Who got voted off in survivor tonight
Hollywood Undead
2011.08.25 00:23 Llamas-With-TNT Hollywood Undead
This is a sub-reddit dedicated to Hollywood Undead, a rap/rock band hailing from Los Angeles, California.
2020.04.03 21:29 PSSD_Kara therapyabuse
New? Please read our community rules and pinned sticky before joining, posting and commenting. This subreddit has no official position about what each should do with their lives or health decisions in any given regard. A community for survivors of trauma, abuse, neglect and other adversity as a result of a therapist’s words/actions. Therapy abuse survivors are welcomed, critical-of-therapy and anti-therapy content is also welcomed.
2014.08.17 07:59 murd0cniccals Motorcyclists of Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
A subreddit for those who ride, and live in Melbourne.
2023.04.01 00:59 GloryBeing 35 [M4F] Portland, OR / PNW / USA -- A multifaceted man looking for a special woman to love
Hi. You don't know me yet, but I'd like to change that. My name is Tom, what's yours? You may have seen me here before. I am back again, with a couple more years, more facets, a heart with more scars, a few grey hairs, and probably more wrinkles than before.
This is going to be a long one. I know who I am at my core and I largely know who I'm looking for, so I choose to put it all out there to start with. Thank you for taking your time to read about me and what I'm after.
About Me
I'm here looking for something incredibly special and unique. A relationship built on concrete of trust and love is what I long for. A mature love, beyond the habit and comfort of the word. The kind where we truly understand each other. Where we are patient with each other. Where we come from a place of kindness. Where we forgive each other, and push each other towards being better people.
I believe that people should be given the opportunity to reinvent themselves. Every moment is a new beginning, but I especially believe that is the case each new day. In that sense, I let go of the past; I forgive quickly and would like the same energy returned to me. Allow me to constantly reinvent myself, as I will allow for you.
I am not saying this to excuse bad or abusive behaviors. I have never physically harmed a partner, and I would never. Sometimes, I say stupid things, or I get passionate about topics, or I can't provide the right kind of support, or the world becomes so overwhelming I'll get moody -- but I can recognize it after and try and learn from it, and make it right. I would never knowingly harm anyone, but especially not my partner. I would like the same objective of do no harm from you.
Many of us here have fragile and broken hearts, wishing to have a meaningful connection. I understand, hear you, and share in your pain. As much as possible, I would like to help as many as you as I can. I'd like to have rich conversations and make lasting friendships, but I am also only one person with only so much energy to share, and I am looking for a powerful, self-actualized woman. Let us be honest and direct with each other on where we stand.
Love is a powerful word to me. In time when I say it to someone, I mean it. It is iron-clad and battle ready. It has fun in the good times and holds true in the stormy seas. It endures, even when life is a roller-coaster, it allows us to enjoy the ride. As long as we both stand with it, we can overcome anything together.
The world feels very broken right now. I want so badly to help fix it and work towards a better future. I've sterilized myself because I feel it's cruel to bring children into a world heading in the direction ours is. I'd like to spend all my time if possible dedicated to helping change course. Please, I ask that you also have that desire, and that we might support each other in sharing our love to the world.
Professionally, I've worked as a software engineer. I am taking time right now to work on myself, work on projects without a financial incentive, and exist without a schedule, but that could also change at any time. I've been programming since I was a little kid, starting with game dev. It's a passion of mine. Because I have always been skilled with programming, I decided to challenge myself in college and I studied physics.
Speaking of challenging myself, when I was younger I was a bit of a runt. I weighed 115lbs, stood at 5'9\", and had something to prove. So I joined the Marine Corps right out of highschool at 17, and served 4 years honorably with a tour in Iraq. I still have a little bit of trauma from my time there, but I've long developed coping mechanisms and have a healthy relationship with myself. Sometimes, depending on the circumstances, I might get caught up in that again, but it quickly fades and I return to normal.
That experience taught me the truth about this country and many truths about the world. Needless to say I have a healthy skepticism of authority and a rebellious attitude.
Nowadays, I'm still 5'9" but I weigh ~170lbs and have an athletic build. My main hobby (besides coding) is road tripping, hiking, and sometimes taking photos. I will say that I am extremely against social media and the damage it does, but I have an Instagram (that I don't really use anymore) to post my photos, which you are free to check out: @tomfromearth
Speaking of photos, for those of you not on social media at all (good for you!!) here is a
gallery of me and some of the places I've visited recently These days, I am not at a fixed location. I owned a house in Portland years ago and do not have any financial issues (I am extremely independent and do not leach off people; I am financially stable, have a healthy savings, and am very good with money), but I decided I couldn't in good conscious own such a beautiful home while everyone around me is struggling. So I sold my house, gave away most of my stuff, then took to the road. I primarily try to sleep in a hammock as I aim to commune with nature as often as possible and exist in moments. I've seen every state save for Alaska (want to go on a road trip with me to visit Alaska?). I am a traveler at heart, but give me a good reason to stop traveling and I will. Getting me to stop would likely involve time, a lot of trust, a tranquil spot remote from civilization with space for both of us, and experiences showing that we have the same understanding of love.
Alternatively, come with me on the road. Bring your own vehicle or hop in the passenger seat in my Tesla. It is a small space but there's enough room to fit us both. I can cover all expenses so money is not a problem. Only need you to be okay being uncomfortable if you join me -- I drive a lot of hours to get to the next spot, stealth camp, dig holes when bathrooms aren't available and nature calls, and jump in cold water often. I've found lowering the comfort requirements can lead to significantly more freedom -- all with the end of being in settings that enrich us.
I am a bit of an anomaly. I don't really fit labels, and at the same time I can get along with most people from all walks of life. Externally, I may seem rough or without emotion; but feel DEEPLY. That said, I am extremely resilient, highly adaptive, and I recover from misteps fast. I love this planet, all the people, all the animals, and all the plants. I feel most at home and at peace with nature. My brain wiring is unique and most certainly divergent from the norm, so I am also accepting of all manner of deviations from neurotypical.
So there's a (long) introduction to me.
Let's talk about what I'm looking for, beyond our shared understanding of love.
What I'm Looking for in You
I enjoy deep philosophical talks across all fields. Please be passionate about something; or be well read enough to have boundary pushing conversations with me. A sample of topics of great interest to me: Artificial Intelligence, technological revolution, human rights, spiritual liberation, alternative governance models, conservation, interplanetary travel, understanding the nature of reality, discovery of the best pizza.
I am not religious but I believe in the goodness of nature and of our reality. I am open to lessons from nature and have experienced existential and divine moments. I would very much like to dive into soul-work with you; be that sharing nature, long walks, meditation, yoga, ayahuasca, fasting, pleasure, and other good-for-the-soul spiritual endeavors.
You don't need to be financially well off, but I'm very attracted to independence. I will support you but I also want to be supported.
I am looking for someone I can trust entirely, as I know I can be trusted entirely. I want to always be honest with you and do things with a basis of love that elevates your being. I ask for the same from you.
I don't smoke tobacco and I rarely, rarely drink alcohol. I do mushrooms often. Consciousness expansion is my objective so I am open to anything I can learn from. Please be that way also, or at least supportive of me being that way.
I am very open minded and am unphased by things. I don't give dramatic, over exaggerated responses and I am slow to anger. I would very much like you to be the same way. And I'd very much like you to be open -- cranky? Let's talk about it, or let me know you need space. On your period and in pain? Tell me and I will make extra effort to support you; I do not think bodies are gross and am at peace talking about anything, even uncomfortable things.
Please love yourself. I believe loving self is a prerequisite of loving others. Take care of your body and self, whatever your condition is. Always aspire towards being as healthy as circumstances allow you. Diet, fitness, healthy sleep, and healthy habits are important to me; they should be important to you also.
Please understand mental health, and have a healthy tolerance for rare abnormal mental states -- along with alone time to sort things out. I offer the same. I recognize that people have their own universe inside of them, and am patient with abnormal states. We'll sort out strange situations at baseline.
I value alone time a whole lot. I need you to as well. Let's give each other the space needed to recenter ourselves. It takes some trust but it can be so powerful in connecting us in a deeper way, as we move ourselves closer to our true selves. Ideal living circumstance is us have our own homes in a home, spaces that are uniquely ours and a shared space in the middle.
I show my love through acts of service and lots of physical touch. I sort of see myself as touch-sexual -- so please, be able to appreciate being touched, and seeing my way of showing love. I like touch a lot. If we wake up and start our day with touch, and go to bed and end our day with touch, that'd be a dream. Cuddling is my happy place.
I like spontaneity and exploration. Healthy routines are fine, but I also like to be surprised. This applies in all ways, but when it comes to sexuality, I think it is very important. I want to try things and explore, and have a partner that is comfortable enough in herself to allow our evolving together sexually. I am somewhat adventurous but I wouldn't label myself too extreme. Craziest thing I'd want to do is play (privately) in nature. I want to find our rhythm together. I want to take a voyage on your body and get familiar with all of it. I probably said too much publicly already but it is important to be on the same wavelength from the get go. Ultimately, I take my time and put in the necessary energy to make sure you are feeling good; I need the same returned.
Beyond that, I am after a deep intimacy. Being included in each other's lives feels good. I am happy to meet and share friends and family when we are confident with us. I put in the energy to get to know you and the people you value; I need the same returned. Being comfortable being vulnerable together is important to me. Sharing and accepting each other when we aren't at our best is important to me. Even little things, like taking a shower together sometimes (I'll wash your back if you wash mine), or being comfortable with crying (I am an expert at hiding this but film and art will get me).
I will drive 10's of thousands of miles to make things work with my person. This is not hyperbole. I have driven an equivalent of this planet's equatorial circumference before for someone. What I am saying is that I am proven to traverse planets for you. I want someone who is of the same mind.
I have a lot on my mind and so much to accomplish. Let's support each other; emotionally, physically, spiritually. Let's make each other's lives easier, richer, and more meaningful. Let's get raw together and grow and evolve together. My primary expectation of you if you are with me is that we share our love with each other unbounded; that we love and support each other patiently; and through that love, we accelerate our self-development towards a better version of ourselves.
If you resonate with this, please, please, reach out. No matter what doubts you have, we are both so rare; take a chance. Tell me about yourself so that I can know how closely you align with me. Please, share some pictures -- I am only human and do need physical attraction, and luckily that's the easiest one for us to establish. Even if you aren't secure with how you look, I may still have an attraction.
If you aren't much of a writer (I can be, though I've been doing less -- and it's okay if you aren't!), I'd be down to have a conversation on the phone after getting to know you a little bit in chat.
Thank you so much for your time reading, and I look forward to connecting with you.
With Love to all -- including readers who don't reply, readers who do and it doesn't work out, and to a very special you,
Tom
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2023.04.01 00:57 brentsg Port-in promo issues with watches/tablets
Try to keep this short.
I ported 10 devices from Verizon to T-Mobile. One promo was $150 per watch/tablet port-in, capped at two. I brought over 3 tablets and 2 watches.
The watch port process was rough. After porting the phones, I got an immediate text/email that the watches came over. Unfortunately they were non-functional. That kicked off 2 days of troubleshooting with T-Mobile, estimating maybe 5 hours of phone time total. Every rep I spoke to asked for my Verizon account number and port pin number. Eventually they got them working and I was pleased (aside from time invested).
The tablets were much the same, port issues specifically with the eSIMs. The tech support folks finally told me that since my watches would cap my promo, so to go see the retail store for some physical SIM cards. I did this and again I was functional.
Now it's rebate time and they are denying that I ported anything except my 4 phone lines. I've been through multiple departments including the NTC to no avail. It looks like I'm out $300.
I'm having other issues as well, so I may just throw in the towel on the service but at this point I have no plan B.
- Service nearly non-existent at my house so though I can use Wi-Fi calling it's an issue for my home gateway they assured me would work.
- They messed up one of my trade ins so instead of an iPhone 11 Pro @ $1000, they're somehow expecting an "iPad 11 64G from Sprint" (whatever that is)
- I'm at about 6-8 hours of phone time with them so far and I've only been a customer for a week.
The people I've spoken to have been really nice but nobody is stepping up with a solution to my $300 problem, nor my trade-in issue.
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2023.04.01 00:57 Numerous-Tangelo6324 Jedi flip trip report
To start off this was a very wild ride for sure and thank the lord for having my girlfriend with me for it.
Setting: The entire trip took place in my house. Either in my room, the kitchen, or the bathroom. My room was the main trip space filled with colouring books, bubbles, and this pile of like 20 of these super soft blankets from Minky Couture that my girlfriend got me into, they feel like heaven when tripping balls and when sober. Me and my girlfriend got home from college and are on spring break and my parents are on vacation. I love outdoor trips because I live near the mountains in Utah however on this high of a dose I was afraid to get lost. Had a great music playlist full of pink floyd, tame impala, and just a bunch of trippy songs that I know.
Dosage: LSD- 4 tabs at 110ug, Mushrooms- 3.5g Albino Penis Envy, MDMA 240mg total- 170 main dose and 70 redose, we decided to up the molly dose because fuck it we had enough to do so. Before anyone says something about how high the doses are, we have done big trips like these before only without the molly. Also we had some benzos on hand incase it was to intense and we needed to mellow out.
4:00pm- Started by taking the LSD at exactly 4 o’clock so we could track the total time of the trip and know when to take the other substances.
4:10- LSD dissolved and we take some medium sized dabs. For me weed helps everything kick in faster. We also measure out the molly and shrooms
4:30- Effects start taking place and we start to giggle and colors start to become more vibrant. I put my trip playlist on and we vibes out to it.
5:00- Reminder goes off to take shrooms. Effects of the acid are very prominent and we decide to do another good sized dab each. To some this would seem stupid but we never trip without a bit of weed/dabs.
5:30- Shrooms start to kick in. My vision is going crazy, the walls are very wavy almost too wavy. My girlfriends face starts morphing int different things. I grab a soft minky blanket and wrap myself in it as I am getting a rush of euphoria from the acid.
5:45- Reminder to take 170mg of MDMA
6:00-Shit is getting crazy Seeing smiley faces rotating around over my vision and green and purple eyes that are oozing down the walls.
6:30- By this point I can’t really form sentences, I forget what I am saying as I say it.
6:45- Molly starts kicking in just in time for the sunset and it was the most beautiful thing to watch.
7:00- We go back inside the house and both take another huge dab. I then grab my blanket and it feels soooooo soft, the best feeling in the world is a soft minky blanket while tripping. I wrap it around myself and am hit with the most powerful sense of euphoria so much that everything shuts down for a minute and I collapse onto the pile of blankets on the ground. As I am laying there I start getting that twitchy feeling in my abdomen from the euphoria. I shoot out of my body and I now see myself in 3rd person from the ceiling. My girlfriend is on the bed and i’m on the floor. I see her reach out for me and I get shot back to my body and roll over to look at her. We lock eyes and she morphs into an angel. She leans in for a kiss and I pull her off the bed to me. We made out for a bit then had some wild sex. With every pump the visuals changed and the trip got more and more intense. After a few minutes all I could see was a mess of blankets on the floor. Like my girlfriend had disappeared and morphed into the blankets. Then fractals started to form and soon after my entire vision was fractals and I couldn’t see infront on me. I could no longer see my hands if they were infront of my face, everything became visuals. After some time everything went back to a normal trip and we were somehow still having sex. As I orgasm I pull out and shit goes everywhere. We ended up both having an orgasm at the same time.
9:30- I go to the bathroom after the sex and I check my phone and it’s somewhere around 9:30. Still tripping balls I had the hardest time trying to piss. I get back to the room and take a giant dab. Then I grab a blanket, wrap it around myself and fall over on the the blanket pile. My girlfriend comes back from the bathroom and cuddles up right next to me. We spent the next hour or so talking about shit that probably made no sense while still listening to the music I put on at the beginning of the trip.
10:45- I put on the new Avatar because I found a good picture version of it on the amazon fire stick before we started tripping. It was a very pleasant way to watch the movie accept when I couldn’t watch it because I was seeing god like figure covering my vision for half the movie. After we watched the new puss and boots movie. Which also was tough to watch because everything was rapidly moving in the background
3:30- After the movies were done we put on music and tried to go to bed until passed out.
Next morning I woke up and couldn’t remember why we slept on the blanket pile. Then I remembered that we took a trip to another dimension.
Might do another trip like this again because it was so interesting and intense. Definitely would not do it solo though. The serotonin dump is like no other but that’s the price you pay for a night in another dimension.
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2023.04.01 00:56 dragon_morgan I completed a bingo card with all indie/self published titles!
| bingo card in all its glory For Bingo this year I thought it would be fun to complete a card using only self- or indie-published books. By definition of indie published I mostly mean anything that uses KDP or Ingram Spark or similar as their main distributor, but if someone from a very small trad press managed to sneak through my filter consider this covering my bum and saying I picked things that were indie “enough” :) So then, without further ado, the mini reviews! A Book from Fantasy’s Top LGBTQIA List Substitution, but within the spirit of the thing: School Setting (2020) The Enchanter by Tobias Begley Hard Mode: N/A Came up against a challenge on the very first square because the only indie published book on the somewhat limited list was Arcane Ascension, which I’d already read, and didn’t really want to use my one reread on that. So I started looking around for other LGBTQ books to use as my substitution and ended up picking up Enchanter, which turned out to be… a lot like Arcane Ascension, actually. Evander is a socially awkward young gay man who is off to magic school to become an enchanter. What he lacks in raw magical ability he makes up for in determination and cleverness, and he spends much of the book pushing the magic system to its absolute limit, all while meanwhile navigating a budding first romance with the handsome nobleman he met on the train. Meanwhile someone is letting eldritch horrors into the school grounds, and it’s up to Evander and his new boyfriend to figure out the mystery and avoid taking the blame themselves. I enjoyed this book quite a lot, though it leans heavily into a lot of the tropes of both the magic school and progression fantasy genres. I’d say if you enjoyed Arcane Ascension and Mother of Learning, you will probably definitely enjoy this one too. Weird Ecology Iron Truth by S.A. Tholin Hard Mode: yes Over a century ago, Joy Somerset entered cryogenic sleep and boarded a colony ship, expecting to awaken on an idyllic new world. Instead she wakes up on Cato, a dusty hellscape inhabited only by giant spiders, hostile locals, and red lichen that is probably definitely up to no good. Rigid and religiously devout military commander Cassimir from the theocratic Primaterre Protectorate seems like her ticket back to civilization, but neither of them will go anywhere until they can unravel Cato’s mysteries. This book won the first ever SPSFC contest and I can see why, because even though it was a somewhat long book, it kept me turning pages all the way through. Part space opera, part cosmic horror, I felt like I was racing to the end just to figure out what was going on. If I had any complaints it was that the romance felt a little bit forced — here is a hot girl, here is a hot guy, they are designated to end up together because the plot says so. In such a long book there ought to have been plenty of breathing room for their romance to grow organically but I never really felt like I got that, it was just hawtness at first sight and that was that. Still highly recommend to anyone who likes space opera. Two or More Authors NACL: Eye of the Storm by Allegra Pescatore and E. Sands Hard Mode: no Their planet seems like a perfect paradise, with one glaring flaw: the gods, when they created the world, forgot to include salt, an ingredient necessary for human life. In order to hastily cover up their mistake, they concentrated a world’s worth of salt in a giant pillar in the middle of the ocean, intending for it to distribute over time. But humans being humans, they unfortunately invented capitalism first, and now a corrupt corporation rigidly controls the salt pillar. Thanks to a meddlesome precog who might or might not himself be a god, a ragtag crew comes together, formed of an ex corporate slave, a grumpy doctor, a pair of pirates who smuggle salt to those in need, and a woman with dangerous magical powers who’d honestly rather just be left alone. Together, they hatch a plan to take down the corporation once and for all. They have to learn to trust each other first, though, and that is easier said than done. Well all right. If you know me you know I’m a sucker for a story about a ragtag crew that has to come together to defeat the big bad. This was a great story and it really delivered in that respect. My main complaint was that there are a lot of POV characters and many of them sort of blend together in the beginning. They all have their own reasons for being angry at the corporation but when you have multiple characters whose *main* personality trait is “GRR I HATE THE COMPANY” they kind of run together for the first act until they start to distinguish themselves. My nickname for this book while I was reading it was “Salty Bitches” for a reason. For real, though, I really did enjoy this one, and if you want a nice escapist fantasy about sticking it to the corporate man, this is the book for you. Historical SFF Scales and Sensibility by Stephanie Burgis Hard Mode: no, sigh, all I had to do was find something not set in one of two countries, and guess where this one is set When Elinor’s parents died and left her and her sisters penniless, she has no choice but to move in with her obnoxious relatives and, Cinderella-like, work as a servant for her terrible cousin. She plans to abide this with determined British stoicness until she can finally leave and become a governess or something, but if there is one thing she cannot abide, it is dragon abuse. So she finds herself running from home with a stolen dragon and only a few coins to her name, and is nearly run off the road by a handsome gentleman off to court her very same horrible cousin. And that’s when the real shenanigans begin. This book was a delight from start to finish. It is one of the finalists for this year’s SPFBO which I think is incredibly well-deserved. It shares a lot in common with its fellow finalist Miss Percy’s Pocket Guide, making 2022 evidently a big year for downtrodden British ladies hiding dragons from their terrible relatives. I recommend this one to anyone who likes cozy fantasy, regency era, and fantasy of manners. Set in Space The Last Gifts of the Universe by Rory August Hard Mode: I can’t honestly remember if the kids are from Earth or not but I’m going to go with yes, so no on the hard mode When humans finally invented faster-than-light travel, they expected to be welcomed or mistrusted by a greater galactic community. What they found instead were hundreds of abandoned planets, remnants of a civilization wiped clean by some unknown catastrophe. Archaeologists are desperate to find out what went wrong, as are the corrupt corporations who control humanity, because what happened to one civilization could happen to ours, as well. The Last Gifts of the Universe stars Scout, a small-time independent archaeologist, and her younger brother, as they race to find precious recordings of the lost civilization before their corporate rivals can. Despite being set in the backdrop of a mystery that spans centuries and light years and potentially multiple-world-ending stakes, this story is really more about the more immediate human (and sentient-non-human) relationships of the characters. It is a story about Scout’s relationship with their brother, their complicated memories with their parents, and their growing frenemyship with the corporate soldier who wants the same things they do. It is also about Biryeena, the alien politician who lived centuries ago, leaving her recorded memories for future archaeologists to find. I enjoyed this book very much, but I think I might have enjoyed it a lot more if we were not presented with such galaxy-spanning stakes only to be told that those stakes were not the point. They could have just been ordinary space archaeologists without trying to solve Space Plague. I also wasn’t sure how I felt about the ancient alien civilization as it is presented. Making them very human-seeming made them more relatable to the reader, but I found it strained suspension of disbelief, just a little, that they would so closely follow a somewhat idealized version of modern Western civilization, in which the alien narrator goes to a four-year college, struggles to find a job upon graduation, gets married, and eventually runs for office in a vaguely democratic society. Still, I recommend this one to fans of Becky Chambers and anyone who wants a more intimate character-focused space opera. Standalone Battle Mage by Peter Flannery Hard Mode: yes Falco Dante longs to be a dragon rider and fight the demon hordes, but unfortunately, he is shunned by his community for being a sick weakling, and worse yet, being the son of a traitor who turned against the town. But when a dragon summoning goes horribly wrong and the townsfolk are forced to flee, he learns he has the rare potential to become a battle mage, and may be the one to repair the bond between humans and dragons and defeat the demons once and for all. Of course as many of you know I love a good training montage story, as well as “battle school” types of settings. And dragon riders. I love those two. So even going in I knew this book was going to be a good time. It is long, incredibly long, but I actually admire Flannery for keeping the story contained to one book, because it could have easily been a 10 book series full of doorstoppers if he wanted to stretch things out. I did think the pacing dragged a little bit in places, the blow-by-blow battle scenes were too frequent and drawn-out for my personal tastes, and the part where they’re fleeing the town in the beginning seemed to take forever when it really didn’t need to. If you’re a fan of a lot of the classic fantasy tropes, however, this is not one to miss. Anti-Hero Where Blood Runs Gold by A.C. Cross Hard Mode: no Errol Thorpe is your typical old west sheriff who refuses to take shit from anyone. He has his own strong moral compass, but will not hesitate to bust heads at the slightest provocation. This of course becomes both a strength and a complication when he finds himself in custody of a young woman he needs to keep safe, while also unraveling the mystery of the creepy magic dust that’s making people go crazy. This book is incredibly tightly plotted and had me eagerly turning pages all the way through. I think what I liked the most about it was the general voice to the writing, I really felt like I was getting into Sheriff Errol Thorpe’s head. If you’re a fan of gritty types of westerns like HBO’s Deadwood I think you’ll really enjoy Where Blood Runs Gold. Book Club OR Readalong Book The Wolf and the She-Bear by Morgan Stang (RAB December 2022) Hard Mode: yes :) “Retired” mercenary Samantha Redwyne just wants a quiet peaceful life in the middle of nowhere. But when a man from her past begs her help transporting some Probably Definitely Stolen Cargo, she reluctantly agrees. Naturally, trouble follows quickly at their heels. This book was both very fast paced and also novella length so it made for a very quick read. I kind of almost wish it had been a little bit longer, though, because I would have liked to get to know the characters a bit more, given them room to breathe. I feel like we never really get to know who Samantha is as a person, and so when big reveals are made about her past, they don’t quite pack the emotional punch they’re probably meant to. There are also two male POV characters, ostensibly on opposite sides, who badly run together to me as both of their chief personality traits are “murder everyone in sight.” I did enjoy one of the minor POV characters, a would-be housewife who has turned to banditry to support her family, because it was kind of intriguing how much she tells herself she’s better than those OTHER bandits when she really, really isn’t. Ultimately this book was either just a little too short or a little too grimdark for my tastes, but it was intriguing enough I can definitely see myself reading something else of Stang’s along the way. Cool Weapon Year of the Sword books 1-3 by Dakota Krout Hard Mode: yes, the sword’s name is Sarge okay I’m being a LITTLE bit cheaty here because what I actually read for bingo was Dokeshi March, book 3 in the series, but I feel like it makes more sense to do the mini-review of book 1, Lord January, so bear with me. This series. THIS SERIES. I’m not even really sure where to start. Many centuries ago, due to a conflict, the world was split into twelve districts, one for each month of the year. Each district has one defining trait that makes it stand out from the others. In District January, they grow all the food, and everyone is very much into eating as much as possible. The fatter you are, the more status you are perceived to have in January. February is the polar opposite, where everyone drinks wheatgrass smoothies and is obsessed with fitness. In March, everyone is into gambling, and so it goes. Our hero, Grant Leap, is ostracized from his native January District for only being a little bit fat and also being born on leap day which is a big no-no in Calendar Culture. All that changes, however, when he finds a magic talking sword, Sarge, who agrees to train him to become powerful, at a cost. If he doesn’t defeat all the calendar lords by the end of the year, his life is forfeit. If you think this premise sounds ridiculous, well, yes it is. It is 100% exactly as ridiculous as it sounds. And yet I could not for the life of me put it down. What can I say. I love training montages. This is a LitRPG-style progression fantasy with visible stat screens and leveling up, and I think it’s a fun, albeit ludicrous, addition to the genre. Unfortunately the series seems to be on hiatus currently while the author works on other projects, but I’ll definitely be continuing when it picks back up again. Revolutions and Rebellions Blade’s Edge by Virginia McClain Hard Mode: Sort of? The action is more human-focused, but they’d not get far without the rebellion Centuries ago, Fantasy Not Quite Japan was a brutal monarchy, ruled by a violent and corrupt mage queen. After she was defeated, the pendulum swung the other way, and now women and girls are brutally subjugated, especially those who can use magic — when magic-using girls are admitted to exist at all. Mishi and Taka were best friends in their orphanage home, each dreading the day they would be separated to be sold into either servitude or a loveless and abusive marriage. As it happens, they are both taken away on the same day, though to neither of those things. When Taka’s secret magical abilities are revealed, she is shipped off to a brutal school where women with some small magical gift are taught to be healers and midwives, but not without going through a ton of abuse first. Mishi fares better, being adopted into a warrior family who works against the patriarchal government and trains women to fight in secret. Years later, the two friends meet again when Taka flees from her evil magic school and instead joins the rebellion. I quite enjoyed this book, the way the two girls’ stories diverge and then weave back together. The pacing is tight and intriguing and there was never any point where I felt bored, and yet we are also given the space to really get to know and care about the characters. I look forward to reading more from this author. Name in the Title India Bones and the Ship of the Dead by Set Sytes Hard Mode: yes India Bones lives in a quiet portside town dreaming of a life of adventure like his famous pirate father who disappeared many years ago. His opportunity arrives when a ghost ship makes port and the ghosts and skeletons dance on the shore, and India sneaks off to join them. While he quickly finds that a ghost ship is no place for a living boy, this soon opens the door to discoveries about his past and new adventures ahead. This was a fun adventure romp, a bit disjointed as India is yanked from one misadventure to the next, but entertaining all the way through. The only slightly confusing thing about it was I was never quite sure what age group it was meant for. India himself is quite young and for a lot of the book it reads very much like a middle-grade novel, but it also has things like pre-teens getting drunk, presented uncritically. Still this made for a good pirate adventure and I plan to continue this series eventually. Author Uses Initials Heavy by J.J. Thorn Hard Mode: I’m certain I have no idea Everyone in the kingdom dreams of being granted an affinity when they turn 16 and going off to magic school. Terrence realizes that chances are he’ll never get any affinity at all, so he’s surprised and rather alarmed when he’s given a rare and unusual one: the ability to see and manipulate weight. Rarity is all well and good, but will it help him become a dungeon-crawler like he hopes? Heavy is another magic school LitRPG progression fantasy with stats and level-ups. I seemed to be big on those this Bingo. This is another book where I’m not really sure how to write a review for it. It’s definitely rough in places; the author seems to have some interesting ideas about how punctuation works, and the truth is not a whole lot HAPPENS in this book. There are hints of some sinister goings-on in the greater dungeon-delving community, but for the most part Terrence just goes to school, stands up to bullies, makes friends, and tries to figure out how to use his unusual weight powers. But you know what, despite all that, I really enjoyed this book. It was cosy and enjoyable and made me want to go to magic school, and I look forward to reading more in this series. Published in 2022 The Blood of Crows by Alex C. Pierce Hard Mode: yes Ren thought his days of violence and bloodshed were over when someone finally bought out his indentured servitude as a state-sanctioned thief in a brutal army unit. Unfortunately, he was wrong. When one last thieving job goes terribly wrong and his friend and mentor goes missing, Ren finds himself framed for the murders of several prominent noblewomen. Now he has to solve the mystery and clear his name before it’s too late. This was a fun book with a fast-paced plot and a lit of twisty turns that I didn’t see coming, plus a protagonist who has a strong voice and is entertaining to read about. I liked the fact that the main character doesn’t have any magic powers in a world where everyone else does. There are some other series that do that, like Codex Alera, but it’s still rare enough to be refreshing. However it does this one thing that’s fairly common in this particular “snarky guy gets in trouble” subgenre where he simply cannot catch a break, ever, and I have to wonder how he has not collapsed from exhaustion already, not to mention how he manages to survive so many beatings. Still, a fun book and a good debut, highly recommend. Urban Fantasy Oath Broken by Jarryd Smith Hard Mode: Alas, no Once a famed monster hunter, Kaleb just wants to leave that life behind and live a normal life. But when dragged against his will to his friend’s wedding, and discovering there’s definitely something suspicious about the bridal party, he is forcefully dragged back into a life he wanted little to do with. This was an enjoyable, quick read, although I wish there were just a bit more character development as some things feel rushed and I had to scramble to remember who was who. I think this series definitely shows potential, though, and I look forward to seeing where it goes. Set in Africa The Windweaver’s Storm by Antoine Bandele Hard Mode: yes This is the second book in the TJ Young and the Orishas series. The first one, The Gatekeeper’s Staff, takes place in the United States and therefore doesn’t qualify for the Africa bingo square, but this one takes place in Nigeria and therefore does. After getting up to all kinds of heroics at summer camp last year, TJ Young has at last been offered a place at the prestigious Ifa Academy. Unfortunately, he has a lot of challenges ahead of him as his power still behaves erratically, and he made a promise to a god that he might not be able to keep. I really enjoyed this follow-up to the first book, especially the depiction of the magic school. Hogwarts has absolutely nothing on how cool Ifa Academy is. I somehow ended up reading a lot of magic school stories this year and this one was by far my favorite. The main characters’ teenage drama, while exhausting in the way that teenage drama often is, was also nonetheless well-realized and fun to read about. My only slight complaint was that I felt the ending was a little rushed, and I wanted a better explanation of certain occurrences near the end. But if you’re interested in something similar to Harry Potter or Percy Jackson with a majority-POC cast, this is the book for you. Non-Human Protagonist The Skin by J.E. Hannaford Hard Mode: She does spend most of the book in human form so I’d say not really When unscrupulous humans steal her sister’s skin, a young selkie sacrifices her own freedom so that her sister can go free. She is forced to work for the humans she despises, at least until she can win her way to freedom and get her sister’s skin back. This was a really unique book in that it combines ancient Celtic mythology with a post-apocalyptic setting, something I’d never really seen before. Also, it has selkies, who are among some of the coolest mythical creatures. But I like seals so I might be a bit biased. The story starts out with three separate timelines that then join together in the second act, and I thought that part of the storytelling was cleverly done. Selkie’s journey is a powerful one, because she starts out very angry and unwilling to trust anyone but eventually makes deep friendships as the story continues. If I were to have any nitpicks I’d say that things come together almost a little too cleanly at the end, and characters I was certain were sus turn out to be squeaky clean, but that’s hardly a massive flaw. I recommend this one to anyone who likes seals, boats, mythology, shapeshifters, or post-apocalyptic settings. Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey Duckett and Dyer: Dicks for Hire by G.M. Nair Hard Mode: I’m not sure, probably not, there is some time travel Michael Duckett is starting to get annoyed with his best friend and roommate Stephanie Dyer, who refuses to take life seriously. Whether it’s trying to get out of his dead end job or trying to find a girlfriend, it seems like she’s always ruining his plans with her antics. When they start getting contacted about an ad in the paper selling them as a pair of private detectives, he thinks it must be another prank. What he gets instead is a zany jaunt across the multiverse that will strain and perhaps save their friendship. This book was delightful overall, and I enjoyed it from beginning to end. It never at any point takes itself too seriously so if you want a Super Serious Time Travel Book this probably isn’t the one for you. But it nevertheless has a lot of heart and I grew quite attached to both main characters by the end. I did think some of the multiverse destinations were just a little too zany as to strain my willing suspension of disbelief, however, such as the world with the giant hamburger monsters. Still, this book was great fun. Five SFF Short Stories The Alchemy of Sorrow by Various Hard Mode: Yes I find it hard to review short story collections because there are so many of them and each is going to have their own strengths and weaknesses. However this is one of the best short story collections I’ve read in awhile. There was not a single story in it that I found dragged at any point; I enjoyed all of them immensely and found a lot of new authors whose work I will definitely be checking out. The theme of the anthology is dealing with grief so just by definition a lot of these stories will rip your heart out and stomp on it, but there is also an undercurrent of hope throughout. 5/5, highly recommend. Features Mental Health The Heretic’s Guide to Homecoming by Sienna Tristen Hard Mode: Yes This book. OH BOY THIS BOOK. I had actually hoped to read the second book in the duology for this square but I didn’t quite finish in time, but thankfully I reread book 1 to refresh my memory going in, so I’m going to use that as my one allowed reread. Consider this a mini-review for both books, however, with the caveat that I am still working on reading the ending. Ronoah Genoveffa Ellizzi-Denna Pilanovani suffers from a lot of anxiety and self doubt. After failing as both a priest and a scholar, Ronoah finds himself lost in a foreign coffee shop, unsure what to do or how to face the future. Enter Reilin, a mysterious stranger who offers to take him to the beautiful and sacred Pilgrim State — as long as he follows a specific set of rules. Ronoah’s journey takes him half way across the world, where he encounters vibrant cultures, wonderful friends, and mysterious ancient ruins, while almost in passing discovering the lost secrets of the fallen Shalledrim empire. But if you’re looking for action and adventure around every corner, this is probably not the book for you. Ronoah’s journey is internal far more than it is external, all about figuring out who he is and what is important to him and how, at last, to have faith in himself. I fully admit that Ronoah is not the protagonist for everyone, as his internal monologue and negative self talk can be A LOT, especially in the first book. But this series is one of the most beautiful pieces of character work I’ve read in a long time, all told via beautiful, poetic prose that almost seems to sing from the page. I’d say fans of Robin Hobb will also enjoy this series. Self-Published or Indie Publisher Dreams of Dust by Lily Anne Crow Hard Mode: Yes Technically all of these books would count for this square but I will go with this one because as of typing this it only has two Goodreads reviews, one of which is mine, which is a crying shame because this book deserves better, but also means it handily counts for hard mode. Pampered city kid Thaniel Swift has studied long and hard to be a wayfinder, creating maps with his beautiful magic atlas. He’s beyond thrilled to get to go on his first expedition, only to find out he still has a lot to learn when they get sucked into a missing person investigation and find themselves pit against an undead queen who is willing to destroy the world to end her grief. This book has all the things I enjoy most in a fantasy story: secret ancient ruins, a colorful cast of characters who are suspicious of each other at first but eventually come together like family, and scary evil bad guys who commit their atrocities out of misplaced love. The world building is absolutely top notch, with a setting that feels lived in. I really wish more people would read this series so I could gush about it more. Award Finalist, But Not Won Shadow of a Dead God by Patrick Samphire Hard Mode: Yes Shadow of a Dead God was a SPFBO finalist a few years ago. It features Mennik Thorne, a down on his luck mage who gave up a life of privilege to try and make it on his own. This goes about as well as you might expect, when a routine probably-not-legal job for his oldest and best friend blows up in his face and he winds up with half the city out to get him. This book shares a lot of similarities with the Blood of Crows, reviewed above — snarky guy has a routine job go terribly wrong, gets roped into a conspiracy, and survives far more beatings than is healthy. But if I were to assign comp titles to this book I’d say it’s like the Dresden Files meets Locke Lamora. Mennik is a delightful character overall and I enjoyed being in his sarcastic head. BIPOC Author Guns of Penance by Mari Kurisato Hard Mode: Yes, Mari is Nakawē Ojibwe indigenous One of the really nice things about Bingo is that it seems like every year there’s a book I might not have necessarily picked up on my own but end up thoroughly enjoying. This book isn’t in my usual wheelhouse — ultra-violent post-apocalyptic settings are usually too edgy for me — but I’d purchased the book awhile back in order to support the author, and since I had it on my kindle anyway and it qualified for hard mode, I decided to give it a go. Wow! For a book about people murdering each other in a post-nuclear wasteland, this book was actually a ton of fun. There are four main female POV characters, whose stories weave in and out of each other: a computer scientist on the run after a major discovery, her rich heiress ex girlfriend, a drug addicted gangster looking to make a clean start, and a retired mercenary who is getting too old for this nonsense. Since all of these women are in somewhat violent roles I was worried they would start to blur together but each has a very distinct voice and was thoroughly enjoyable to read about. Highly recommended if you’re after a more diverse and female-led version of Mad Max. Shapeshifters Sidetracked by S.K. Kelley Hard mode: yes I received this book as part of an indie author Secret Santa exchange last December. Studious and socially awkward, Jayde wonders how she’s going to survive her first summer vacation in college alone without her more extroverted best friend and roommate. Her summer takes a surprising turn when she meets an attractive stranger named Ice, who turns out to be, of all things, a cat shapeshifter. She is then dragged into a complicated world of hidden supernatural happenings and soon realizes she might be well in over her head. This book starts off seeming like a fairly boilerplate supernatural romance in the vein of Twilight — awkward every-woman falls in love with super hot supernatural dude. However it becomes increasingly clear as the story goes on that this is not that kind of story. Watching the story turn from paranormal romance to paranormal thriller was really fascinating and I found myself staying up late reading just to find out what was going on. This story is incredibly slow-burn, and I worry that some potential readers might give up too soon. But I absolutely can’t wait to continue this series. No Ifs, Ands, or Buts No Land for Heroes by Cal Black Hard Mode: Yes I had to scan the list of forbidden words like six times to confirm it fits but I’m pretty sure it does. Anyway, this was an enjoyable weird western. Elven Deputy Berry is willing to do anything, even bend the law she is ostensibly sworn to protect, in order to keep her small town and her chosen family safe. But when a train robbery gone wrong pulls her back into a past she’d rather forget, she must face her demons once and for all. For the most part I really enjoyed this story throughout. There were a couple aspects that I was ehhhh on; for instance, in this setting elves take the place of Native Americans, leading me to wonder why there are no actual Native Americans (there are white and Black humans in this setting, so why not Indigenous?). I also would have liked more fantasy in my fantasy — despite there being elves and dragons and Legally Distinct Tieflings, those things almost feel like window dressing on what could have otherwise been perfectly excellent historical fiction. But No Land for Heroes nevertheless had excellent characters and an excellent plot and I can’t wait to see what the author comes up with next. Family Matters Awakening the Gods by Kristin Gleeson Hard Mode: …it’s complicated Saoirse’s life has gone downhill since she graduated from university. Unable to hold down a series of dead end jobs, the only times she truly feels alive is when she is playing music at her favorite pub in Dublin. Everything is turned on its head when her father mysteriously passes away, and a woman claiming to be her grandmother offers to let her stay with her in rural Cork. There, she meets a hot blacksmith, and comes to learn that her entire life might have been constructed on lies and that she is, in fact, the reincarnation of the goddess Brigid. Unfortunately, Balor, the ancient enemy of the Irish gods, is also back in the picture, and ready to cause trouble. My favorite aspect of this book was the way it really made the setting come to life. I felt like I was there in Ireland with the characters. The romance was also well done, though I found myself getting frustrated as certain characters get angry at each other for reasons that seem irrational to the reader and aren’t explained. Still, this is a great book for anyone who likes Irish mythology, urban fantasy, and romance. submitted by dragon_morgan to Fantasy [link] [comments] |
2023.04.01 00:56 graveyardmemorial Am I [27F] experiencing gaslighting by her [38F] or am I just incredibly misinformed?
I talked to my psychologist about how I don't think vaginas are appreciated and so this made me lose any interest in sex. I gave examples.
I told her straight men sexualise and fetishize women who have penises but straight women and gay men don't do that with men who have vaginas. And that this means penises are more liked & valued. She said the vast majority of men have no interest in transgender women pre op and post op and that the vast majority have no interest in women who have penises nor that type of porn, sex work/sex tourism industry.
I said men are more attracted to a performance or costume of femininity (clothes, makeup, hair) than they are to actual women, so they are attracted to feminized men, and find a woman with an unshaven body, an overweight woman, very short hair woman or UNfeminine woman more of a turn off than feminized men. And that men think femininity=submissive and wanting to be fucked. So the men who look feminine are seen in that way. Whereas women and gay men are attracted to both feminine men and masculine men (think of all the androgynous male celeb heartthrobs over the years) and not just to masculinity itself, so they would find feminine men less of a turn off than masculine women. She said not at all.
I said oral is believed to be much more commonly performed on men than performed on women, and that this difference isn't because of men being selfish, since gay men are men and very commonly give oral. She said oral is 50/50 between the genders.
I said vaginas are seen as gross and taboo and have stigma and that penises are more casual and normalised. She said not at all. She also said periods are not taboo. I said gay men are known to be far more openly disgusted by and insulting about vaginas than lesbians are about penises. She said not at all. I said lesbians are more open to transgender women than gay men are open to transgender men. She said not at all.
I said large penises, boobs and butts are more appreciated and liked than any vagina type. I said that many bisexual men say that they are bi just for penis but not for the rest of a man and many bisexual women say that they are bisexual for the rest of a woman but not the vagina. I said sex is not viewed as real sex without a penis and that sex is viewed to be all about the penis, so lesbian sex is not taken seriously. She said not at all.
I said vaginas are seen as submissive and penises are seen as dominant and that people think sexually dominant women are mostly about penis imitation in the form of strap ons and pegging. She said not at all.
I meant these things generally (not about every person) and she said I was wrong about the vast majority of people. I even asked my parents and sister in separate occasions, and they agreed with her.
What do you think?
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2023.04.01 00:56 Valuable-Banana96 I wrote a parody song in preparation for Trump getting sentenced to lethal injection for Treason. Where should I put it?
You Give our land a Bad Name
(parody of “you give love a bad name” by
Bon Jovi)
Shot in the arm, and you're to blame Darlin', you give our land a bad name A greater nation is what you sell You promised us heaven, then put us through hell Chains of dumb got a hold on me When MAGA’s a prison, you can't break free Whoa-oh-oh, your crimes are undone, yeah Whoa-oh-oh, there's nowhere to run No one can save you The damage is done Shot in the arm, and you're to blame Darlin', you give our land a bad name I place my vote and you play your game You give our land a bad name (bad name) Hey, you give our land A bad name Paint your lies on your lips Bloodthirsty mobs at your fingertips A spoiled brat, your end is nye Be sure to tell Epstien your victims say hi! Whoa-oh-oh, your crimes are undone, yeah Whoa-oh-oh, there's nowhere to run No one can save you The damage is done Shot in the arm, and you're to blame Darlin', you give our land a bad name (bad name) I place my vote and you play your game you give our land a bad name (bad name) You give our land, oh Oh Shot in the arm, and you're to blame Darlin', you give our land a bad name I place my vote and you play your game you give our land a bad name (bad name) Shot in the arm, and you're to blame you give our land a bad name (bad name) I place my vote and you play your game you give our land a bad name (bad name) You give our land You give our land Bad name You give our land You give our land Bad name You give our land You give our land a bad name You give our land You give our land a bad name submitted by
Valuable-Banana96 to
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2023.04.01 00:55 Dhunter001 Even with the high risk of Mask of Bakris + Rat King, it's still one of my favorite PVP builds.
DIM Link There were a couple of nerfs that hurt this build's lethality over that past few seasons: slower swap speed, the removal of the Surprise Attack mod in Lighfall, and the nerf to invisibility (which I'm still
really annoyed about, tbh - considering how
MUCH STRONGER invis was pre-Void 3.0).
With those nerfs, I can't play as aggressive as I used to. Coupled with the meta changing like a million times since I last played PVP - IMO, while
definitely weaker, it's still pretty lethal.
If you're not familiar with the play style, it revolves around bow swapping. Prime opponent with whatever precision bow you like (Point of the Stag is a great option) > swap to clean up with Rat King >
(if there's a close range flank attempt) > dodge to slow enemy, reload, go invis, and heal all in one move > desecrate flanker for a 2 for 1. Back in the day, it was much easier to go on insane kill streaks with Rat King (or any sidearm) because of Surprise Attack, but while it's still possible, you just need to work for them a bit more.
A glaring weakness with this build - outside of the aforementioned nerfs, is MoB's dodge cooldown. This makes the build very high risk, high reward. And I'd be afraid to go against someone who has mastered it.
But I can't tell you satisfying it is to shut people down using some off meta build that's a shell of its former self.
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2023.04.01 00:55 graveyardmemorial Am I [27F] experiencing gaslighting by her [38F] or am I just incredibly misinformed?
I talked to my psychologist about how I don't think vaginas are appreciated and so this made me lose any interest in sex. I gave examples.
I told her straight men sexualise and fetishize women who have penises but straight women and gay men don't do that with men who have vaginas. And that this means penises are more liked & valued. She said the vast majority of men have no interest in transgender women pre op and post op and that the vast majority have no interest in women who have penises nor that type of porn, sex work/sex tourism industry.
I said men are more attracted to a performance or costume of femininity (clothes, makeup, hair) than they are to actual women, so they are attracted to feminized men, and find a woman with an unshaven body, an overweight woman, very short hair woman or UNfeminine woman more of a turn off than feminized men. And that men think femininity=submissive and wanting to be fucked. So the men who look feminine are seen in that way. Whereas women and gay men are attracted to both feminine men and masculine men (think of all the androgynous male celeb heartthrobs over the years) and not just to masculinity itself, so they would find feminine men less of a turn off than masculine women. She said not at all.
I said oral is believed to be much more commonly performed on men than performed on women, and that this difference isn't because of men being selfish, since gay men are men and very commonly give oral. She said oral is 50/50 between the genders.
I said vaginas are seen as gross and taboo and have stigma and that penises are more casual and normalised. She said not at all. She also said periods are not taboo. I said gay men are known to be far more openly disgusted by and insulting about vaginas than lesbians are about penises. She said not at all. I said lesbians are more open to transgender women than gay men are open to transgender men. She said not at all.
I said large penises, boobs and butts are more appreciated and liked than any vagina type. I said that many bisexual men say that they are bi just for penis but not for the rest of a man and many bisexual women say that they are bisexual for the rest of a woman but not the vagina. I said sex is not viewed as real sex without a penis and that sex is viewed to be all about the penis, so lesbian sex is not taken seriously. She said not at all.
I said vaginas are seen as submissive and penises are seen as dominant and that people think sexually dominant women are mostly about penis imitation in the form of strap ons and pegging. She said not at all.
I meant these things generally (not about every person) and she said I was wrong about the vast majority of people. I even asked my parents and sister in separate occasions, and they agreed with her.
What do you think?
submitted by
graveyardmemorial to
confessions [link] [comments]
2023.04.01 00:55 Unfair-Sprinkles2912 Androgynous alternative to bikershorts
Usually pretty active in the summer and like overall comfort and somewhat tight fitted shorts but because of my overall style I've got comments that my biker shorts come off as boxers lol 🙄
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Unfair-Sprinkles2912 to
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2023.04.01 00:55 kiyi13 I HATE my roommate
I moved into my boyfriends house and he lives with 2 other people (3 including me). He lives with his cousin who we will call Z and his cousins girlfriend who we will call S. I like Z, my problem is with S. She makes me angry just looking at her. She is a huge bully and just rude. When I was in the process of moving in she was so kind and sweet. We were setting up boundaries for everyone. So I was like oh cool her and I could be friends...WRONG. On the first day, she had issues with me and what I was bringing. I was moving out of my moms house so all I really had to bring was everything from my room. I brought kitchen supplies from my moms too that I bought. Like seasonings, smores maker, snow cone marker etc. Her problem was the seasoning. I brought too many, so while I am upstairs unpacking I hear a door slam. Then my boyfriend gets a text from Z saying S is made because now there are too many seasoning. It was not like I just put all the seasoning where I wanted them. We have a whole cabinet full of seasoning already. That was a couple months ago, I was like that was odd but whatever, maybe she had a bad day at work. THEN she yelled at me and my boyfriend that we have too many ranches in the fridge. When she bought 3 bottles of them, however we try not to touch her stuff because she is a lot. We buy our own separate food. Also her ranches are flavored and has not normal plain ranch. My boyfriend and I are in the kitchen making salads and S comes stomping out of the room SCREAMING. Talking about "we need to stop buying ranch. We have 5 bottles of ranch for no reason!" I just looked at her because dude its just ranch dressing. Then Z came and calmed her down and went through all the ranches; all three of her bottles were over a year old and needed to be thrown away. After this I started staying away from her. FAST FOWARD to this week. Right before I moved in, I told everyone I am getting a cat later. I love cats. Moving out of my moms house and leaving my cat was very hard. I asked if that was fine if I adopted a cat. Everyone was like yeah sure thats cool. I assumed it would be fine because the household already has 2 cats. They are S and Z's cats, I want my own. I have been searching for cats to adopt and on Monday I texted S directly because Z does not really care about much, as long as bills are paid. Anyways I texted S saying "How will your cats react to a new cat. I am thinking about getting one in the summer after school is out (I work at a school)". A day goes by she read it and did not reply. I was like maybe she got busy at work. At home she does not even talk to me. a full 24 hours goes by and she is like 'Sorry but Z and I think that is an awful idea. Cats are a lot of work and I do not want another cat to be responsible for". After I received this text I was dumbfounded. She did not even answer how the cats would react. And why would she be responsible for MY cat. My boyfriend and I stay upstairs. We have our bedroom, a bathroom and a loft. Z and S have the whole downstairs. The only shared space we have is the kitchen. I could put up a gate. I was solutions for everything. I show my boyfriend the text and he is so angry too because why can they have cats but I cannot. I pay rent so I should have the same rights as everyone. My boyfriend texts Z being like "we do not understand why this is such a huge problem". Then S texted in our household gc saying "I know the news is very hard for her to hear ..." like I am not in the groupchat. I call a family meeting and it is the most pointless meeting ever. She talked to my boyfriend and I like we are children. Telling us the responsibilities of a cat like I did not have 2 growing up. Then when I moved out I left our family cat there (it was my grandmas and we inherited after my gma died). She tried to bully us out of getting a cat saying we have to pay IN FULL any damages my cat does. "If the cat shreds the couch" or "attacks MY cats". I planned on giving limited interaction between the cats because she has already made it clear that no harm needs to be done to HER cats. I dont know what animal she expects me to bring home but it must be a mountain lion if the cat is going to attack her cats and kill them and shred the whole house. I am going to adopt a cat that is potty trained and pretty well-behaved. she also said "MY CATS will NOT BE PUNISHED. you will not lock them in a room, spank them or anything". LIKE HUH, I have lived with them for a few months and she screams at them everyday. It seems like she does not like her own cats. It has never crossed my mind to punish a cat. I had 2 of them and have never had that thought. I have never harmed her cats in any way. I just did not like the way she tried to bully me out of getting a cat. Then the seasoning and ranch. She is just rude. She acts like its her house and me and my boyfriend just live here with her. She has some type of superiority complex because she is older. I just cannot stand her and I have been avoiding her all week. I want to move out but this house is so nice and my boyfriend does not want to move out either. Looks like I am stuck with one of the rudest roommates ever. My college roommates were awful but this is much more than that. Wish me good luck with her.
AND yes I am still getting a cat in the summer. She was fuming after that household meeting because she thought she'd talk us out of it.
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2023.04.01 00:54 Harlie_ I don’t have IIH??
I went to see a ophthalmologist surgeon who does surgery for people specifically for IIH. The plan was to discuss me getting surgery. However it went completely different and I’m upset and confused. He said that based off of my previous test and the exam he did on me today. He doesn’t think I have IIH. Which I get is a really good thing. But if I don’t have it, what’s wrong with me? I have the same symptoms of IIH and I’m on 2,000mg of Diamox a day. I’m so frustrated and confused. The surgeon is going to contact my doctors in charge of my IIH and tell them and see if they agree with taking me off Diamox for like 2 months then have me go back and see him. I’m scared to do it. And I’m so frustrated because I’m back at step 1.
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2023.04.01 00:54 damaged_eardrums How do you handle regrades?
I’m a PhD student, and I just finished TA’ing my first quarter. For each of our 3 exams, we accepted regrade requests. Overall, I do think regrades are a nice system to try to keep grading fair and to make sure students are maximizing their points. However, I feel like many regrades were attempts to “throw darts all over the board,” in the sense that they weren’t substantiated, but the students just wanted to grab points wherever they could. Out of all my regrade requests, about 15 questions throughout the whole quarter, only 1 student got 1 point back. It seems like a major time drain at this point. Would it be fair to take points off from students who have “unsubstantiated” regrade requests? To make sure students aren’t just submitting regrade requests without a solid reason?
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2023.04.01 00:54 Leading_Juice_9042 Rats on patio because of trash, but I'm deathly afraid and don't know how to approach the situation
Currently, 2-3 rats are regularly visiting / living on the patio of our apartment. The city where I live only collects garbage once every week and a half, with a limit of three bags per household. Unfortunately, we often generate more than three bags and do not like to keep them in the kitchen due to the smell. We decided that we'd place the bags just outside the patio door and planned to move them into the bin the morning after the garbage collection.
However, it's winter here and snowfalls are heavy, and the bags got covered in about 2-3 feet of snow quickly. About two weeks later we've spotted 2-3 rats on the step in the garbage, running in and out from under the snow bank. We're very scared of the rats and don't know how to approach the situation. We're afraid that if we open the door to remove the bags, the rats will enter the house. We cannot go around back to the patio from the front door either because it's about 7ft off the ground.
We're students and don't have a lot of money to get an exterminator, and would also not like to get the landlord involved.
Any advice on how to deal with this situation would be greatly appreciated.
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2023.04.01 00:53 Odd-Secretary4796 I feel like a failure
Hello Everyone: for some context I am in an accelerated BSN program which is everything you need for a bachelors in nursing in 16 months. This program is for people who have had a bachelors previously and mine was in psychology. I graduated with a bachelors in psych in 2021 ans then realized I wanted to go into nursing. Anyway, I started in August of 2022 and am currently halfway through. I have been really struggling with not comparing myself to others especially grade wise. Its a small cohort so everyone kind of knows who is who and whats going on and theres always those annoying people who bitch about having a 99. I am aware that some people have past experience which helps them but I truly have never worked and studied so hard in my life. I feel like I am barely keeping a float sometimes and although I understand it when I talk about it its hard for me to identify it or think of it under the stress of taking the test. I have bad test anxiety so that is a part of it as well. Anyway I worked really hard to try and keep my GPA above a 3.5 so I could get into the honor society and after this most recent session I got a B- that tanked my GPA ( since we only take like 3/ 4 classes a session) and I just found out I didn’t make it in. I know its dumb and doesn’t matter but with my self confidence issues already I just felt like I really needed that boost. I am doing well generally speaking and I got all B’s this session which I am grateful for it just stinks. I feel like everyones going to know and talk about whose in it or bitch about how they got in and blah blah blah. Any advice on how to not let it get to you? I feel stupid
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2023.04.01 00:53 QueerCatCarrier Found another!
2023.04.01 00:53 kariskuts AITH for going off on my addict aunt?
I (23F) recently went off on my aunt (36F) for guilt tripping me. My aunt has had issues with drugs and alcohol as early as 15yrs old. I know this because my late father, her brother, had told me about all the times he’s had to help her or tried to help her and was not successful because she never takes accountability or thinks she should face consequences. He told me this because a few years back when I was 17 and my cousin, her son, was 6, she brought us with her to pick up pills and told him to keep it a secret from his step dad. This angered me because he’s literally a child. Do whatever you want with your life but do not ever make children go through it too. Anyway since then, she never really slowed down at all. It got even worse after my father passed away a year and a half ago. I moved across the country but I kept getting updates of the things she would do and the kids were aware of all of it. The tipping point was this past month. She got pulled over and arrested for drunk driving and my little cousin was in the car at the time and had to be taken home by the police. I was furious with her to the point where I was researching how to possibly adopt my cousin if she loses custody of him. I chose to not speak to her for a while because I knew she was going through it and I wouldn’t have anything nice to say. She messaged me out of the blue the other night and basically told me that I need to get off my high horse because me and my mom have messed up in the past and she never closed her doors to us. Then brought up my son and said “tell him he has an aunt that loves him.” It set me off and I let loose on her because how dare she attack my mom and bring up my son in the same breath. I wasn’t mean but I basically let her know that I don’t approve of her decisions only because she constantly allows them to negatively impact almost every child in our family. She then went off and started attacking everybody in the family. It hurts to watch her struggle with this sickness but she refuses to take accountability or stay in treatment long enough to see any results. Was I wrong to go off on her when she is already down?
TLDR am I the AH for telling off my aunt for guilt tripping me into talking to her after she got a DUI with my cousin in the car ?
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2023.04.01 00:53 actuallyanangel I have no idea what to do to have healthy, sustainable weight loss
Hi! I think this is my first time posting here, but I've lurked for SO long (like years). I'm 23F, 5'7 and I weigh 110kg. I've been on the highest weight percentile all my childhood, and was always bigger than my friends, but I went to a very sporty boarding school and did SO much sports that I was always fairly muscley, and even though I thought I was fat at the time, I was pretty much just a strong, tall kid.
When I was about 16 I got really sick and nobody knew what was wrong. I kept throwing up, and I had really awful, uncontrolled emetophobia so I stopped eating (and eventually drinking), and wound up in hospital with an NG tube. The doctors all thought I had an eating disorder, so I was made to go to a bunch of group therapy, and being around so many other people with eating disorders really pushed me into counting calories. My whole life was so much out of my control (I had undiagnosed autism and at the time had just escaped with my mum from my dad who was abusive), and seeing the number on the scale they weighed me on at therapy go down made me feel like I was finally in control.
I did a lot more therapy and got much better, but I was still really physically unwell. I took (and still take) a lot of emetics so I wasn't throwing up all the time, but I was just extremely tired and in pain all the time, so I couldn't keep up with the sports I used to do anymore. I was so used to be able to eat loads and then burn it all off doing sports, but because I wasn't active anymore I ended up gaining loads of weight.
I was diagnosed with a genetic condition called Ehlers Danlos when I was 19 which basically effects collagen production, so it means my joints are loose and dislocate easily (and are painful). I ended up basically loosing loads of my mobility over like 3 years (to the point where I need a stick to walk now). I know that my weight makes everything a million times worse, and that my QoL would be so much better if I lost the weight, but I really struggle with the emotional aspect of it, which is why I made this post and what I would love advice on.
Basically, I've tried to lose weight a few times over the last few years but I've never managed to sustain the loss or even just maintain it because it fucks with my head. I know how to loose weight, and when I count calories I consistently loose 2kg a week, but I'm apparently incapable of doing anything with moderation. It's like a switch flips in my head and I start obsessing. For example, yesterday I ate nothing all day and then my fiancé put like, 1TBSP of oil on some chicken he was gonna roast for us, and I just physically couldn't even contemplate eating it. I literally just sat in the sofa for like 2 hours and cried. Every time I'd go to get something to eat, I'd be consumed by the thought that if I ate now I'd be wasting calories that I might want later, or that the calories wouldn't be worth it, or that if I ate I'd be letting myself down by ruining my health.
If I was anywhere near a normal weight, I'd just say fuck it, my mental health is worth more than this, but given that my BMI is morbidly obese, my joints are awful anyway, and I have a family history of type 1 (my mum) and type 2 (my dad) diabetes, I know that it's really important I lose it. Plus I really want to have kids (and I want to have kids soon in case my mobility gets worse when I'm older) and we've tried for like a year with no success, which I think must be due to my weight.
I have no idea what to do to have healthy, sustainable weight loss and I'm at my wit's end. I think if I could exercise more I would have more success, because it helps keep my mental health in check and beats back the part of my brain that says I shouldn't eat, but all I can manage is doing 15 minutes of physio and 15 minutes fo yoga a day, and I barely do that. I just have no energy and am usually in pain which makes even just going for walks and stuff difficult.
I really hope someone has some advice, because I have no idea what to do!
Thank you :)
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2023.04.01 00:53 BlackHoleSunAstro93 I loved "The Expanse" as well as "Battlestar Galactica" but I wonder what the best space sci fi show of the 2000s and 2010s would be in a more optimistic world where 9/11 and the recession never happened as well as humanity done a much better job of controlling inequality
2023.04.01 00:52 baconslap_420 Is this malpractice? Need advice
So, I (35F) had been on Adderall on and off since I was 18 up until March of last year. Sometimes, I would take breaks from it. My doctor's never had issues with this. When I graduated college, I tapered off the Adderall and started taking Wellbutrin. About 6 months later I went back on Adderall. I have gone to psychiatrists/ psychologists my whole life and that is primarily where I got my meds. I take several other meds.
In 2019, I moved from TN to PA. I found a general practitioner and she agreed to prescribe me my psych meds so that I wouldnt go without my meds. The plan was for me to eventually find a psychiatrist. That doctor transferred to anpther office and I got put on another doctors caseload. He continued to prescribe me all of my meds, including my Adderall.
The issue started in 2020. There had been a mix up with my insurance company and my insurance had lapsed, unbeknownst to me. I was sick during this time so I went to the doctor 3 or 5 times. They didn't say anything about my insurance lapsing for a few weeks. Due to this, I ended up with like an $800 bill. However, I was under the impression that my insurance company was going to pay it and so was the doctors office. I submitted all the bills and paperwork several times. I was going back and forth with my insurance company fpr months. Finally after about 6 months of getting nowhere, I started making small payments towards the bill. This was during COVID and I was unemployed so sometimes it was only $5 or $10. even while I was making payments I was under the impression that my insurance was going to pay. Fast forward to December 2020. I go to my first doctor's appointment since April. Durijg this time, he had still been filling my meds, I just hadn't been in to the office. During this visit, my doctor and his resident student proceed to ask me a million questions about my Adderall. I wasn't working at the time so I get didn't think that I needed it. The doctor told me that I was too old to be taking it ( I was 33). He literally told me that I shouldn't need it anymore because I'm not in school. Be then proceeded to go on a rqmpage about cocaine. I don't have a history with cocaine and have never failf a drug test. He then screamed at me abojt my bill ( which I had been making small payments on) and told me that if I didn't want to pay, he didn't have time to and I could go to the free clinic with everyone else. I left the office in tears. I called the office manager and she put me with a different doctor.
It's important to note that because I was taking Adderall, I had to be drug tested every 3 months or so, I guess to make sure that I had Adderall in my system. The problem with this was that the doctor got to a point where he wouldn't prescribe any of my meds until I made a payment towards my balace. Becaywe of this, there were many Montsh were I ran out of my meds fpr a week pr two because I couldn't pay. Due to this, I basically never had Adderall in my system when they tested me. It was never an issue.
Last April, I called them on the day that my meds needed to be refilled. I was working a pretty good job and was able to make a payment that day, instead of having to wait. I was not due for a med check. So I call them, the they tell me that I need for come in for a urine before they'll send.mt.meds over. This immediately was suspicious because I wasn't due for a med check, and any other time they'd prescribe my meds even when my results hadn't come back. They told me that I had to come in that day and that they cpuldnt give me my meds until the results came back.
So I go in there and pee and make a payment. As I'm leaving they tell me I still have to make an appointment for a med check. Weird Because I had just taken the drug test. After this, they get really wierd. I wait until. I know my drug test was back and call them to fill my meds. They say ok but never do it. They start passing me aroud from person to person when I call the office. They won't let me speak to my actual doctor or the office manager. Then, they get really nasty. They say I didn't have Adderall in my system. I said I know, because I ran out like I always do. They tell me I shouldnt have run out. The last drug test I had taken before this was in December 2021 and I didtn have Adderall in my system then. They tell me that even if I was out I should have had trace amoints of Adderall in my system. I tell them ove been taking it for 17 ywars and I've never heard that and if that's true, why didn't you guys say anything all the other months? Then I get a letter from them, dropping me as a client becausw I "violated the controlled substance contracy' because I didn't have Adderall in my system... I DIDNT HAVE ADDERALL IN MY SYSTEM FOR ALMOST EVERY DRUG TEST OVER 3 YEARS. They won't talk to me. on the phone. I try to go the office ( which was literally the building rifht next to my @apt) and they close the gate to the parkong lot so I can't get in. I finally call their after hours and the after hours nurse tells me that they think I'm selling my meds. So my Dr just woke up one day and decided I was selling my meds? Im pretty sure that a girl that had been staying with me and who I had recently kicked out called them. She callwe my.landlord on the same day that this started and told him that I was selling drugs. He knew it wasn't true and we laughed about it Anyways, because of this, I havent been to th doctor in almost a year. I went off all of my meds cold turkey and I'm afraid to go to another doctor because I don't know what to tell them and I'm afraid that they'll judge me and Shame.me qnd I can't handle that I went to the dr office last week to try to get copies of my records for myself and they wouldn't give them to me. The manager screamed at me that I lied to her face and threatened to call the cops.
As a result of going off of.my meds cold turkey, I went off tg deep end and stared drinking uncontrollably. I've been to rehab twice since July..I know that this is a result of me being unmedicated fpt my ADHD. It's like I regressed back to a child. I don't know what to do. I need advice
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2023.04.01 00:51 kkfit3 Me (23f) and (21m) boyfriend
my boyfriend and i were fighting a lot, i was extremely irritable from recent IUD placement and i was just recently diagnosed with PMDD. It got too much for him and he almost broke up with me 2 weeks ago. We talked it out, and things have been smooth since. I have a new psychiatrist, going on meds that will help me so i feel more at ease that my fight (in fight vs flight) wasn’t all me, it was my PMDD and IUD. Im glad things are good but since then, i’ve felt closed off and he’s taking extra effort to be caring and supportive. But it’s like my emotions are shut off and i’m defensive mode. Will this eventually go away? it takes a long time for someone like me to be vulnerable and that was just a reality check. Any advice is appreciated.
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2023.04.01 00:51 Meansisterthroway AITA for kicking my sister out of the car and making her walk home in the freezing cold
I (21M) have a sister (17F) who usually gets a ride home from school. This ride home from school is given by one of my parents about 99% of the time (they're both older and pretty much retired so they have the free time). I'm in university currently doing my last year of a pretty heavy science degree. I live at home because my uni is fairly close. My sister thinks that because I live at home and dont have a job this means that I have no responsibilites and infinite free time. This truly isnt the case but I never saw a point in arguing it so I didnt bother to contest when she makes her little comments at me (your lazy etc).
Last week she wanted a ride home from school from me. At first she texted me "heyyyyyy OP can I pleaseeeee get a ride home from school". she texted me this with around 2 hours before school would be let out so I told her that I wasnt sure because I was at the library but that I would think about it. Around an hour later she texted me again "I really dont see why you cant give me a ride its not like you have any real obligations" I responded with basiclaly the same thing saying, "im not sure if I can". Finally about a half hour before school let out she said "OP its literally freezing out dont be an ass and drive me home". I caved and left the library to drive her home
On the ride home I commented that the weather was actually pretty nice (about ten degrees celcius with a bit of a drizzle). Its clear she took this as an insult or something because she responded with "oh my god your so fucking lazy, you dont even have a job stop fucking complaining and just drive". something about this particular comment set me off. So i pulled over and told her to get out. I didnt yell but when she protested I said "get the fuck out before I flip my shit".
She walked home and when she got home she was bawling her eyes out. Later that night my mom got mad at me, however I responded by saying that its literally a 5 minute drive and a 15 minute walk, its not like i made her run a marathon or anything.
So reddit AITA?
Premature edit: Just to remove any confusion the walk home is 15 minutes in a suburban area. I walked home everyday when I went to that school but the family dynamic was different back then
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2023.04.01 00:50 UndyingMoon93 Friendship advice? Not wanting to continue this friendship
So we met in 2020, and we had a rough patch in our friendship which resulted in her blocking me out of nowhere on EVERY thing. It hurt me for a year straight. She just did it out of nowhere, and then a year later, in 2021, she messages me on Facebook with VERY long messages saying how sorry she was and how she was sorry for being a bad friend to me and stuff and etc.
Im 29, and she's 27. We're both female.
I took her back into my life, cause no one has ever reached back out to me after screwing over our friendship before. We got close again for a while, but this past month for some reason I have been wanting to be completely alone. We are both gamers, but the difference is I have kids and an almost 11 year relationship with my fiance (their dad). She has a boyfriend but no kids, so its hard for her to understand why I can't ALWAYS play games and why I wanna be alone during the week that my fiance is off work, or I wanna spend it with him instead.
I feel like I'm obligated to keep up with games that she has a server on as well. She likes doing group stuff with people and I'm way too introverted to be doing all that. I value my time (since I don't get it much when my fiance works due to kids), and I value doing single player games anyway. I don't like feeling as if I have to be active on a game or online or else someone will get upset or mad at me.
I have been replying to her less and less throughout the day, because it gets tiring texting someone CONSTANTLY all day every day and never looking up from my phone. I'm surprised I don't have a sore fucking neck all the time from it. I'm only getting older and as I mature, I realize I don't wanna spend my entire life on the internet and strictly games. I have other priorities now. What makes it worse is I was planning to visit her this year later on, but i'm not sure how that will work as I have kids and my fiance and I arent sure whether or not his family can even watch them for a few days, and I have never ever traveled alone in my life which scares me a little bit. I don't want my first experience on a plane, to be sitting next to some stranger or have very bad anxiety alone. I feel like if I go quiet for a few days, she would blow up at me for doing other stuff besides talking or playing games with her
Do I keep distancing myself more and more? Confrontation scares the fuck out of me, and I worry that it was stupid to have taken her back in the first place. Because I just don't feel as close to her anymore like I used to feel..
I admit I even neglected spending time with my kids back then just to play games with her, and neglected spending time with my own fiance. But now I don't give a shit and I'm sick of feeling scared to go a day without messaging due to upsetting her.
Has anyone ever felt like having friendships is overwhelming as fuck on top of being a parent? I think its cause with the free time that I DO get whenever my fiance is home 4 days a week which he even lets me go to our room to play video games alone most days, is mainly the time I wanna take to myself, not spend time with more people demanding my time. Maybe friendships just aren't for me.
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