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Debt Management Tips
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Debt Management Tips from Debt Solutions managers.
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This is a subreddit dedicated to providing a supportive, empathetic, and practical place to talk about student loan debt and experiences related to student loan debt.
2023.06.08 10:10 ncCofshodeChone How to Develop Better Note-Taking Techniques
Note-taking is a fundamental skill that plays a crucial role in effective learning and information retention. However, many people struggle to develop effective note-taking techniques. In this article, we will explore various strategies and tips that can help you improve your note-taking skills and make the most out of your study sessions.
- Be Prepared: Before attending a lecture, it's essential to be prepared. Familiarize yourself with the topic or subject matter beforehand. This preliminary knowledge will allow you to follow along more effectively during the lecture and make meaningful connections between concepts.
- Choose the Right Tools: Selecting the appropriate tools for note-taking is vital. Consider whether you prefer taking notes digitally or using pen and paper. Experiment with different options to find what works best for you. Some popular choices include physical notebooks, digital note-taking apps, or a combination of both.
- Use Structured Formats: Organizing your notes in a structured format can enhance comprehension and retrieval. One effective method is the Cornell Note-Taking System. Divide your paper into three sections: a narrow column on the left for cues and questions, a larger area on the right for the main notes, and a section at the bottom for summarizing the main points. This format encourages active engagement and facilitates review.
- Actively Engage with the Material: Engage actively with the material while taking notes. Instead of passively transcribing what the lecturer says, listen actively, and try to identify key points, main ideas, and supporting details. Use abbreviations, symbols, and diagrams to condense information and make connections between concepts.
- Be Selective: Avoid the temptation to write down every single word the lecturer says. Instead, focus on capturing the most critical information. Listen for cues such as repeated phrases, emphasized points, or visual aids, which can indicate the significance of certain information. Being selective allows you to concentrate on understanding and processing the material better.
- Review and Revise: Regularly reviewing and revising your notes is essential for long-term retention. Take some time after each lecture to review and clarify any unclear or incomplete sections. Summarize the main points in your own words, as this reinforces understanding and helps consolidate the information in your memory.
- Utilize Visual Aids: Visual aids such as diagrams, charts, and mind maps can be powerful tools for note-taking. They help organize information spatially and facilitate understanding of complex concepts. Experiment with different visual representations to find what works best for you.
- Collaborate and Share: Consider collaborating with classmates and sharing notes. This can provide different perspectives and fill in any gaps in your own notes. Additionally, discussing the material with others can deepen your understanding and help reinforce key concepts.
Improving your note-taking techniques requires practice, experimentation, and a willingness to adapt. By implementing the strategies outlined in this article, you can develop more effective note-taking skills that will enhance your learning experience and improve your academic performance.
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2023.06.08 10:09 MexicanMamba92 Buy More!! You wont regret it.
Imagine being there live as a kid being able to get the very first print run of pokemon or yugioh..well this is even better. Gambling, suspense, collecting, beautiful art, amazing quality, scarcity and best of all we can still buy more before they sell out. 102,000 packs ever made of these first edition people! Wake tf up and get in debt! š. 5k collectors is 20 packs per person(very conservative number) i dont think people understand how rare these will become. This is your chance at a base set pokemon or that Legend Of Blue Eyes White Dragon box but better
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2023.06.08 10:08 Throwawayanon642 I'm incredibly embarrassed and ashamed to admit this, but here we go.
I need to get this off my chest, throwaway account for obvious reasons. (Looong post. Grab some wine and a snack.)
I feel like I've allowed myself to become a doormat and a fool and walked into a trap.
My DH and I have been together now for almost 12 years, got married 4 years ago. We have 1 son, 1 on the way and I am just so ashamed I even let this happen to me.
For starters, my husband and I live with my parents. My husband has a decent job, started his career while I went to college. The plan, or so I thought, was to finish college, he'd have a head start good paying career and we'd move when I graduated. Well, we got married right after I graduated college and that's when covid hit, about 6 months later. I had a small part time job at the time which ultimately I was fired from for downsizing during the covid chaos. This is when I started staying home. He swore up and down and convinced me "our" dream of me being a SAHM was a reality. I wouldn't have to work. It wouldn't effect anything for us bc my income was so incredibly low I didn't contribute financially anyway. Which was 100% true that wasn't a lie.
So, needless to say I didn't find another job and settled into at home life. Which I enjoyed 100%. I loved being in charge of the home. We did live with my parents still, I took on some of their chores and house work too. But the goal was still the same. To leave. The issue then was the market boomed (if you're from the US you know how insane it was) so we pushed back the plan to buy a home which at the time I thought was reasonable considering around the area we needed to live for his job was basically selling run down hoarder houses for no less than 250k. This was 2021.
During 2021 I fell pregnant. At the time I was thrilled despite the living situation. I was under the assumption we wouldn't be here long and tbh a FTM with a newborn, I liked the idea of having the help from my parents. I had my son, he's amazing. I love him and don't regret having him. However, as 2022 started I started pressuring my husband to move out. Get the ball rolling. To his credit he did find an agent, but started talking about how we didn't make enough. (Weird considering his job only got better during this time, housing stabilized a bit, and wtf you said we could do this?) At first I thought it might be cold feet. A newborn, turned infant, scared FTD, we got a lot of help in the early days from my parents. We had it easy to say the least.
I left the topic alone for a little, maybe a couple months and revisited it. He again started claiming we would need 200k in the bank, we would need at least 30k down, we would need this and that and basically saying it will never happen. I combats this argument. I grew up poor. Very poor actually. I'd start saying things like idk how you think my parents help us and helped my sister with her kids when they make significantly less than you do. And even my sister today has 6 kids and is a SAHM with a husband who makes 20-30k less a year. His ideas on how much people need to survive were wild to me. Of course I don't want to live poor, but we wouldn't be anyway. He had gotten a promotion. Unlimited over time whenever and if he wanted it. I was genuinely confused and he ignored my attempts at a realistic conversation about it. And again, WTF YOU SAID WE COULD DO THIS. Not only that but I do not spend money. I find deals, I shop around, etc. Again growing up poor you know how to make a dollar stretch a mile and it's just in me to do this. There is no way we can't make it work for our family. I even have a friend who has a son and her and her husband combined don't make as much as my husband. They are comfortable. Buying new cars, debt free, new cloths, trips etc.
I knew the market wasn't amazing still. I thought maybe it's bc he still sees houses for 250k+ and he just is scared to jump. I spoke to this agent and told her to send us over some houses lower than our initial target price point. There were some pretty decent houses. Cue me sending them over a few months and getting nothing but excuse after excuse. Or "I don't want to live there." Or "yeah but we'd have to renovate this or that" but also coupled with the confusing statement of "we can afford a 200k house why is she sending us these?" So it's turned into a cat and mouse game of. Can we not afford 200k? Or can we? What is going on?!?? When I asked him why he kept doing this flip flopping he used the amazingly dumb excuse of "well you deserve xyz" which is a cop-out in my opinion.
The end of 2022 hit, I started feeling stupid, defeated and worn out. I gave up. I just figured I'd learn to accept ill be the person who lives with their parents forever and my life will be hell with no privacy, nothing to call my own and in early 2023... oops. Pregnant. Again. On the pill. A cruel joke the universe had on me? Idk. I'm currently 22 weeks pregnant.
At this point we live in my parents (admittedly finished and nice) basement, no rooms. No doors. With a crib shoved in a corner for my son. No room to grow with a new baby on the way. My parents are while nice about it very much at their stage of life wanting to not have a bunch of baby things everywhere, so the basement is PACKED im constantly running into things, kicking toys around, I have no room and some how we have to fit another human being down here.
Currently my husband is STILL insisting we can't afford to move. He won't even entertain the idea of it anymore. And to top it all off, our marriage is in shambles. He routinely ignores any of my needs and wants. He constantly has a bad attitude. He is always annoyed, always running from reality and even my parents have noticed, even though I don't say anything about my marriage, how unhelpful, lazy and rude he has been. My mom has even said one night when he working overtime "well it's not like he helps you anyway." If he's home he sits on YouTube or plays video games and I'll be honest, I give up.
I feel like I have exhusted this topic to the point he refuses to engage with it. We barely speak about anything of value and I basically go about my day as If I was a single mom living with my parents and being THEIR live in maid. I feel betrayed. Like he sold me a lie. I feel stupid for even believing him. I feel trapped being unexpectedly pregnant. Idk what to do.
I have set up a therapy session for myself. I'm hoping this helps me just come to terms with everything and figure out my next steps and ultimately, idk. I just feel like I need someone to talk to about it so I signed up for it.
I feel trapped by an over grown toddler of a man who is simply living his best life rent free while his wife is miserable and cries alone at night trying not to wake her child. All bc I was too gullible in believing this man. Believed he'd be a provider. A good daddada great husbsnd. Now left with an embarrassing life and I'm so ashamed I'm bringing another child into this even if i will love them.
If you've made it this far, I appreciate you. Thank you for letting me vent. Idk anymore I feel fucking stupid. It's embarrassing to even post this anonymously.
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2023.06.08 10:03 Wooxy117 6/8/23 Thursday Premarket-Afterhours. SPY is š. BTC is š. HSI is š. IFUS Hype, Writing Post Later On It. GME Earnings Tanked. REI In Uptrend. Letās Win Together! š
| "Some debts are fun when you are acquiring them, but none are fun when you set about retiring them." ā Ogden Nash. Premarket Good Morning everyone! āļø Here is my premarket report. Letās have a great Thursday with some wins! Here are some potential winners. Some tickers listed may not be heavy green currently as they open up later: DAILY WINNERS/POTENTIAL PICKS The Big Four * SPY - is š * VIX - š Above $20 is bearish, below $20 is bullish * BTC - is š * HSI - is š Stocks/Daily Picks * APLD - Consistent winner * APPD - Consistent winner * BOIL - Has been on a consistent uptrend again * TORO - Huge short interest building up & company is sound * BBBYQ - Bankruptcy play is still in the air as we do not have all of the details yet. Slowly been walking up * BLBX - Consistent winner * REI * CXAI - Short interest increasing quite a bit * VIX - Loading up since SPY is running * UVXY - Same thing as VIX, only cheaper to load. I am in at $3.05 * MARA - Consistent winner * RIOT - Consistent winner * PBI * IFUS - Next big play Options * Spy - Straddles with itm calls & puts * Spy - Straggles leaning toward puts, Iāve been grabbing cheap ones 2:1 put:call ratio as I still think the market is going to fall hard * KRE - Strangles leaning toward puts * VIX - calls 1+ weeks out * Updating section Swing Trades * Updating section Previous After-hours (Ordered based on volume/%) * BAOS * ASST * CPHI * MGOL * ONCR * JWEL * ACOR Todays Movers * Will post closer to 4:30am ET Crypto * BTC - If this is pumping, the stocks under this will rally, likewise for any dips * CLSK * COIN * EH * MARA * MSTR * RIOT ALWAYS do your DD and make a rational decision that works the best for you, always. Nothing posted in these threads is financial advice in the least and should not be construed as such Hope these are some decent starting ideas and as always, letās get some wins! šš submitted by Wooxy117 to FriendsTogetherWeWin [link] [comments] |
2023.06.08 10:02 AutoModerator [Get] Private Wealth Academy ā High Credit Secrets Download
| Download : https://courseshere.com/download/get-private-wealth-academy-high-credit-secrets-download/ https://preview.redd.it/2fdncdf8qq4b1.png?width=640&format=png&auto=webp&s=8453b573b3b93ab2c2cd64e8e45808f2ac363721 What You Get: 11 SECRETS TO QUICKLY IMPROVE YOUR PERSONAL CREDIT SCORE AND GET HIGH-LIMIT CREDIT CARDS! Letās face the truth of the current situation: we live inside a financial matrix designed to make the rich-richer and the poor-poorer. Remember, a system that gives any individual more power than another, be it money, status or energy, will ultimately find itself in a pyramid of power type-structure. And once a power structure has been established, it will always need more willing participants to play. But there is a SECRET to wealth. In fact, ALL TRUTH IS HIDDEN IN PLAIN SIGHT. The only problem is we live in the age of information-overload. Our knowledge comes from many sources: disgruntled elites within the power structure, high-priced lawyers with wealthy clients, case law and our own research team. If left UNREALIZED it will create a new āDark Age of Debtā much like The Dark Ages of Serfdom of the past. Credit is the foundation upon which an empire is built! The extension of ācreditā to another in a fiat currency allows anyone to become a financial king. This is a wonderful time to be alive! Follow the rules and see how the elites rake in trillions from an unaware public and still follow the āGolden Rule ā Do Unto Others.ā If this knowledge was known to all, the system would balance itself quickly and after a harsh restructuring period, a type of financial utopia would be entered into. Howās The Credit Score Determined (& Then Manipulated)? The FICO (Fair Isaac Corporation) scoring system defines oneās ācredit worthinessā in society, the scale going from 300 to 850. The higher the score, the more credit one is allowed to access. There are few lending institutions that will give a line of credit if a score is less than 650. There are only a few exceptions to this (we tell you which ones to get inside). The best credit cards donāt accept anyone until you have a 720 score. submitted by AutoModerator to courseshereb [link] [comments] |
2023.06.08 10:02 Competitive_Text1914 Hells Kitchen 6th Place Season: Episode 12
Chef Gordon Ramsay said that now we were down to the final 8 that there would be no excuses and no one to hide behind anymore, saying that Santos left due to not being able to hold down the fish station by himself. Chef Ramsay also announced that the next challenge would involve a chef from each team making a crepe and Antonio was worried having not had that much experience with crepes but Nikki was pumped having made many crepes. The blue team were struggling at actually making crepes in the beginning with Antonio and Ed constantly breaking them with Giovanni having to guide them on making them but they eventually finished their dishes. First up was the battle of the breakfast crepes and despite Nikkiās confidence, Kanaeās bacon and eggs crepe beat Nikkiās smoked salmon crepe and Kanae said beating Nikki was huge as she usually killed it in challenges. Elizabeth and Giovanni were next up with the lunch crepes and both were praised and awarded a point by Ramsay, and the red team tied up when Vanās scallops and crab crepe beat Antonioās pork crepe which didnāt work at all. Tara and Ed were last up with the desert crepe and Taraās had completely fallen apart while Edās was far too sweet so Ramsay said that neither of them got a point! As the teams were tied, Ramsay said the best crepe would win the challenge and announced that Elizabethās was the nicest to win the challenge for the red team! Elizabeth said this was her best moment in Hells Kitchen ever and Giovanni was fed up of punishments with the blue team only winning 3 challenges all season.
While the red team partied, the blue team knew black jackets were coming up and Ed felt that the team were being too focused on themselves and was worried about service tonight. Ramsay excitedly announced that tonight was French night with a crepe appetiser and some different entrees as well as frogs legs for garnish. Giovanni on appetizers said nothing would be sent back on his station and his risottos and flatbreads came out perfect with Ramsay telling Giovanni it was his time to lead tonight. Antonio on the fish station did not get off to a good start however and served boiled scallops before bouncing back and Antonio said he couldnāt allow any mistakes for the rest of the service. Giovanni continued to have a great service on appetizers and had no issues with the crepes saying this Italian guy can make crepes and the blue team moved onto entrees. Kanae wanted to lead the team on the garnish station but despite Ed getting off to a strong start with perfect wellingtons and duck, Antonio served raw salmon and Ramsay said that Antonio was out of control and needed to get it together. Ed said he was going to drag the team through service but Ed then managed to serve raw fillets which further set the blue team back and Ed couldnāt believe his mistake. Kanae then started to get behind on garnish due to having to redo garnishes and burnt Brussel sprouts with Kanae screaming at Giovanni to not help her but to help Antonio as he was the one sinking the kitchen. Antonio was getting behind on the salmon orders and Giovanni came over to cook salmon for him but also brought it up raw as Antonio angrily took over at basing the salmon but when he took it out the oven, Antonio realised the skin had come off the salmon and asked for an extra 6 minutes. Chef Christina angrily told the blue team to get their shit together but the communication continued to break down as Antonio asked for 2 more minutes on Ed and when 2 minutes were done, Ed served overcooked fillet and Antonioās turbot was raw and Ramsay finally had enough and kicked the whole blue team out! Ed said that service was a joke and Kanae said she felt bad for the salmon and turbot that died only be ruined by Antonio.
The red team wanted to get off to a stronger start but Elizabeth instantly had issues with the crepes despite having the best crepe on the challenge, ruining her first two. Van came over to help out and realised that Elizabethās hands were shaking so he took over the crepes while Elizabeth cooked risotto and flatbreads and Nikkiās first scallops came out well. Elizabeth got her confidence back to take over the crepes but Nikki brought up 2 orders of scallops rather than 3 and after being told by Ramsay to get it together she had her pans too hot and served burnt scallops for the ticket. Ramsay told Nikki to wake up and she did bounce back to get the next scallops out and the red team did finish appetizers. Van on garnish wanted his ladies to get it together for entrees and Ramsay praised Vans leadership which saw Taraās first fillets and chicken fly out as well as Nikkiās turbot. Tara though started to struggle and cut into her wellingtons and realised they were raw and asked for an extra 3 minutes with Van telling Tara she needed to communicate better before Tara fought back. Despite Vanās best efforts the communication continued to break down as Tara got behind on chicken, saying she needed an extra 2 minutes but when Tara brought up her chicken it was RAW and Ramsay said he couldnāt deal with anymore mistakes from the red team. Nikki and Tara did try and communicate but Nikki continued to have problems cooking fish and brought up overcooked turbot to the pass and Tara then brought up duck with burnt skin. Ramsay was apoplectic at this point saying āTHE DUCKāS BURNTā and with the dry turbot he kicked the red team out of the kitchen as well!
The blue team were spent after service and Antonio accepted he should go up but said he was going to fight for his place while saying Kanae should go up with him for overall performance. Kanae was quick to say that Ed had a worse service though and Giovanni agreed that Ed should go up for his mess on steaks but Ed said the blue team wouldnāt be completing service without him. The blue team realised they had to come to a consensus and Antonio finally agreed that Ed should go up with him. The red team were torn as well as everyone decided Tara was the 1st nominee for sinking the meat station but Nikki and Elizabeth voted each other which left Van with a tough decision. Tara was fuming saying that she was actually fighting back until Nikki and Elizabeth fell apart halfway through service but Elizabeth pointed out this was twice in a row on the meat station she had gone down and Van was left with a tough decision, eventually deciding that Elizabeth should go up with Tara for overall worse performance. Ramsay sent Elizabeth and Ed back in line before finally eliminating ANTONIO for his disaster on the fish station but told him to keep his head up. Ed was annoyed at being voted up for 1 bad service but said tomorrow is another day and Elizabeth felt that improving in service seems to mean nothing when people go on past services.
Next episode will have a double elimination as only 5 Chefs will make it into the black jacket lounge.
https://strawpoll.com/polls/6QnMOpzQaZe https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1yZAEyarJoN7y7eVxefqMECZJaQT4frCccvuZ5TdMGvM/edit#gid=0 submitted by
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HellsKitchen [link] [comments]
2023.06.08 09:57 YesahkinDioma Getting rid of a murder of crows without causing them any harm?
Hello crows lovers, I come to you with a problem in the hope you might be of help. Please hold in mind that I do not know much of crows, so this post might contain some wrong assumptions about them.
I recently met a couple who lives on an Irish coast. Three years ago they were delighted to see a couple of crows settling at the top of some of trees. However the murder grew larger and larger and quickly became so loud as to be very difficult to live with: they wake people up at 5am (with earplugs!) and are overwhelming during the day.
The couple would like to get rid of them before they expand too much but it seems very difficult because of how well settled and numerous they are. They counted 40 nests lately. They are also settled very high in the trees.
There are forests and trees that are more isolated nearby where I assume the crows could be happy. But how can we make them move without causing them any harm? When would be the best time of the year to do it, for instance to avoid eggs or babies to be abandoned?
Any idea and advice would be very appreciated.
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2023.06.08 09:56 tony787720 Worried about my appearance..
So apparently, Ive had T2N all my life but it just only recently finally blew up (āofficially awakenedā, according to the diagnosis) this past January when I got the results from my doc after I noticed something very wrong since three months before in October 2022, when I started falling asleep too much during my job as an uber eats driver (eventually had to quit).
Im 40. All my life since before that and even up until February of this year I was very physically active. I did cardio for about 1-2 hours a day 5 days a week. I then started going back to lifting weights.
But with weights, no matter how much I lifted, I would never see any progress.
My whole life Iāve been a massive mercilessy accursed HARD-GAINER. Wether I was at the gym half an hour 5 days a week, 1 hour M-F, 2hrs M-F, 2hrs every other day, 1hr every other day, sticking to a routine, changing up the routine so as to confuse the muscles and therefore build more mass quicker as a result, doing single excercises, doing compound excercises, doing resistance training, doing negatives, doing supersets, focusing on certain parts on different days, doing full-body every other day, wether I ate six times a day mostly meats and eggs and proteins galore with fruits and veggies and nuts and shakes, wether I added supplements to them, wether I took a gallon of creatine daily or just two scoops into my shake after every workout (before post-workout atrophy starts to happen), wether I took pre-workout shakes/drinks or not, wether I withheld from fapping before the gym, wether I slept 7,8,9,10 hours that night or the night before, wether I went during the morning, afternoon or night- on my BEST DAY I would just barely make a difference that barely nobody would ever notice anyway, and it would go away in a heartbeat if I ever stopped lifting for five minutes. Its BAZONKERS people- all that work, and NOTHING to show for it to this day.
Except now the opposite has happened. I have no energy at all to do anything (hell I can barely stay awake as I type this). Cant focus, cant think straight. Even seemingly mundane things like drivig to the grocery store ten minutes away is a daunting task now that worries everyone in my fam to death if I ever would try to do it.
I sleep most of the day. In a 24-hr span, Im awake for about six-seven. I only eat once a day bc of my shitty for life now Keto diet I have to strictly follow so I cant eat 90% of everything so I barely eat and its once/twice a day and its small meals so I dont pass out shortly after. Therefore, I dont eat 6 times a day- nowhere near that. I also had to completely stop working out.
Today, I see myself in the mirror and notice that now that the nightmares and sleep paralysis have progressed, Ive become rail thin. Like, my arms are scary-looking with how thin and bony they are now- they look like those of a 9-year-old boy. Im embarassed to be seen in public. Im paler now, and the Dark Circles under my eyes have grown inmensely darker. I feel like I can charge cars to park in those giant suckers but thats for another story.
So I look like a sickly malnourished skeleton now. Its scary-looking how bad Ive gotten, but gym is the LAST thing I can do nowadays- believe me! I havent gone since Feb when I just had to stop bc I couldnt take it anymore.
So, is rail-thin, bony, extraterrestrial-looking ābodyā normal for people with Severe T2N to get? I look like a sickly shivering starving animal from one of those Sarah McLaughlin commercials with the song playing and everything.
So is this (āfairly newā?) appearance normal for people with N to display? Remember that mineās severe t2. Severe.
Thanks!
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2023.06.08 09:52 peelymode Holy Shit
2023.06.08 09:38 DementedCreus My (22m) GF (22f) has anxiety attacks almost daily and I now feel useless
TL.DR. at the end...
Pretty much what the title says. My gf has had anxiety and depression for years. We met last year through a mutual best friend "K" (21f), between August and September, and we hit it off as friends.
A few weeks later, I told K that I might be developing fellings for this girl but wasn't sure yet and would not try anything before being completely positive about it. She then suggested that I gorget about it for a while, since this girl was not in a very stable position, mentally speaking.
We get to february and I finally managed to get out of my ex's claws (she managed to rope me back in for a few months before I finally broke free). It should be noted that before and after the deal with my ex, I was completely sane and ready for a relationship (at least that's what I was told by my therapist).
Back to february and I told K that I liked this girl and was sure of it, we had become good friends and I was certain I felt that way and that she felt the same. K told me to go for it, so I went. I told my GF I liked her, I had liked her for some time and wanted us to date.
At first she was confused because she had had toxic relationships previously and was surrounded by false rumors (by the way I despise those), thinking nobody would have feelings for her. She told me she needed to talk about it. I agreed and waited patiently for her answer. She came back saying she felt something but wasn't sure what it was, but was willing to find out.
We dated for a month and a half and she managed to confirm that she did feel the same for me as I did for her, so I waited a couple kore days and proposed to her, so it became official.
While we were dating, and after we became an official couple, she'd have these anxiety attacks on our nightly facetime. They'd last a month on every single night, then be good for a week, and then back at it for another month. I tried to help her as best as I could by reassuring her, letting her know I was there and anything to try to calm her down.
Overtime, it became more difficult, she would no longer answer me and would start hitting herself on her thighs, getting bruises high enough her leg so that her skirts (she likes to wear them) would hide the marks. I died inside whenever I heard her doing it (she would turn off her camera but not her microphone).
She then told me she wanted me to listen, but because she did it in order to receive attention (she gets the worst end of the deal when it comes to her family and "friends"( they started the rumors based on a case of sexual harassment she suffered during the pandemic by someone we both know)). She did it so much she started doing it out of pure reflex, but I managed to convince her to stop.
She stopped hitting herself for a while when she found out I used to do it in private whenever I experienced my own anxiety attacks in the past and also when I told her it made me feel desperate and useless since I could do nothing to stop her whilst being over the phone.
This got her worse because she blamed herself for everything (this is important since she does it a lot over pretty much anything), but stopped punching herself. The first month of anxiety passed and we had a rather pepaceful week, then it came again.
We had a fre misunderstandings over silly things and she started doing something I always hated but never had the guts to say it since I fear I'll make it worse: she stated that every bad thing that happened to her was not important because she deserved it.
Now I don't know about you, but I am the kind of person who believes that nobody deserves to have bad things happening to them. May them be as small as scratching your arm against rose thorns or as big as mentally or physically suffering any sort of abuse.
She, however, is way down that hole and doesn't seem to get out, she says she'll do the work, but I just keep seeing her get worse and worse. Her family does the opposite of help (she gets treated like the black sheep even though she's done nothing wrong) and her classmates and project classmates pretty much force her to do all the work.
Between that and her job, she can't get a break from all the emotional trouble and breaks down every single time. I can't even have a normal conversation for more than five mintues because she starts berating herself and hurting herself again. She now digs her nails into her skin and pulls her hair (at least that's all I've been able to see, cause she might still punch herself without me knowing).
I have tried everything but she always goes back to thinking she's a failure despite everything she's accomplished.
She stops breathing, she feels like she's choking, she ends up telling me I deserve better and that it'd be easier if she just died, to which I counter with "and what about me?" Which gives me "you can get someone better than me because I am a waste of resources" and I am so tired and desperate of hearing that.
She knows I tried to end it myself last year by almost jumping of a building and falling on a piked fence. I did not go through with it by some miracle because I decided I was NOT going out that way and that whenever the time came, I would leave on my own terms.
She tried to do the same on a pedestrian bridge that overlooked a busy avenue but said she was to much of a coward to go through with it because she suddenly feared death. I told her at the moment that fearing death was everything but coward, and I stand by it.
I have a great deal of respect to people who did not go through with it and even towards people who, sadly, did. It is not easy to get yourself out of taking that last step or moving the arm or fingers and swallow one last time.
Whenever she has these situations she apologizes, stating she says a lot of things she doesn't mean, but I'm not sure anymore and it makes my heart break.
Last week I could not take it anymore, it was finals week and I had been studying as much as I could. I was also needed at home a lot to take care of repairs and stuff, so I had to cancel a few times we would be seeing each other. She confronted me about it, saying she felt disappointed, alone, worthless and a failure.
Then I snapped.
I snapped in a different manner than what you may think. I apologized, and didn't even explain. I apologized profusely about making her feel like that and that if she didn't want to talk to me anymore and end things, then I would understand completely and would not get angry or mad at all.
To be honest, it is kind of difficult for me to go out, even if it's just with friends. My family's economic situation is not great (my father stole from us before he ran away, died and left us with massive debts to cover, along with school debts) and everytime I want to go out, the first answer is always "we have no money, you will not go out".
After I said what I said while my first mental breakdown in months. She got worse. Open mouth, insert foot.
We talked it out, thought we'd progressed, but she's brought it up again a few times during her anxiety attacks.
This leads us to today.
One of her friends (it was NOT K) had an anxiety attack of her own and we went to help her. Said friend passed out in her arms (nobody saw it coming) and we rushed her to the infirmary. My GF had to go take an exam and I walked her to it. While on the way, she started having one herself, as she thought of herself as the worst friend ever because she had to go to the exam.
I tried comforting her as best as I could, but I had to skeddadle back home on the bus route and was running out of time. She had an anxiety attack about the same thing during the exam, told me about it and I couls only sit in the bus feeling miserable and useless.
I got home, she then got picked up by her parents and got home, we started talking and something insignificant on one of her school chats triggered another anxiety attack and she stopped breathing. This went on for a couple of hours. I'd try to stabilize her and not two minutes after she'd get it again.
She finally mamaged to sleep, but I am in dire need of any kind of help. I feel useless, desperate, ignored, fed up, worthless. I feel like I'm not enough because she told me she felt alone in this world and it just broke my heart. But everytime I tell her that I was sorry she felt that way or anything else to try to comfort her, she replies it's not my fault, that she's the one with the problem and that's it. But she keeps falling into the same things and repeats them over and over again for hours.
I don't know what else to do.
For those who read the entire thing, thank you.
TL.DR.: My GF's anxiety attacks have gotten worse and I feel useless and worthless because of it.
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2023.06.08 09:31 sciencep1e Sentinel Ship or Living Ship
Hey folks, I've been running an S class sentinel ship for ages now, best ship I've ever had and I love it. I started the Living Ship questline what feels like 10 years ago now. Having finally acquired my ship I see that all the upgrades now need work like hatching eggs and stuff. Which brings me to my question, will it be an improvement on the sentinel when done or should I just stick with that and how much work would it take to get it to similar stats like +1.5k jump distance. Thanks in advance
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sciencep1e to
NoMansSkyTheGame [link] [comments]
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2023.06.08 09:08 Sea-Phase-7999 Best Retirement Plans In India 2023
Retirement Plan Retirement is an exciting phase of life that allows you to enjoy the fruits of your labor and pursue your passions. However, to make the most of your golden years, it's crucial to plan ahead. Retirement planning helps ensure financial stability, enabling you to lead a comfortable and fulfilling life. In this blog post, we will explore some essential tips for effective retirement planning.
Start Early: One of the most critical factors in retirement planning is time. The earlier you start saving and investing for retirement, the better. Time allows your investments to grow through compounding, making a significant difference in the long run. Begin by determining your retirement goals, estimating your expenses, and creating a budget that includes regular contributions to retirement accounts.
Assess your Financial Health: Before diving into retirement planning, assess your current financial situation. Evaluate your assets, debts, and income sources. Calculate your net worth and determine your monthly cash flow. Understanding your financial health will help you make informed decisions and set realistic retirement goals.
Set Clear Retirement Goals: Define your retirement goals to give your planning process direction. Consider the lifestyle you desire during retirement, travel plans, healthcare needs, and any specific hobbies or activities you wish to pursue. Setting clear goals will help you determine the amount of money you need to save and guide your investment strategy.
Estimate Retirement Expenses: To plan effectively, estimate your retirement expenses. Consider factors such as housing, healthcare costs, daily living expenses, leisure activities, and unexpected emergencies. Analyze your current spending patterns to get a rough estimate. It's better to overestimate your expenses to ensure you have enough funds to cover any unforeseen circumstances.
Save Consistently: Make saving for retirement a priority. Set up automatic contributions to retirement accounts, such as a 401(k), IRA, or pension plan. Contribute the maximum amount allowed, or at least aim to contribute enough to receive any employer matching contributions. Consistent saving, even small amounts, can add up significantly over time.
Diversify your Investments: Diversification is key to managing risk and maximizing returns. Avoid putting all your eggs in one basket by investing in a mix of assets such as stocks, bonds, real estate, and mutual funds. Diversifying your investment portfolio reduces the impact of market volatility and provides stability and growth opportunities.
Consider Professional Advice: If you're unsure about managing your retirement planning alone, consider seeking professional advice. Financial advisors can help you analyze your goals, create a personalized retirement plan, and guide you through investment decisions. They have the expertise to optimize your portfolio and ensure you stay on track to meet your retirement goals.
Stay Informed and Adjust: Retirement planning is an ongoing process. Stay updated with changing economic conditions, tax laws, and investment opportunities. Periodically review your retirement plan and make adjustments as necessary. Life events, such as marriage, children, or health issues, may require revisions to your goals and financial strategy.
Conclusion: Retirement planning is a vital step toward securing your financial future and enjoying a comfortable retirement. By starting early, setting clear goals, saving consistently, diversifying investments, and staying informed, you can make your retirement years truly rewarding. Remember, a well-executed retirement plan brings peace of mind, enabling you to live the life you've always dreamed of during your golden years.
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2023.06.08 09:07 aishajanahi Here's some recommendations for meals/products
Hello friends! I've been lurking here since I failed my 1 hour screen last week at 158. This community made me feel so much better about my result! thank you all! I see there's a lot of posts about food recommendation requests. I've been "mindful of my carbs" for the last 6 years, so I have developed an arsenal of good low carb food options. I'll list a few below. Unfortunately many may be specific to the US. Also, luckily my 3 hour test came back all normal and I haven't had to monitor my glucose at home, so i don't speak from GD experience.
These are all things I'm able to find at my local grocery stores (harris teeter and giant)
[Bread] Hotdog buns, burger buns, bagels and slice bread: 647 brand from Schmidt/old time has so much fiber and half the amount of net carbs of regular breads. No one can tell this is "lower carb" bread.
Flat bread and "lavash": Joseph bread has a flax and oat barn line that's VERY good. Again, no one can tell it's lower carb.
Tortillas: so many companies make low carb tortillas, they're generally all good. I prefer Ole extreme.
[Pasta] Al Dente has a line called Carba-nada. It has been a go to. It's the closest to regular pasta with a little more character and half the carbs and double the fiber.
Bonza has chickpea pasta that is 30 grams net carbs per serving. It's a little more squishy than regular pasta, but I like it quite a lot. They have ready mac and cheese boxes with decent macros if you restrict yourself to a single serving!
Explore Cuisine has different types of bean pastas. I like all of them! They all have a mild but distinct taste that can be a hit or miss depending on the dish. They're all VERY good on their own with some light sauce or garlic olive oil. They're very heavy on the protein so I often prefer them with no meat.
[Savory snacks] Beef/jerkey sticks (look at macros)
Olives! Several brands make "liquid free" snacking olives. My favorite is Mario
P3 protein snacks
Popcorn if you can not finished whole bag
Flavored almonds. Blue Diamond has a wide variety of non-boring almonds.
Any snacking cheese in individual packs (string, cheddar sticks, baby Belle.. so many!)
Quest protein chips have only 3 grams net carbs
[Sweet treats] NICK'S products. Ice crams and bars and other stuff too. I LOOoRRRVVVEE their peanut chocolate protein bar, it's basically a snickers bar but not as sweet. It's the very best!
Berries with reddit wip
KIND ice cream bars have decent macros!
Halo top ice cream (NOT the whole pint, and not the sorbet)
Skinny Dipped almonds. Espresso and lemon are my favorite!
Lily's chocolate
[Sugar alternatives] I'm a firm believer in diversity and moderation. I believe that having huge amounts of any type of sugar on the regular is not great. So I personally try to mix them up (including having regular sugar in moderation). But here's my two cents.
Monk fruit sugar: most similar to regular sugar. By far my favorite. People can't tell the difference between it and regular sugar. Generally haven't noticed any bad gut effects.
Allulose: not as sweet as sugar. Still good. 85% similar to regular sugar in taste.
Stevia: definitely has a weird aftertaste. Not my favorite but has its uses and great mixed with other sugars or fruit-heavy desserts.
Swerve: pretty alright. It's an erythritol mix which makes me bloated if I consume a lot of it. I use it frequently in small amounts or mixed with other sugars!
Xylitol: has a minty cooling effect. I only like it in icecream and gum. May cause bloating too.
Sucralose: there's been many studies showing its not the best for you. I DON'T avoid it like the plague, but would personally rather have regular sugar over sucralose.
[Quick meals/sides/lunches/snacks] Boca burgers (with 647 buns, mayo cheese and sugar free ketchup!) Just pop them in the microwave for 1:30 mins!
Cherry tomatos + fresh mozzarella + olive oil and balsamic + basil
Cucumber + cream cheese + everything seasoning
Trader joes crisp bread crackers + smoked salmon + cream cheese
[Breakfast, other than the obvious, EGGS <3] Pancakes and waffles, there's SO many brands that make low carb options. Our store has Birch Benders and it's pretty alright!
Avocado + hemp seeds + seasoning + lime (or even a splash of apple cider vinegar)
647 brand toast with a slice of cheddar cheese!
Cottage cheese (even the fruity ones are very low carb)
Cheese platter, sugar free jelly and sugar free peanut butter and crackers/low carb bread
[General cooking advice] If you can, join a service that delivers vegitables to you weekly. This will force you to cook at home and not let things go to waste and eat A LOT more vegetables.
A spiralizer is fun! Veggies are not a substitute for noodles, but they often work well in many dishes!
Cooking shredded cabbage in a very hot wok with soy sauce and garlic is a great base for Asian dishes. A regular pan would steam the cabbage, so it's not as good.
Spaghetti squash is your friend. You can poke holes in it and microwave it whole.
Air frier is another one of your best friends. They speed things up tremendously making it more likely for you to eat at home!
Cooking LOTS of tomatoes + garlic + onion + Italian seasoning + dump any other vegitable and protein you have available until the tomatoes really reduce, will ALWAYS result in a yummy meal. Topped with feta and pine nuts and olive oil? Yes please. Low carb bread works with this.
Any vegitable combination + any ground or shredded protein + a can of salsa + Mexican seasoning + (beans optional, they add fiber, protein and substance but also add carbs) make an excellent meal on its own OR in a low carb tortilla. Avocado and sour cream work on the side.
Salads with a hot protein on top feel more like a meal than an all cold salad. They're less boring too.
I hope this was useful, even little!
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2023.06.08 08:54 LongjumpingSugarr Is it unethical to stay in a marriage for benefits, even if you donāt love them
My marriage to my husband gives me tremendous benefits. We live in a nice apartment, I have health insurance, I get to stay home with my kids, and we also have extra spending money for good food and fun things. We are trying to buy a house next year. Also, the sex is pretty good.
My issue is that I try to have very good morals. I do not feel much love for my husband anymore. Although he is a good father, he has treated me very badly in the past. Some things I have not been able to get over. I have had to emotionally detach myself due to this. I feel bad but he doesnāt seem to mind. In fact we get along much better. The whole house seems to be happier when I pretty much just let my husband be and expect nothing. I have brought up divorce in the past and he will be ok with it, enthusiastic even, and then will always resort to begging for me back when I actually start to leave. I always stay because of the benefits of marriage.
I am at a point where my kids and I genuinely have a great life and I just want what is best for them. Being in love isnāt a necessity for me anymore. However, I do feel unethical. My husband is still a person and he could maybe find someone that he could be more in love with. I donāt think he wants that though. I think he wants me, but just as a trophy wife. I do take very good care of my appearance and he seems content. As long as I please him and stay faithful to him he pretty much gives me whatever I want. I used to be so in love with him and itās taken me a long time to get to the point that I can detach myself enough to survive this environment. I feel much better. I tried for so long to be āin loveā but he is just very set in his selfish ways. I just still feel so guilty because I kind of feel like At this point Iām just using him for his money and benefits.
Im looking for someone to tell me itās ok and that as long as I donāt cheat and I take care of him and sexually please him, I donāt have to love him. I very much believe in karma and I donāt want to have to repay this karmic debt of betrayal in my next life.
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2023.06.08 08:48 MalleableBee1 Confession: Idk what a good bullpen is šš
I've watched this team religiously for the past 6 years or so and everyone says our bullpen sucks eggs.
What constitutes a good bullpen? Are we talking 0 runs or maybe 1 or 2 over a 4 inning stretch?
Who has the best bullpen in the league?
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2023.06.08 08:46 MummyCroc I am a government employee in Zimbabwe and I turned 34 this week (TW: Mentions of suicide)
Occupation ā Government employee
Age ā 34
Location ā Zimbabwe
My salary ā $500 (paid monthly)
Side Gig Income ā $0
Other income ā negligible amounts from dividends received from my stock portfolio that I re-invest
Housemates ā 4 (husband P, 6 year old L, 4 year old E and nanny F. My nephew M is around and makes appearances too)
Assets and Liabilities
Equity | $60,000 fully paid off | |
Retirement Balance | ?? | I contribute monthly, and employer matches fully. But because of changes in currency and hyperinflation, I donāt really count this as an asset |
Savings | $1700 | (went down due to travelling trying to get my passport done since it expired) |
Current account balance | $660 | Includes my mum's money since I'm managing her financial affairs while she's abroad |
Loan from employer | $130 | I took a personal loan from work, because the interest rates are lower than rate of inflation and repayment is over 18 months. Loan was used to make improvements on our house, and what wasnāt used, I bought shares on our stock exchange, due to hyperinflation, the amount I owe in US$ has gone down |
Investments (shares in various counters on our local stock exchanges) | $1,186 | |
Car | $4,000 | Based on current resale value. Car was bought secondhand for cash |
Income progression- (
https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/vbbb7s/i_live_in_zimbabwe_making_3600year_and_i_just/)
Expenses This year, my husband and I decided that he would take on the bulk of our expenses since I do most of the domestic work/childcare. Expenses I pay will be indicated. My salary is now for my expenses, my investments and my savings, and spoiling the kids. Husband caters for the family basics. There was a point last year when I felt my husband wasnāt as invested in the family because he barely did anything financially. By having him cater for all expenses, he is now definitely involved and invested. My husbandās income is just about the same as mine, slightly higher at some times.
My Expenses Expense | Amount /period | Note |
Car insurance and licensing | $300/annum | This is due in March, and I pay for the entire year |
Petrol | $60/month | |
Electricity | $10/month | |
Airtime/data | $20/month | |
Groceries | $60/month | This is for additional groceries such as bread, veg and fruit bought during the month |
Kidsā clothes | $40/month | Iām trying to build up their winter wardrobe so I try to buy them something each month |
Makeup/clothes/toiletries/ supplements/hair | $30/month | I do not us this much monthly though |
Water | $15/month | Based on last bill received in April. We do not get water consistently so bills are infrequent |
Donations | $20/month | Ad hoc donations to a soup kitchen, and maternal health fun |
Stock market investment | $50/month | May invest more or less, but I do try to buy shares every payday |
Household Expenses (paid by P)
Expense | Amount /period | Note |
Groceries | $200/month | Bulk grocery shopping of staple food items and toiletries |
LP Gas | $30/approx. every 2 months | We buy when it runs out. Usually every 2 months depending on how bad the power supply is |
Medical | $15/month | For OTC meds (painkiller, cough syrup, antacid stocked for emergencies) and any prescriptions |
Pet expenses | $60/ twice a year | For vaccinations and checkups for 4 dogs. Pet food is covered under groceries |
School fees for the kids | $347/ term | One kid has fees paid every month, the other every 3 months |
Nanny | $80/month | Less than before as both kids are now in school fulltime, and nanny is there to get them ready for school and care after school for 3 hours. |
DSTV subscription | $37/month | |
Transport for kids to/from school | $60/month | L gets picked up and dropped off at home daily, E is dropped off after school |
Previous MDs - (
https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/vbbb7s/i_live_in_zimbabwe_making_3600year_and_i_just/) and (
https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/yc801g/i_am_33_years_old_and_i_just_graduated_with_my/)
MD Q&A Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it? Yes, I have a BSc in Accounting, a Masters in Accounting, and a Postgraduate Diploma in Taxation. My parents both have Masters degrees, and in my family, the bare minimum acceptable for education was getting a Bachelors. My mother paid for my undergraduate degree, and I paid cash for my postgraduate studies.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? My parents divorced when I was very young. My dad is the wealthier of the two, my mum has always been middle-class. My mum brought me up with very little financial help from my dad, he only covered tuition and healthcare until I turned 18. My mum catered for everything else. My mum taught me how to look for bargains, how to save and invest, and also how to sometimes enjoy your money.
If you have, when did you move out of your parents'/guardians' house? I would say I moved out at 26 when I got my current job. I had moved out when I got my first fulltime job, but moved back home when that contract ended
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life? At 26 again. That's when I earned enough to cover all my bills without needing help. My husband P covers some aspects of my financial life, and my mum occasionally helps out with stuff for her grandchildren.
What was your first job and why did you get it? I worked as a receptionist at my mum's law firm after finishing my A Levels (age 18) while waiting to start university. My mum gave me the job to keep me occupied and out of mischief, lol.
Do you worry about money now? I worry about building generational wealth for my children. I want to make sure they will be set for life as adults. I do worry about money because hyperinflation is eroding my earnings and retirement dramatically. This is my second time losing my retirement. My mum and in laws are losing their retirement for the third time, so honestly our old age looks bleak if we do not invest outside of work pensions.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? I receive negligible dividends from the shares I own, lol.
Day 1 0430 ā Iām woken up by loadshedding. I sigh, rollover, and sleep some more
0600 ā Alarm goes off. I turn it off, enjoy cuddles from P and finally get out of bed. Our water tanks ran out 4 days ago, and council has not yet deigned to give us water, so we rely on Pās parents and friends to give us water. I get my water that was warming up on the stove, and take a quick bucket bath. I moisturize, do my brows, throw my lace wig on (I cut my hair in January, and Iām at a really awkward stage where my hair looks bad when I wear it out all day) and get dressed. Itās cold in the mornings so I put on winter stockings and a black and white chevron patterned dress, nude ballet pumps plus my warm jacket. I get E from the couch where he was watching Cocomelon and my lunch bag out of the kitchen and we head off to his school. After dropping off E, I go to the office. No electricity means no elevator, so I go up the stairs. I see my bossās boss and greet him as we do the ZESA (local electricity company) sponsored workout. I log in to the work register, fill up my kettle, and settle down to check out my work email. Nothing urgent came through overnight, so I go into my personal email. The wig company I patronize has given me a code for my birthday, and Iām wondering if I should pull the trigger on my cart. I decide to do a report while thinking this through.
My mum is currently working out of the country, so I am managing her local finances/obligations while sheās away. I remember I have to buy the prepaid electricity token for my childhood home as well as for the house she lives in when sheās working in the country.
I spend $23 on electricity for both houses (mumās money so doesnāt count) 1030 ā After doing some firefighting and office gossip I have my breakfast. Today its rice, peas and 2 fried eggs. I sprinkle some peri-peri Aromat on top since I donāt have a sauce/gravy ad I have been craving spicy food lately. I also pop my multivitamin and supplements. I check my teamās work and send back anything that needs correcting. I also generate the multiple reports my boss expects from me. I suddenly remember I need to claim my allowance for performing a role that is higher than my actual position at work. I quickly complete the form, and send it to my boss for his signature. The extra money from this is what I use to fund my stock market investments. I also remind my team to send a report to me for consolidation by noon.
12.00 ā I do a major push of all my work due today so I can relax after lunch. I compile my reports and set them ready to send. I also finish my first 2 litres of water of the day, and cue up the next 2 litres
1300 ā Its lunchtime, and my work bestie and I head out around town**. I find shorts that L would fit and buy 2 pairs for $10**. We head back to the office and I have caramel popcorn for lunch. Then I remember I forgot to have my afternoon meds, oops. Anyway, more work before heading to an audit meeting
1630 ā The audit meeting is finally over, and I rush to shut down my computer, pack up my things and go home. I have an agreement with my manager that as long as I make up for the hour, by either coming early or skipping lunch, I can leave work at 4pm. I had a total hysterectomy end of last year so I still canāt manage driving in heavy traffic. I arrive home, make the bed (P had not made it when he went to work), and harvest chilies from our garden that have ripened. I also harvest a local herb used as a flu remedy and lemongrass, so I can brew up a tea/tisane for the flu affected people in my house. I also pack Lās lunch for tomorrow, a pie, a naartjie and juice.
Itās also Fās payday, so I give her US$80 (P gave me this money). E says he is hungry so I feed him sadza and sour milk by his request. I multitask covering Lās school textbook while supervising his homework and watching Married to Real Estate and the Great British Bake Off. I then have my dinner of sadza, greens and beef. I have a chat with the kids about their day at school. P gets home.
1900 ā P and my nephew M go to fetch water from Pās friendās house. The city council still hasnāt opened up our water supply. I do some French on Duolingo while the boys wreak havoc in their playroom. I read L and E their bedtime stories and put them to bed. I decide to do my hair in cornrows while watching Masterchef Australia. They get home and I help them carry water indoors. I remember that when power comes back I need to boil tripe on the stove, so I cut it up, put it in the pot with water, salt and garlic, and place it on the electric stove. We have serious loadshedding these days, so we have a gas stove and solar power to tide us over. I take a quick bath and change into my pyjamas. While P watches TV, I read Wild Sweet Love by Beverly Jenkins and continue to do my hair in cornrows.
2200 ā My arms are tired and Iām only halfway through with the cornrows. I give up and go to bed with P.
Total spent - $10
Day 2 0600 ā I hear crying. E is in a bad mood today. I turn off my alarm, and go to see whatās wrong. E does not want to get dressed for school. I sigh, and help F dress him while he throws a massive tantrum. E is dressed, so I go do my morning routine of shower, moisturize, contact lenses, and eyebrow makeup. Today, I wear a green dress I took from my mum, black tights, nude ballet flats and a black and white coat. E gets put into the car by F, and starts crying for porridge. We are already late, so he learns that the consequence of refusing to eat his porridge on time is to go to school without having his porridge. Itās not a big issue though, as he gets fed at school. So I lock the doors and windows and drive him to school as he throws a tantrum for the entire 10 minute drive. I shove him into the school gate and head to work.
Itās another ZESA sponsored stair workout today. I log into the register, and fill up my kettle with water. I switch on my computer, check my work email and send off client emails to my team for their response. My personal email has an annual report from one of the companies I have shares in so I check out if thereās a dividend this year. I own a negligible number of shares in the company though, but 28c per share is quite impressive. I check to see if my stock exchange wallet has been credited with the money I transferred there so I can buy more shares. It still hasnāt so I send a follow up email o the enquiries desk at the stock exchange. I do have a stockbroker, but I prefer doing my trades myself. I also do some French on Duolingo before 8am.
0830 ā Our HR is in a tizzy because people are late for work. I donāt make a big deal out of it usually, because salaries are shit and people are demotivated. As long as my team shows up and does some work, Iām ok. I approve some work, and warn my team about coming in a bit too late. I also tell a teammate that she will have to cover for me on Monday as I am taking the day off. Our internet connectivity is shit so I canāt log into our system to check some stuff. My work bestie gives me avocados from her house. I almost cry because I have been craving avocados, but been too cheap to buy them.
1000 ā I have a really bad sore throat. I am also hungry since I havenāt had breakfast yet. I jot down my shopping list for the weekend and head to Pick ānā Pay to buy carrots, green peppers, tomatoes, lemons, cheese, polony and bread. I also buy my breakfast/lunch, which is rice, beans, ox liver and egg salad**. It all cost $10**. I leave my shopping in my car, and go to the office to wolf down my food, and take my multivitamin and painkiller. I also receive my wigs that I bought in May. Perfect timing, as I want to wear a new wig tomorrow for our girlsā day out.
I do some more work, and remind my team to send me the information I need for my daily reports.
1300 ā I go out to buy a few items I didnāt find in Pick ānā Pay earlier**. I go to Spar and buy peas, eggs, soft drinks for the outing tomorrow and a sausage roll. Total cost is $10**. The outing has been deemed kid friendly, so I needed drinks for the boys to have tomorrow. I get back into the office, and spend the rest of the lunch hour working.
1600 ā Itās finally time to go home. I send my email to handover work issues for the person who will take over my role on Monday while I am on leave. I also send my out of office email, and head home. The kids are at their grandmotherās, so I take a leisurely bath, put on my pyjamas and eat dinner. Then I watch Masterchef Australia until P and E get home. I also get in some French Duolingo practice
2000 ā P goes out with his friends, so I snuggle up on the couch with E and watch TV. I put E to bed, read him his bedtime story and kiss him good night. I finally finish season 13 of Masterchef Australia, and move on to My Kitchen Rules Australia. I love Australian reality shows, ngl.
2200 ā I go to bed P gets home and tells me some bad news about a friend of ours. I feel very sad for him. He cuddles me and we sleep.
Total spent - $20
Day 3 0700 ā I wake up feeling like a truck ran me over. I get out of bed, and get ready to hand-wash our laundry. We still have no running water so we canāt use the washing machine. I play music while doing my laundry to keep me motivated
0900 ā Laundry has been hung out to dry. F has cooked potato curry, so I boil eggs and water. I have my breakfast of potato curry, egg, multivitamin and coffee. Once Iām done, I give E a bath and dress him. I also bath, moisturize, do my brows and get dressed. Iām wearing jeans and a t-shirt today as my friends and I ae supposed to take our kids out for a playdate. Then I receive a message that the outing is cancelled since one of our group is really sick. I try to think of something I can do with E, since L is out having fun with his grandmother. I do my Swahili Duolingo practice.
1100 ā The welder comes to do some work on our garage door. I monitor the work for a bit, and then my nephew takes over. E starts really bugging me to go out. So I put on my headband wig and sneakers, and pack a cooler bag with snacks and drinks. We head into town and
I buy myself some ciders for $9. These are for me to drink when the mood strikes me. E wants to go to a resort by the lake so I oblige him.
We pay $8 for our entrance. He goes to play on the swings, and I take pictures of him having fun. Another family turns up, and one of his classmates is among them. Heās so happy, and goes to play with his friend. I watch him running around.
1500 ā I get a call from my friend that sheās in town with my cake. This cake was meant for the cancelled outing. I pack up our stuff, hustle E into the car and drive back into town. I let out some colourful swear words when I realise
I forgot to get our change of $2. Anyway**, I meet up with my friend and get the cake, and pay her $30**. Itās so pretty. I call my MIL while still in town to find out what time she will be there so I can pick up L. She says it will be an hour, so E and I head home to drop off the cake so it doesnāt melt in my AC-less car.
1600 ā We are back in town waiting for L and MIL.
E wants an ice cream so I buy him one for $0.50 using money I had in my Innbucks wallet. MIL calls and asks me to head over to where she is to pick L up since she canāt leave yet. E and I get there. MIL gets me sadza and goat tripe stew, which I eat a bit of to be polite even though I am not hungry. When Iām done, I pack up the kids and drive home. I bath and change into my pyjamas.
1800 ā I feed the kids, and we play until their weekend bedtime of 8pm. I read them their bedtime stories and tuck them in. I watch TV and iron my morning laundry while having a gin and juice until 9pm, and head to read in bed. P and my nephew arrive home from their amateur soccer league match and subsequent outing with the boys. I fall asleep soon after.
Total spent - $49.50
Day 4 0700 ā Iām woken up by L demanding that I come and play with them. I am still sleepy so I fob him off.
0900 - F knocks on the door and tells us she is off to church. I finally get out of bed and get dressed. I see the boys playing relatively peacefully so I let them continue with their antics. In the kitchen, I find F had cooked breakfast, and since Iām starving, I heat up water for coffee. L surprisingly isnāt hungry so I serve up breakfast for P and me. I have my daily multivitamin. P heads out to go fetch water, while I bath, change and hang out with the kids. I also do my French Duolingo practice for the day
1200 ā I have played with the dogs and kids, and I am exhausted. I collapse onto the couch and watch MKR Australia. P gets home, and naps on the couch. I give the kids haircuts and baths.
1700 ā L is hungry and really wants cake, so I feed the kids a dinner of sadza and sour milk. Then some cake for dessert. I also pack Lās school lunch, which will be a polony sandwich, a cupcake and juice. The kids play until its bedtime at 7pm. The usual routine, bedtime stories and tuck in is done
2000 ā P and I watch a movie while having some alcoholic drinks.
2200 ā Bedtime for us
Total spent - $0
Day 5 0600 ā Itās my birthday today. I am going all out celebrating myself since TW
I tried unaliving myself twice in the past year. L wishes me a happy birthday before he goes to school. I get birthday messages from my mum, dad, SILs, and friends. I also get a call from my brother, his wife and their son, and they sing to me. I feel very loved today. P goes to drop off E at school today so I can sleep in
0800 ā I am finally up and hungry. I cook a quick breakfast of boiled eggs, and a bean curry. P takes my car to get serviced, while I bath, moisturize, contact lenses, do a full face of makeup and get dressed for the day. Today I wear a tie-dyed cutout mini-dress and sneakers, and my wavy headband wig
1300 ā P is home and he drives me to a hotel outside town near a renowned tourist site in our country. We have a platter of fried fish, chicken strips, pork strips, fries, and a salad to share and multiple Savannah Drys while there. Itās really nice getting to reconnect after a very tumultuous year in our marriage. P pays.
1700 ā We drive around the area, before heading home. Once we get home, P and my nephew go on a hunt for water, while I feed the kids. P and I head off to take our showers. I remember why I donāt do a full face of makeup when it take a long time to get the makeup off my face.
1900 ā The family sings happy birthday, and we eat cake. Birthday gifts were gin and chocolate. I hustle the boys off to bed. No story today, as they went to bed later than usual. P watches TV while I read my novel.
2100 ā Bedtime for the grownups
Total spent - $0
Day 6 0530 ā I wake up and lie in bed for a bit. Then I read my novel some more.
0620 ā I am up, and take my bath, moisturize, do my brows and get dressed. Itās cold this morning, so I wear a yellow dress with black polka dots, black tights and ankle boots. I pack up the cake Iām giving to my colleagues, as well as my water bottle. E and I head out. I drop E off at school, and go to the office. I log into the work register, turn on my computer, and check my emails. There are a few pressing issues I need to get up to speed with. One of my colleagues gives me $50 as a birthday gift. I also hand out the cake to my team.
0900 ā Work is pretty quiet today, so I update my MD. I also receive news that one of my nephews is getting married. He is not that much younger than me, and could be my younger brother, but it makes me feel so old.
Note on my family: In our culture, even distant relatives are given close relationships so the large number of nephews/nieces is from those relationships. Itās a big thing done to maintain close family bonds. I have 4 actual (in a Western sense) nephews and nieces who are all under the age of 6.
1000 ā
I head to the supermarket and buy bread, onions, carrots, pork chops, pork trotters and my breakfast and lunch. This costs $25. The meat is the main cost driver here. I have a sausage roll, my multivitamin, supplement and milk for breakfast. I remember that I need to check if my stock exchange wallet was credited, ugh. The website is refusing to load and Iām very frustrated. I finally log in and see the amount is still not credited. I email and send a tweet to the stock exchange. Hopefully the tweet will get them to start moving.
1200 ā My boss is mad. One member of my team left his desk without informing me and thereās an urgent matter. I was about to go downstairs to give P the groceries, so I stick around for a bit before committing the same offence as my subordinate, lol. I quickly get back into my office and check on work, sign some papers and letters, and clear out my emails.
1300 ā My work bestie has to run other errands at lunch so I decide to stay in the office. I check my personal email and see I have received a dividend of $0.27, lol. The share price will probably drop soon, so I will buy more shares in this counter if I can get them to increase my shareholding. My goal for this year is to breach the 10,000 share mark for one counter. I suddenly remember I have work to do, so I use my lunch hour to do the work, and then take a quick break to eat my lunch of fries and a sausage and do some Swahili Duolingo practice.
1500 ā I am thinking of going home when one of my team members calls me to deal with an angry client. I go to the office, and find out itās a surprise birthday party from my team. I am so happy, lol. We have more cake, and thereās also fruit and juice. I head home feeling so appreciated with even more cake.
1700 ā P and my nephew go out to get water. I warm up my bath water, and give the kids their dinner. Today its rice and croc meat. I make Lās lunch for tomorrow, a toasted polony sandwich and juice. I also pack my lunch, rice, a fried egg and peas. And some cake for my work bestieās kids. I take my bath; change into my pyjamas and hound E to eat his food. If we let that kid be, he would probably live on the bits of our souls he sucks out daily by being stubborn. I am feeling nauseous so I have plain rice with a bit of avocado. The kids watch cartoons, while I do some more Swahili on Duolingo.
1900 ā Bedtime for the kids. Today, thereās no demand for a bedtime story, so I just tuck them in and tell them I love them. I read my novel as increasingly feel more nauseated. I end up going to hurl my guts out. P comes home and finds me lying limply on the bed. He gives me a cuddle, and goes to eat his dinner. I get up but smell fish, and run back to throw up. If I hadnāt had a hysterectomy, I would be doing a pregnancy test ASAP.
2100 ā I go to bed, and lie in bed for a bit, before finally drifting off.
Total spent - $25
Day 7 0500 ā I wake up feeling nauseated again. Ugh, this reminds me of having hyperemesis while pregnant. I put my water on to heat and get back in bed to read some more.
0600 ā E comes to lie on our bed. I get out of bed, and go throw up. I get my bath water, take my bath, moisturize and put my contacts in. I look like a reanimated corpse this morning. I do my brows to try bring a bit of life to my face and get dressed. Itās very misty and cold today so I put on warm brown tights, a long black dress, my warm jacket and ballet flats. I grab my lunch and the cake, pop E into the car and head out. Visibility is extremely low, so I drive slowly. I donāt know why people like surprising other drivers by having their cars pop out of the mist without switching on their headlights. I successfully avoid the drivers who hate life and drop E off at school before heading to work.
0700 ā I am in the office, and I log into the register, before turning on my computer and checking my work email. Not too much in there, so I check my personal email. My stock exchange wallet has finally been credited with the $100. I also ponder whether I should pull the trigger on a V-part wig.
I do my weekly report, and start doing some boring work in the system. I realise I didnāt save the work I did yesterday, so I have to re-do it, so I can have the list of error messages to send to ICT.
0830 ā Everyone is in the office, so I do some reshuffling of duties, so that essential areas are covered while one of my colleagues is on leave. I give the cake to work bestie, who tells me how much her daughter was excited over the cake yesterday. Itās now time for me to put my head down and really focus on knocking out the system work today. I also log into an online training, and I listen while doing my work. My mum also deposits money for my birthday gift and to spoil her grandkids.
1000 ā I log into my stock exchange account and buy shares for $99.14 (doesnāt count as spending, as the money was moved before the MD started). The deadline for other departments to submit their weekly reports to me for consolidation has passed so I start following up. One department is a big problem as they always send their report late. Le sigh. I draft a very passive aggressive email to them. I also decide not to buy the wig and instead ask the person making me my custom earrings that I got myself for my birthday to bill me the rest of the money so I can pay and move the remainder of the money in my account into savings. Our currency has taken an enormous hit in the last week, and is free falling dramatically. Iād rather keep USD cash than money in my account at this point. The training finally ends.
1100 ā Iām getting hungry so I go warm up my lunch, sprinkle on peri peri Aromat and dig in. Yum. I also have my multivitamin and supplement. A lady who sells local snacks comes in. She persuades me to buy maputi (corn nuts mixed with roasted peanuts) for $0.50. I buy them for my afternoon snack. I end up sending the report with missing statistics, and tell the department to send directly to the compiler, as they were late. That was a very aggressive email tbh. Iām still hungry, so I munch on my maputi, leaving the peanuts because I donāt feel like eating them lately.
1200 ā I see a missed call from a number I donāt know. I call and it turns out they had sent money to my mobile wallet mistakenly. I check the mobile wallet and it shows it had an extra $11. I send the money back to the person. Times are too tough to keep peopleās money
1400 ā I snack on a few skittles instead of having more food. I just want something to entertain my mouth, Iām not hungry at all. I review more work and drink more water.
The jeweler has sent the payment request for the earrings. I pay $100 (total spent on the earrings comes to $200, which is worth it for sterling silver custom made Jewellery. I use $50 of the birthday money from my mum to cover for part of this expense)
1600 ā Finally time to go home. I shut down my computer, and drive home. Once Iām home, I put on my bath water, and help L do his homework. Then I do some Swahili Duolingo practice and pack Lās lunch for tomorrow. He requested maize (corn on the cob), a boiled egg and a naartjie. His wish is my command for once. I also pack my lunch, a boiled egg, peanut butter sandwich and a bit of birthday cake. The jeweler sends pictures of the final product. They are absolutely gorgeous. Happy 34th birthday to me!!!
1800 ā I serve the kids their dinner, and go to take my bath. P sends a text that he will be home late as they are working late today. I have my own dinner while persuading E to eat his food
1900 ā Bedtime for the kids. I read them their bedtime stories, tuck them in and tell them I love them. Then I go to watch TV. Iām catching up on Married to Real Estate, Food Factory and Man Vs Food. You can tell that reality TV is my jam.
2100 ā I decide to have some decaf black coffee and cake as my bedtime snack. P and my nephew arrive home. They are later than they thought they would be because nephew dropped his phone in the middle of the highway and they were searching for it. Because nephewās ancestors were on the job, they found it intact. Itās a big deal because this is a major highway and huge trucks use that road constantly. I chat with P as he has his dinner and takes his bath.
2200 ā Cuddles and bedtime for us
Total spent today ā $100
Total spent this week ā $204.50
Spending by categories Food & Drink ā $84.50 Home & Health ā $0 Clothing & Beauty ā $110 Transportation ā $0 Fun & Entertainment ā $10
Reflections on this weekās spending The spending is pretty much about normal for me tbh (excluding the cake and earrings). I had quite a bit of petrol in the tank so I didnāt need to top up my tank this week. The converted US$ prices are a bit inaccurate since our currency had a big drop this week, and most of my spending is in local currency. I could reign in my spending a bit, and focus more on investing. However, I do enjoy using my money to bring joy to my kids and myself. Particularly myself after the absolutely shitty year I had.
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2023.06.08 08:45 hangook777 New teachers (in 2023) do not accept less than 2.5 million won.
New teachers (in 2023) do not accept less than 2.5 million won. You may even be able to get upper 2's. There is a recent shortage of foreign teachers in Korea due to years of stagnant and low pay with declining contract work conditions. Only very very recently has this situation changed and it is still working it's way through the system. Reject out of hand any 2.1 to 2.3 million won a month offers unless you work 4 days a week and maybe are on site for 4.5 hours a day with 4 short classes or something. The ESL Korea Facebook groups and Daves will have the best job listings. If a recruiter keeps steering you towards low pay bottom feeder jobs, quit working with them. Reject anything less than 2.5 million for starting. I suspect by next year if current trends continue, you may be able to soon be able to ask for 3 million won a month by next year or year after. (If the market re-floods with teachers, then all bets are off. For now many are staying home and getting better jobs there or going to China for double the pay of Korea.)
New teachers, please do 5 minutes of research and know what you are getting yourself into. If you come over and get 2.1 or 2.3 then you will be broke here (assuming you have some debts back home to repay). At least check what many jobs are offering on some of the sites. Do not come on here and complain you are only getting paid 2.1 million won a month if you didn't do some research and stand your ground. (This means turning down some offers and being willing to be unemployed a bit longer until you get what you want. Korea is no longer flooded with too many teachers. It has gotten a bad reputation for pay and work conditions unlike in the past.)
Good luck to you. Hope this advice helps.
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2023.06.08 08:31 rsmahi One Week
Got my (M26) Tonsils removed on the 2nd of June and thought I would give an update. My surgeon said the surgery was completed because he said (and I quote) āthey were the thickest tonsils Iāve ever seenā .. so lmao I had that going on for me.
The first day was all good, nothing too crazy. I ate a little bit of Yogurt. The doc hooked me up with some solid meds including Tramadol, Paracetamol and some others to reduce swelling and prevent bleeding. I also got a mouthwash that I havenāt used that much as I was on the fence about gargling. So the meds have helped honestly Iāve been zoned out most the time.
I went for two daily walks for my dog so I got some activity, but itās winter in New Zealand - the air is cold and Iām not sweating, so Iād recommend getting it done in the winter so youāre not hot and uncomfortable.
Day 3-5 weāre the hardest - I didnāt eat. I tried at most to have a spoon of yogurt but I could hardly do it and ended up sleeping most of the time. Water was hard to drink, I kept waking up throughout the night and found it difficult to sleep without the medicine.
Itās day 6/7 and I finally ate some real food today.. I got a roast chicken that was moist AF and ate tiny pieces until I could swallow them. I had an egg and Mayo sandwich which was a bit gross, but I took what I could.
Iām checking in the doctor in 2 weeks time, but I feel pretty good now. I know itās pretty gross back there, but Iām sure itāll heal in a week or so.
My tips:
- Drink water but do sips tbh, ideally drink it after youāve had your meds
- Ice cream is gross - the milky ness frothed in my mouth and I had to spit tons
- Custard worked the best for me
- time your meds so the pain doesnāt hit ya
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2023.06.08 08:14 cordless-31 Goodbye Raids
Absolute shame that they are ending the raids on part 4. IMO the raids are the best part of the game, and probably the best innovation in co-op that Infinity Ward has ever created, even if itās not an original idea.
The raids arenāt that hard either lol. If you go into a raid without a mic, and without selecting other people that also have mics, and you end up hating the raid, then thatās on you. Also, people think you canāt enjoy the raid if you donāt have friends. Thatās bs. I donāt have any friends on Cod. I always match with randoms, and yet I always end up having a good time. Just be selective on who you match with, and you will have a good time.
I hope IW puts raids in mw3. There is a lot they can do to improve it, like adding more Easter eggs, creating more kits, adding new enemy types (the grenadier guy is a great start), and maybe making larger party sizes like 5 or even 10 people. It would also be nice if people could join and leave a raid while it is going on, and with the raid still being able to be finished.
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2023.06.08 08:14 Apprehensive-Fuel734 Streamline Your Business Operations: Company Incorporation and International Debt Collection in UAE
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Source:
https://www.evernote.com/shard/s610/sh/77f365df-6193-d48f-5626-8d98644b2092/hccQF02etOkpbil63D7pvPfepexj6H88bHgmW9Egyi-J4s_wWd1iD7kZiA submitted by
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2023.06.08 08:14 Ashamed-Ad7807 Need advice about leaving my PhD program in clinical psych
So itās been one year and Iām miserable. I live in a major city in the US. I donāt want to share too much detail to protect my privacy but since I arrived Iāve been treated poorly by the program director. Even another professor has noticed she ātargeted meā. The director has called me a derogatory term and asked me about my ethnicity during a 1v1 meeting. She constantly has these meetings with me (no one else has these meetings as often) where she is overly critical and unkind. She also clearly picks and chooses what I say and uses it against me in the next meeting. Itās mind blowing the things she has said and done since I got here. Never in my professional or academic career have I seen this before.
My research advisor also over promised the research Iād be doing and now a year later they donāt seem to be interested in anything Iām interested in. My advisor also promised to help me with connections at this govāt institution but has not even entertained my involvement there.
Iāve mentioned multiple times now that I feel so unsupported and discouraged. Despite this, Iāve gotten straight Aās, accomplish all my research work on time and well, and complete my clinical requirements as they are assigned. Yes Iāll admit, there was a mistake I made with one client but the second client I had my supervisor wrote I made significant improvements.
The ONLY issue my research advisor said was I donāt handle feedback well, which was resolved as a miscommunication. Again, I donāt want to say too much detail but essentially Iām on remediation now for this, after months later even though my end of semester evaluation was good and no issues other than āstill working on handling feedbackā. I donāt understand why I was put on remediation and another student, my friend who got below required grades and has issues with his research is not. We have the same advisor! It seems like retaliation honestly because this remediation started about a week after I told her I felt unsupported and discouraged.
I just canāt take this anymore. On top of this, this PhD program is only partially funded (not full) and when Iām done Iāll be in over $300K debt (including masters and bachelors). I also donāt even know if I want to be a clinical psychologist anymore. I really do love research and love the mental health field, but I feel so discouraged and turned off. I also love working with clients but I donāt know if I want to give therapy anymore. I just donāt know I feel so unsure. I think if this program was better funded and less toxic I would definitely stay but unfortunately this is where Iām at.
My goal is to lead a nonprofit or government programs and make an impact. I was hoping to do that eventually as a psychologist. My partner thinks I can do what I want without a PhD, and make similar salary with my other professional experience (I have several years of executive leadership experience), but I donāt know. I started looking for jobs to get a feel so weāll see. I feel like I got this far in my research/psychology career and I donāt want to give up now. At the same time, it doesnāt feel right for me anymore and it might be best to move on.
Thank you for the read. Any and all help is so appreciated!
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