevitably come to regret their newfound awareness, because they now notice it everywhere. While it can vary in the intensity of its application, the effect is always the same. It's an assault on the senses that has been waged relentlessly.
I will conclude by saying that the postmodern tactic of invoking subjectivity to derail any truth claim has become increasingly threadbare, and I for one am sick to death of it. I can talk at length about valence and metaphysical properties, but I would prefer that this not descend into a deep philosophical discussion. I dread the debates that this inevitably stirs up, since I know it cannot be empirically verified that certain colours look good together and others do not. It can only be reasoned, because we're talking about metaphysics. Common sense is therefore at a disadvantage, and social engineers relish this. Should we be forced to eat excrement just because we can't prove it tastes vile? Insufferable postmodern “intellectuals” seem to think so.
submitted by LuckyBoy1992 to Filmmakers [link] [comments]
After half a century of enjoying luscious colour films without complaint, we suddenly found ourselves limited to teal/orange on the one hand, or a world greyed-out and drained of colour on the other. Unfortunately, there is now a generation who have grown up with this and have become acclimatised to it over the last 20 years. Naturally saturated colours are bizarre to them, because their palette has been artificially restricted for so long. I suspect these dull, desaturated hues are used to inculcate a depressive passivity in the audience, via what is essentially a form of sensory deprivation. It bears all the hallmarks of an insidious social experiment, much like those the Soviets used to conduct. With relentless exposure, the abnormal eventually becomes normal. It is an exercise in psychological abuse. Qualitatively, these trends are unpleasant, yet they have been pushed with a zeal that borders on cultish. We prefer colours the way they naturally are, because that is the default, and it is not incumbent upon us to justify normality. It is upon those who would deviate from it.
When I investigated the supposed “science” behind the teal/orange colour theory, I was shocked by how poorly reasoned it was. It begins with the claim that because teal and orange are on opposite sides of the colour wheel, they are complimentary. While they do create contrast, being cool and warm respectively, I cannot say they look good together, especially not when applied to people and their surrounding environment. Garish and nauseating, it evokes the fluorescent lighting of a dingy bar or nightclub. Why would anyone want to reduce the colour palette of our visual experience to two colours? In reality, humans are not orange. In reality, shadows and highlights are not teal. We don't see the world in monochrome, and thank heavens we don't. It would be incredibly depressing if we did. So why has the Heinz aesthetic, as I call it, set the standard for colourists around the world? It is claimed that it helps characters stand out from their surroundings, but who in their right mind believes we need people and their surroundings to be colour coded so we can tell them apart?
Another absurd claim is that colour grading creates atmosphere and enhances the story. This is patently false. The careers of Hitchcock, Kubrick, Spielberg, and innumerable others predate colour grading, and they never needed it to create their masterpieces. Colour grading is a gimmick used by talentless hacks to compensate for bad screenwriting, bad directing, and bad acting. It did not exist before the mid-2000s, yet its advocates talk about it as if it were a staff of life. I would be willing to listen to the so-called experts, but seeing as they have so thoroughly bought into the colour grading lunacy, I have no respect for them. It is very much an “emperor's new clothes” phenomenon. I have avoided going to the movies since 2007, when I couldn't stand the ugly colours any longer. 15 years later, it still hasn't run out of steam. It is clear to me that we are dealing with ideologues. Anyone who desires to see everything in two-tone can indulge this mania in their own home with an interior decorator. It should not be forced upon the rest of us, which it has been, since we were never consulted. It has been accomplished in a clandestine fashion, and the perpetrators are utterly unaccountable.
Harry Potter is an example of a franchise that was ruined by both teal/orange and desaturation. Only the first two films looked normal, but they were retroactively given a desaturated grade on the 4K blu-rays to match the drab palette of the later films. Apparently it's not enough for Hollywood that every new movie looks awful. They have to go back and desecrate the past, to erase any evidence that there was once a time of normality. Those who have been made aware of the colour grading phenomenon confess that something about the newer films they were watching didn't seem right, but they weren't sure what it was. Initially shocked by their own obliviousness to such an obvious visual aberration, they inevitably come to regret their newfound awareness, because they now notice it everywhere. While it can vary in the intensity of its application, the effect is always the same. It's an assault on the senses that has been waged relentlessly.
I will conclude by saying that the postmodern tactic of invoking subjectivity to derail any truth claim has become increasingly threadbare, and I for one am sick to death of it. I can talk at length about valence and metaphysical properties, but I would prefer that this not descend into a deep philosophical discussion. I dread the debates that this inevitably stirs up, since I know it cannot be empirically verified that certain colours look good together and others do not. It can only be reasoned, because we're talking about metaphysics. Common sense is therefore at a disadvantage, and social engineers relish this. Should we be forced to eat excrement just because we can't prove it tastes vile? Insufferable postmodern “intellectuals” seem to think so.
2023.06.09 12:21 PANDAmenic2089 Channel Orange turns 11 tomorrow. Praying for a vinyl, if nothing…there is no god
Like seriously, just do it already.
submitted by PANDAmenic2089 to FrankOcean [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 10:21 VividChange99 theory for the orange boy
there's been two cases of the word paranoid being abruptly cut off
but we still don't have a finite answer for Logan's dark side and seeing as paranoia makes you act irrationally it would make a good antithesis to the logical side
if Logan is aware of this darker side implied by
and even based on the other dark sides it makes sense lies are dark morally, intrusive thought is dark imagination, and paranoia is a dark logical spiral
submitted by VividChange99 to SandersSides [link] [comments]
Roman: "Parino-vigilant I just made that word up right now I'm basically Shakespeare"most people think this is Virgil being Paranoia as a dark side but Virgil has been seen as a morally gray side and I doubt we're getting Virgil back on the dark side
Logan: "You're just para!-expressing an unhealthy amount of concern"
but we still don't have a finite answer for Logan's dark side and seeing as paranoia makes you act irrationally it would make a good antithesis to the logical side
if Logan is aware of this darker side implied by
Remus: "who do you really want to scream that at?" in a Sanders Asidesit would make sense Logan wouldn't want the word paranoid to be used hence why he cut himself off as well
and even based on the other dark sides it makes sense lies are dark morally, intrusive thought is dark imagination, and paranoia is a dark logical spiral
2023.06.09 08:29 Adam-best Electrical Hip Muscle Stimulator
Want to feel confident again in your favorite dress? Ever feel like no matter how hard you train, your booty just doesn't seem to show results? The Electrical Hip Muscle Stimulator solves this problem for you instantly!
https://zafyn.com/collections/new-products/products/electrical-hip-muscle-stimulator
https://reddit.com/link/144xe4h/video/hu6xu6ejol261/player
This allows you to train your booty and lower bodyeffectively from the comfort of your own home. It uses electrical muscle stimulation to promote muscle movement, scientifically proven to tighten your musclesto help achieve that perfect figure.
submitted by Adam-best to McrOne [link] [comments]
https://zafyn.com/collections/new-products/products/electrical-hip-muscle-stimulator
https://reddit.com/link/144xe4h/video/hu6xu6ejol261/player
This allows you to train your booty and lower bodyeffectively from the comfort of your own home. It uses electrical muscle stimulation to promote muscle movement, scientifically proven to tighten your musclesto help achieve that perfect figure.
Highlights:
- Electronic muscle stimulation: stimulate the hip and gluteal muscles and help to tone, tighten and firm your hips and buttocks to achieve the body that you’ve always wanted
- Exercise anytime: provide endless possibilities in training your booty like in front of the TV, when doing the dishes, or even when cooking
- U-shaped design: ergonomic pads cover targeted regions in the buttocks to stimulate nerves where they are most concentrated
- Cost-effective: save time and money on expensive gym subscriptions and allow you the convenience of getting amazing results without tiring workouts
- You only need to train for 15-20 minutes/day to get that noticeable improvement in just 4 weeks
- Easy to use push-button operation with 6 modes and 10 intensity levels
- With a push of a button, you can adjust the intensity of the stimulation and go about with your daily activities
- 100% skin-friendly and pain-free
Specifications:
- Material: PU
- Power Source: 2 x AAA batteries (not included)
- Certificate: CE/EMC, ROHS-certified
- Color: Black & Orange
- Size: Approximately 260mm x 188mm x 12.8mm
Package Includes:
- 1 x Electrical Hip Muscle Stimulator with Reuseable Gel Pads
- 1 Set of Reusable Gel Pad Replacement
2023.06.09 07:22 Hemeralopic Streak 213 - A poem
Hi! I would like to translate one of my poems in English.
Asher
After targeting the yellow, archer Asher
Walks to the market square which is in the center
He buys a small orange saop which fits on one hand
Melon is its fragance, now he walks in the land.
A curtain of noise is made by the cicadas
On pale leaves, the sunshine, that sheds lights, what it does
Makes Asher fleeing at the shadow, closing his eyes.
He opens them, he is a little older: nice!
Tricolor laurel, flowers in red, pink and white
Indulge in insects with a slow and quiet flight
Asher folds his eyes, and as a certain landmark
This biscornu fruity tree, with thin trunk in dark
He runs in order to having the little train
But he does not suceed, and he claims without pain
"If this is the worst thing that can happen to me,
That means I don't fear nothing and I am happy".
See you tomorrow!
submitted by Hemeralopic to WriteStreakEN [link] [comments]
Asher
After targeting the yellow, archer Asher
Walks to the market square which is in the center
He buys a small orange saop which fits on one hand
Melon is its fragance, now he walks in the land.
A curtain of noise is made by the cicadas
On pale leaves, the sunshine, that sheds lights, what it does
Makes Asher fleeing at the shadow, closing his eyes.
He opens them, he is a little older: nice!
Tricolor laurel, flowers in red, pink and white
Indulge in insects with a slow and quiet flight
Asher folds his eyes, and as a certain landmark
This biscornu fruity tree, with thin trunk in dark
He runs in order to having the little train
But he does not suceed, and he claims without pain
"If this is the worst thing that can happen to me,
That means I don't fear nothing and I am happy".
See you tomorrow!
2023.06.09 06:19 transcribersofreddit me_irl Image "Me_irl"
 | submitted by transcribersofreddit to TranscribersOfReddit [link] [comments] |
2023.06.09 06:18 greenexgxn Buy Post Workout Drink to Get Ready for Extreme Training
 | https://preview.redd.it/hknhkt915x4b1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=f0c427128974f3d83d49558508cd0b11cd59fc62 submitted by greenexgxn to u/greenexgxn [link] [comments] Post Workout Drink is the right option while you start workout at extreme note. It reduces muscle soreness, fatigue and enhances stamina for specific training sessions. Post Workout Drink is unique and metabolised within muscles itself. If you want to push ahead training growth then buy it now. |
2023.06.09 05:54 humblygirl I can’t just have “one” of anything
Weather it’s a cookie, bowl of cereal, piece of candy, cake etc. especially if it’s my favorite type of said food. What do I do? How do I know if I have BED? I recently bought cookie butter and ate the entire jar in one day. Which was likely over 1k calories in one jar. I feel lost and upset. I always think about food. Somehow I’m not severely unhealthy in general- I do workout and eat fairly healthy besides said binges, but I can’t keep living this way. I always stay I’ll start Monday- or tomorrow.
submitted by humblygirl to BingeEatingDisorder [link] [comments]
2023.06.09 05:22 TRAE-is-Alastor MD ep 5 theory:
Well, I normally only post Designation: Death but… I gotta quickly pump this theory out so that the episode tomorrow will prove me wrong.
The recent image of a crow with AbsoluteSolver has given me a mild theory.
I think that AbsoluteSolver can be used to reprogram even organic matter and genetic creatures for work, showing in birds.
I predict that these birds with AS lead to the discovery of Cyn and the development of AbsoluteSolver based systems in Murder Drones(note, I disagree with the general consensus that the fourth drone is Cyn, I still believe that Cyn is the full AbsoluteSolver)
I think that the AbsoluteSolver is something older than JCJenson that they didn’t create, and I think that the fourth drone probably got the AbsoluteSolver by chance and ended up becoming a Zombie Drone from it.
After that, I think that leads to the creation of N. I think they found a similar way to utilize AS technology in Murder Drones without creating Zombie Drones and instead skipping straight to turning them into Murder Drones(I do however believe that Zombie Drones serve as an intermission phase caused by having the AbsoluteSolver that serves as a transition state between Worker Drone and Murder Drone(off top but the Reddit lag is real. I’m typing several sentences before they start to show up. On phone of all things.
I think that this fourth Worker Drone became Serial Designation S, who was alluded to in ep 4.
I think that this episode will focus on building up the mystery of S as an AS user, but I don’t think they’re going to fully explain it because this mystery is gigantic and we’ve seen how many more questions Liam can give us while giving his answers.
Welp, I’m ready for my theory to be debunked horribly in the episode lol..
Everyone else, enjoy the episode and I hope my weird and unpopular interpretation of Cyn’s identity as well as that my general theory would be good food for thought or mildly entertaining
submitted by TRAE-is-Alastor to MurderDrones [link] [comments]
The recent image of a crow with AbsoluteSolver has given me a mild theory.
I think that AbsoluteSolver can be used to reprogram even organic matter and genetic creatures for work, showing in birds.
I predict that these birds with AS lead to the discovery of Cyn and the development of AbsoluteSolver based systems in Murder Drones(note, I disagree with the general consensus that the fourth drone is Cyn, I still believe that Cyn is the full AbsoluteSolver)
I think that the AbsoluteSolver is something older than JCJenson that they didn’t create, and I think that the fourth drone probably got the AbsoluteSolver by chance and ended up becoming a Zombie Drone from it.
After that, I think that leads to the creation of N. I think they found a similar way to utilize AS technology in Murder Drones without creating Zombie Drones and instead skipping straight to turning them into Murder Drones(I do however believe that Zombie Drones serve as an intermission phase caused by having the AbsoluteSolver that serves as a transition state between Worker Drone and Murder Drone(off top but the Reddit lag is real. I’m typing several sentences before they start to show up. On phone of all things.
I think that this fourth Worker Drone became Serial Designation S, who was alluded to in ep 4.
I think that this episode will focus on building up the mystery of S as an AS user, but I don’t think they’re going to fully explain it because this mystery is gigantic and we’ve seen how many more questions Liam can give us while giving his answers.
Welp, I’m ready for my theory to be debunked horribly in the episode lol..
Everyone else, enjoy the episode and I hope my weird and unpopular interpretation of Cyn’s identity as well as that my general theory would be good food for thought or mildly entertaining
2023.06.09 04:35 tacorwin [PC] [H] Anything Listed Below [W] Credits to Purchase Rocket Pass
This post was updated on 06/08/2023 at 22:34:49.
I am looking to trade anything in my inventory until I reach enough credits to get Rocket Pass this season. Check the timestamp above for when this post was last updated.
submitted by tacorwin to RocketLeagueExchange [link] [comments]
I am looking to trade anything in my inventory until I reach enough credits to get Rocket Pass this season. Check the timestamp above for when this post was last updated.
Body Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Backfire | Common | None | None |
| Centio | Import | None | None |
| Dominus | Common | None | None |
| Emperor | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Emperor | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Emperor II | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Emperor II | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Emperor II: Frozen | Limited | None | None |
| Emperor II: Scorched | Limited | None | None |
| Gizmo | Common | None | None |
| Honda Civic Type R | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Honda Civic Type R | Limited | Orange | None |
| Honda Civic Type R | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Hotshot | Common | None | None |
| Maestro | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Maestro | Limited | Lime | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | Orange | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | Purple | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | Lime | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Nexus SC | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Nomad GXT | Limited | Grey | None |
| Nomad GXT | Limited | Pink | None |
| Nomad GXT | Limited | Purple | None |
| Nomad GXT | Limited | Lime | None |
| Nomad GXT | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Outlaw GXT | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Road Hog | Common | None | None |
| Takumi | VeryRare | None | None |
| Tyranno GXT | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Tyranno GXT | Limited | Grey | None |
| Tyranno GXT | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Venom | Common | None | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI | Limited | Grey | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI | Limited | Purple | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI | Limited | Lime | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI RLE | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI RLE | Limited | Purple | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI RLE | Limited | Pink | None |
| Volkswagen Golf GTI RLE | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| X-Devil | Common | None | None |
AnimatedDecal Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cityscape | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Cityscape | Limited | Lime | None |
| Constella | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Constella | Limited | Purple | None |
| Dominus: RLCS 2021-22 | Limited | None | Victor |
| Dominus: RLCS 2021-22 | Limited | None | None |
| Filiformer | Limited | Grey | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | Orange | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | Grey | None |
| Flame-Lane | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | Orange | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | Black | None |
| Fuzzee | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Haphazard | Limited | Pink | None |
| Haphazard | Limited | Black | None |
| Haphazard | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Honda Civic Type R: Wrapstar: Remixed | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Honda Civic Type R: Wrapstar: Remixed | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Lunation | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Lunation | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Lunation | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Neural Network | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Neural Network | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | Orange | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | Pink | None |
| Nomad: Blinkpad | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Octane: Wrapstar: Remixed | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Octane: Wrapstar: Remixed | Limited | Lime | None |
| Octane: Wrapstar: Remixed | Limited | Purple | None |
| Sandscape | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Sandscape | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Sandscape | Limited | Purple | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Pink | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Purple | None |
| Screentone | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Lime | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Grey | None |
| Screentone | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Sharpstorm | Limited | Orange | None |
| Sharpstorm | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Spotdrop | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Spotdrop | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Spotdrop | Limited | Pink | None |
| Spotdrop | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Starpower | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Starpower | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Starpower | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Starpower | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Starpower | Limited | Orange | None |
| Starpower | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Starpower | Limited | Grey | None |
| Starpower | Limited | Purple | None |
| Starpower | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Streamix | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Streamix | Limited | Grey | None |
| Streamix | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| SYNgineer | Limited | Orange | None |
| SYNgineer | Limited | Purple | None |
| SYNgineer | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Thawed | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Thawed | Limited | Grey | None |
| Vaticinator | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Vaticinator | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Wet Paint | BlackMarket | None | None |
| Xtra | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Xtra | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Xtra | Limited | Purple | None |
| Xtra | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
Decal Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Aftershock: Clipper | Limited | None | None |
| Backfire: Checkers | Limited | None | None |
| Backfire: Cruster Buster | Limited | None | None |
| Backfire: Greatgrid | Limited | None | None |
| Breakout: King Monke | Limited | None | None |
| Dingo: Rascal Stripes | Rare | None | None |
| Dominus: Razerwing | Limited | None | None |
| Dominus: Stratum Badge | Limited | None | None |
| Harbinger: Quickline | Limited | None | None |
| Octane: Dragon Slayer | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Octane: Dragon Slayer | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Octane: Krush | Limited | None | None |
| Octane: Krush | Limited | None | None |
| Octane: RL Esports 2022 | Limited | None | None |
| Octane: RL Esports 2022 | Limited | None | None |
| Peregrine TT: Mechwing | Limited | None | None |
| Road Hog: Watermelon | Limited | None | None |
| Takumi: Sizzled | Limited | None | None |
PaintFinish Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Chipboard | Limited | None | None |
| Corroded Metal | Common | None | None |
| Denim | Limited | None | None |
| Fiberboard | Limited | None | None |
| Matte | Common | None | None |
| Metallic | Common | None | None |
| Nacho | Limited | None | None |
| Semigloss | Common | None | None |
| Windowed | Limited | None | None |
Wheels Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3-Lobe: Infinite | Limited | Orange | None |
| 8-Ball | Limited | None | None |
| A-Lister: Inverted | Limited | Saffron | None |
| ANDR01D | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Artifice | Limited | Black | None |
| Artifice | Limited | Purple | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | Grey | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | Lime | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Artifuss: Hatch | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Barbershop | Limited | None | None |
| Bender | Common | None | None |
| Bloomer | Limited | Grey | None |
| Bloomer | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Bloomer | Limited | Orange | None |
| Boost Boot | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Boost Boot | Limited | Grey | None |
| Boost Boot: Inverted | Limited | Lime | None |
| Boost Boot: Inverted | Limited | Grey | None |
| Buckboard | Limited | None | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | Purple | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | Black | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | Lime | None |
| Cooperduper: Glitched | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| DevCon | Limited | Saffron | None |
| DevCon | Limited | Lime | None |
| Dey KC | VeryRare | None | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | Purple | None |
| Disc-bliss | Limited | Orange | None |
| Dynasty | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Dynasty | Limited | Black | None |
| Dynasty | Limited | Lime | None |
| Emerald | Limited | None | None |
| Emerald | Limited | None | None |
| Emerald | Limited | None | None |
| Emerald | Limited | None | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Enjin | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Lime | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Orange | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Purple | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Black | None |
| Enjin | Limited | Pink | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Black | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Purple | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Pink | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Orange | None |
| Enjin: Roasted | Limited | Lime | None |
| Falco | Common | None | None |
| Floret | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Floret | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Floret | Limited | Lime | None |
| Floret | Limited | Black | None |
| Floret: Infinite | Limited | Black | None |
| Floret: Infinite | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Floret: Infinite | Limited | Purple | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Lime | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Grey | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Purple | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Lime | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Pink | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Purple | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Forerunner | Limited | Black | None |
| Forerunner: Roasted | Limited | Grey | None |
| Forerunner: Roasted | Limited | Black | None |
| Forerunner: Roasted | Limited | Black | None |
| Forerunner: Roasted | Limited | Lime | None |
| Founder | Limited | Orange | None |
| Founder | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Founder | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Franko Fone | Limited | Orange | None |
| Franko Fone | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Franko Fone | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Franko Fone: Inverted | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Franko Fone: Inverted | Limited | Lime | None |
| FSL | Import | None | None |
| Gadabout: Inverted | Limited | Grey | None |
| Gadabout: Inverted | Limited | Lime | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | Orange | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | Purple | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | Grey | None |
| Glonex: Holographic | Limited | Lime | None |
| Good Fortune | Limited | None | None |
| Green Machine | Limited | Purple | None |
| Green Machine | Limited | Orange | None |
| Green Machine | Limited | Black | None |
| Haunted Hoss | Limited | Purple | None |
| Invader | Common | None | None |
| Marauder | Rare | None | None |
| Maz | Limited | Lime | None |
| Maz | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Maz: Holographic | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Maz: Holographic | Limited | Pink | None |
| Module | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Module | Limited | Purple | None |
| Module | Limited | Lime | None |
| Module: Roasted | Limited | Pink | None |
| Module: Roasted | Limited | Lime | None |
| Ninja | Limited | None | None |
| Nomster | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Nomster | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Nomster | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Black | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Grey | None |
| Piercer | Limited | Purple | None |
| Piercer | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Piercer: Crystalized | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Piercer: Crystalized | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Piercer: Crystalized | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | Pink | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | Purple | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Pulpo | Limited | Orange | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | Grey | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | Orange | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Pulpo: Infinite | Limited | Pink | None |
| Rival | Limited | Orange | None |
| Rival | Limited | None | None |
| Rival: Radiant | Limited | None | None |
| RL Esports 2022 | Limited | None | None |
| Rocko | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Rocko | Limited | Lime | None |
| Roeler | Limited | None | None |
| Ruinator | Limited | Black | None |
| Ruinator | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Ruinator: Inverted | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Ruinator: Inverted | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Scarab | Rare | None | None |
| School'd | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| School'd | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| School'd | Limited | Black | None |
| Starcade | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Starcade | Limited | Grey | None |
| Starcade | Limited | Purple | None |
| Starcade | Limited | Orange | None |
| Stern | Common | None | None |
| String Theory | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Synastry | Limited | Grey | None |
| Synastry | Limited | Lime | None |
| Synastry | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Tanker | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Tanker | Limited | Purple | None |
| Tanker: Infinite | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Tanker: Infinite | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Throned | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Throned | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Throned | Limited | Black | None |
| Throned | Limited | Purple | None |
| Throned | Limited | Grey | None |
| Throned | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Throned | Limited | Pink | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | Orange | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | Black | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Throned: Sacred | Limited | Purple | None |
| Tic-King | Limited | Grey | None |
| Tic-King | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Tic-King: Glitched | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Torque TX: Inverted | Limited | Purple | None |
| Torque TX: Inverted | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Torque TX: Inverted | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Traction: Hatch | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Twista: Inverted | Limited | None | None |
| Veski | Limited | Orange | None |
| Veski | Limited | Black | None |
| Veski: Inverted | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Veski: Inverted | Limited | Purple | None |
| Vortex | Common | None | None |
| Whisperer | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Y.O.U. | Limited | Pink | None |
| Y.O.U. | Limited | Orange | None |
| Y.O.U. | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Y.O.U. | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Y.O.U. | Limited | Purple | None |
| Yolky | Limited | None | None |
| Yolky | Limited | None | None |
RocketBoost Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Bubbles | Common | None | None |
| Chequered Flag | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Chequered Flag | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Orange | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Lime | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Grey | None |
| Corbital | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Purple | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Pink | None |
| Diecast Spark | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | Orange | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | Grey | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | Orange | None |
| Elemental | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Elemental | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Flamethrower | Common | None | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | Pink | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | Orange | None |
| Hazy Flame | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Lantern Lift | Limited | None | None |
| Mandala | Limited | Purple | None |
| Mandala | Limited | Grey | None |
| Mandala | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Nuts & Bolts | Rare | None | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | Pink | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | Black | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Phase-R | Limited | Grey | None |
| Popcorn | Limited | None | None |
| Popcorn | Limited | None | None |
| Sparkles | Uncommon | None | None |
| Sprattle | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Sprattle | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Timeline | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Timeline | Limited | Orange | None |
| Toon Smoke | VeryRare | None | None |
Topper Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Alicorn | Limited | None | None |
| Alpinist | Limited | None | None |
| AquaDome Buoy | Limited | None | None |
| Baby Turtle | Limited | None | None |
| Baby Turtle | Limited | None | None |
| Cheeseburger | Limited | None | None |
| Cow Skull | Uncommon | None | None |
| Crispy Turkey | Limited | None | None |
| Crispy Turkey | Limited | None | None |
| Cutlass | Limited | None | None |
| Excavator | Limited | None | None |
| Fat Stacks | Limited | None | None |
| Gamepiece | Limited | None | None |
| Happy Whale | Limited | None | None |
| Jester | Limited | None | None |
| Jupiter | Limited | None | None |
| Lunchbox - Esper | Limited | None | None |
| Lunchbox - Esper | Limited | None | None |
| Manta Ray | Limited | None | None |
| Prickly Cactus | Limited | None | None |
| Royal Crown | Common | None | None |
| Salty Peanut | Limited | None | None |
| Tickled Tomato | Limited | None | None |
Antenna Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Chocolate Chip | Limited | None | None |
| Crescent Moon | Limited | None | None |
| Crescent Moon | Limited | None | None |
| Fish Fly | Limited | None | None |
| Green Leaf | Limited | None | None |
| Lucky Ladybug | Limited | None | None |
| Mr. Carrot | Limited | None | None |
| Radiohead | Limited | None | None |
| Skull | Common | None | None |
| Smiley | Common | None | None |
| Soccer Ball | Common | None | None |
| Thermometer | Limited | None | None |
| Thermometer | Limited | None | None |
GoalExplosion Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Cosmosis | Limited | Pink | None |
| Elemental | Limited | Grey | None |
| Elemental | Limited | Lime | None |
| Elemental | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Light Show | Limited | Lime | None |
| Lotus Bloom | Limited | Lime | None |
| Lotus Bloom | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Lotus Bloom | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Meta-Blast | Limited | Lime | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Lime | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Grey | None |
| Nomster | Limited | Orange | None |
| Rad Rock | Limited | Orange | None |
| Riser | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Riser | Limited | ForestGreen | Scorer |
| Riser | Limited | Lime | None |
| Savage Spray | Limited | Lime | None |
| Savage Spray | Limited | Orange | None |
| Savage Spray | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Shield Breaker | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Shield Breaker | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Spatial Rift | Limited | Saffron | Acrobat |
| Yeehaw | Limited | Purple | None |
| Yeehaw | Limited | Lime | None |
Trail Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Corbital | Limited | Grey | None |
| Corbital | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Crimson | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Pink | None |
| Corbital | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Corbital | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Dimensionator | Limited | Black | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | Grey | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | Cobalt | None |
| Dream Beam | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Elemental | Limited | Purple | None |
| Elemental | Limited | SkyBlue | None |
| Flame Chain | Limited | Saffron | None |
| Flame Chain | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Sprattle | Limited | Pink | None |
| Sprattle | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Tarnation | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Tarnation | Limited | Grey | None |
| Twisty-Sweet | Limited | None | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | BurntSienna | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | Orange | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | ForestGreen | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | TitaniumWhite | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | Black | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | Lime | None |
| Warp Wave | Limited | Purple | None |
PlayerBanner Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Aquarium | Limited | None | None |
| Boomin' Bird | Limited | None | None |
| HNY | Rare | None | None |
| Hornet | Limited | None | None |
| Pixelated Shades | Limited | None | None |
| RL Esports 2022 | Limited | None | None |
| Speedy Turtle | Limited | None | None |
| Statesman | Limited | None | None |
| Topographic | Common | None | None |
| Yolkel | Limited | None | None |
| Yolkel | Limited | None | None |
AvatarBorder Items
| Item Name | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|
| Crown | Limited | Grey | None |
| Crown | Limited | None | None |
Blueprints
| Blueprint Name | Item Type | Rarity | Paint Color | Certification |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Air Strike | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Purple | None |
| Air Strike | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Pink | None |
| Air Strike | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Air Strike | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Anodized | PaintFinish | Legacy | None | None |
| Carbonator | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Orange | ShowOff |
| Dingo: Dragon Lord | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Dire Wolf | Wheels | Legacy | None | None |
| Dominus: Dragon | Decal | Legacy | None | Victor |
| Dueling Dragons | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Dueling Dragons | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | Sweeper |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | BurntSienna | None |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | Goalkeeper |
| Encryption | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Exalter | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Exalter | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Fennec | Body | Legacy | None | None |
| Fennec | Body | Legacy | None | None |
| Fennec: Oozy | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | Aviator |
| Humid Haze | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Incantor | RocketBoost | Legacy | Cobalt | None |
| Interstellar | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | Victor |
| Interstellar | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Interstellar | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Jak'd: Obverse | Wheels | Legacy | ForestGreen | Playmaker |
| Phoenix Cannon | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Phoenix Cannon | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Grey | None |
| Phoenix Cannon | GoalExplosion | Legacy | TitaniumWhite | Tactician |
| Phoenix Cannon | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | Playmaker |
| Phoenix Cannon | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Orange | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | Paragon |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | Guardian |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Purple | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | ShowOff |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | SkyBlue | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | Purple | None |
| Shade Raid | GoalExplosion | Legacy | None | None |
| Stipple Gait | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Stipple Gait | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Stride Tide | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Stride Tide | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Stride Tide | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | ShowOff |
| Stride Tide | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Stride Tide | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Tidal Stream | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
| Warp Wave | AnimatedDecal | Legacy | None | None |
2023.06.09 03:04 Unitedhydra URGENT: 9 year old daughter with ADHD ODD is VERY violent help
EDIT: does ANYONE have experience with calling an ambulance/going to Emerg.? I know my friend has taking her autistic son there before for fits and i also have a friend with schizophrenia who has been taken in. Here our hospitals are good with mental health-related stuff but what could they even do for us? Would having documentation of these episodes maybe be useful for the paediatrician to see what we are trying (and failing) to cope with?
My daughter has a long history of violent outbursts (this feels like an understatement- she is feral) that don’t seem to have attenuated at all since they started at age 3. Now that she is 9, she still punches, kicks, bites, scratches, throws things, uses weapons (any whip-like or stick-like object she can get her hands on) on, and yells rude, offensive, and profane things at us when she is like this. Her outbursts are seemingly random (to us), she can’t regulate her emotions almost at all when she gets frustrated and once the train starts, it doesn’t stop till she burns herself out.
For context (and this is the internet so you’ll have to take my word for it) we have never ever been violent back, but do restrain her by putting her in a bear-hug if things get dangerous. My husband and I both hold degrees in psychology and understand this condition very well in theory - in practice it’s incredibly hard to cope with and we are becoming burned out.
She has a paediatrician and was prescribed methylphenidate, which she was doing really well on until she stopped taking it (she has been on just shy of a month). She is refusing because she has a hard time swallowing pills and our pharmacies only carry pressed pill forms - we’re hoping to get dexedrine from the Dr tomorrow so we can break the cap open at put it in yogurt for her.
Anyways, now that she has been off of the medication for a week her behaviour is back to square one and we can’t handle it. We have no idea what to do anymore when she flies into a rage. The usual formula we have for helping her manage these things just isn’t working and she has become abusive to her younger siblings despite the fact that we are doing everything possible to remove her or them from the situation.
We feel that our only next option during those moments is to bring her to the hospital or call the cops. If she goes back on medication then that’s great - if she refuses to stay on we have no idea what we will do and are beginning to fear for our safety.
submitted by Unitedhydra to ADHD [link] [comments]
My daughter has a long history of violent outbursts (this feels like an understatement- she is feral) that don’t seem to have attenuated at all since they started at age 3. Now that she is 9, she still punches, kicks, bites, scratches, throws things, uses weapons (any whip-like or stick-like object she can get her hands on) on, and yells rude, offensive, and profane things at us when she is like this. Her outbursts are seemingly random (to us), she can’t regulate her emotions almost at all when she gets frustrated and once the train starts, it doesn’t stop till she burns herself out.
For context (and this is the internet so you’ll have to take my word for it) we have never ever been violent back, but do restrain her by putting her in a bear-hug if things get dangerous. My husband and I both hold degrees in psychology and understand this condition very well in theory - in practice it’s incredibly hard to cope with and we are becoming burned out.
She has a paediatrician and was prescribed methylphenidate, which she was doing really well on until she stopped taking it (she has been on just shy of a month). She is refusing because she has a hard time swallowing pills and our pharmacies only carry pressed pill forms - we’re hoping to get dexedrine from the Dr tomorrow so we can break the cap open at put it in yogurt for her.
Anyways, now that she has been off of the medication for a week her behaviour is back to square one and we can’t handle it. We have no idea what to do anymore when she flies into a rage. The usual formula we have for helping her manage these things just isn’t working and she has become abusive to her younger siblings despite the fact that we are doing everything possible to remove her or them from the situation.
We feel that our only next option during those moments is to bring her to the hospital or call the cops. If she goes back on medication then that’s great - if she refuses to stay on we have no idea what we will do and are beginning to fear for our safety.
2023.06.09 02:56 Mudkip-Mudkip-Mudkip I'd like to share a wild conspiracy theory.
To preface, I'm not claiming that any of this is true. It is all just speculation, and I'm posting it for entertainment value (not to rile people up!). If you reply, don't be a jerk or be rowdy; I encourage the mods to lock or delete this post if it gets too crazy.
Now, with that being said...
My crazy conspiracy theory:
Reddit comments are currently down. That's nothing out of the ordinary, right? Things break, and it happened towards the end of last month, too.
But, as many of you know, today is the day that Apollo, RIF, and Sync announced they will be shutting down. Along with this, the developer of Apollo produced receipts demonstrating that the claims he threatened the Reddit admins were misleading. As you can imagine, a lot of people were and are in an uproar.
As a response, Spez, the CEO of Reddit will be doing an AMA tomorrow (reportedly at around 10:30 AM PT).
"Yes, yes. That's all fine and factual, but where's the conspiracy?" you may be wondering. And to that, I suggest that the comments being down is the conspiracy. Wouldn't it be awfully convenient if the comment system failed right in the middle of a controversy storm? You know, that same comment system which is powered by the API which Reddit is claiming third-parties aren't using efficiently?
Now, it could simply be Redditors giving Reddit itself the good old hug of death. Or, maybe it's a false flag operation. It would be an excellent response to app-related questions on tomorrow's AMA, doubling down on their decision and claiming this outage as proof that they're doing the right thing. A pretty standard DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender) trick to redirect anger away from themselves and towards the projects they disagree with.
I mean, as of writing, Reddit's status page still doesn't show any known outages. Nothing to be said from their Twitter, either. You would thank that after almost an hour, something would be mentioned...
And that's my wild conspiracy theory. Please remember that:
Edit (5 minutes after posting): The status page is now showing that they're fixed the problem and are monitoring it.
Edit: I have been informed by (currently invisible) comments that a massive political megathread was created an hour ago. Yup, that'll definitely overload the comment system. Leaving my original conspiracy theory up anyway, but with this newfound knowledge, please consider it debunked.
submitted by Mudkip-Mudkip-Mudkip to Save3rdPartyApps [link] [comments]
Now, with that being said...
Reddit comments are currently down. That's nothing out of the ordinary, right? Things break, and it happened towards the end of last month, too.
But, as many of you know, today is the day that Apollo, RIF, and Sync announced they will be shutting down. Along with this, the developer of Apollo produced receipts demonstrating that the claims he threatened the Reddit admins were misleading. As you can imagine, a lot of people were and are in an uproar.
As a response, Spez, the CEO of Reddit will be doing an AMA tomorrow (reportedly at around 10:30 AM PT).
"Yes, yes. That's all fine and factual, but where's the conspiracy?" you may be wondering. And to that, I suggest that the comments being down is the conspiracy. Wouldn't it be awfully convenient if the comment system failed right in the middle of a controversy storm? You know, that same comment system which is powered by the API which Reddit is claiming third-parties aren't using efficiently?
Now, it could simply be Redditors giving Reddit itself the good old hug of death. Or, maybe it's a false flag operation. It would be an excellent response to app-related questions on tomorrow's AMA, doubling down on their decision and claiming this outage as proof that they're doing the right thing. A pretty standard DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender) trick to redirect anger away from themselves and towards the projects they disagree with.
I mean, as of writing, Reddit's status page still doesn't show any known outages. Nothing to be said from their Twitter, either. You would thank that after almost an hour, something would be mentioned...
- I put it all together for fun, not to incite outrage.
- It's entirely speculation, and none of it has been confirmed.
- Do not participate in any of the linked threads; and
- Don't be a jerk in the comments.
Edit (5 minutes after posting): The status page is now showing that they're fixed the problem and are monitoring it.
Edit: I have been informed by (currently invisible) comments that a massive political megathread was created an hour ago. Yup, that'll definitely overload the comment system. Leaving my original conspiracy theory up anyway, but with this newfound knowledge, please consider it debunked.
2023.06.09 02:53 archiearcher I Need a Marinade to tenderize a London Broil. I have no soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce, or balsamic vinegar.
I also don't have any lemon juice, but I do have oranges.
This is more of a challenge to see what I can do with what I have. If it's not possible I'll go to the store tomorrow and postpone the broil.
What I have:
submitted by archiearcher to Cooking [link] [comments]
This is more of a challenge to see what I can do with what I have. If it's not possible I'll go to the store tomorrow and postpone the broil.
What I have:
- 1.36 lb London Broil, raw. Maybe an inch thick.
- Canola Oil
- Oranges
- Kosher Salt, Black Peppercorns, garlic powder, red pepper flakes, sugar, celery seeds, Italian seasoning, oregeno.
- Expired apple cider vinegar
- carrots
- dill pickles (the kind that you buy cold in the plastic tubs)
- BBQ sauce
- spicy brown mustard
2023.06.09 02:26 FormalSmoke The Wales Bonner x adidas SS23 Footwear Collection Debuts Tomorrow
Check out Amazon Gold Box Daily Deals
Check out the Top Deals on Sneakers for Sale on Amazon!
The Wales Bonner x adidas SS23 Footwear Collection Debuts Tomorrow
adidas Originals and Wales Bonner continue their ongoing collaborative partnership with a Spring/Summer 2023 collection. For this collection, the central focus switches to the Caribbean as the British designer adroitly explores the Trefoil’s lasting presence within Jamaican culture.
This season sees Bonner returning to the classic adidas Samba and the SL72 running shoe, both were both featured in the FW20 and SS22 drops. Shown below, the Samba is crafted in full leather covered in a reflective gunmetal finish with decorative-stitched Three Stripes branding on the sides and heel badge. Its oversized tongues nods to the retro soccer boots while sitting atop an Earthy Brown rubber sole. The SL72 Knit will drop in two color options. Both comes constructed out of a knitted upper with suede overlays and premium leather tongues, heels, and inner lining for an extra premium touch. The first one is dressed in Green with Yellow contrasting accents, while the other comes in a Brown with Burnt Orange accents. All three pairs come with Wales Bonner branding on the lateral heel, insoles, and co-branding packaging.
Drawing on the nation’s awe-inspiring landscape and environment, the collection features a matching light teal nylon tracksuit, signature tracksuit in elevated knit construction, striking silver anorak with matching shorts, and the introduction of a Jamaican icon in the form of a Harrington jacket and flared trouser set. Other highlights include a toweling top and shorts set, knitted geometric patten roll neck, knitted sweater vest, neutral sweater sweatpant set, and two vibrant short-sleeve cotton t-shirts.
Get an official look at the Wales Bonner x adidas SS23 Footwear Collection below and look for them to release on June 9th at select adidas Originals retailers and adidas.com. Retail is set at $200 per pair.
In Jordan Brand news, check out official images of the upcoming Air Jordan 1 Low OG Black Cement.
submitted by FormalSmoke to ShoeSneakerFashion [link] [comments]
Check out the Top Deals on Sneakers for Sale on Amazon!
The Wales Bonner x adidas SS23 Footwear Collection Debuts Tomorrow
adidas Originals and Wales Bonner continue their ongoing collaborative partnership with a Spring/Summer 2023 collection. For this collection, the central focus switches to the Caribbean as the British designer adroitly explores the Trefoil’s lasting presence within Jamaican culture.
This season sees Bonner returning to the classic adidas Samba and the SL72 running shoe, both were both featured in the FW20 and SS22 drops. Shown below, the Samba is crafted in full leather covered in a reflective gunmetal finish with decorative-stitched Three Stripes branding on the sides and heel badge. Its oversized tongues nods to the retro soccer boots while sitting atop an Earthy Brown rubber sole. The SL72 Knit will drop in two color options. Both comes constructed out of a knitted upper with suede overlays and premium leather tongues, heels, and inner lining for an extra premium touch. The first one is dressed in Green with Yellow contrasting accents, while the other comes in a Brown with Burnt Orange accents. All three pairs come with Wales Bonner branding on the lateral heel, insoles, and co-branding packaging.
Drawing on the nation’s awe-inspiring landscape and environment, the collection features a matching light teal nylon tracksuit, signature tracksuit in elevated knit construction, striking silver anorak with matching shorts, and the introduction of a Jamaican icon in the form of a Harrington jacket and flared trouser set. Other highlights include a toweling top and shorts set, knitted geometric patten roll neck, knitted sweater vest, neutral sweater sweatpant set, and two vibrant short-sleeve cotton t-shirts.
Get an official look at the Wales Bonner x adidas SS23 Footwear Collection below and look for them to release on June 9th at select adidas Originals retailers and adidas.com. Retail is set at $200 per pair.
In Jordan Brand news, check out official images of the upcoming Air Jordan 1 Low OG Black Cement.
2023.06.09 02:03 sushi_fufu Get a personal trainer or join a regular gym?
I need advice because I’m at a point that if I don’t do anything I’ll gain more and more weight. I have been trying to lose weight on my own since last year but it has been difficult.
I joined planet fitness and was doing my own workouts got bored and busy with work. Joined orange theory thinking a group would be more my speed but that class almost killed me lol. Changed up and joined club Pilates, classes were never available and I felt like the instructors half the time didn’t know what they were doing. I really need guidance but at the same time need motivation lol.
I have two places I’m considering. One place offers one on one training 2x a week for 360 a month. They would give me a meal plan and do daily weigh in with me. The other place is just a regular gym with classes and boot camps that offer membership for 20 bucks a month.
It’s just committing to a place for 360 is a lot to me but doing it alone, I have failed at before. Help me decide.
submitted by sushi_fufu to blackladies [link] [comments]
I joined planet fitness and was doing my own workouts got bored and busy with work. Joined orange theory thinking a group would be more my speed but that class almost killed me lol. Changed up and joined club Pilates, classes were never available and I felt like the instructors half the time didn’t know what they were doing. I really need guidance but at the same time need motivation lol.
I have two places I’m considering. One place offers one on one training 2x a week for 360 a month. They would give me a meal plan and do daily weigh in with me. The other place is just a regular gym with classes and boot camps that offer membership for 20 bucks a month.
It’s just committing to a place for 360 is a lot to me but doing it alone, I have failed at before. Help me decide.
2023.06.09 01:26 AuthorInHell Hindsight's a Bitch (Color Me Black CH2)
After they left, I locked the front door and carried on cleaning. Normally I wouldn't worry about locking the door until I left, but even if those strangers were two of the most attractive men I had the pleasure of looking upon, I didn't know them, and therefore, I didn't trust them.
Small town charm, indeed.
As I grabbed the last few bottles from by the pool table, the jukebox cut out. I rolled my eyes and made a mental note to call Jerry tomorrow about it. It was too late now, after I started bartending for him, Jerry took full advantage of not having to be here 24/7. He was likely already asleep.
The lights flickered as I pulled the trash bag out and threw it over my shoulder, but I shrugged it off, even as chills spread across my arms. The place was old, and probably haunted, and it wasn't the first time weird shit had happened here. I threw open the back door, crinkling my nose at the smell, and tossed the bag in the dumpster before locking up and heading to my car.
My car was technically Jim's old truck, but after he passed, Doris said I should have it. I tried to insist that it go to Polly when she was old enough to drive, but Doris just said I had helped him work on it enough that it should go to me. Polly wasn't one for trucks anyway, she had claimed. It was only when Polly put the keys in my hand herself that I actually accepted it. Seven years later, and the old, ugly thing still ran great.
God, I've been overly sentimental today. Let's move on.
The thing about hindsight, they say it's 20/20. After this day, I'd say it's a bitch. All it does is make you think about every single thing you did wrong, over and over again, until it drives you crazy. And crazy people don't tend to see all that clearly.
The house was dark when I pulled up, the only light coming from the moon. Which you'd think would be normal, it being ten something at night, but the porch light was always left on for me, and Polly doesn't normally go to bed this early. Doris doesn't either, but she may have gone to sleep earlier than usual if I had woken her up last night. She probably just forgot the porch light.
I walked up the steps and found the front door slightly open. Now THAT was not normal. I paused at the threshold long enough to pull out my Glock. I checked the sled and loaded the magazine before slowly pushing the door open with my foot. I longed to call out to Doris and Polly, to make sure they were okay, if they were even here (holding out hope that they aren't), but instinct and years of hunting kept my mouth shut.
I tried to keep my footsteps silent, avoiding the spots in the floor I know creak and groan. An overwhelming smell, like rotting eggs, filled the air. It triggered something in the corner of my brain, but I couldn't focus on it right now. The kitchen and living room were clear, and so was the downstairs bathroom.
I walked towards the stairs and the smell intensified. You know when people say they felt like lead was in the pit of their stomach? Turns out, they weren't overexaggerating.
There was no noise, save for my own breathing, as I crept up. Room by room, I cleared the house. No one was here. No sign of Doris, or Polly. I wanted to feel relieved, I really did, but life has taught me that relief is often a feeling followed by dread.
Sentimental has flown out the window.
I checked the windows upstairs, making sure they were all closed and locked, before going downstairs to do the same. I stopped short at the sight of Lenny and Barry. In my living room. Normally, this would constitute as a dream come true, but the guns in their hands definitely gave me pause on the horny fantasy.
They hadn't noticed me yet, so I slowly raised my gun and watched as they made their way into the kitchen. I followed them silently, keeping my gun level, until they reached the table.
"I'm gonna need you to drop the weapons and explain what, exactly, you're doing in my house."
They whirled around, both going to aim at me, but I was quicker. I shot a warning round into the floor by their feet. (Doris was seriously going to kill me for that.) They both jumped back, hands raised in the air.
"I didn't say wave them around, I said drop them."
"Look, Winnie-"
"Drop the goddamn guns!" I said, as I cocked my own back.
"Fine, fine," Barry said, slowly bending at the knees to place his gun on the floor. "Just calm down, alright?"
Lenny looked irritated but followed suit, putting his weapon on the ground gently.
"Kick them aside."
Sighs of absolute exasperation floated through the air. (Seriously? Breaking into my house and then getting annoyed at me? Get a load of these guys.)
"Where are Doris and Polly?"
"Who?" Lenny asked, irritation coloring the word.
"Don't play stupid, I'm really not in the mood."
"Lady, I don't know who those people are." He snapped.
"Doris and Polly," I repeated slowly. "The two women who live in this house with me. The house you just broke into, with loaded weapons. After I come home to find them missing."
"Look, we can explain," Barry started.
"I would hope so, considering the alternative." I gestured with my head at the gun in my hand.
"Just lower your gun, and we'll tell you everything."
"Listen, Bare, may I call you Bare?" I continued without waiting for permission, "You seem to not understand how this works. Your weapons are out of reach, mine is in hand, you're in MY house, and my family is missing. I'll lower the gun if I decide your explanation is good enough. Which seems unlikely."
My voice, somehow, was holding completely steady, but inwardly, panic was filling every empty part of my body. My brain was screaming at me to stop wasting time, but I forced that voice aside. At this point, the only people who could tell me anything were standing in front of me, one looking pissed off and the other looking very concerned. About me or the imminent death he faced, I couldn't be sure.
"Winsley, your family, they've been taken by-"
"Sammy!"
"Dean, she deserves to know. She's in this, whether we like it or not."
I blinked at the sudden identity change, although I have to say, I was kind of grateful that two dudes who looked this good didn't have names like Lenny and Barry. Even if they were possible kidnappers.
Dean, previously Lenny, clenched his jaw, but didn't say anything when Sammy, previously Barry, started again. "They've been taken by what we think is a demon. We're not sure why yet, but that's why we're here. It's what we do. We, we save people from things like this."
"Things like demons." I deadpanned. "So you're story is, a demon has, for some unknown reason, kidnapped my family, and you two just happen to be here at the same time as this thing, because life is all just one big coininky dink?"
"We tracked it here," Lenny/Dean spoke up. "It's been traveling through Wyoming, ripping through small towns. It's killed before, but it's never kidnapped anyone. Until now. So whatever this thing wants, your family has it. And you're not exactly helping us save 'em."
"And your plan was to shoot this demon full of lead? Do demons bleed? Can they even die?"
"They're full of rock salt," Barry/Sammy said. "Salt doesn't kill them, but it hurts them. Slows 'em down. We slow them down enough, we can get them wrapped in rope soaked in holy water and get the answers we all want."
Hysterical laughter bubbled up in my throat. I've been a bartender for 7 years, in a small ass town in the middle of nowhere, and before that, well, that's a backstory for another chapter, but let's just conclude that I know crazy. I've delt with crazy, but this was above and beyond.
"This is either some elaborate scheme to distract me, or you're both having a psychotic break at the same time."
"Okay, enough," Dean snapped. Faster than I could track, he whipped out yet another gun from behind him and aimed it at me.
"Am I now a demon in this illusion of yours? Rock salt isn't gonna do shit to me."
"Well, actually, it hurts like a bitch." He said, shrugging. "Curiosity got the best of me. But this ain't no rock salt, sweetheart. So why don't you put the gun down, because I guarantee you I can pull this trigger faster than you."
I paused, considering, before twisting and aiming my gun at Sammy's head. "You wanna test that theory?"
They both went deathly still. Apparently, they decided to finally take my threat seriously.
"Fine, you know what? You want your family to die, that's on you, lady. We can leave you to it," Dean put his gun down and went to grab the other one from the floor. "But don't say we didn't warn you."
He went to walk out the back door, Sammy hesitantly grabbing his own gun before following Dean out.
"Wait. Fine. But I want some of those rock salt thingies."
Dean glanced back. "No."
Sammy ignored him and handed me his pistol. "Aim for the heart."
I slowly holstered my gun, replacing it with his.
"Dammit, Sammy."
"I think she can handle herself, Dean."
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed so hard I was surprised it didn't propel him backwards.
"Are there any other buildings around here that might be abandoned or empty? Somewhere used for storage?"
"Yeah, we have a barn. Jim used to keep some of his old junk in there."
"Show us."
"Okay, full offense, for someone supposedly trying to help, you are extremely rude."
"Yes, and I look good doing it."
I narrowed my eyes at him but lead them out the backdoor. Before you start yelling at me, I'm not believing this bullshit. They're clearly insane, and they probably have my family locked in the barn, and I figure once they go inside to "scope the place out", I'll call Sherrif Bereta and get these beautiful loonies locked up.
That plan went dark, literally, as a sharp pain cracked through my skull and I crumbled to the ground.
*******************************
I'm sure we've all heard the term "spitting mad". Well, whatever that means, I was even angrier when I came to, back in the kitchen, surrounded by a ring of salt and tied up with, sure enough, a soggy rope. It itched.
Okay, yes. I got, well, got. I spent the past ten years of my life hunting animals, not fighting crime, okay? Give me a break. I thought my plan had been pretty solid.
I glanced around, trying to get my bearings through the bulldozer that had made its home in my head. Two major headaches in one day. If the tequila didn't kill my braincells, that hit certainly did.
"Bastards," I muttered to myself. I wiggled against the ropes, but all that managed to do was chafe. I attempted to stand, but they had tied my ankles together and to my bound wrists, so not only did I fail, I looked ridiculous doing it.
The panic I was ignoring earlier came back with renewed strength, and I had to stop all movement and focus on my breathing. I haven't had a panic attack in years, and I really didn't think this was a smart time to start again.
The silence broke with a screech that sounded, as much as I loathe to admit it, demonic. I'm not a religious person, if you couldn't tell, working a Sunday morning instead of attending church, so I didn't break out in prayer. I did, however, look around for any kind of weapon that I could try to get my hands on. My gun was sitting on the table, just out of reach.
"Bastards!" I announced again.
"That's no way to talk about the people who saved your ass."
Dean was standing in the doorway, a light coat of sweat shining across his forehead. His breathing was quick, but all in all, he seemed steady.
"You pistol whipped me, hog tied me, and seasoned me, dude. I wouldn't constitute that as 'saving'."
"Yeah, well. Difference of opinion," he said, a small smile playing across his lips.
"Where's your future cellmate?"
"He's finishing up with the demon. Should be here any minute."
"Ah, yes. The demon. Did you get any answers? Did you find Polly and Doris? Did you develop the sudden need to enroll yourself into a mental institution?"
Before Dean could answer, Sam came into view behind him, and on his arm was Polly. My breath caught in my throat as I looked her over, bruised, bleeding from a cut on her forehead, but alive. On her feet.
"Polly thank god, I was so worried-" I went to stand up, forgetting about the ropes, and promptly fell over. "Can you get these goddamn things off of me?"
Dean glanced over at his brother, and Sammy nodded. He lead Polly to a chair and positioned himself in front of her.
"Do you think I'm going to attack my own family? I'm not the one suffering from some kind of breakdown." I said, watching Dean pull out a knife and ever so slowly cut through the ropes. As soon as they fell off, I stood, rubbing my raw wrists, and went to make my way to Polly.
"Where's Doris?" I asked, kneeling in front of her. "Is she okay? Did she get caught up at bible study or did these two lunatics tie her up, too?"
Polly lifted her tear soaked eyes, grief overflowing in them.
There's something you should know about Big Traumatic Events, and it's that time moves differently in them. You know when you were a kid, swimming in a pool, and you sunk down to the bottom? The world was quiet, and your limbs were heavy and light at the same time, moving through the water as if time had slowed.
That's what it's like.
I rocked back on my heels.
I stood and whipped towards Sam.
I lunged for the gun.
Sammy caught my arms, pushing me back as I fought against him.
There was a sound trying to pierce through the overwhelming emptiness in my head. A sound that sounded a lot like a wounded animal. It's a sound I know well.
When Polly swam into view, putting my face between her hands, I realized that I was that sound. Something between a scream and a sob was falling out of me, and I couldn't stop it.
"Winnie. It's okay. It's gonna be okay," she sobbed with me.
I wrenched myself away from her. I couldn't, wouldn't, allow myself to be calmed down.
"What did you do to her?!" I screamed.
"She was possessed, Winnie."
"Don't call me that."
"By the time we got to her, it was too late. The demon had destroyed her body, and it was the only thing holding her together."
"STOP USING YOUR INSANE THEORIES AS AN EXCUSE FOR WHY YOU KILLED MY MOTHER!"
My chest heaved, and the two murdering bastards just stood there. They had the gall to even look sad. What did they have to be sad about? They're the ones going around killing people, claiming it's in the name of- of what? God? I didn't care.
"It's true, Winnie."
My breath came up short as I turned to look at Polly. Tears still streamed down her face, mingling with the blood. I noticed her lip was split, too, and added another tally to the scoreboard. I'd kill them.
"She was, she was different. She wasn't mom. She hit me. She tied me up. She tried to torture me, asking me questions that I didn't understand."
"No, Polly. These lunatics probably drugged you or something. THEY tortured you. They're feeding you their delusions."
"No, they aren't!" She shouted. "I saw it, okay? I saw her become that thing. I saw her eyes turn black. And I felt every moment she laid her hands on me. She was MY mom, Winnie. I knew her better than anyone, and I know that wasn't her."
Those words broke something deep inside of me, deeper than even Doris's death. Polly was right. Doris was her mother. Not mine. I looked at Dean, at Sammy, at the gun, my gun, that he was now holding in his hands, probably to keep me from putting a few rounds in the two of them.
I took a deep breath and simply said, "Fine."
And I left.
Authors note:
Yeah I made myself sad. I also feel like I used the word "Gun" so much. But really what else do I call it? Anyway. Supernatural ripped my heart out like twenty thousand times, so it's only fair I add some heartbreak to this story. Hope you like it!
submitted by AuthorInHell to u/AuthorInHell [link] [comments]
Small town charm, indeed.
As I grabbed the last few bottles from by the pool table, the jukebox cut out. I rolled my eyes and made a mental note to call Jerry tomorrow about it. It was too late now, after I started bartending for him, Jerry took full advantage of not having to be here 24/7. He was likely already asleep.
The lights flickered as I pulled the trash bag out and threw it over my shoulder, but I shrugged it off, even as chills spread across my arms. The place was old, and probably haunted, and it wasn't the first time weird shit had happened here. I threw open the back door, crinkling my nose at the smell, and tossed the bag in the dumpster before locking up and heading to my car.
My car was technically Jim's old truck, but after he passed, Doris said I should have it. I tried to insist that it go to Polly when she was old enough to drive, but Doris just said I had helped him work on it enough that it should go to me. Polly wasn't one for trucks anyway, she had claimed. It was only when Polly put the keys in my hand herself that I actually accepted it. Seven years later, and the old, ugly thing still ran great.
God, I've been overly sentimental today. Let's move on.
The thing about hindsight, they say it's 20/20. After this day, I'd say it's a bitch. All it does is make you think about every single thing you did wrong, over and over again, until it drives you crazy. And crazy people don't tend to see all that clearly.
The house was dark when I pulled up, the only light coming from the moon. Which you'd think would be normal, it being ten something at night, but the porch light was always left on for me, and Polly doesn't normally go to bed this early. Doris doesn't either, but she may have gone to sleep earlier than usual if I had woken her up last night. She probably just forgot the porch light.
I walked up the steps and found the front door slightly open. Now THAT was not normal. I paused at the threshold long enough to pull out my Glock. I checked the sled and loaded the magazine before slowly pushing the door open with my foot. I longed to call out to Doris and Polly, to make sure they were okay, if they were even here (holding out hope that they aren't), but instinct and years of hunting kept my mouth shut.
I tried to keep my footsteps silent, avoiding the spots in the floor I know creak and groan. An overwhelming smell, like rotting eggs, filled the air. It triggered something in the corner of my brain, but I couldn't focus on it right now. The kitchen and living room were clear, and so was the downstairs bathroom.
I walked towards the stairs and the smell intensified. You know when people say they felt like lead was in the pit of their stomach? Turns out, they weren't overexaggerating.
There was no noise, save for my own breathing, as I crept up. Room by room, I cleared the house. No one was here. No sign of Doris, or Polly. I wanted to feel relieved, I really did, but life has taught me that relief is often a feeling followed by dread.
Sentimental has flown out the window.
I checked the windows upstairs, making sure they were all closed and locked, before going downstairs to do the same. I stopped short at the sight of Lenny and Barry. In my living room. Normally, this would constitute as a dream come true, but the guns in their hands definitely gave me pause on the horny fantasy.
They hadn't noticed me yet, so I slowly raised my gun and watched as they made their way into the kitchen. I followed them silently, keeping my gun level, until they reached the table.
"I'm gonna need you to drop the weapons and explain what, exactly, you're doing in my house."
They whirled around, both going to aim at me, but I was quicker. I shot a warning round into the floor by their feet. (Doris was seriously going to kill me for that.) They both jumped back, hands raised in the air.
"I didn't say wave them around, I said drop them."
"Look, Winnie-"
"Drop the goddamn guns!" I said, as I cocked my own back.
"Fine, fine," Barry said, slowly bending at the knees to place his gun on the floor. "Just calm down, alright?"
Lenny looked irritated but followed suit, putting his weapon on the ground gently.
"Kick them aside."
Sighs of absolute exasperation floated through the air. (Seriously? Breaking into my house and then getting annoyed at me? Get a load of these guys.)
"Where are Doris and Polly?"
"Who?" Lenny asked, irritation coloring the word.
"Don't play stupid, I'm really not in the mood."
"Lady, I don't know who those people are." He snapped.
"Doris and Polly," I repeated slowly. "The two women who live in this house with me. The house you just broke into, with loaded weapons. After I come home to find them missing."
"Look, we can explain," Barry started.
"I would hope so, considering the alternative." I gestured with my head at the gun in my hand.
"Just lower your gun, and we'll tell you everything."
"Listen, Bare, may I call you Bare?" I continued without waiting for permission, "You seem to not understand how this works. Your weapons are out of reach, mine is in hand, you're in MY house, and my family is missing. I'll lower the gun if I decide your explanation is good enough. Which seems unlikely."
My voice, somehow, was holding completely steady, but inwardly, panic was filling every empty part of my body. My brain was screaming at me to stop wasting time, but I forced that voice aside. At this point, the only people who could tell me anything were standing in front of me, one looking pissed off and the other looking very concerned. About me or the imminent death he faced, I couldn't be sure.
"Winsley, your family, they've been taken by-"
"Sammy!"
"Dean, she deserves to know. She's in this, whether we like it or not."
I blinked at the sudden identity change, although I have to say, I was kind of grateful that two dudes who looked this good didn't have names like Lenny and Barry. Even if they were possible kidnappers.
Dean, previously Lenny, clenched his jaw, but didn't say anything when Sammy, previously Barry, started again. "They've been taken by what we think is a demon. We're not sure why yet, but that's why we're here. It's what we do. We, we save people from things like this."
"Things like demons." I deadpanned. "So you're story is, a demon has, for some unknown reason, kidnapped my family, and you two just happen to be here at the same time as this thing, because life is all just one big coininky dink?"
"We tracked it here," Lenny/Dean spoke up. "It's been traveling through Wyoming, ripping through small towns. It's killed before, but it's never kidnapped anyone. Until now. So whatever this thing wants, your family has it. And you're not exactly helping us save 'em."
"And your plan was to shoot this demon full of lead? Do demons bleed? Can they even die?"
"They're full of rock salt," Barry/Sammy said. "Salt doesn't kill them, but it hurts them. Slows 'em down. We slow them down enough, we can get them wrapped in rope soaked in holy water and get the answers we all want."
Hysterical laughter bubbled up in my throat. I've been a bartender for 7 years, in a small ass town in the middle of nowhere, and before that, well, that's a backstory for another chapter, but let's just conclude that I know crazy. I've delt with crazy, but this was above and beyond.
"This is either some elaborate scheme to distract me, or you're both having a psychotic break at the same time."
"Okay, enough," Dean snapped. Faster than I could track, he whipped out yet another gun from behind him and aimed it at me.
"Am I now a demon in this illusion of yours? Rock salt isn't gonna do shit to me."
"Well, actually, it hurts like a bitch." He said, shrugging. "Curiosity got the best of me. But this ain't no rock salt, sweetheart. So why don't you put the gun down, because I guarantee you I can pull this trigger faster than you."
I paused, considering, before twisting and aiming my gun at Sammy's head. "You wanna test that theory?"
They both went deathly still. Apparently, they decided to finally take my threat seriously.
"Fine, you know what? You want your family to die, that's on you, lady. We can leave you to it," Dean put his gun down and went to grab the other one from the floor. "But don't say we didn't warn you."
He went to walk out the back door, Sammy hesitantly grabbing his own gun before following Dean out.
"Wait. Fine. But I want some of those rock salt thingies."
Dean glanced back. "No."
Sammy ignored him and handed me his pistol. "Aim for the heart."
I slowly holstered my gun, replacing it with his.
"Dammit, Sammy."
"I think she can handle herself, Dean."
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed so hard I was surprised it didn't propel him backwards.
"Are there any other buildings around here that might be abandoned or empty? Somewhere used for storage?"
"Yeah, we have a barn. Jim used to keep some of his old junk in there."
"Show us."
"Okay, full offense, for someone supposedly trying to help, you are extremely rude."
"Yes, and I look good doing it."
I narrowed my eyes at him but lead them out the backdoor. Before you start yelling at me, I'm not believing this bullshit. They're clearly insane, and they probably have my family locked in the barn, and I figure once they go inside to "scope the place out", I'll call Sherrif Bereta and get these beautiful loonies locked up.
That plan went dark, literally, as a sharp pain cracked through my skull and I crumbled to the ground.
*******************************
I'm sure we've all heard the term "spitting mad". Well, whatever that means, I was even angrier when I came to, back in the kitchen, surrounded by a ring of salt and tied up with, sure enough, a soggy rope. It itched.
Okay, yes. I got, well, got. I spent the past ten years of my life hunting animals, not fighting crime, okay? Give me a break. I thought my plan had been pretty solid.
I glanced around, trying to get my bearings through the bulldozer that had made its home in my head. Two major headaches in one day. If the tequila didn't kill my braincells, that hit certainly did.
"Bastards," I muttered to myself. I wiggled against the ropes, but all that managed to do was chafe. I attempted to stand, but they had tied my ankles together and to my bound wrists, so not only did I fail, I looked ridiculous doing it.
The panic I was ignoring earlier came back with renewed strength, and I had to stop all movement and focus on my breathing. I haven't had a panic attack in years, and I really didn't think this was a smart time to start again.
The silence broke with a screech that sounded, as much as I loathe to admit it, demonic. I'm not a religious person, if you couldn't tell, working a Sunday morning instead of attending church, so I didn't break out in prayer. I did, however, look around for any kind of weapon that I could try to get my hands on. My gun was sitting on the table, just out of reach.
"Bastards!" I announced again.
"That's no way to talk about the people who saved your ass."
Dean was standing in the doorway, a light coat of sweat shining across his forehead. His breathing was quick, but all in all, he seemed steady.
"You pistol whipped me, hog tied me, and seasoned me, dude. I wouldn't constitute that as 'saving'."
"Yeah, well. Difference of opinion," he said, a small smile playing across his lips.
"Where's your future cellmate?"
"He's finishing up with the demon. Should be here any minute."
"Ah, yes. The demon. Did you get any answers? Did you find Polly and Doris? Did you develop the sudden need to enroll yourself into a mental institution?"
Before Dean could answer, Sam came into view behind him, and on his arm was Polly. My breath caught in my throat as I looked her over, bruised, bleeding from a cut on her forehead, but alive. On her feet.
"Polly thank god, I was so worried-" I went to stand up, forgetting about the ropes, and promptly fell over. "Can you get these goddamn things off of me?"
Dean glanced over at his brother, and Sammy nodded. He lead Polly to a chair and positioned himself in front of her.
"Do you think I'm going to attack my own family? I'm not the one suffering from some kind of breakdown." I said, watching Dean pull out a knife and ever so slowly cut through the ropes. As soon as they fell off, I stood, rubbing my raw wrists, and went to make my way to Polly.
"Where's Doris?" I asked, kneeling in front of her. "Is she okay? Did she get caught up at bible study or did these two lunatics tie her up, too?"
Polly lifted her tear soaked eyes, grief overflowing in them.
There's something you should know about Big Traumatic Events, and it's that time moves differently in them. You know when you were a kid, swimming in a pool, and you sunk down to the bottom? The world was quiet, and your limbs were heavy and light at the same time, moving through the water as if time had slowed.
That's what it's like.
I rocked back on my heels.
I stood and whipped towards Sam.
I lunged for the gun.
Sammy caught my arms, pushing me back as I fought against him.
There was a sound trying to pierce through the overwhelming emptiness in my head. A sound that sounded a lot like a wounded animal. It's a sound I know well.
When Polly swam into view, putting my face between her hands, I realized that I was that sound. Something between a scream and a sob was falling out of me, and I couldn't stop it.
"Winnie. It's okay. It's gonna be okay," she sobbed with me.
I wrenched myself away from her. I couldn't, wouldn't, allow myself to be calmed down.
"What did you do to her?!" I screamed.
"She was possessed, Winnie."
"Don't call me that."
"By the time we got to her, it was too late. The demon had destroyed her body, and it was the only thing holding her together."
"STOP USING YOUR INSANE THEORIES AS AN EXCUSE FOR WHY YOU KILLED MY MOTHER!"
My chest heaved, and the two murdering bastards just stood there. They had the gall to even look sad. What did they have to be sad about? They're the ones going around killing people, claiming it's in the name of- of what? God? I didn't care.
"It's true, Winnie."
My breath came up short as I turned to look at Polly. Tears still streamed down her face, mingling with the blood. I noticed her lip was split, too, and added another tally to the scoreboard. I'd kill them.
"She was, she was different. She wasn't mom. She hit me. She tied me up. She tried to torture me, asking me questions that I didn't understand."
"No, Polly. These lunatics probably drugged you or something. THEY tortured you. They're feeding you their delusions."
"No, they aren't!" She shouted. "I saw it, okay? I saw her become that thing. I saw her eyes turn black. And I felt every moment she laid her hands on me. She was MY mom, Winnie. I knew her better than anyone, and I know that wasn't her."
Those words broke something deep inside of me, deeper than even Doris's death. Polly was right. Doris was her mother. Not mine. I looked at Dean, at Sammy, at the gun, my gun, that he was now holding in his hands, probably to keep me from putting a few rounds in the two of them.
I took a deep breath and simply said, "Fine."
And I left.
Authors note:
Yeah I made myself sad. I also feel like I used the word "Gun" so much. But really what else do I call it? Anyway. Supernatural ripped my heart out like twenty thousand times, so it's only fair I add some heartbreak to this story. Hope you like it!
2023.06.09 00:51 sandwich_with_a_hat i am sorry
NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. : Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. JANET BENSON: Barry! Breakfast is ready! BARRY: Coming! : Hang on a second. (Barry uses his antenna like a phone) : Hello? ADAM FLAYMAN:
(Through phone) - Barry? BARRY: - Adam? ADAM: - Can you believe this is happening? BARRY: - I can't. I'll pick you up. (Barry flies down the stairs) : MARTIN BENSON: Looking sharp. JANET: Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. BARRY: Sorry. I'm excited. MARTIN: Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. : A perfect report card, all B's. JANET: Very proud. (Rubs Barry's hair) BARRY= Ma! I got a thing going here. JANET: - You got lint on your fuzz. BARRY: - Ow! That's me!
JANET: - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! (Barry flies out the door) JANET: Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! (Barry drives through the hive,and is waved at by Adam who is reading a newspaper) BARRY== - Hey, Adam. ADAM: - Hey, Barry. (Adam gets in Barry's car) : - Is that fuzz gel? BARRY: - A little. Special day, graduation. ADAM: Never thought I'd make it. (Barry pulls away from the house and continues driving) BARRY: Three days grade school, three days high school... ADAM: Those were awkward. BARRY: Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. ADAM== You did come back different. (Barry and Adam pass by Artie, who is jogging) ARTIE: - Hi, Barry!
BARRY: - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. ADAM: - Hear about Frankie? BARRY: - Yeah. ADAM== - You going to the funeral? BARRY: - No, I'm not going to his funeral. : Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. : Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. ADAM: I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. (The car does a barrel roll on the loop-shaped bridge and lands on the highway) : I love this incorporating an amusement park into our regular day. BARRY: I guess that's why they say we don't need vacations. (Barry parallel parks the car and together they fly over the graduating students) Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. (Barry and Adam sit down and put on their hats) : - Well, Adam, today we are men.
ADAM: - We are! BARRY= - Bee-men. =ADAM= - Amen! BARRY AND ADAM: Hallelujah! (Barry and Adam both have a happy spasm) ANNOUNCER: Students, faculty, distinguished bees, : please welcome Dean Buzzwell. DEAN BUZZWELL: Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... : ...9: : That concludes our ceremonies. : And begins your career at Honex Industries! ADAM: Will we pick our job today? (Adam and Barry get into a tour bus) BARRY= I heard it's just orientation. (Tour buses rise out of the ground and the students are automatically loaded into the buses) TOUR GUIDE: Heads up! Here we go.
ANNOUNCER: Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. BARRY: - Wonder what it'll be like? ADAM: - A little scary. TOUR GUIDE== Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco : and a part of the Hexagon Group. Barry: This is it! BARRY AND ADAM: Wow. BARRY: Wow. (The bus drives down a road an on either side are the Bee's massive complicated Honey-making machines) TOUR GUIDE: We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life : to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. : Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. : Our top-secret formula : is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured : into this soothing sweet syrup : with its distinctive golden glow you know as... EVERYONE ON BUS: Honey! (The guide has been collecting honey into a bottle and she throws it into the crowd on the bus and it is caught by a girl in the back) ADAM: - That girl was hot. BARRY: - She's my cousin! ADAM== - She is? BARRY: - Yes, we're all cousins. ADAM: - Right. You're right. TOUR GUIDE: - At Honex, we constantly strive : to improve every aspect of bee existence. : These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. (The bus passes by a Bee wearing a helmet who is being smashed into the ground with fly-swatters, newspapers and boots. He lifts a thumbs up but you can hear him groan) : ADAM==
BARRY: You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? ADAM: Like what? Give me one example. (Barry and Adam stop walking and it is revealed to the audience that hundreds of cars are speeding by and narrowly missing them in perfect unison) BARRY: I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. ANNOUNCER: Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. BARRY: Wait a second. Check it out. (The Pollen jocks fly in, circle around and landing in line) : - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! ADAM: - Wow. : I've never seen them this close. BARRY: They know what it's like outside the hive. ADAM: Yeah, but some don't come back. GIRL BEES: - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! (The Pollen Jocks hook up their backpacks to machines that pump the nectar to trucks, which drive away)
LOU LO DUVA: You guys did great! : You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! (Punching the Pollen Jocks in joy) I love it! ADAM: - I wonder where they were. BARRY: - I don't know. : Their day's not planned. : Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. : You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. ADAM== Right. (Barry and Adam are covered in some pollen that floated off of the Pollen Jocks) BARRY: Look at that. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. ADAM: It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. BARRY: Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. (Barry waves at 2 girls standing a little away from them)
ADAM== Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? BARRY: Distant. Distant. POLLEN JOCK #1: Look at these two. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Couple of Hive Harrys. POLLEN JOCK #1: - Let's have fun with them. GIRL BEE #1: It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. BARRY: Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! : He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! (Slaps Adam with his hand to represent his scenario) GIRL BEE #2: - Oh, my! BARRY: - I never thought I'd knock him out. GIRL BEE #1: (Looking at Adam) What were you doing during this? ADAM: Obviously I was trying to alert the authorities. BARRY: I can autograph that.
(The pollen jocks walk up to Barry and Adam, they pretend that Barry and Adam really are pollen jocks.) POLLEN JOCK #1: A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? BARRY: Yeah. Gusty. POLLEN JOCK #1: We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. BARRY: - Six miles, huh? ADAM: - Barry! POLLEN JOCK #2: A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. BARRY: - Maybe I am. ADAM: - You are not! POLLEN JOCK #1: We're going 0900 at J-Gate. : What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? BARRY: I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. (The scene cuts to Barry looking out on the hive-city from his balcony at night) MARTIN:
Hey, Honex! BARRY: Dad, you surprised me. MARTIN: You decide what you're interested in? BARRY: - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. : Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? MARTIN: Son, let me tell you about stirring. : You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. : You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. BARRY: You know, Dad, the more I think about it, : maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. MARTIN: You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? : That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. :
Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! JANET: - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. BARRY: - I'm not trying to be funny. MARTIN: You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! JANET: - You're gonna be a stirrer? BARRY: - No one's listening to me! MARTIN: Wait till you see the sticks I have. BARRY: I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! (Barry's parents don't listen to him and continue to ramble on) MARTIN: Let's open some honey and celebrate! BARRY: Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. : Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! JANET: I'm so proud. (The scene cuts to Barry and Adam waiting in line to get a job) ADAM: - We're starting work today!
BARRY: - Today's the day. ADAM: Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. BARRY: Yeah, right. JOB LISTER: Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Is it still available? JOB LISTER: - Hang on. Two left! : One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. ADAM: - What'd you get? BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Picking crud out. Stellar! (He walks away) ADAM: Wow! JOB LISTER: Couple of newbies? ADAM: Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! JOB LISTER: Make your choice. (Adam and Barry look up at the job board. There are hundreds of constantly changing panels that contain available or unavailable jobs. It looks very confusing)
ADAM: - You want to go first? BARRY: - No, you go. ADAM: Oh, my. What's available? JOB LISTER: Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. ADAM: - Any chance of getting the Krelman? JOB LISTER: - Sure, you're on. (Puts the Krelman finger-hat on Adam's head) (Suddenly the sign for Krelman closes out) : I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. (Takes Adam's hat off) Wax monkey's always open. ADAM: The Krelman opened up again. : What happened? JOB LISTER: A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. : Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. : Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!
ADAM: Oh, this is so hard! (Barry remembers what the Pollen Jock offered him and he flies off) Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, : humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, : mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? (Adam turns around and sees Barry flying away) : Barry! POLLEN JOCK: All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... ADAM: (Through phone) What happened to you? Where are you? BARRY: - I'm going out. ADAM: - Out? Out where? BARRY: - Out there. ADAM: - Oh, no! BARRY: I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. ADAM:
You're gonna die! You're crazy! (Barry hangs up) Hello? POLLEN JOCK #2: Another call coming in. : If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd : that gets their roses today. BARRY: Hey, guys. POLLEN JOCK #1 == - Look at that. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? LOU LO DUVA: Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. POLLEN JOCK #1: It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. (Puts hand on Barry's shoulder) LOU LO DUVA: (To Barry) Really? Feeling lucky, are you? BEE WITH CLIPBOARD: (To Barry) Sign here, here. Just initial that. : - Thank you. LOU LO DUVA: - OK. : You got a rain advisory today, :
and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. : So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, : hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. : Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. : Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! BARRY: - That's awful. LOU LO DUVA: (Still talking through megaphone) - And a reminder for you rookies, : bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! : All right, launch positions! POLLEN JOCKS: (The Pollen Jocks run into formation) : Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! LOU LU DUVA: Black and yellow! POLLEN JOCKS:
Hello! POLLEN JOCK #1: (To Barry)You ready for this, hot shot? BARRY: Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. POLLEN JOCK's: Wind, check. : - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. : - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. BARRY: Scared out of my shorts, check. LOU LO DUVA: OK, ladies, : let's move it out! : Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! : All of you, drain those flowers! (The pollen jocks fly out of the hive) BARRY: Wow! I'm out! : I can't believe I'm out! : So blue.
: I feel so fast and free! : Box kite! (Barry flies through the kite) : Wow! : Flowers! (A pollen jock puts on some high tech goggles that shows flowers similar to heat sink goggles.) POLLEN JOCK: This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. : Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. : Roses! POLLEN JOCK #1: 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. : Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. (The pollen jock fires a high-tech gun at the flower, shooting tubes that suck up the nectar from the flower and collects it into a pouch on the gun) BARRY: That is one nectar collector! POLLEN JOCK #1== - Ever see pollination up close? BARRY: - No, sir. POLLEN JOCK #1:
(Barry and the Pollen jock fly over the field, the pollen jock sprinkles pollen as he goes) : I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, : a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. BARRY: That's amazing. Why do we do that? POLLEN JOCK #1: That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. BARRY: Cool. POLLEN JOCK #1: I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. could be daisies. Don't we need those? POLLEN JOCK #2: Copy that visual. : Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. POLLEN JOCK #1: Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? POLLEN JOCK #2: Affirmative. (The Pollen jocks land near the "flowers" which, to the audience are obviously just tennis balls) KEN: (In the distance) That was on the line!
POLLEN JOCK #1: This is the coolest. What is it? POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't know, but I'm loving this color. : It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. POLLEN JOCK #1: Yeah, fuzzy. (Sticks his hand on the ball but it gets stuck) POLLEN JOCK #3== Chemical-y. (The pollen jock finally gets his hand free from the tennis ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. (The pollen jocks turn around and see Barry lying his entire body on top of one of the tennis balls) POLLEN JOCK #2: My sweet lord of bees! POLLEN JOCK #3: Candy-brain, get off there! POLLEN JOCK #1: (Pointing upwards) Problem! (A human hand reaches down and grabs the tennis ball that Barry is stuck to) BARRY: - Guys! POLLEN JOCK #2: - This could be bad. POLLEN JOCK #3: Affirmative. (Vanessa Bloome starts bouncing the tennis ball, not knowing Barry is stick to it)
BARRY== Very close. : Gonna hurt. : Mama's little boy. (Barry is being hit back and forth by two humans playing tennis. He is still stuck to the ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: You are way out of position, rookie! KEN: Coming in at you like a MISSILE! (Barry flies past the pollen jocks, still stuck to the ball) BARRY: (In slow motion) Help me! POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't think these are flowers. POLLEN JOCK #3: - Should we tell him? POLLEN JOCK #1: - I think he knows. BARRY: What is this?! KEN: Match point! : You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to EAT IT! (A pollen jock coughs which confused Ken and he hits the ball the wrong way with Barry stuck to it and it goes flying into the city) BARRY:
Yowser! (Barry bounces around town and gets stuck in the engine of a car. He flies into the air conditioner and sees a bug that was frozen in there) BARRY: Ew, gross. (The man driving the car turns on the air conditioner which blows Barry into the car) GIRL IN CAR: There's a bee in the car! : - Do something! DAD DRIVING CAR: - I'm driving! BABY GIRL: (Waving at Barry) - Hi, bee. (Barry smiles and waves at the baby girl) GUY IN BACK OF CAR: - He's back here! : He's going to sting me! GIRL IN CAR: Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! (Barry freezes as well, hovering in the middle of the car) : GRANDMA IN CAR== He blinked! (The grandma whips out some bee-spray and sprays everywhere in the car, climbing into the front seat, still trying to spray Barry) GIRL IN CAR: Spray him, Granny! DAD DRIVING THE CAR: What are you doing?! (Barry escapes the car through the air conditioner and is flying high above
the ground, safe.) BARRY: Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. (Barry sees that storm clouds are gathering and he can see rain clouds moving into this direction) : I gotta get home. : Can't fly in rain. : Can't fly in rain. (A rain drop hits Barry and one of his wings is damaged) : Can't fly in rain. (A second rain drop hits Barry again and he spirals downwards) Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! (WW2 plane sound effects are played as he plummets, and he crash-lands on a plant inside an apartment near the window) VANESSA BLOOME: Ken, could you close the window please? KEN== Hey, check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. : You see? (Folds brochure resume out) Folds out. (Ken closes the window, trapping Barry inside) BARRY: Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. (Barry tries to fly away but smashes into the window and falls again) : What was that?
(Barry keeps trying to fly out the window but he keeps being knocked back because the window is closed) Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... : Drapes! (Barry taps the glass. He doesn't understand what it is) That is diabolical. KEN: It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. ANDY: What's number one? Star Wars? KEN: Nah, I don't go for that... (Ken makes finger guns and makes "pew pew pew" sounds and then stops) : ...kind of stuff. BARRY: No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. KEN: When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. BARRY: (Looking at the light on the ceiling) There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. (Starts flying towards the lightbulb) : I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. (Barry hits the lightbulb and falls into the dip on the table that the humans are sitting at) KEN:
I predicted global warming. : I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. (Andy dips a chip into the bowl and scoops up some dip with Barry on it and is about to put it in his mouth) : Wait! Stop! Bee! (Andy drops the chip with Barry in fear and backs away. All the humans freak out) : Stand back. These are winter boots. (Ken has winter boots on his hands and he is about to smash the bee but Vanessa saves him last second) VANESSA: Wait! : Don't kill him! (Vanessa puts Barry in a glass to protect him) KEN: You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! VANESSA: Why does his life have less value than yours? KEN: Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? VANESSA: I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. (Vanessa picks up Ken's brochure and puts it under the glass so she can carry Barry back to the window. Barry looks at Vanessa in amazement) KEN:
My brochure! VANESSA: There you go, little guy. (Vanessa opens the window and lets Barry out but Barry stays back and is still shocked that a human saved his life) KEN: I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. VANESSA: Put that on your resume brochure. KEN: My whole face could puff up. ANDY: Make it one of your special skills. KEN: Knocking someone out is also a special skill. (Ken walks to the door) Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. : - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? VANESSA: - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. : (Vanessa tries to close door) KEN== - You could put carob chips on there. VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door but Ken opens it again) KEN: - Supposed to be less calories.
VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door) (Fast forward to the next day, Barry is still inside the house. He flies into the kitchen where Vanessa is doing dishes) BARRY== (Talking to himself) I gotta say something. : She saved my life. I gotta say something. : All right, here it goes. (Turns back) Nah. : What would I say? : I could really get in trouble. : It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. : I can't believe I'm doing this. : I've got to. (Barry disguises himself as a character on a food can as Vanessa walks by again) : Oh, I can't do it. Come on! : No. Yes. No. : Do it. I can't.
: How should I start it? (Barry strikes a pose and wiggles his eyebrows) "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. (Vanessa is about to walk past Barry) Here she comes! Speak, you fool! : ...Hi! (Vanessa gasps and drops the dishes in fright and notices Barry on the counter) : I'm sorry. VANESSA: - You're talking. BARRY: - Yes, I know. VANESSA: (Pointing at Barry) You're talking! BARRY: I'm so sorry. VANESSA: No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. : But I don't recall going to bed. BARRY: Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. VANESSA: This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!
BARRY: I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, (Pointing to the living room where Ken tried to kill him last night) but they were all trying to kill me. : And if it wasn't for you... : I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. (Vanessa stabs her hand with a fork to test whether she's dreaming or not) : That was a little weird. VANESSA: - I'm talking with a bee. BARRY: - Yeah. VANESSA: I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! BARRY: I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. (Barry turns to leave) VANESSA: - Wait! How did you learn to do that? BARRY: (Flying back) - What? VANESSA: The talking...thing. BARRY:
Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. VANESSA: - That's very funny. BARRY: - Yeah. : Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. : Anyway... VANESSA: Can I... : ...get you something? BARRY: - Like what? VANESSA: I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? BARRY: I don't want to put you out. VANESSA: It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. : - It's just coffee. BARRY: - I hate to impose. (Vanessa starts making coffee) VANESSA: - Don't be ridiculous!
BARRY: - Actually, I would love a cup. VANESSA: Hey, you want rum cake? BARRY: - I shouldn't. VANESSA: - Have some. BARRY: - No, I can't. VANESSA: - Come on! BARRY: I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. VANESSA: - Where? BARRY: - These stripes don't help. VANESSA: You look great! BARRY: I don't know if you know anything about fashion. : Are you all right? VANESSA: (Pouring coffee on the floor and missing the cup completely) No. (Flash forward in time. Barry and Vanessa are sitting together at a table on top of the apartment building drinking coffee)
: BARRY== He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. : He finally gets there. : He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. : And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. : Why would I marry a watermelon?" (Barry laughs but Vanessa looks confused) VANESSA: Is that a bee joke? BARRY: That's the kind of stuff we do. VANESSA: Yeah, different. : So, what are you gonna do, Barry? (Barry stands on top of a sugar cube floating in his coffee and paddles it around with a straw like it's a gondola) BARRY: About work? I don't know. : I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. VANESSA: I know how you feel.
BARRY: - You do? VANESSA: - Sure. : My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. BARRY: - Really? VANESSA: - My only interest is flowers. BARRY: Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. : Anyway, if you look... (Barry points to a tree in the middle of Central Park) : There's my hive right there. See it? VANESSA: You're in Sheep Meadow! BARRY: Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! VANESSA: No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. BARRY: - Why do girls put rings on their toes? VANESSA: - Why not? BARRY:
ADAM: You did? Was she Bee-ish? : - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! BARRY: - No, no, no, not a wasp. ADAM: - Spider? BARRY: - I'm not attracted to spiders. : I know, for everyone else, it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. : I can't get by that face. ADAM: So who is she? BARRY: She's... human. ADAM: No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. BARRY: - Her name's Vanessa. (Adam puts his head in his hands) ADAM: - Oh, boy. BARRY== She's so nice. And she's a florist! ADAM: Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!
BARRY: We're not dating. ADAM: You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes : with power washers and M-80s! That's one-eighth a stick of dynamite! BARRY: She saved my life! And she understands me. ADAM: This is over! BARRY: Eat this. (Barry gives Adam a piece of the crumb that he got from Vanessa. Adam eats it) ADAM: (Adam's tone changes) This is not over! What was that? BARRY: - They call it a crumb. ADAM: - It was so stingin' stripey! BARRY: And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! : - You know what a Cinnabon is? ADAM: - No. (Adam opens a door behind him and he pulls Barry in)
BARRY: It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. ADAM: Be quiet! BARRY: They heat it up... ADAM: Sit down! (Adam forces Barry to sit down) BARRY: (Still rambling about Cinnabons) ...really hot! (Adam grabs Barry by the shoulders) ADAM: - Listen to me! : We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! BARRY== Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? ADAM: There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! : You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! BARRY: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEE: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEES AND ADAM: Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! (Flash forward in time; Barry is laying on a raft in a pool full of honey. He is wearing sunglasses) JANET: There he is. He's in the pool. MARTIN: You know what your problem is, Barry? (Barry pulls down his sunglasses and he looks annoyed) BARRY: (Sarcastic) I gotta start thinking bee? JANET: How much longer will this go on? MARTIN: It's been three days! Why aren't you working? (Puts sunglasses back on) BARRY: I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. MARTIN: What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! JANET: Would it kill you to make a little honey? (Barry rolls off the raft and sinks into the honey pool) : Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. : Martin, would you talk to him? MARTIN:
Barry, I'm talking to you! (Barry keeps sinking into the honey until he is suddenly in Central Park having a picnic with Vanessa) (Barry has a cup of honey and he clinks his glass with Vanessas. Suddenly a mosquito lands on Vanessa and she slaps it, killing it. They both gasp but then burst out laughing) VANESSA: You coming? (The camera pans over and Vanessa is climbing into a small yellow airplane) BARRY: Got everything? VANESSA: All set! BARRY: Go ahead. I'll catch up. (Vanessa lifts off and flies ahead) VANESSA: Don't be too long. (Barry catches up with Vanessa and he sticks out his arms like ana irplane. He rolls from side to side, and Vanessa copies him with the airplane) VANESSA: Watch this! (Barry stays back and watches as Vanessa draws a heart in the air using pink smoke from the plane, but on the last loop-the-loop she suddenly crashes into a mountain and the plane explodes. The destroyed plane falls into some rocks and explodes a second time) BARRY: Vanessa! (As Barry is yelling his mouth fills with honey and he wakes up, discovering that he was just day dreaming. He slowly sinks back into the honey pool) MARTIN: - We're still here.
JANET: - I told you not to yell at him. : He doesn't respond to yelling! MARTIN: - Then why yell at me? JANET: - Because you don't listen! MARTIN: I'm not listening to this. BARRY: Sorry, I've gotta go. MARTIN: - Where are you going? BARRY: - I'm meeting a friend. JANET: A girl? Is this why you can't decide? BARRY: Bye. (Barry flies out the door and Martin shakes his head) : JANET== I just hope she's Bee-ish. (Fast forward in time and Barry is sitting on Vanessa's shoulder and she is closing up her shop) BARRY: They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? VANESSA: To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!
: Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. BARRY: A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? VANESSA: No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? BARRY: It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. VANESSA: Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. BARRY: TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! VANESSA: You don't have that? BARRY: We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. VANESSA: Oh, my. (A human walks by and Barry narrowly avoids him) PASSERBY: Dumb bees! VANESSA: You must want to sting all those jerks. BARRY: We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us. VANESSA: So you have to watch your temper (They walk into a store) BARRY: Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, : write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: : Anger, jealousy, lust. (Suddenly an employee(Hector) hits Barry off of Vanessa's shoulder. Hector thinks he's saving Vanessa) VANESSA: (To Barry) Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? (Barry is getting up off the floor) BARRY: Yeah. VANESSA: (To Hector) - What is wrong with you?! HECTOR: (Confused) - It's a bug. VANESSA: He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! (Vanessa hits Hector across the face with the magazine he had and then hits him in the head. Hector backs away covering his head) Barry: What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? (Vanessa sets Barry back on her shoulder)
VANESSA: Yeah, it was. How did you know? BARRY: It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. VANESSA: You've really got that down to a science. BARRY: - Oh, we have to. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. VANESSA: - I'll bet. (Barry looks to his right and notices there is honey for sale in the aisle) BARRY: What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? (Barry looks at all the brands of honey, shocked) How did this get here? Cute Bee, Golden Blossom, : Ray Liotta Private Select? (Barry puts his hands up and slowly turns around, a look of disgust on his face) VANESSA: - Is he that actor? BARRY: - I never heard of him. : - Why is this here? VANESSA: - For people. We eat it. BARRY:
You don't have enough food of your own?! (Hector looks back and notices that Vanessa is talking to Barry) VANESSA: - Well, yes. BARRY: - How do you get it? VANESSA: - Bees make it. BARRY: - I know who makes it! : And it's hard to make it! : There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! VANESSA: - It's organic. BARRY: - It's our-ganic! VANESSA: It's just honey, Barry. BARRY: Just what?! : Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! : You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! :
And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. : I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! (Flash forward in time; Barry paints his face with black strikes like a soldier and sneaks into the storage section of the store) (Two men, including Hector, are loading boxes into some trucks) : SUPERMARKET EMPLOYEE== Hey, Hector. : - You almost done? HECTOR: - Almost. (Barry takes a step to peak around the corner) (Whispering) He is here. I sense it. : Well, I guess I'll go home now (Hector pretends to walk away by walking in place and speaking loudly) : and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. BARRY: You're busted, box boy! HECTOR: I knew I heard something! So you can talk! BARRY: I can talk. And now you'll start talking! : Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier? HECTOR: I don't understand. I thought we were friends. : The last thing we want to do is upset bees! (Hector takes a thumbtack out of the board behind him and sword-fights Barry. Barry is using his stinger like a sword) : You're too late! It's ours now! BARRY: You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! HECTOR: You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! (Barry hits the thumbtack out of Hectors hand and Hector surrenders) Barry: Where is the honey coming from? : Tell me where! HECTOR: (Pointing to leaving truck) Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! (Barry chases after the truck but it is getting away. He flies onto a bicyclists' backpack and he catches up to the truck) CAR DRIVER: (To bicyclist) Crazy person! (Barry flies off and lands on the windshield of the Honey farms truck. Barry looks around and sees dead bugs splattered everywhere) BARRY: What horrible thing has happened here?
: These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now : they're on the road to nowhere! (Barry hears a sudden whisper) (Barry looks up and sees Mooseblood, a mosquito playing dead) MOOSEBLOOD: Just keep still. BARRY: What? You're not dead? MOOSEBLOOD: Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? BARRY: To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. MOOSEBLOOD: I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! ANOTHER BUG PLAYING DEAD: I'm going to Tacoma. (Barry looks at another bug) BARRY: - And you? MOOSEBLOOD: - He really is dead. BARRY: All right. (Another bug hits the windshield and the drivers notice. They activate the windshield wipers) MOOSEBLOOD== Uh-oh! (The windshield wipers are slowly sliding over the dead bugs and wiping
them off) BARRY: - What is that?! MOOSEBLOOD: - Oh, no! : - A wiper! Triple blade! BARRY: - Triple blade? MOOSEBLOOD: Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! (Mooseblood and Barry grab onto the wiper and they hold on as it wipes the windshield) Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! : How much do you people need to see?! (Bangs on windshield) : Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! RADIO IN TRUCK: From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. MOOSEBLOOD: But don't kill no more bugs! (Mooseblood and Barry are washed off by the wipr fluid) MOOSEBLOOD: - Bee! BARRY: - Moose blood guy!! (Barry starts screaming as he hangs onto the antenna) (Suddenly it is revealed that a water bug is also hanging on the antenna.
There is a pause and then Barry and the water bug both start screaming) TRUCK DRIVER: - You hear something? GUY IN TRUCK: - Like what? TRUCK DRIVER: Like tiny screaming. GUY IN TRUCK: Turn off the radio. (The antenna starts to lower until it gets to low and sinks into the truck. The water bug flies off and Barry is forced to let go and he is blown away. He luckily lands inside a horn on top of the truck where he finds Mooseblood, who was blown into the same place) MOOSEBLOOD: Whassup, bee boy? BARRY: Hey, Blood. (Fast forward in time and we see that Barry is deep in conversation with Mooseblood. They have been sitting in this truck for a while) BARRY: ...Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. MOOSEBLOOD: Wow! BARRY: I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. : I mean, that honey's ours. MOOSEBLOOD: - Bees hang tight. BARRY:
BEEKEEPER #2: They make the honey, and we make the money. BARRY: "They make the honey, and we make the money"? (The Beekeeper sprays hundreds of cheap miniature apartments with the smoker. The bees are fainting or passing out) Oh, my! : What's going on? Are you OK? (Barry flies into one of the apartment and helps a Bee couple get off the ground. They are coughing and its hard for them to stand) BEE IN APARTMENT: Yeah. It doesn't last too long. BARRY: Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? BEE IN APPARTMENT: Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. (The apartment room is completely empty except for a photo on the wall of the "queen" who is obviously a man in women's clothes) BARRY: This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! : That's a drag queen! : What is this? (Barry flies out and he discovers that there are hundreds of these structures, each housing thousands of Bees) Oh, no! : There's hundreds of them! (Barry takes out his camera and takes pictures of these Bee work camps. The beekeepers look very evil in these depictions)
Bee honey. : Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! : This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. (Flash forward in time and Barry is showing these pictures to his parents) JANET: Oh, Barry, stop. MARTIN: Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. BARRY: Do these look like rumors? (Holds up the pictures) UNCLE CARL: That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. JANET: How did you get mixed up in this? ADAM: He's been talking to humans. JANET: - What? MARTIN: - Talking to humans?! ADAM: He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! JANET: Make out? Barry!
BARRY: We do not. ADAM: - You wish you could. MARTIN: - Whose side are you on? BARRY: The bees! UNCLE CARL: (He has been sitting in the back of the room this entire time) I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. JANET: Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? BARRY: I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! : Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked : your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. JANET: I remember that. BARRY: What right do they have to our honey? : We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!
ADAM: Even if it's true, what can one bee do? BARRY: Sting them where it really hurts. MARTIN: In the face! The eye! : - That would hurt. BARRY: - No. MARTIN: Up the nose? That's a killer. BARRY: There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. (Flash forward a bit in time and we are watching the Bee News) BEE NEWS NARRATOR: Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. BEE PROTESTOR: No more bee beards! BEE NEWS NARRATOR: With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. : Weather with Storm Stinger. : Sports with Buzz Larvi. : And Jeanette Chung. BOB BUMBLE: - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. JEANETTE CHUNG:
Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. KEN: But it's our yogurt night! VANESSA: (Holding door open for Ken) Bye-bye. KEN: (Yelling) Why is yogurt night so difficult?! (Ken leaves and Vanessa walks over to Barry. His workplace is a mess) VANESSA: You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! BARRY: Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. ADAM: - Frosting... - How many sugars? ==BARRY== Just one. I try not to use the competition. : So why are you helping me? VANESSA: Bees have good qualities. : And it takes my mind off the shop. : Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. BARRY:
Those are great, if you're three. VANESSA: And artificial flowers. BARRY: - Oh, those just get me psychotic! VANESSA: - Yeah, me too. : BARRY: Bent stingers, pointless pollination. ADAM: Bees must hate those fake things! : Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. : Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. VANESSA: - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. BARRY: - I guess. ADAM: You sure you want to go through with it? BARRY: Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able : to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! (Flash forward in time and we are watching the human news. The camera shows
a crowd outside a courthouse) NEWS REPORTER: It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, : where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, : we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. (We are no longer watching through a news camera) ADAM: What have we gotten into here, Barry? BARRY: It's pretty big, isn't it? ADAM== (Looking at the hundreds of people around the courthouse) I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. BARRY: You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? SECURITY GUARD: Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. (A limousine drives up and a fat man,Layton Montgomery, a honey industry owner gets out and walks past Barry) ADAM: - What's the matter? BARRY: - I don't know, I just got a chill. (Fast forward in time and everyone is in the court) MONTGOMERY: Well, if it isn't the bee team.
(To Honey Industry lawyers) You boys work on this? MAN: All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. JUDGE BUMBLETON: All right. Case number 4475, : Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry : is now in session. : Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? MONTGOMERY: A privilege. JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? (Everyone looks closely, they are waiting to see if a Bee can really talk) (Barry makes several buzzing sounds to sound like a Bee) BARRY: I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. JUDGE BUMBLBETON: Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. MONTGOMERY: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, : my grandmother was a simple woman. :
Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right : to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. : If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, : just think of what would it mean. : I would have to negotiate with the silkworm : for the elastic in my britches! : Talking bee! (Montgomery walks over and looks closely at Barry) : How do we know this isn't some sort of : holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? : They could be using laser beams! : Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, : he could be on steroids! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson?
BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. : I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. : It's important to all bees. We invented it! : We make it. And we protect it with our lives. : Unfortunately, there are some people in this room : who think they can take it from us : 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, : you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have : but everything we are! JANET== (To Martin) I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Call your first witness. BARRY: So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have. KLAUSS VANDERHAYDEN: I suppose so. BARRY: I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! KLAUSS: Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. BARRY: Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. : I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? KLAUSS: (Quietly) - No. BARRY: - I couldn't hear you. KLAUSS: - No. BARRY: - No. : Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, : it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. KLAUSS: They're very lovable creatures.
: Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. BARRY: You mean like this? (The bear from Over The Hedge barges in through the back door and it is roaring and standing on its hind legs. It is thrashing its claws and people are screaming. It is being held back by a guard who has the bear on a chain) : (Pointing to the roaring bear) Bears kill bees! : How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! : Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! JUDGE BUMBLETON: OK, that's enough. Take him away. (The bear stops roaring and thrashing and walks out) BARRY: So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. : - Where have I heard it before? MR. STING: - I was with a band called The Police. BARRY: But you've never been a police officer, have you? STING: No, I haven't. BARRY:
No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example : of bee culture casually stolen by a human : for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. STING: Oh, please. BARRY: Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? : Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. : Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! MONTGOMERY: That's not his real name?! You idiots! BARRY: Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on : your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. RAY LIOTTA: Thank you. Thank you. BARRY: I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome : with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow. RAY LIOTTA: I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? BARRY: Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? : Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't : have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? RAY LIOTTA: Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! BARRY: This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! (Ray Liotta looses it and tries to grab Barry) RAY LIOTTA: Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! JUDGE BUMBLETON: - Order in this court! RAY LIOTTA: - You're all thinking it! (Judge Bumbleton starts banging her gavel) JUDGE BUMBLETON: Order! Order, I say! RAY LIOTTA: - Say it! MAN:
KEN: Do we? BARRY: Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. KEN: (Menacingly) That's just what I was thinking about doing. (Ken reaches for a fork on the table but knocks if on the floor. He goes to pick it up) VANESSA: Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. (Ken quickly rises back up after hearing this but hits his head on the table and yells) BARRY: I'm going to drain the old stinger. KEN: Yeah, you do that. (Barry flies past Ken to get to the bathroom and Ken freaks out, splashing some of the wine he was using to cool his head in his eyes. He yells in anger) (Barry looks at the magazines featuring his victories in court) BARRY: Look at that. (Barry flies into the bathroom) (He puts his hand on his head but this makes hurts him and makes him even madder. He yells again) (Barry is washing his hands in the sink but then Ken walks in) KEN: You know, you know I've just about had it (Closes bathroom door behind him) with your little mind games. (Ken is menacingly rolling up a magazine) BARRY:
(Backing away) - What's that? KEN: - Italian Vogue. BARRY: Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. KEN: It's a lot of ads. BARRY: Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? KEN: That's funny, I just can't seem to recall that! (Ken smashes everything off the sink with the magazine and Barry narrowly escapes) (Ken follows Barry around and tries to hit him with the magazine but he keeps missing) (Ken gets a spray bottle) : I think something stinks in here! BARRY: (Enjoying the spray) I love the smell of flowers. (Ken holds a lighter in front of the spray bottle) KEN: How do you like the smell of flames?! BARRY: Not as much. (Ken fires his make-shift flamethrower but misses Barry, burning the bathroom. He torches the whole room but looses his footing and falls into the bathtub. After getting hit in the head by falling objects 3 times he picks up the shower head, revealing a Water bug hiding under it) WATER BUG: Water bug! Not taking sides!
(Barry gets up out of a pile of bathroom supplies and he is wearing a chapstick hat) BARRY: Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! (Ken switches the shower head to lethal) KEN: I've got issues! (Ken sprays Barry with the shower head and he crash lands into the toilet) (Ken menacingly looks down into the toilet at Barry) Well, well, well, a royal flush! BARRY: - You're bluffing. KEN: - Am I? (flushes toilet) (Barry grabs a chapstick from the toilet seat and uses it to surf in the flushing toilet) BARRY: Surf's up, dude! (Barry flies out of the toilet on the chapstick and sprays Ken's face with the toilet water) : EW,Poo water! BARRY: That bowl is gnarly. KEN: (Aiming a toilet cleaner at Barry) Except for those dirty yellow rings! (Barry cowers and covers his head and Vanessa runs in and takes the toilet cleaner from Ken just before he hits Barry) VANESSA: Kenneth! What are you doing?! KEN== (Leaning towards Barry)
You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! VANESSA: We need to talk! (Vanessa pulls Ken out of the bathroom) : He's just a little bee! : And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! KEN: Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? VANESSA: No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! KEN: Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... : My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! VANESSA: Goodbye, Ken. (Ken huffs and walks out and slams the door. But suddenly he walks back in and stares at Barry) : And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners MADE BY MAN! (Ken leaves again and Vanessa leans in towards Barry) VANESSA: I'm sorry about all that. (Ken walks back in again)
KEN: I know it's got an aftertaste! I LIKE IT! (Ken leaves for the last time) VANESSA: I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. : I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. : Are you OK for the trial? BARRY: I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. (Flash forward in time and Barry, Adam, and Vanessa are back in court) MONTGOMERY-- We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. ADAM: Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... (Barry stares at Adam) ...Yeah. LAWYER: Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. MONTGOMERY: Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around : is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. (To lawyer)
: Order, please! (Flash forward in time and we see a human news reporter) NEWS REPORTER: The case of the honeybees versus the human race : took a pointed turn against the bees : yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. (Adam is laying in a hospital bed and Barry flies in to see him) BARRY: - Hey, buddy. ADAM: - Hey. BARRY: - Is there much pain? ADAM: - Yeah. : I... : I blew the whole case, didn't I? BARRY: It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. ADAM: I'd be better off dead. Look at me. (A small plastic sword is replaced as Adam's stinger) They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.
: Look, there's a little celery still on it. (Flicks off the celery and sighs) BARRY: What was it like to sting someone? ADAM: I can't explain it. It was all... : All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! BARRY: ...All right. ADAM: You think it was all a trap? BARRY: Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. : What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. ADAM: What will the humans do to us if they win? BARRY: I don't know. ADAM: I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. BARRY: Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!
ADAM: Oh, my. (Coughs) Could you get a nurse to close that window? BARRY: - Why? ADAM: - The smoke. (We can see that two humans are smoking cigarettes outside) : Bees don't smoke. BARRY: Right. Bees don't smoke. : Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. : That's it! That's our case! ADAM: It is? It's not over? BARRY: Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. : Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. (Flash forward in time and Adam is making a paper boat in the courtroom) ADAM: And assuming you've done step 29 correctly, you're ready for the tub! (We see that the jury have each made their own paper boats after being taught how by Adam. They all look confused) JUDGE BUMBLETON:
Mr. Flayman. ADAM: Yes? Yes, Your Honor! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Where is the rest of your team? ADAM: (Continues stalling) Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. : Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, : and as a result, we don't make very good time. : I actually heard a funny story about... MONTGOMERY: Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs : taken up enough of this court's valuable time? : How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? : They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges : against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. : I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going : to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. ADAM: But you can't! We have a terrific case. MONTGOMERY: Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? : Show me the smoking gun! BARRY: (Barry flies in through the door) Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? : Here is your smoking gun. (Vanessa walks in holding a bee smoker. She sets it down on the Judge's podium) JUDGE BUMBLETON: What is that? BARRY: It's a bee smoker! MONTGOMERY: (Picks up smoker) What, this? This harmless little contraption? : This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. (Montgomery accidentally fires it at the bees in the crowd and they faint
and cough) (Dozens of reporters start taking pictures of the suffering bees) BARRY: Look at what has happened : to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" : Is this what nature intended for us? : To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines : and man-made wooden slat work camps? : Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? (Barry points to the honey industry owners. One of them is an African American so he awkwardly separates himself from the others) LAWYER: - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! ADAM AND VANESSA: Free the bees! Free the bees! BEES IN CROWD: Free the bees! HUMAN JURY: Free the bees! Free the bees! JUDGE BUMBLETON: The court finds in favor of the bees!
BARRY: Vanessa, we won! VANESSA: I knew you could do it! High-five! (Vanessa hits Barry hard because her hand is too big) : Sorry. BARRY: (Overjoyed) I'm OK! You know what this means? : All the honey will finally belong to the bees. : Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. MONTGOMERY: This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. : You'll regret this. (Montgomery leaves and Barry goes outside the courtroom. Several reporters start asking Barry questions) REPORTER 1#: Barry, how much honey is out there? BARRY: All right. One at a time. REPORTER 2#: Barry, who are you wearing? BARRY: My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.
(Barry flies outside with the paparazzi and Adam and Vanessa stay back) ADAM: (To Vanessa) - What if Montgomery's right? Vanessa: - What do you mean? ADAM: We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to a man) BUSINESS MAN: Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? BARRY: First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. (As Barry is talking we see a montage of men putting "closed" tape over the work camps and freeing the bees in the crappy apartments) Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, : every last drop. (Men in suits are pushing all the honey of the aisle and into carts) We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more (We see a statue of a bear-shaped honey container being pulled down by bees) than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. : We're all aware of what they do in the woods. (We see Winnie the Pooh sharing his honey with Piglet in the cross-hairs of a high-tech sniper rifle) BARRY: (Looking through binoculars)
Wait for my signal. : Take him out. (Winnie gets hit by a tranquilizer dart and dramatically falls off the log he was standing on, his tongue hanging out. Piglet looks at Pooh in fear and the Sniper takes the honey.) SNIPER: He'll have nausea for a few hours, then he'll be fine. (Flash forward in time) BARRY: And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... (Mr. Sting is sitting at home until he is taken out of his house by the men in suits) STING: But it's just a prance-about stage name! BARRY: ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products : and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. (An old lady is mixing honey into her tea but suddenly men in suits smash her face down on the table and take the honey) OLD LADY: Can't breathe. (A honey truck pulls up to Barry's hive) WORKER: Bring it in, boys! : Hold it right there! Good. : Tap it.
(Tons of honey is being pumped into the hive's storage) BEE WORKER 1#: (Honey overflows from the cup) Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! : - I think we need to shut down! =BEE WORKER #2= - Shut down? We've never shut down. : Shut down honey production! DEAN BUZZWELL: Stop making honey! (The bees all leave their stations. Two bees run into a room and they put the keys into a machine) Turn your key, sir! (Two worker bees dramatically turn their keys, which opens the button which they press, shutting down the honey-making machines. This is the first time this has ever happened) BEE: ...What do we do now? (Flash forward in time and a Bee is about to jump into a pool full of honey) Cannonball! (The bee gets stuck in the honey and we get a short montage of Bees leaving work) (We see the Pollen Jocks flying but one of them gets a call on his antenna) LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") We're shutting honey production! : Mission abort. POLLEN JOCK #1: Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. (The Pollen Jocks fly back to the hive)
(We get a time lapse of Central Park slowly wilting away as the bees all relax) BARRY: Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. ADAM: Oh, yeah? BARRY: What's going on? Where is everybody? (The entire street is deserted) : - Are they out celebrating? ADAM: - They're home. : They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. : I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. BARRY: At least we got our honey back. ADAM: Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? : It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. : This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. :
And now... : Now I can't. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to Vanessa) BARRY: I don't understand why they're not happy. : I thought their lives would be better! : They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. VANESSA: You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? BARRY: - What did you want to show me? (Vanessa takes Barry to the rooftop where they first had coffee and points to her store) VANESSA: - This. (Points at her flowers. They are all grey and wilting) BARRY: What happened here? VANESSA: That is not the half of it. (Small flash forward in time and Vanessa and Barry are on the roof of her store and she points to Central Park) (We see that Central Park is no longer green and colorful, rather it is grey, brown, and dead-like. It is very depressing to look at) BARRY: Oh, no. Oh, my. :
They're all wilting. VANESSA: Doesn't look very good, does it? BARRY: No. VANESSA: And whose fault do you think that is? BARRY: You know, I'm gonna guess bees. VANESSA== (Staring at Barry) Bees? BARRY: Specifically, me. : I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. VANESSA: It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. BARRY: That's our whole SAT test right there. VANESSA: Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. : And then, of course... BARRY: The human species? : So if there's no more pollination,
: it could all just go south here, couldn't it? VANESSA: I know this is also partly my fault. BARRY: How about a suicide pact? VANESSA: How do we do it? BARRY: - I'll sting you, you step on me. VANESSA: - That just kills you twice. BARRY: Right, right. VANESSA: Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. (Vanessa leaves) BARRY: (To himself) I had to open my mouth and talk. : Vanessa? : Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? (Vanessa is getting into a taxi) VANESSA: To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. :
They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. : It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. BARRY: Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. VANESSA: I know. Me neither. (The taxi starts to drive away) BARRY: Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. : Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? : Roses! : Vanessa! (Barry flies after the Taxi) VANESSA: Roses?! : Barry? (Barry is flying outside the window of the taxi) BARRY: - Roses are flowers! VANESSA: - Yes, they are. BARRY: Flowers, bees, pollen!
VANESSA: I know. That's why this is the last parade. BARRY: Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? VANESSA: Could you slow down? (The taxi driver screeches to a stop and Barry keeps flying forward) : Barry! (Barry flies back to the window) BARRY: OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. VANESSA: Yes, it kind of is. BARRY: I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you : with the flower shop. I've made it worse. VANESSA: Actually, it's completely closed down. BARRY: I thought maybe you were remodeling. : But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. VANESSA: I don't want to hear it!
BARRY: All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. : I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. : All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. : - Bees. VANESSA: - Park. BARRY: - Pollen! VANESSA: - Flowers. BARRY: - Re-pollination! VANESSA: - Across the nation! : Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. : They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. : Security will be tight. BARRY: I have an idea.
(Flash forward in time. Vanessa is about to board a plane which has all the Roses on board. VANESSA: Vanessa Bloome, FTD. (Holds out badge) : Official floral business. It's real. SECURITY GUARD: Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. =VANESSA== Thank you. It was a gift. (Barry is revealed to be hiding inside the brooch) (Flash back in time and Barry and Vanessa are discussing their plan) BARRY: Once inside, we just pick the right float. VANESSA: How about The Princess and the Pea? : I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! BARRY: Yes, I got it. : - Where should I sit? GUARD: - What are you? BARRY: - I believe I'm the pea. GUARD: - The pea? VANESSA:
It goes under the mattresses. GUARD: - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. VANESSA: You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! : Let's see what this baby'll do. (Vanessa drives the float through traffic) GUARD: Hey, what are you doing?! BARRY== Then all we do is blend in with traffic... : ...without arousing suspicion. : Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are about to get on a plane) SECURITY GUARD: Stop! Security. : - You and your insect pack your float? VANESSA: - Yes. SECURITY GUARD: Has it been in your possession the entire time? VANESSA: - Yes.
SECURITY GUARD: Would you remove your shoes? (To Barry) - Remove your stinger. BARRY: - It's part of me. SECURITY GUARD: I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. (Barry plotting with Vanessa) BARRY: Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are flying on the plane) Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! VANESSA: I think this is gonna work. BARRY: It's got to work. CAPTAIN SCOTT: (On intercom) Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. : We have a bit of bad weather in New York. : It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. VANESSA: Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. BARRY:
I gotta get up there and talk to them. VANESSA== Be careful. (Barry flies right outside the cockpit door) BARRY: Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. (The flight attendant opens the door and walks out and Barry flies into the cockpit unseen) BARRY: Captain, I'm in a real situation. CAPTAIN SCOTT: - What'd you say, Hal? CO-PILOT HAL: - Nothing. (Scott notices Barry and freaks out) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Bee! BARRY: No,no,no, Don't freak out! My entire species... (Captain Scott gets out of his seat and tries to suck Barry into a handheld vacuum) HAL: (To Scott) What are you doing? (Barry lands on Hals hair but Scott sees him. He tries to suck up Barry but instead he sucks up Hals toupee) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Uh-oh. BARRY: - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
HAL: (Hal doesn't know Barry is on his head) - Who's an attorney? CAPTAIN SCOTT: Don't move. (Scott hits Hal in the face with the vacuum in an attempt to hit Barry. Hal is knocked out and he falls on the life raft button which launches an infalatable boat into Scott, who gets knocked out and falls to the floor. They are both uncounscious.) BARRY: (To himself) Oh, Barry. BARRY: (On intercom, with a Southern accent) Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. : Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? (Vanessa looks confused) (Normal accent) ...And please hurry! (Vanessa opens the door and sees the life raft and the uncounscious pilots) VANESSA: What happened here? BARRY: I tried to talk to them, but then there was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. : Now one's bald, one's in a boat, and they're both unconscious! VANESSA: ...Is that another bee joke? BARRY:
REPORTER: (Talking with Bob Bumble) We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls : with absolutely no flight experience. BOB BUMBLE: Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. BUD: I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. : They've done enough damage. REPORTER: But isn't he your only hope? BUD: Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. : Their wings are too small... BARRY: (Through radio) Haven't we heard this a million times? : "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."... BOB BUMBLE: - Get this on the air! BEE: - Got it.
BEE NEWS CREW: - Stand by. BEE NEWS CREW: - We're going live! BARRY: (Through radio on TV) ...The way we work may be a mystery to you. : Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. : But let me tell you about a small job. : If you do it well, it makes a big difference. : More than we realized. To us, to everyone. : That's why I want to get bees back to working together. : That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. : We get behind a fellow. : - Black and yellow! BEES: - Hello! (The scene switches and Barry is teaching Vanessa how to fly) BARRY:
Left, right, down, hover. VANESSA: - Hover? BARRY: - Forget hover. VANESSA: This isn't so hard. (Pretending to honk the horn) Beep-beep! Beep-beep! (A Lightning bolt hits the plane and autopilot turns off) Barry, what happened?! BARRY: Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. VANESSA: - That may have been helping me. BARRY: - And now we're not! VANESSA: So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. (The plane plummets but we see Lou Lu Duva and the Pollen Jocks, along with multiple other bees flying towards the plane) Lou Lu DUva: All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! : Move out! (The scene switches back to Vanessa and Barry in the plane) BARRY: Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! (Barry sticks out his arms like an airplane and flys in front of Vanessa's face)
VANESSA: Don't have to yell. BARRY: I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. VANESSA: It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! BARRY: It's not a tone. I'm panicking! VANESSA: I can't do this! (Barry slaps Vanessa) BARRY: Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! VANESSA: (Slaps Barry) You snap out of it. BARRY: (Slaps Vanessa) : You snap out of it. VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! (We see that all the Pollen Jocks are flying under the plane) VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it!
VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! VANESSA: - Hold it! BARRY: - Why? Come on, it's my turn. VANESSA: How is the plane flying? (The plane is now safely flying) VANESSA: I don't know. (Barry's antennae rings like a phone. Barry picks up) BARRY: Hello? LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? (All of the Pollen Jocks are carrying the plane) BARRY: The Pollen Jocks! : They do get behind a fellow. LOU LU DUVA: - Black and yellow. POLLEN JOCKS: - Hello. LOU LU DUVA: All right, let's drop this tin can
on the blacktop. BARRY: Where? I can't see anything. Can you? VANESSA: No, nothing. It's all cloudy. : Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. BARRY: - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. (On the runway there are millions of bees laying on their backs) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. VANESSA: - What? BARRY: - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. : Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. : Bring the nose down. BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! CONTROL TOWER OPERATOR: - What in the world is on the tarmac? BUD: - Get some lights on that!
(It is revealed that all the bees are organized into a giant pulsating flower formation) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: - Vanessa, aim for the flower. VANESSA: - OK. BARRY: Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? LOU LU DUVA: Affirmative! BARRY: Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. : Land on that flower! : Ready? Full reverse! : Spin it around! (The plane's nose is pointed at a flower painted on a nearby plane) - Not that flower! The other one! VANESSA: - Which one? BARRY: - That flower. (The plane is now pointed at a fat guy in a flowered shirt. He freaks out and tries to take a picture of the plane) VANESSA: - I'm aiming at the flower!
BARRY: That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! (The plane hovers over the bee-flower) : Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. : Rotate around it. VANESSA: - This is insane, Barry! BARRY: - This's the only way I know how to fly. BUD: Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? (The plane is unrealistically hovering and spinning over the bee-flower) BARRY: Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! : Just drop it. Be a part of it. : Aim for the center! : Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! : Come on, already. (The bees scatter and the plane safely lands) VANESSA: Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!
BARRY: - Yes! (Vanessa is about to high-five Barry) No high-five! VANESSA: - Right. ADAM: Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? BARRY: What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! ADAM: - Thank you. BARRY: - But we're not done yet. : Listen, everyone! : This runway is covered with the last pollen : from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. : That means this is our last chance. : We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. : If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?
: Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? BEES: We're bees! BEE WHO LIKES KEYCHAINS: Keychain! BARRY: Then follow me! Except Keychain. POLLEN JOCK #1: Hold on, Barry. Here. : You've earned this. BARRY: Yeah! : I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. (The Pollen Jocks throw Barry a nectar-collecting gun. Barry catches it) Oh, yeah. JANET: That's our Barry. (Barry and the Pollen Jocks get pollen from the flowers on the plane) (Flash forward in time and the Pollen Jocks are flying over NYC) : (Barry pollinates the flowers in Vanessa's shop and then heads to Central Park) BOY IN PARK: Mom! The bees are back! ADAM: (Putting on his Krelman hat) If anybody needs
to make a call, now's the time. : I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! (The bee honey factories are back up and running) (Meanwhile at Vanessa's shop) VANESSA: (To customer) Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? : Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. (There is a room in the shop where Barry does legal work for other animals. He is currently talking with a Cow) COW: Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! : Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! BARRY: I had no idea. VANESSA: Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? BARRY: Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. MOOSEBLOOD: Sorry I'm late. COW: He's a lawyer too?
MOOSEBLOOD: Ma'am, I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. VANESSA: Have a great afternoon! : Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. BARRY: No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. VANESSA: You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? BARRY: All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. VANESSA: Thank you, Barry! (Ken walks by on the sidewalk and sees the "bee-approved honey" in Vanessa's shop) KEN: That bee is living my life!! ANDY: Let it go, Kenny. KEN: - When will this nightmare end?! ANDY: - Let it all go. BARRY: - Beautiful day to fly. POLLEN JOCK:
submitted by sandwich_with_a_hat to bees [link] [comments]
(Through phone) - Barry? BARRY: - Adam? ADAM: - Can you believe this is happening? BARRY: - I can't. I'll pick you up. (Barry flies down the stairs) : MARTIN BENSON: Looking sharp. JANET: Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. BARRY: Sorry. I'm excited. MARTIN: Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. : A perfect report card, all B's. JANET: Very proud. (Rubs Barry's hair) BARRY= Ma! I got a thing going here. JANET: - You got lint on your fuzz. BARRY: - Ow! That's me!
JANET: - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! (Barry flies out the door) JANET: Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! (Barry drives through the hive,and is waved at by Adam who is reading a newspaper) BARRY== - Hey, Adam. ADAM: - Hey, Barry. (Adam gets in Barry's car) : - Is that fuzz gel? BARRY: - A little. Special day, graduation. ADAM: Never thought I'd make it. (Barry pulls away from the house and continues driving) BARRY: Three days grade school, three days high school... ADAM: Those were awkward. BARRY: Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. ADAM== You did come back different. (Barry and Adam pass by Artie, who is jogging) ARTIE: - Hi, Barry!
BARRY: - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. ADAM: - Hear about Frankie? BARRY: - Yeah. ADAM== - You going to the funeral? BARRY: - No, I'm not going to his funeral. : Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. : Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. ADAM: I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. (The car does a barrel roll on the loop-shaped bridge and lands on the highway) : I love this incorporating an amusement park into our regular day. BARRY: I guess that's why they say we don't need vacations. (Barry parallel parks the car and together they fly over the graduating students) Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. (Barry and Adam sit down and put on their hats) : - Well, Adam, today we are men.
ADAM: - We are! BARRY= - Bee-men. =ADAM= - Amen! BARRY AND ADAM: Hallelujah! (Barry and Adam both have a happy spasm) ANNOUNCER: Students, faculty, distinguished bees, : please welcome Dean Buzzwell. DEAN BUZZWELL: Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... : ...9: : That concludes our ceremonies. : And begins your career at Honex Industries! ADAM: Will we pick our job today? (Adam and Barry get into a tour bus) BARRY= I heard it's just orientation. (Tour buses rise out of the ground and the students are automatically loaded into the buses) TOUR GUIDE: Heads up! Here we go.
ANNOUNCER: Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. BARRY: - Wonder what it'll be like? ADAM: - A little scary. TOUR GUIDE== Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco : and a part of the Hexagon Group. Barry: This is it! BARRY AND ADAM: Wow. BARRY: Wow. (The bus drives down a road an on either side are the Bee's massive complicated Honey-making machines) TOUR GUIDE: We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life : to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. : Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. : Our top-secret formula : is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured : into this soothing sweet syrup : with its distinctive golden glow you know as... EVERYONE ON BUS: Honey! (The guide has been collecting honey into a bottle and she throws it into the crowd on the bus and it is caught by a girl in the back) ADAM: - That girl was hot. BARRY: - She's my cousin! ADAM== - She is? BARRY: - Yes, we're all cousins. ADAM: - Right. You're right. TOUR GUIDE: - At Honex, we constantly strive : to improve every aspect of bee existence. : These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. (The bus passes by a Bee wearing a helmet who is being smashed into the ground with fly-swatters, newspapers and boots. He lifts a thumbs up but you can hear him groan) : ADAM==
- What do you think he makes? BARRY:
- Not enough. TOUR GUIDE: Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. (They pass by a turning wheel with Bees standing on pegs, who are each wearing a finger-shaped hat) Barry:
- Wow, What does that do? TOUR GUIDE:
- Catches that little strand of honey : that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. ADAM: (Intrigued) Can anyone work on the Krelman? TOUR GUIDE: Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. : But choose carefully : because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. (Everyone claps except for Barry) BARRY: The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. ADAM:
BARRY: You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? ADAM: Like what? Give me one example. (Barry and Adam stop walking and it is revealed to the audience that hundreds of cars are speeding by and narrowly missing them in perfect unison) BARRY: I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. ANNOUNCER: Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. BARRY: Wait a second. Check it out. (The Pollen jocks fly in, circle around and landing in line) : - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! ADAM: - Wow. : I've never seen them this close. BARRY: They know what it's like outside the hive. ADAM: Yeah, but some don't come back. GIRL BEES: - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! (The Pollen Jocks hook up their backpacks to machines that pump the nectar to trucks, which drive away)
LOU LO DUVA: You guys did great! : You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! (Punching the Pollen Jocks in joy) I love it! ADAM: - I wonder where they were. BARRY: - I don't know. : Their day's not planned. : Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. : You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. ADAM== Right. (Barry and Adam are covered in some pollen that floated off of the Pollen Jocks) BARRY: Look at that. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. ADAM: It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. BARRY: Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. (Barry waves at 2 girls standing a little away from them)
ADAM== Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? BARRY: Distant. Distant. POLLEN JOCK #1: Look at these two. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Couple of Hive Harrys. POLLEN JOCK #1: - Let's have fun with them. GIRL BEE #1: It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. BARRY: Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! : He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! (Slaps Adam with his hand to represent his scenario) GIRL BEE #2: - Oh, my! BARRY: - I never thought I'd knock him out. GIRL BEE #1: (Looking at Adam) What were you doing during this? ADAM: Obviously I was trying to alert the authorities. BARRY: I can autograph that.
(The pollen jocks walk up to Barry and Adam, they pretend that Barry and Adam really are pollen jocks.) POLLEN JOCK #1: A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? BARRY: Yeah. Gusty. POLLEN JOCK #1: We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. BARRY: - Six miles, huh? ADAM: - Barry! POLLEN JOCK #2: A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. BARRY: - Maybe I am. ADAM: - You are not! POLLEN JOCK #1: We're going 0900 at J-Gate. : What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? BARRY: I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. (The scene cuts to Barry looking out on the hive-city from his balcony at night) MARTIN:
Hey, Honex! BARRY: Dad, you surprised me. MARTIN: You decide what you're interested in? BARRY: - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. : Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? MARTIN: Son, let me tell you about stirring. : You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. : You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. BARRY: You know, Dad, the more I think about it, : maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. MARTIN: You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? : That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. :
Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! JANET: - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. BARRY: - I'm not trying to be funny. MARTIN: You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! JANET: - You're gonna be a stirrer? BARRY: - No one's listening to me! MARTIN: Wait till you see the sticks I have. BARRY: I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! (Barry's parents don't listen to him and continue to ramble on) MARTIN: Let's open some honey and celebrate! BARRY: Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. : Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! JANET: I'm so proud. (The scene cuts to Barry and Adam waiting in line to get a job) ADAM: - We're starting work today!
BARRY: - Today's the day. ADAM: Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. BARRY: Yeah, right. JOB LISTER: Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Is it still available? JOB LISTER: - Hang on. Two left! : One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. ADAM: - What'd you get? BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Picking crud out. Stellar! (He walks away) ADAM: Wow! JOB LISTER: Couple of newbies? ADAM: Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! JOB LISTER: Make your choice. (Adam and Barry look up at the job board. There are hundreds of constantly changing panels that contain available or unavailable jobs. It looks very confusing)
ADAM: - You want to go first? BARRY: - No, you go. ADAM: Oh, my. What's available? JOB LISTER: Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. ADAM: - Any chance of getting the Krelman? JOB LISTER: - Sure, you're on. (Puts the Krelman finger-hat on Adam's head) (Suddenly the sign for Krelman closes out) : I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. (Takes Adam's hat off) Wax monkey's always open. ADAM: The Krelman opened up again. : What happened? JOB LISTER: A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. : Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. : Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!
ADAM: Oh, this is so hard! (Barry remembers what the Pollen Jock offered him and he flies off) Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, : humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, : mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? (Adam turns around and sees Barry flying away) : Barry! POLLEN JOCK: All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... ADAM: (Through phone) What happened to you? Where are you? BARRY: - I'm going out. ADAM: - Out? Out where? BARRY: - Out there. ADAM: - Oh, no! BARRY: I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. ADAM:
You're gonna die! You're crazy! (Barry hangs up) Hello? POLLEN JOCK #2: Another call coming in. : If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd : that gets their roses today. BARRY: Hey, guys. POLLEN JOCK #1 == - Look at that. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? LOU LO DUVA: Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. POLLEN JOCK #1: It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. (Puts hand on Barry's shoulder) LOU LO DUVA: (To Barry) Really? Feeling lucky, are you? BEE WITH CLIPBOARD: (To Barry) Sign here, here. Just initial that. : - Thank you. LOU LO DUVA: - OK. : You got a rain advisory today, :
and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. : So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, : hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. : Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. : Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! BARRY: - That's awful. LOU LO DUVA: (Still talking through megaphone) - And a reminder for you rookies, : bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! : All right, launch positions! POLLEN JOCKS: (The Pollen Jocks run into formation) : Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! LOU LU DUVA: Black and yellow! POLLEN JOCKS:
Hello! POLLEN JOCK #1: (To Barry)You ready for this, hot shot? BARRY: Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. POLLEN JOCK's: Wind, check. : - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. : - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. BARRY: Scared out of my shorts, check. LOU LO DUVA: OK, ladies, : let's move it out! : Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! : All of you, drain those flowers! (The pollen jocks fly out of the hive) BARRY: Wow! I'm out! : I can't believe I'm out! : So blue.
: I feel so fast and free! : Box kite! (Barry flies through the kite) : Wow! : Flowers! (A pollen jock puts on some high tech goggles that shows flowers similar to heat sink goggles.) POLLEN JOCK: This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. : Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. : Roses! POLLEN JOCK #1: 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. : Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. (The pollen jock fires a high-tech gun at the flower, shooting tubes that suck up the nectar from the flower and collects it into a pouch on the gun) BARRY: That is one nectar collector! POLLEN JOCK #1== - Ever see pollination up close? BARRY: - No, sir. POLLEN JOCK #1:
(Barry and the Pollen jock fly over the field, the pollen jock sprinkles pollen as he goes) : I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, : a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. BARRY: That's amazing. Why do we do that? POLLEN JOCK #1: That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. BARRY: Cool. POLLEN JOCK #1: I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. could be daisies. Don't we need those? POLLEN JOCK #2: Copy that visual. : Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. POLLEN JOCK #1: Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? POLLEN JOCK #2: Affirmative. (The Pollen jocks land near the "flowers" which, to the audience are obviously just tennis balls) KEN: (In the distance) That was on the line!
POLLEN JOCK #1: This is the coolest. What is it? POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't know, but I'm loving this color. : It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. POLLEN JOCK #1: Yeah, fuzzy. (Sticks his hand on the ball but it gets stuck) POLLEN JOCK #3== Chemical-y. (The pollen jock finally gets his hand free from the tennis ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. (The pollen jocks turn around and see Barry lying his entire body on top of one of the tennis balls) POLLEN JOCK #2: My sweet lord of bees! POLLEN JOCK #3: Candy-brain, get off there! POLLEN JOCK #1: (Pointing upwards) Problem! (A human hand reaches down and grabs the tennis ball that Barry is stuck to) BARRY: - Guys! POLLEN JOCK #2: - This could be bad. POLLEN JOCK #3: Affirmative. (Vanessa Bloome starts bouncing the tennis ball, not knowing Barry is stick to it)
BARRY== Very close. : Gonna hurt. : Mama's little boy. (Barry is being hit back and forth by two humans playing tennis. He is still stuck to the ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: You are way out of position, rookie! KEN: Coming in at you like a MISSILE! (Barry flies past the pollen jocks, still stuck to the ball) BARRY: (In slow motion) Help me! POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't think these are flowers. POLLEN JOCK #3: - Should we tell him? POLLEN JOCK #1: - I think he knows. BARRY: What is this?! KEN: Match point! : You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to EAT IT! (A pollen jock coughs which confused Ken and he hits the ball the wrong way with Barry stuck to it and it goes flying into the city) BARRY:
Yowser! (Barry bounces around town and gets stuck in the engine of a car. He flies into the air conditioner and sees a bug that was frozen in there) BARRY: Ew, gross. (The man driving the car turns on the air conditioner which blows Barry into the car) GIRL IN CAR: There's a bee in the car! : - Do something! DAD DRIVING CAR: - I'm driving! BABY GIRL: (Waving at Barry) - Hi, bee. (Barry smiles and waves at the baby girl) GUY IN BACK OF CAR: - He's back here! : He's going to sting me! GIRL IN CAR: Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! (Barry freezes as well, hovering in the middle of the car) : GRANDMA IN CAR== He blinked! (The grandma whips out some bee-spray and sprays everywhere in the car, climbing into the front seat, still trying to spray Barry) GIRL IN CAR: Spray him, Granny! DAD DRIVING THE CAR: What are you doing?! (Barry escapes the car through the air conditioner and is flying high above
the ground, safe.) BARRY: Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. (Barry sees that storm clouds are gathering and he can see rain clouds moving into this direction) : I gotta get home. : Can't fly in rain. : Can't fly in rain. (A rain drop hits Barry and one of his wings is damaged) : Can't fly in rain. (A second rain drop hits Barry again and he spirals downwards) Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! (WW2 plane sound effects are played as he plummets, and he crash-lands on a plant inside an apartment near the window) VANESSA BLOOME: Ken, could you close the window please? KEN== Hey, check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. : You see? (Folds brochure resume out) Folds out. (Ken closes the window, trapping Barry inside) BARRY: Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. (Barry tries to fly away but smashes into the window and falls again) : What was that?
(Barry keeps trying to fly out the window but he keeps being knocked back because the window is closed) Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... : Drapes! (Barry taps the glass. He doesn't understand what it is) That is diabolical. KEN: It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. ANDY: What's number one? Star Wars? KEN: Nah, I don't go for that... (Ken makes finger guns and makes "pew pew pew" sounds and then stops) : ...kind of stuff. BARRY: No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. KEN: When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. BARRY: (Looking at the light on the ceiling) There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. (Starts flying towards the lightbulb) : I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. (Barry hits the lightbulb and falls into the dip on the table that the humans are sitting at) KEN:
I predicted global warming. : I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. (Andy dips a chip into the bowl and scoops up some dip with Barry on it and is about to put it in his mouth) : Wait! Stop! Bee! (Andy drops the chip with Barry in fear and backs away. All the humans freak out) : Stand back. These are winter boots. (Ken has winter boots on his hands and he is about to smash the bee but Vanessa saves him last second) VANESSA: Wait! : Don't kill him! (Vanessa puts Barry in a glass to protect him) KEN: You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! VANESSA: Why does his life have less value than yours? KEN: Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? VANESSA: I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. (Vanessa picks up Ken's brochure and puts it under the glass so she can carry Barry back to the window. Barry looks at Vanessa in amazement) KEN:
My brochure! VANESSA: There you go, little guy. (Vanessa opens the window and lets Barry out but Barry stays back and is still shocked that a human saved his life) KEN: I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. VANESSA: Put that on your resume brochure. KEN: My whole face could puff up. ANDY: Make it one of your special skills. KEN: Knocking someone out is also a special skill. (Ken walks to the door) Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. : - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? VANESSA: - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. : (Vanessa tries to close door) KEN== - You could put carob chips on there. VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door but Ken opens it again) KEN: - Supposed to be less calories.
VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door) (Fast forward to the next day, Barry is still inside the house. He flies into the kitchen where Vanessa is doing dishes) BARRY== (Talking to himself) I gotta say something. : She saved my life. I gotta say something. : All right, here it goes. (Turns back) Nah. : What would I say? : I could really get in trouble. : It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. : I can't believe I'm doing this. : I've got to. (Barry disguises himself as a character on a food can as Vanessa walks by again) : Oh, I can't do it. Come on! : No. Yes. No. : Do it. I can't.
: How should I start it? (Barry strikes a pose and wiggles his eyebrows) "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. (Vanessa is about to walk past Barry) Here she comes! Speak, you fool! : ...Hi! (Vanessa gasps and drops the dishes in fright and notices Barry on the counter) : I'm sorry. VANESSA: - You're talking. BARRY: - Yes, I know. VANESSA: (Pointing at Barry) You're talking! BARRY: I'm so sorry. VANESSA: No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. : But I don't recall going to bed. BARRY: Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. VANESSA: This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!
BARRY: I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, (Pointing to the living room where Ken tried to kill him last night) but they were all trying to kill me. : And if it wasn't for you... : I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. (Vanessa stabs her hand with a fork to test whether she's dreaming or not) : That was a little weird. VANESSA: - I'm talking with a bee. BARRY: - Yeah. VANESSA: I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! BARRY: I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. (Barry turns to leave) VANESSA: - Wait! How did you learn to do that? BARRY: (Flying back) - What? VANESSA: The talking...thing. BARRY:
Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. VANESSA: - That's very funny. BARRY: - Yeah. : Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. : Anyway... VANESSA: Can I... : ...get you something? BARRY: - Like what? VANESSA: I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? BARRY: I don't want to put you out. VANESSA: It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. : - It's just coffee. BARRY: - I hate to impose. (Vanessa starts making coffee) VANESSA: - Don't be ridiculous!
BARRY: - Actually, I would love a cup. VANESSA: Hey, you want rum cake? BARRY: - I shouldn't. VANESSA: - Have some. BARRY: - No, I can't. VANESSA: - Come on! BARRY: I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. VANESSA: - Where? BARRY: - These stripes don't help. VANESSA: You look great! BARRY: I don't know if you know anything about fashion. : Are you all right? VANESSA: (Pouring coffee on the floor and missing the cup completely) No. (Flash forward in time. Barry and Vanessa are sitting together at a table on top of the apartment building drinking coffee)
: BARRY== He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. : He finally gets there. : He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. : And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. : Why would I marry a watermelon?" (Barry laughs but Vanessa looks confused) VANESSA: Is that a bee joke? BARRY: That's the kind of stuff we do. VANESSA: Yeah, different. : So, what are you gonna do, Barry? (Barry stands on top of a sugar cube floating in his coffee and paddles it around with a straw like it's a gondola) BARRY: About work? I don't know. : I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. VANESSA: I know how you feel.
BARRY: - You do? VANESSA: - Sure. : My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. BARRY: - Really? VANESSA: - My only interest is flowers. BARRY: Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. : Anyway, if you look... (Barry points to a tree in the middle of Central Park) : There's my hive right there. See it? VANESSA: You're in Sheep Meadow! BARRY: Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! VANESSA: No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. BARRY: - Why do girls put rings on their toes? VANESSA: - Why not? BARRY:
- It's like putting a hat on your knee. VANESSA:
- Maybe I'll try that. (A custodian installing a lightbulb looks over at them but to his perspective it looks like Vanessa is talking to a cup of coffee on the table) CUSTODIAN:
- You all right, ma'am? VANESSA:
- Oh, yeah. Fine. : Just having two cups of coffee! BARRY: Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. VANESSA== Yeah, it's no trouble. BARRY: Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. (Barry points towards the rum cake) : Can I take a piece of this with me? VANESSA: Sure! Here, have a crumb. (Vanessa hands Barry a crumb but it is still pretty big for Barry) BARRY:
- Thanks! VANESSA:
- Yeah. BARRY: All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around.
: Or not. VANESSA: OK, Barry... BARRY: And thank you so much again... for before. VANESSA: Oh, that? That was nothing. BARRY: Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... (Vanessa and Barry hold hands, but Vanessa has to hold out a finger because her hands is to big and Barry holds that) (The custodian looks over again and it appears Vanessa is laughing at her coffee again. The lightbulb that he was screwing in sparks and he falls off the ladder) (Fast forward in time and we see two Bee Scientists testing out a parachute in a Honex wind tunnel) BEE SCIENTIST #1: This can't possibly work. BEE SCIENTIST #2: He's all set to go. We may as well try it. : OK, Dave, pull the chute. (Dave pulls the chute and the wind slams him against the wall and he falls on his face.The camera pans over and we see Barry and Adam walking together) ADAM: - Sounds amazing. BARRY:
- It was amazing! : It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life.
ADAM: You did? Was she Bee-ish? : - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! BARRY: - No, no, no, not a wasp. ADAM: - Spider? BARRY: - I'm not attracted to spiders. : I know, for everyone else, it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. : I can't get by that face. ADAM: So who is she? BARRY: She's... human. ADAM: No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. BARRY: - Her name's Vanessa. (Adam puts his head in his hands) ADAM: - Oh, boy. BARRY== She's so nice. And she's a florist! ADAM: Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!
BARRY: We're not dating. ADAM: You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes : with power washers and M-80s! That's one-eighth a stick of dynamite! BARRY: She saved my life! And she understands me. ADAM: This is over! BARRY: Eat this. (Barry gives Adam a piece of the crumb that he got from Vanessa. Adam eats it) ADAM: (Adam's tone changes) This is not over! What was that? BARRY: - They call it a crumb. ADAM: - It was so stingin' stripey! BARRY: And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! : - You know what a Cinnabon is? ADAM: - No. (Adam opens a door behind him and he pulls Barry in)
BARRY: It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. ADAM: Be quiet! BARRY: They heat it up... ADAM: Sit down! (Adam forces Barry to sit down) BARRY: (Still rambling about Cinnabons) ...really hot! (Adam grabs Barry by the shoulders) ADAM: - Listen to me! : We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! BARRY== Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? ADAM: There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! : You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! BARRY: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEE: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEES AND ADAM: Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! (Flash forward in time; Barry is laying on a raft in a pool full of honey. He is wearing sunglasses) JANET: There he is. He's in the pool. MARTIN: You know what your problem is, Barry? (Barry pulls down his sunglasses and he looks annoyed) BARRY: (Sarcastic) I gotta start thinking bee? JANET: How much longer will this go on? MARTIN: It's been three days! Why aren't you working? (Puts sunglasses back on) BARRY: I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. MARTIN: What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! JANET: Would it kill you to make a little honey? (Barry rolls off the raft and sinks into the honey pool) : Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. : Martin, would you talk to him? MARTIN:
Barry, I'm talking to you! (Barry keeps sinking into the honey until he is suddenly in Central Park having a picnic with Vanessa) (Barry has a cup of honey and he clinks his glass with Vanessas. Suddenly a mosquito lands on Vanessa and she slaps it, killing it. They both gasp but then burst out laughing) VANESSA: You coming? (The camera pans over and Vanessa is climbing into a small yellow airplane) BARRY: Got everything? VANESSA: All set! BARRY: Go ahead. I'll catch up. (Vanessa lifts off and flies ahead) VANESSA: Don't be too long. (Barry catches up with Vanessa and he sticks out his arms like ana irplane. He rolls from side to side, and Vanessa copies him with the airplane) VANESSA: Watch this! (Barry stays back and watches as Vanessa draws a heart in the air using pink smoke from the plane, but on the last loop-the-loop she suddenly crashes into a mountain and the plane explodes. The destroyed plane falls into some rocks and explodes a second time) BARRY: Vanessa! (As Barry is yelling his mouth fills with honey and he wakes up, discovering that he was just day dreaming. He slowly sinks back into the honey pool) MARTIN: - We're still here.
JANET: - I told you not to yell at him. : He doesn't respond to yelling! MARTIN: - Then why yell at me? JANET: - Because you don't listen! MARTIN: I'm not listening to this. BARRY: Sorry, I've gotta go. MARTIN: - Where are you going? BARRY: - I'm meeting a friend. JANET: A girl? Is this why you can't decide? BARRY: Bye. (Barry flies out the door and Martin shakes his head) : JANET== I just hope she's Bee-ish. (Fast forward in time and Barry is sitting on Vanessa's shoulder and she is closing up her shop) BARRY: They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? VANESSA: To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!
: Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. BARRY: A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? VANESSA: No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? BARRY: It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. VANESSA: Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. BARRY: TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! VANESSA: You don't have that? BARRY: We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. VANESSA: Oh, my. (A human walks by and Barry narrowly avoids him) PASSERBY: Dumb bees! VANESSA: You must want to sting all those jerks. BARRY: We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us. VANESSA: So you have to watch your temper (They walk into a store) BARRY: Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, : write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: : Anger, jealousy, lust. (Suddenly an employee(Hector) hits Barry off of Vanessa's shoulder. Hector thinks he's saving Vanessa) VANESSA: (To Barry) Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? (Barry is getting up off the floor) BARRY: Yeah. VANESSA: (To Hector) - What is wrong with you?! HECTOR: (Confused) - It's a bug. VANESSA: He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! (Vanessa hits Hector across the face with the magazine he had and then hits him in the head. Hector backs away covering his head) Barry: What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? (Vanessa sets Barry back on her shoulder)
VANESSA: Yeah, it was. How did you know? BARRY: It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. VANESSA: You've really got that down to a science. BARRY: - Oh, we have to. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. VANESSA: - I'll bet. (Barry looks to his right and notices there is honey for sale in the aisle) BARRY: What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? (Barry looks at all the brands of honey, shocked) How did this get here? Cute Bee, Golden Blossom, : Ray Liotta Private Select? (Barry puts his hands up and slowly turns around, a look of disgust on his face) VANESSA: - Is he that actor? BARRY: - I never heard of him. : - Why is this here? VANESSA: - For people. We eat it. BARRY:
You don't have enough food of your own?! (Hector looks back and notices that Vanessa is talking to Barry) VANESSA: - Well, yes. BARRY: - How do you get it? VANESSA: - Bees make it. BARRY: - I know who makes it! : And it's hard to make it! : There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! VANESSA: - It's organic. BARRY: - It's our-ganic! VANESSA: It's just honey, Barry. BARRY: Just what?! : Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! : You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! :
And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. : I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! (Flash forward in time; Barry paints his face with black strikes like a soldier and sneaks into the storage section of the store) (Two men, including Hector, are loading boxes into some trucks) : SUPERMARKET EMPLOYEE== Hey, Hector. : - You almost done? HECTOR: - Almost. (Barry takes a step to peak around the corner) (Whispering) He is here. I sense it. : Well, I guess I'll go home now (Hector pretends to walk away by walking in place and speaking loudly) : and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. BARRY: You're busted, box boy! HECTOR: I knew I heard something! So you can talk! BARRY: I can talk. And now you'll start talking! : Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier? HECTOR: I don't understand. I thought we were friends. : The last thing we want to do is upset bees! (Hector takes a thumbtack out of the board behind him and sword-fights Barry. Barry is using his stinger like a sword) : You're too late! It's ours now! BARRY: You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! HECTOR: You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! (Barry hits the thumbtack out of Hectors hand and Hector surrenders) Barry: Where is the honey coming from? : Tell me where! HECTOR: (Pointing to leaving truck) Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! (Barry chases after the truck but it is getting away. He flies onto a bicyclists' backpack and he catches up to the truck) CAR DRIVER: (To bicyclist) Crazy person! (Barry flies off and lands on the windshield of the Honey farms truck. Barry looks around and sees dead bugs splattered everywhere) BARRY: What horrible thing has happened here?
: These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now : they're on the road to nowhere! (Barry hears a sudden whisper) (Barry looks up and sees Mooseblood, a mosquito playing dead) MOOSEBLOOD: Just keep still. BARRY: What? You're not dead? MOOSEBLOOD: Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? BARRY: To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. MOOSEBLOOD: I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! ANOTHER BUG PLAYING DEAD: I'm going to Tacoma. (Barry looks at another bug) BARRY: - And you? MOOSEBLOOD: - He really is dead. BARRY: All right. (Another bug hits the windshield and the drivers notice. They activate the windshield wipers) MOOSEBLOOD== Uh-oh! (The windshield wipers are slowly sliding over the dead bugs and wiping
them off) BARRY: - What is that?! MOOSEBLOOD: - Oh, no! : - A wiper! Triple blade! BARRY: - Triple blade? MOOSEBLOOD: Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! (Mooseblood and Barry grab onto the wiper and they hold on as it wipes the windshield) Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! : How much do you people need to see?! (Bangs on windshield) : Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! RADIO IN TRUCK: From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. MOOSEBLOOD: But don't kill no more bugs! (Mooseblood and Barry are washed off by the wipr fluid) MOOSEBLOOD: - Bee! BARRY: - Moose blood guy!! (Barry starts screaming as he hangs onto the antenna) (Suddenly it is revealed that a water bug is also hanging on the antenna.
There is a pause and then Barry and the water bug both start screaming) TRUCK DRIVER: - You hear something? GUY IN TRUCK: - Like what? TRUCK DRIVER: Like tiny screaming. GUY IN TRUCK: Turn off the radio. (The antenna starts to lower until it gets to low and sinks into the truck. The water bug flies off and Barry is forced to let go and he is blown away. He luckily lands inside a horn on top of the truck where he finds Mooseblood, who was blown into the same place) MOOSEBLOOD: Whassup, bee boy? BARRY: Hey, Blood. (Fast forward in time and we see that Barry is deep in conversation with Mooseblood. They have been sitting in this truck for a while) BARRY: ...Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. MOOSEBLOOD: Wow! BARRY: I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. : I mean, that honey's ours. MOOSEBLOOD: - Bees hang tight. BARRY:
- We're all jammed in. : It's a close community. MOOSEBLOOD: Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. BARRY:
- What if you get in trouble? MOOSEBLOOD:
- You a mosquito, you in trouble. : Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! BARRY: At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. MOOSEBLOOD: Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. : Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. (An ambulance passes by and it has a blood donation sign on it) You got to be kidding me! : Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! (Mooseblood leaves and flies onto the window of the ambulance where there are other mosquito's hanging out) :
- Hey, guys! OTHER MOSQUITO:
- Mooseblood!
BEEKEEPER #2: They make the honey, and we make the money. BARRY: "They make the honey, and we make the money"? (The Beekeeper sprays hundreds of cheap miniature apartments with the smoker. The bees are fainting or passing out) Oh, my! : What's going on? Are you OK? (Barry flies into one of the apartment and helps a Bee couple get off the ground. They are coughing and its hard for them to stand) BEE IN APARTMENT: Yeah. It doesn't last too long. BARRY: Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? BEE IN APPARTMENT: Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. (The apartment room is completely empty except for a photo on the wall of the "queen" who is obviously a man in women's clothes) BARRY: This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! : That's a drag queen! : What is this? (Barry flies out and he discovers that there are hundreds of these structures, each housing thousands of Bees) Oh, no! : There's hundreds of them! (Barry takes out his camera and takes pictures of these Bee work camps. The beekeepers look very evil in these depictions)
Bee honey. : Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! : This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. (Flash forward in time and Barry is showing these pictures to his parents) JANET: Oh, Barry, stop. MARTIN: Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. BARRY: Do these look like rumors? (Holds up the pictures) UNCLE CARL: That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. JANET: How did you get mixed up in this? ADAM: He's been talking to humans. JANET: - What? MARTIN: - Talking to humans?! ADAM: He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! JANET: Make out? Barry!
BARRY: We do not. ADAM: - You wish you could. MARTIN: - Whose side are you on? BARRY: The bees! UNCLE CARL: (He has been sitting in the back of the room this entire time) I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. JANET: Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? BARRY: I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! : Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked : your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. JANET: I remember that. BARRY: What right do they have to our honey? : We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!
ADAM: Even if it's true, what can one bee do? BARRY: Sting them where it really hurts. MARTIN: In the face! The eye! : - That would hurt. BARRY: - No. MARTIN: Up the nose? That's a killer. BARRY: There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. (Flash forward a bit in time and we are watching the Bee News) BEE NEWS NARRATOR: Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. BEE PROTESTOR: No more bee beards! BEE NEWS NARRATOR: With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. : Weather with Storm Stinger. : Sports with Buzz Larvi. : And Jeanette Chung. BOB BUMBLE: - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. JEANETTE CHUNG:
- And I'm Jeanette Chung. BOB BUMBLE: A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, : intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, : packaging it and profiting from it illegally! JEANETTE CHUNG: Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, : we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, : Classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. (The scene changes to an interview on the news with Bee version of Larry King and Barry) BEE LARRY KING: Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. : Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? BARRY: Bees have never been afraid to change the world. : What about Bee Columbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? BEE LARRY KING: Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.
: We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. BARRY: How old are you? BEE LARRY KING: The bee community is supporting you in this case, : which will be the trial of the bee century. BARRY: You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. BEE LARRY KING: It's a common name. Next week... BARRY: He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... BEE LARRY KING: Next week... BARRY: Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. BEE LARRY KING: Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here, live. (Bee Larry King gets annoyed and flies away offscreen) BARRY: Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. (Flash forward in time. We see Vanessa enter and Ken enters behind her. They are arguing)
Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. KEN: But it's our yogurt night! VANESSA: (Holding door open for Ken) Bye-bye. KEN: (Yelling) Why is yogurt night so difficult?! (Ken leaves and Vanessa walks over to Barry. His workplace is a mess) VANESSA: You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! BARRY: Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. ADAM: - Frosting... - How many sugars? ==BARRY== Just one. I try not to use the competition. : So why are you helping me? VANESSA: Bees have good qualities. : And it takes my mind off the shop. : Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. BARRY:
Those are great, if you're three. VANESSA: And artificial flowers. BARRY: - Oh, those just get me psychotic! VANESSA: - Yeah, me too. : BARRY: Bent stingers, pointless pollination. ADAM: Bees must hate those fake things! : Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. : Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. VANESSA: - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. BARRY: - I guess. ADAM: You sure you want to go through with it? BARRY: Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able : to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! (Flash forward in time and we are watching the human news. The camera shows
a crowd outside a courthouse) NEWS REPORTER: It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, : where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, : we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. (We are no longer watching through a news camera) ADAM: What have we gotten into here, Barry? BARRY: It's pretty big, isn't it? ADAM== (Looking at the hundreds of people around the courthouse) I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. BARRY: You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? SECURITY GUARD: Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. (A limousine drives up and a fat man,Layton Montgomery, a honey industry owner gets out and walks past Barry) ADAM: - What's the matter? BARRY: - I don't know, I just got a chill. (Fast forward in time and everyone is in the court) MONTGOMERY: Well, if it isn't the bee team.
(To Honey Industry lawyers) You boys work on this? MAN: All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. JUDGE BUMBLETON: All right. Case number 4475, : Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry : is now in session. : Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? MONTGOMERY: A privilege. JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? (Everyone looks closely, they are waiting to see if a Bee can really talk) (Barry makes several buzzing sounds to sound like a Bee) BARRY: I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. JUDGE BUMBLBETON: Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. MONTGOMERY: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, : my grandmother was a simple woman. :
Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right : to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. : If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, : just think of what would it mean. : I would have to negotiate with the silkworm : for the elastic in my britches! : Talking bee! (Montgomery walks over and looks closely at Barry) : How do we know this isn't some sort of : holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? : They could be using laser beams! : Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, : he could be on steroids! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson?
BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. : I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. : It's important to all bees. We invented it! : We make it. And we protect it with our lives. : Unfortunately, there are some people in this room : who think they can take it from us : 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, : you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have : but everything we are! JANET== (To Martin) I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Call your first witness. BARRY: So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have. KLAUSS VANDERHAYDEN: I suppose so. BARRY: I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! KLAUSS: Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. BARRY: Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. : I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? KLAUSS: (Quietly) - No. BARRY: - I couldn't hear you. KLAUSS: - No. BARRY: - No. : Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, : it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. KLAUSS: They're very lovable creatures.
: Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. BARRY: You mean like this? (The bear from Over The Hedge barges in through the back door and it is roaring and standing on its hind legs. It is thrashing its claws and people are screaming. It is being held back by a guard who has the bear on a chain) : (Pointing to the roaring bear) Bears kill bees! : How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! : Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! JUDGE BUMBLETON: OK, that's enough. Take him away. (The bear stops roaring and thrashing and walks out) BARRY: So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. : - Where have I heard it before? MR. STING: - I was with a band called The Police. BARRY: But you've never been a police officer, have you? STING: No, I haven't. BARRY:
No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example : of bee culture casually stolen by a human : for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. STING: Oh, please. BARRY: Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? : Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. : Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! MONTGOMERY: That's not his real name?! You idiots! BARRY: Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on : your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. RAY LIOTTA: Thank you. Thank you. BARRY: I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome : with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow. RAY LIOTTA: I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? BARRY: Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? : Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't : have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? RAY LIOTTA: Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! BARRY: This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! (Ray Liotta looses it and tries to grab Barry) RAY LIOTTA: Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! JUDGE BUMBLETON: - Order in this court! RAY LIOTTA: - You're all thinking it! (Judge Bumbleton starts banging her gavel) JUDGE BUMBLETON: Order! Order, I say! RAY LIOTTA: - Say it! MAN:
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down! (We see a montage of magazines which feature the court case) (Flash forward in time and Barry is back home with Vanessa) BARRY: I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. VANESSA: I think the jury's on our side. BARRY: Are we doing everything right,you know, legally? VANESSA: I'm a florist. BARRY: Right. Well, here's to a great team. VANESSA: To a great team! (Ken walks in from work. He sees Barry and he looks upset when he sees Barry clinking his glass with Vanessa) KEN: Well, hello. VANESSA:
- Oh, Ken! BARRY:
- Hello! VANESSA: I didn't think you were coming. : No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... (Ken holds up his phone and flips it open. The phone has no charge) ...the battery... VANESSA:
KEN: Do we? BARRY: Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. KEN: (Menacingly) That's just what I was thinking about doing. (Ken reaches for a fork on the table but knocks if on the floor. He goes to pick it up) VANESSA: Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. (Ken quickly rises back up after hearing this but hits his head on the table and yells) BARRY: I'm going to drain the old stinger. KEN: Yeah, you do that. (Barry flies past Ken to get to the bathroom and Ken freaks out, splashing some of the wine he was using to cool his head in his eyes. He yells in anger) (Barry looks at the magazines featuring his victories in court) BARRY: Look at that. (Barry flies into the bathroom) (He puts his hand on his head but this makes hurts him and makes him even madder. He yells again) (Barry is washing his hands in the sink but then Ken walks in) KEN: You know, you know I've just about had it (Closes bathroom door behind him) with your little mind games. (Ken is menacingly rolling up a magazine) BARRY:
(Backing away) - What's that? KEN: - Italian Vogue. BARRY: Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. KEN: It's a lot of ads. BARRY: Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? KEN: That's funny, I just can't seem to recall that! (Ken smashes everything off the sink with the magazine and Barry narrowly escapes) (Ken follows Barry around and tries to hit him with the magazine but he keeps missing) (Ken gets a spray bottle) : I think something stinks in here! BARRY: (Enjoying the spray) I love the smell of flowers. (Ken holds a lighter in front of the spray bottle) KEN: How do you like the smell of flames?! BARRY: Not as much. (Ken fires his make-shift flamethrower but misses Barry, burning the bathroom. He torches the whole room but looses his footing and falls into the bathtub. After getting hit in the head by falling objects 3 times he picks up the shower head, revealing a Water bug hiding under it) WATER BUG: Water bug! Not taking sides!
(Barry gets up out of a pile of bathroom supplies and he is wearing a chapstick hat) BARRY: Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! (Ken switches the shower head to lethal) KEN: I've got issues! (Ken sprays Barry with the shower head and he crash lands into the toilet) (Ken menacingly looks down into the toilet at Barry) Well, well, well, a royal flush! BARRY: - You're bluffing. KEN: - Am I? (flushes toilet) (Barry grabs a chapstick from the toilet seat and uses it to surf in the flushing toilet) BARRY: Surf's up, dude! (Barry flies out of the toilet on the chapstick and sprays Ken's face with the toilet water) : EW,Poo water! BARRY: That bowl is gnarly. KEN: (Aiming a toilet cleaner at Barry) Except for those dirty yellow rings! (Barry cowers and covers his head and Vanessa runs in and takes the toilet cleaner from Ken just before he hits Barry) VANESSA: Kenneth! What are you doing?! KEN== (Leaning towards Barry)
You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! VANESSA: We need to talk! (Vanessa pulls Ken out of the bathroom) : He's just a little bee! : And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! KEN: Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? VANESSA: No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! KEN: Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... : My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! VANESSA: Goodbye, Ken. (Ken huffs and walks out and slams the door. But suddenly he walks back in and stares at Barry) : And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners MADE BY MAN! (Ken leaves again and Vanessa leans in towards Barry) VANESSA: I'm sorry about all that. (Ken walks back in again)
KEN: I know it's got an aftertaste! I LIKE IT! (Ken leaves for the last time) VANESSA: I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. : I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. : Are you OK for the trial? BARRY: I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. (Flash forward in time and Barry, Adam, and Vanessa are back in court) MONTGOMERY-- We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. ADAM: Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... (Barry stares at Adam) ...Yeah. LAWYER: Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. MONTGOMERY: Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around : is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. (To lawyer)
- You got the tweezers? LAWYER:
- Are you allergic? MONTGOMERY: Only to losing, son. Only to losing. : Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. : What exactly is your relationship (Points to Vanessa) : to that woman? BARRY: We're friends. MONTGOMERY:
- Good friends? BARRY:
- Yes. MONTGOMERY: How good? Do you live together? ADAM: Wait a minute... : MONTGOMERY: Are you her little... : ...bedbug? (Adam's stinger starts vibrating. He is agitated) I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand,
: doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? BARRY: - Yeah, but... MONTGOMERY: (Pointing at Janet and Martin)
- So those aren't your real parents! JANET:
- Oh, Barry... BARRY:
- Yes, they are! ADAM: Hold me back! (Vanessa tries to hold Adam back. He wants to sting Montgomery) MONTGOMERY: You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? ADAM: He's denouncing bees! MONTGOMERY: Don't y'all date your cousins? (Montgomery leans over on the jury stand and stares at Adam) VANESSA:
- Objection! (Vanessa raises her hand to object but Adam gets free. He flies straight at Montgomery) =ADAM:
- I'm going to pincushion this guy! BARRY: Adam, don't! It's what he wants! (Adam stings Montgomery in the butt and he starts thrashing around)
: Order, please! (Flash forward in time and we see a human news reporter) NEWS REPORTER: The case of the honeybees versus the human race : took a pointed turn against the bees : yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. (Adam is laying in a hospital bed and Barry flies in to see him) BARRY: - Hey, buddy. ADAM: - Hey. BARRY: - Is there much pain? ADAM: - Yeah. : I... : I blew the whole case, didn't I? BARRY: It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. ADAM: I'd be better off dead. Look at me. (A small plastic sword is replaced as Adam's stinger) They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.
: Look, there's a little celery still on it. (Flicks off the celery and sighs) BARRY: What was it like to sting someone? ADAM: I can't explain it. It was all... : All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! BARRY: ...All right. ADAM: You think it was all a trap? BARRY: Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. : What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. ADAM: What will the humans do to us if they win? BARRY: I don't know. ADAM: I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. BARRY: Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!
ADAM: Oh, my. (Coughs) Could you get a nurse to close that window? BARRY: - Why? ADAM: - The smoke. (We can see that two humans are smoking cigarettes outside) : Bees don't smoke. BARRY: Right. Bees don't smoke. : Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. : That's it! That's our case! ADAM: It is? It's not over? BARRY: Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. : Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. (Flash forward in time and Adam is making a paper boat in the courtroom) ADAM: And assuming you've done step 29 correctly, you're ready for the tub! (We see that the jury have each made their own paper boats after being taught how by Adam. They all look confused) JUDGE BUMBLETON:
Mr. Flayman. ADAM: Yes? Yes, Your Honor! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Where is the rest of your team? ADAM: (Continues stalling) Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. : Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, : and as a result, we don't make very good time. : I actually heard a funny story about... MONTGOMERY: Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs : taken up enough of this court's valuable time? : How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? : They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges : against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. : I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going : to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. ADAM: But you can't! We have a terrific case. MONTGOMERY: Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? : Show me the smoking gun! BARRY: (Barry flies in through the door) Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? : Here is your smoking gun. (Vanessa walks in holding a bee smoker. She sets it down on the Judge's podium) JUDGE BUMBLETON: What is that? BARRY: It's a bee smoker! MONTGOMERY: (Picks up smoker) What, this? This harmless little contraption? : This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. (Montgomery accidentally fires it at the bees in the crowd and they faint
and cough) (Dozens of reporters start taking pictures of the suffering bees) BARRY: Look at what has happened : to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" : Is this what nature intended for us? : To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines : and man-made wooden slat work camps? : Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? (Barry points to the honey industry owners. One of them is an African American so he awkwardly separates himself from the others) LAWYER: - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! ADAM AND VANESSA: Free the bees! Free the bees! BEES IN CROWD: Free the bees! HUMAN JURY: Free the bees! Free the bees! JUDGE BUMBLETON: The court finds in favor of the bees!
BARRY: Vanessa, we won! VANESSA: I knew you could do it! High-five! (Vanessa hits Barry hard because her hand is too big) : Sorry. BARRY: (Overjoyed) I'm OK! You know what this means? : All the honey will finally belong to the bees. : Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. MONTGOMERY: This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. : You'll regret this. (Montgomery leaves and Barry goes outside the courtroom. Several reporters start asking Barry questions) REPORTER 1#: Barry, how much honey is out there? BARRY: All right. One at a time. REPORTER 2#: Barry, who are you wearing? BARRY: My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.
(Barry flies outside with the paparazzi and Adam and Vanessa stay back) ADAM: (To Vanessa) - What if Montgomery's right? Vanessa: - What do you mean? ADAM: We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to a man) BUSINESS MAN: Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? BARRY: First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. (As Barry is talking we see a montage of men putting "closed" tape over the work camps and freeing the bees in the crappy apartments) Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, : every last drop. (Men in suits are pushing all the honey of the aisle and into carts) We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more (We see a statue of a bear-shaped honey container being pulled down by bees) than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. : We're all aware of what they do in the woods. (We see Winnie the Pooh sharing his honey with Piglet in the cross-hairs of a high-tech sniper rifle) BARRY: (Looking through binoculars)
Wait for my signal. : Take him out. (Winnie gets hit by a tranquilizer dart and dramatically falls off the log he was standing on, his tongue hanging out. Piglet looks at Pooh in fear and the Sniper takes the honey.) SNIPER: He'll have nausea for a few hours, then he'll be fine. (Flash forward in time) BARRY: And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... (Mr. Sting is sitting at home until he is taken out of his house by the men in suits) STING: But it's just a prance-about stage name! BARRY: ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products : and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. (An old lady is mixing honey into her tea but suddenly men in suits smash her face down on the table and take the honey) OLD LADY: Can't breathe. (A honey truck pulls up to Barry's hive) WORKER: Bring it in, boys! : Hold it right there! Good. : Tap it.
(Tons of honey is being pumped into the hive's storage) BEE WORKER 1#: (Honey overflows from the cup) Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! : - I think we need to shut down! =BEE WORKER #2= - Shut down? We've never shut down. : Shut down honey production! DEAN BUZZWELL: Stop making honey! (The bees all leave their stations. Two bees run into a room and they put the keys into a machine) Turn your key, sir! (Two worker bees dramatically turn their keys, which opens the button which they press, shutting down the honey-making machines. This is the first time this has ever happened) BEE: ...What do we do now? (Flash forward in time and a Bee is about to jump into a pool full of honey) Cannonball! (The bee gets stuck in the honey and we get a short montage of Bees leaving work) (We see the Pollen Jocks flying but one of them gets a call on his antenna) LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") We're shutting honey production! : Mission abort. POLLEN JOCK #1: Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. (The Pollen Jocks fly back to the hive)
(We get a time lapse of Central Park slowly wilting away as the bees all relax) BARRY: Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. ADAM: Oh, yeah? BARRY: What's going on? Where is everybody? (The entire street is deserted) : - Are they out celebrating? ADAM: - They're home. : They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. : I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. BARRY: At least we got our honey back. ADAM: Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? : It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. : This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. :
And now... : Now I can't. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to Vanessa) BARRY: I don't understand why they're not happy. : I thought their lives would be better! : They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. VANESSA: You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? BARRY: - What did you want to show me? (Vanessa takes Barry to the rooftop where they first had coffee and points to her store) VANESSA: - This. (Points at her flowers. They are all grey and wilting) BARRY: What happened here? VANESSA: That is not the half of it. (Small flash forward in time and Vanessa and Barry are on the roof of her store and she points to Central Park) (We see that Central Park is no longer green and colorful, rather it is grey, brown, and dead-like. It is very depressing to look at) BARRY: Oh, no. Oh, my. :
They're all wilting. VANESSA: Doesn't look very good, does it? BARRY: No. VANESSA: And whose fault do you think that is? BARRY: You know, I'm gonna guess bees. VANESSA== (Staring at Barry) Bees? BARRY: Specifically, me. : I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. VANESSA: It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. BARRY: That's our whole SAT test right there. VANESSA: Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. : And then, of course... BARRY: The human species? : So if there's no more pollination,
: it could all just go south here, couldn't it? VANESSA: I know this is also partly my fault. BARRY: How about a suicide pact? VANESSA: How do we do it? BARRY: - I'll sting you, you step on me. VANESSA: - That just kills you twice. BARRY: Right, right. VANESSA: Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. (Vanessa leaves) BARRY: (To himself) I had to open my mouth and talk. : Vanessa? : Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? (Vanessa is getting into a taxi) VANESSA: To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. :
They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. : It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. BARRY: Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. VANESSA: I know. Me neither. (The taxi starts to drive away) BARRY: Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. : Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? : Roses! : Vanessa! (Barry flies after the Taxi) VANESSA: Roses?! : Barry? (Barry is flying outside the window of the taxi) BARRY: - Roses are flowers! VANESSA: - Yes, they are. BARRY: Flowers, bees, pollen!
VANESSA: I know. That's why this is the last parade. BARRY: Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? VANESSA: Could you slow down? (The taxi driver screeches to a stop and Barry keeps flying forward) : Barry! (Barry flies back to the window) BARRY: OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. VANESSA: Yes, it kind of is. BARRY: I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you : with the flower shop. I've made it worse. VANESSA: Actually, it's completely closed down. BARRY: I thought maybe you were remodeling. : But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. VANESSA: I don't want to hear it!
BARRY: All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. : I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. : All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. : - Bees. VANESSA: - Park. BARRY: - Pollen! VANESSA: - Flowers. BARRY: - Re-pollination! VANESSA: - Across the nation! : Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. : They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. : Security will be tight. BARRY: I have an idea.
(Flash forward in time. Vanessa is about to board a plane which has all the Roses on board. VANESSA: Vanessa Bloome, FTD. (Holds out badge) : Official floral business. It's real. SECURITY GUARD: Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. =VANESSA== Thank you. It was a gift. (Barry is revealed to be hiding inside the brooch) (Flash back in time and Barry and Vanessa are discussing their plan) BARRY: Once inside, we just pick the right float. VANESSA: How about The Princess and the Pea? : I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! BARRY: Yes, I got it. : - Where should I sit? GUARD: - What are you? BARRY: - I believe I'm the pea. GUARD: - The pea? VANESSA:
It goes under the mattresses. GUARD: - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. VANESSA: You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! : Let's see what this baby'll do. (Vanessa drives the float through traffic) GUARD: Hey, what are you doing?! BARRY== Then all we do is blend in with traffic... : ...without arousing suspicion. : Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are about to get on a plane) SECURITY GUARD: Stop! Security. : - You and your insect pack your float? VANESSA: - Yes. SECURITY GUARD: Has it been in your possession the entire time? VANESSA: - Yes.
SECURITY GUARD: Would you remove your shoes? (To Barry) - Remove your stinger. BARRY: - It's part of me. SECURITY GUARD: I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. (Barry plotting with Vanessa) BARRY: Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are flying on the plane) Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! VANESSA: I think this is gonna work. BARRY: It's got to work. CAPTAIN SCOTT: (On intercom) Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. : We have a bit of bad weather in New York. : It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. VANESSA: Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. BARRY:
I gotta get up there and talk to them. VANESSA== Be careful. (Barry flies right outside the cockpit door) BARRY: Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. (The flight attendant opens the door and walks out and Barry flies into the cockpit unseen) BARRY: Captain, I'm in a real situation. CAPTAIN SCOTT: - What'd you say, Hal? CO-PILOT HAL: - Nothing. (Scott notices Barry and freaks out) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Bee! BARRY: No,no,no, Don't freak out! My entire species... (Captain Scott gets out of his seat and tries to suck Barry into a handheld vacuum) HAL: (To Scott) What are you doing? (Barry lands on Hals hair but Scott sees him. He tries to suck up Barry but instead he sucks up Hals toupee) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Uh-oh. BARRY: - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
HAL: (Hal doesn't know Barry is on his head) - Who's an attorney? CAPTAIN SCOTT: Don't move. (Scott hits Hal in the face with the vacuum in an attempt to hit Barry. Hal is knocked out and he falls on the life raft button which launches an infalatable boat into Scott, who gets knocked out and falls to the floor. They are both uncounscious.) BARRY: (To himself) Oh, Barry. BARRY: (On intercom, with a Southern accent) Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. : Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? (Vanessa looks confused) (Normal accent) ...And please hurry! (Vanessa opens the door and sees the life raft and the uncounscious pilots) VANESSA: What happened here? BARRY: I tried to talk to them, but then there was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. : Now one's bald, one's in a boat, and they're both unconscious! VANESSA: ...Is that another bee joke? BARRY:
- No! : No one's flying the plane! BUD DITCHWATER: (Through radio on plane) This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? VANESSA: This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. BUD: Where's the pilot? VANESSA: He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. BUD: Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? BARRY: As a matter of fact, there is. BUD:
- Who's that? BARRY:
- Barry Benson. BUD: From the honey trial?! Oh, great. BARRY: Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. : It's got giant wings, huge engines.
REPORTER: (Talking with Bob Bumble) We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls : with absolutely no flight experience. BOB BUMBLE: Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. BUD: I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. : They've done enough damage. REPORTER: But isn't he your only hope? BUD: Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. : Their wings are too small... BARRY: (Through radio) Haven't we heard this a million times? : "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."... BOB BUMBLE: - Get this on the air! BEE: - Got it.
BEE NEWS CREW: - Stand by. BEE NEWS CREW: - We're going live! BARRY: (Through radio on TV) ...The way we work may be a mystery to you. : Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. : But let me tell you about a small job. : If you do it well, it makes a big difference. : More than we realized. To us, to everyone. : That's why I want to get bees back to working together. : That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. : We get behind a fellow. : - Black and yellow! BEES: - Hello! (The scene switches and Barry is teaching Vanessa how to fly) BARRY:
Left, right, down, hover. VANESSA: - Hover? BARRY: - Forget hover. VANESSA: This isn't so hard. (Pretending to honk the horn) Beep-beep! Beep-beep! (A Lightning bolt hits the plane and autopilot turns off) Barry, what happened?! BARRY: Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. VANESSA: - That may have been helping me. BARRY: - And now we're not! VANESSA: So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. (The plane plummets but we see Lou Lu Duva and the Pollen Jocks, along with multiple other bees flying towards the plane) Lou Lu DUva: All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! : Move out! (The scene switches back to Vanessa and Barry in the plane) BARRY: Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! (Barry sticks out his arms like an airplane and flys in front of Vanessa's face)
VANESSA: Don't have to yell. BARRY: I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. VANESSA: It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! BARRY: It's not a tone. I'm panicking! VANESSA: I can't do this! (Barry slaps Vanessa) BARRY: Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! VANESSA: (Slaps Barry) You snap out of it. BARRY: (Slaps Vanessa) : You snap out of it. VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! (We see that all the Pollen Jocks are flying under the plane) VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it!
VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! VANESSA: - Hold it! BARRY: - Why? Come on, it's my turn. VANESSA: How is the plane flying? (The plane is now safely flying) VANESSA: I don't know. (Barry's antennae rings like a phone. Barry picks up) BARRY: Hello? LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? (All of the Pollen Jocks are carrying the plane) BARRY: The Pollen Jocks! : They do get behind a fellow. LOU LU DUVA: - Black and yellow. POLLEN JOCKS: - Hello. LOU LU DUVA: All right, let's drop this tin can
on the blacktop. BARRY: Where? I can't see anything. Can you? VANESSA: No, nothing. It's all cloudy. : Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. BARRY: - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. (On the runway there are millions of bees laying on their backs) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. VANESSA: - What? BARRY: - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. : Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. : Bring the nose down. BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! CONTROL TOWER OPERATOR: - What in the world is on the tarmac? BUD: - Get some lights on that!
(It is revealed that all the bees are organized into a giant pulsating flower formation) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: - Vanessa, aim for the flower. VANESSA: - OK. BARRY: Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? LOU LU DUVA: Affirmative! BARRY: Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. : Land on that flower! : Ready? Full reverse! : Spin it around! (The plane's nose is pointed at a flower painted on a nearby plane) - Not that flower! The other one! VANESSA: - Which one? BARRY: - That flower. (The plane is now pointed at a fat guy in a flowered shirt. He freaks out and tries to take a picture of the plane) VANESSA: - I'm aiming at the flower!
BARRY: That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! (The plane hovers over the bee-flower) : Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. : Rotate around it. VANESSA: - This is insane, Barry! BARRY: - This's the only way I know how to fly. BUD: Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? (The plane is unrealistically hovering and spinning over the bee-flower) BARRY: Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! : Just drop it. Be a part of it. : Aim for the center! : Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! : Come on, already. (The bees scatter and the plane safely lands) VANESSA: Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!
BARRY: - Yes! (Vanessa is about to high-five Barry) No high-five! VANESSA: - Right. ADAM: Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? BARRY: What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! ADAM: - Thank you. BARRY: - But we're not done yet. : Listen, everyone! : This runway is covered with the last pollen : from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. : That means this is our last chance. : We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. : If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?
: Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? BEES: We're bees! BEE WHO LIKES KEYCHAINS: Keychain! BARRY: Then follow me! Except Keychain. POLLEN JOCK #1: Hold on, Barry. Here. : You've earned this. BARRY: Yeah! : I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. (The Pollen Jocks throw Barry a nectar-collecting gun. Barry catches it) Oh, yeah. JANET: That's our Barry. (Barry and the Pollen Jocks get pollen from the flowers on the plane) (Flash forward in time and the Pollen Jocks are flying over NYC) : (Barry pollinates the flowers in Vanessa's shop and then heads to Central Park) BOY IN PARK: Mom! The bees are back! ADAM: (Putting on his Krelman hat) If anybody needs
to make a call, now's the time. : I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! (The bee honey factories are back up and running) (Meanwhile at Vanessa's shop) VANESSA: (To customer) Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? : Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. (There is a room in the shop where Barry does legal work for other animals. He is currently talking with a Cow) COW: Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! : Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! BARRY: I had no idea. VANESSA: Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? BARRY: Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. MOOSEBLOOD: Sorry I'm late. COW: He's a lawyer too?
MOOSEBLOOD: Ma'am, I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. VANESSA: Have a great afternoon! : Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. BARRY: No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. VANESSA: You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? BARRY: All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. VANESSA: Thank you, Barry! (Ken walks by on the sidewalk and sees the "bee-approved honey" in Vanessa's shop) KEN: That bee is living my life!! ANDY: Let it go, Kenny. KEN: - When will this nightmare end?! ANDY: - Let it all go. BARRY: - Beautiful day to fly. POLLEN JOCK:
- Sure is. BARRY: Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. (Barry recreates the scene near the beginning of the movie where he flies through the box kite. The movie fades to black and the credits being) [--after credits; No scene can be seen but the characters can be heard talking over the credits--] You have got to start thinking bee, my friend! :
- Thinking bee!
- Me? BARRY: (Talking over singer) Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. : I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here? SINGER: Oh, BarryBARRY: I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! SINGER: All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. BARRY: I had virtually no rehearsal for that.
2023.06.09 00:40 DarthTiberiu5 Map for Orange Theory Stadium seating zones?
What are the differences between GA 1, A Reserve, GA 2, B Reserve, C Reserve, and D Reserve at Orange Theory Stadium in Christchurch?
I see a crappy map (link below) which shows me the GA areas, but not the seated areas? https://www.frontiertouring.com/files/Maps/FooFighters_MapChristchurch.png
submitted by DarthTiberiu5 to chch [link] [comments]
I see a crappy map (link below) which shows me the GA areas, but not the seated areas? https://www.frontiertouring.com/files/Maps/FooFighters_MapChristchurch.png