John was bored one night and decided to get to work on something. He didn't know what exactly to do, so he decided to write a story since writing was one of his hobbies. However, John was so bored that he didn't even know what to write about, so that's when he gave up and went right back to bed staring at his vinyl record copy of The Best of Bread resting on his turntable. He was too lazy to at least make an attempt to drop the needle on the record and listen to some music. Instead, he just stared at the ceiling desperately wanting to do something great, but lacking the energy and motivation to do so; he needed some kind of incentive... John suddenly jolted not realizing that he had dosed off, so he decided to call it a night and close his eyes for good till morning. It was 12:37am...
Twisting, turning, and mumbling, John finally woke up not feeling too well, but it was only 2:00am. He stumbled to the bathroom like a blind drunk man to pee and wash his face. He was cold and shivering like a worried puppy trying to shake off the unpleasant dream that he woke from. After he washes his hands, he stares at himself in the mirror recalling the dream he just had...
A white middle aged man was mowing a lawn. The lawn looked like a small version of John's childhood home in Jonesborough Tennessee. The man was wearing a beige straw hat and had a smirk on his face while constantly wiping his sweat. There was no one else around, just the man mowing the lawn. There was something cold and unwelcoming about the lawn mowing man's presence. He never made eye contact with John, yet John felt as though he was looking at him. "But how?" John whispered to himself... The more John wondered that question to himself, the more hostile the presence of the lawnmowing man became. Still, the man never batted an eye at John, but gave the feeling as though he knew everything about John and was watching him like a Hawk... The lawn mowing man's smirk grew larger, more sweat began to pour from his face as he violently swatted his hands across his sunburnt forehead... Suddenly the ambience became louder and louder which resembled a chaotic orchestral crescendo and...
John suddenly snaps back to reality while still gazing at himself in the mirror; he smirks and tries to laugh the dream away, but there was just something so unsettling about the dream that words just couldn't describe. John desperately wanted to forget about the dream and was too scared to go back to bed fearing that the dream may reappear. He gets back in bed and stares at the ceiling once again but accidentally doses off...
John finally sleeps well until morning when he wakes up to briefly eat some cereal and then gets back in bed realizing he doesn't work on Saturdays... It was dark and raining, but no thunder or lighting, just rain. John hears the sound of a lawnmower revving. It comes in and out of audible range. He rolls out of bed like lazy lion and peeks out of the window only to see the lawnmowing man once again. This time however, the lawnmowing man waves with a normal looking smile on his face while politely hollering, "Hi John! How are ya?"
John suddenly springs upward on his bed like a petrified deer unable to move and process what's going on! "Oh crap, it's 2:00pm!" John says to himself feeling like the end of the world is at hand. John's mind slowly starts to wake up as he begins to relax remembering that he doesn't work on Saturdays. But nothing seemed to be able to ease him away from that dreadful dream. Nothing he did could shake that feeling off, it was almost as though the dream really did happen in some unearthly dimension or realm that the human spirit goes to while slumbering... But there it was again, the sound of the lawnmower slowly going in and out of audible range... John chuckles realizing that the active lawnmowing team outside was the reason he dreamed of a lawnmower in his dream... But what about the first dream? he thought to himself...
It was a beautiful sunny day and John wanted to take advantage of the day while also hoping to forget about the unpleasant dream he had. He ate a quick meal and dressed himself for an adventure to the grocery store. He had to pee before leaving, so he went to the bathroom to take care of business... While washing his hands, he stares at himself in the mirror and chuckles again trying to convince himself that it was just a normal dream. "It was literally just a dream about a man mowing the lawn, I mean how is that scary?" he said. "I mean, maybe I was feeling a little sick and that's why such a normal dream felt so terrifying. Oh well, it's normal. Let's go get some groceries and ice cream so that I can focus on that story I want to try to write this time tonight!"
John hits the road in his silver 2012 Mustang leaving nothing but dust and bad bad dreams behind. As he's driving through a suburban area, he notices a man in a beige straw hat mowing their lawn... John chuckles and says, "Haha, see? Totally normal!" John finally arrives at the local grocery store... John parks his Mustang when the sky suddenly turns grey as rush of pale clouds dim the skies. The grocery store looked rather ghostly and depressing. There were many old looking cars that resembled a 2002 Toyota Camry, some with rusting canopies and dirty hubcaps. Out in the distance of the lot, there was a lawnmowing team truck branded with a decal that read Straw Hat Lawncare...
John made his way into the the grocery store and felt a bitter welcome from everyone inside. Nobody glanced at John. Everyone in the store looked like depressed fish passing by each other. There was a Hispanic family talking Spanish. The father was wearing a green jersey and the mother was sporting a pink sweater with grey sweatpants. Their kids were following along while randomly touching items. John was Hispanic as well, but felt no connection around this family. That's when John started to notice that nobody made eye contact with him, even when he said "excuse me" to reach for something. Not the employees, not the local sheriff, not the old lady looking at flowers, nobody... Not that John wanted to be looked at or noticed, but there was something odd about this, almost as if everybody was purposefully told not to make any kind of contact with him. It was a feeling that was hard to explain.
John quickly grabs some groceries to rush over to checkout to test if the cashier would at least say hello or something. But to John's disappointment, the cashier did not even greet John when he set his items down on the checkout countertop. The conveyor belt squeaks every time it moves; it's movement seems so lifeless, just like the cashier... Still, no eye contact whatsoever, not even if he tried to make conversation. The cashier just looked down the whole time. John started to panic inside, something just didn't feel right. It's not all in my head! John thought to himself... John grabs his groceries and heads for the exit when he notices a dirty looking man wearing beige straw hat smoking a cigarette. This man happened to be the only person that glanced at John, but it wasn't a pleasant glance. The man had a grim look on his face... John started to get the feeling that everybody was on to him, and that even the people who were ignoring him were actually very aware of his presence.
John was a good guy, not a saint, but a good-hearted person. He's never caused any harm to anyone and has always been a respectful gentlemen. But why? Why does it feel like these people hate me for no reason? John thought to himself again. Although John was physically being ignored, he got the feeling that everybody was actually looking at him... John quickly paces towards his Mustang. His heart throbbing, muscles tightening, jaw clenching, head aching; John starts his car and glances around. He looks out his right window and sees the dull grocery store. He looks straight ahead and sees the lawnmowing team truck. He looks to his left and sees a man with a beige straw hat right next to the window. The man knocks looking like he was begging for money. John being good hearted lowers the window but the man speaks before John could do anything, "Your back tire is flat!" The man kept repeating the same phrase over and over as if having a flat tire was bad luck. The man reeked of whiskey and tabaco, he had no front teeth and looked like he was wired on methamphetamine or something. "Come on out here and look!" the man exclaimed. "That tire's lookin bad man, you gotta get that fixed. You got one of them spares?" "Yeah, I got a spare." John said. "I got this, don't worry about me." "OF COURSE I'm gon worry bout you brother, that's what we do round here!"
The man starts telling a story about his brother Phil who had a flat tire because he was being shot at by some thugs. The man's story seems to go on forever and John starts to tune out. John glances out in the distance over the man's shoulder; the man's voice begins to get muddled as John focuses on someone getting out of the lawnmowing team truck in the distance. His heart starts to race when he sees another man with a beige straw hat stepping out of the car, except this time, John felt a very hostile vibration. The man in the distance puffed a cloud of smoke when he quickly glanced towards John's way with an evil look on his face... John looks behind and sees another man with a beige straw hat just like the one from his dream. Oddly enough, this man waved and shouted, "Hello! Need some help?"
John's heart started to pound and he almost felt like fainting. Maybe it's just my anxiety. "I've got to go!" John told the whiskey breathed man and cranked on his Mustang. He peeled out of the parking lot like a rabbit fearing for it's life. He could still hear the whiskey breathed man crying, "Hey man! I just wanted to help!" The whiskey breathed man kept crying, "I just wanted to help man! I JUST WANTED TO HELP!!" Tears rolling down his face, down his now sad face, "I just wanted to help you DOOD!! Why? WHY this gotta happen to me man? WHY! Why man? Come on! I JUST WANTED TO HELP!! I just wanted to help! Ahh!! AHHH!!!"
John finally arrived back home and hurried out of his car into his house... Suddenly everything was quiet... Too quiet... Finally, peace. I just have to rest and forget about that dream I had. It's ok, that whiskey breathed man was just really high on meth, he didn't hurt me. I was just really freaked out, that's all. I hope that man will be alright. I feel kind of bad, I didn't want to leave him there all alone. He looked like he was a hurting man, could've used a little company. No, what am I thinking? He was just high. Why should I trust some random meth-head like that? Awe, he's alright. He's cool... I'm tired now, I'm just going to relax and see if I can start that story! Yeah, that'll cheer me up! It's just life, weird stuff happens! But what about... No, forget it... But why was I seeing men with beige straw hats all day like the man in my dream? Nah, I'm overthinking, it was just a hot sunny day today, duh... But what about all of those grim looking people at the store? I felt like they were on to me, like they were all in on it. Oh crap! Maybe they know about my dream! No way, that's not possible... But what if dreams really are connected to real-life? I mean, it's part of life after all... Nah, that's too weird, it's all in my head...
Suddenly, the sound of a 4-stroke engine starts revving... Grass? At this time? It's late evening. John crawls over to his window and sees a man in a beige straw hat cutting the neighbors lawn... "Ahh!!" John jolts upwards biting his nails. He crawls back to his bed and tries to once again justify what's happening... Suddenly, he smells cigarette smoke. "What's that smell?" he says... He slowly glances at a dirty light blue uniform and before he could make out what it is, a raspy voice 'declares, "WE"RE WATCHING YOU..." Another voice says, "WE'RE LOOKING AT YOU, HAPPY NOW?" Another voice answers that one, "LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO DALE JERK! AH HAHA!" "YEAH, YOU'RE SO MEAN FOR LEAVING HIM BEHIND!" "DALE ERA UN BUEN HOMBRE..." Said a Spanish voice...
John slowly looked up and saw an extremely pale faced version of the cashier from the grocery store and still not making eye contact, but three inches away from John saying, "Hi honey, how are ya?" and then repeats the phrase over again, "I SAID HOW ARE YA HONEY? WHAT, CAT GOTCHA TONGUE? WELL I'LL FEED IT TO MUH CATS WHEN I GET HOME THEN! BET CHU DON'T HAVE THE DECENCY TO HELP OUT DALE WITH A LITTLE BIT OF FOOD, DO YA?" She kept shouting at John three inches away while still not making eye contact. "SO? HOW YA DOING HONEY? FIND EVERYTHING YA NEED? HAHAHAHA! YOU SU................
John wakes up again... It's 2:00am. Everything is quiet. Desperately trying to forget the bad dreams and the strange day at the grocery store, he finally decides to drop the needle on the Best of Bread vinyl record. The music is soothing. He begins to drift into slumber once again.
John sleeps in and wakes up at 2:00pm on Sunday, he doesn't work on Sunday's either. John realizes he never got the groceries that he actually needed, so he makes his way to the grocery store once again. on another sunny day. He pulls into the parking lot, but this time they sky stays sunny and blue. The lawn mowing team truck is gone. John makes his way inside the grocery store. This time, a jolly old man greets him as he walks in. "How are you doing young man?" Says the old man. "Fine, thank you." John replies. Today, everybody was acknowledging John and making him feel welcome. Lots of smiles and hellos. There was even another Hispanic family who smiled at John while crossing paths. Even the children seemed happy. Hmm, too suspicious. It's almost like they're watching me and know what happened yesterday.
John grabbed all the items he needed and headed for checkout. He approached the counter and was greeted by the same cashier from last time. This time she actually speaks to John... "Hey honey, how are ya?" Says the cashier with a cute smile. "Great, how are you? John replies. "Oh honey, I had such a busy day yesterday! First I had to go see my doctor because of my back pain, then my car ran out of gas and I had to tell my hubby to help me out. Then he starts going off on me about how these lawn mowing guys woke him up at 5 in the mornin' and I told him, honey, they just doin' they job. Oh honey, today is much better, it's a beautiful day and my back feels better." Something about this doesn't seem right... She knows... She knows and she's playing around with me... Everybody is... No, I'm just being paranoid. Forget it, today is a great day!
John makes his way back to his mustang with a kart full of groceries... "HEY DOOD!!" suddenly screams the whiskey breathed man from behind. "Whoa man, you scared me!" Says John. "Oh I'm sorry man, didn't mean to startle ya.. Hey, I noticed you got a spare tire now. Good job buddy! Hey listen man, I'm feeling happy today a.. a.. and I just want to give you my hat!" John looks at the beige straw hat... "Are you sure?" John asks. "Yeah man, go on and take it, it's time I let go of somethings in life. I'm trying to start a new life man and stay away from theses drugs out here man. You go on an take it, it has good luck man!" John accepts and takes the hat. The man smiles. John smiles. "Hey I'll see ya later DOOD!"
It's 12:37am and John is staring at the beige straw hat that the whiskey breathed man gave him... John lugged out his vintage 1970's typewriter and was finally in the mood to write. He knew what he wanted to start with, but just right before he was about to type the letter L with his ring finger, the sound of a 4-stroke engine starts revving...
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WERE LOOKING AT YOU. WE KNOW WHO YOU ARE. HOW YA DOING HONEY?

My dad rescued me and my little brother (Charles), 7 years ago. We were found under dense ivy, with many broken bones, only 3 weeks old. He heard our faint cries and climbed a fence to rescue us. We joined a family of 6 cats, each of us had been rescued over 14 years.
Circumstances change, and our dad has had his own health and employment issues. Where he was once able to take us to vets, and pay the kind lady for everything we needed, to recover, to be fit, to be happy, healthy and strong. He can no longer support, the ongoing bills my recovery needs.
We had a beautiful home but needed to move to somewhere smaller. Daddy is a property professional, and we moved to a part finished development in the hills. Watching the birds and golf-course people, from our terrace was fun, until one-day people came into our sanctuary, uninvited, when Daddy was out.
I’m still scared of people, and they came into our home with large dogs, that chased me. I jumped onto an adjoining roof, but the dogs continued to chase me. In blind terror - I fell from a great height, onto the hard concrete below.
My Daddy came home to find me. At first he thought I was dead, but I’m a little fighter. I felt his hand gently stroke me, his tears, as he said, my beautiful little boy, it is ok, if you want to go, be at peace, go to heaven – I will always love you.
I decided to stay, and as daddy held my paw, I squeezed his hand, to let him know. I’m lucky not to have any broken bones, but I landed on my head, and that is no longer the way it used to be.
At first, daddy told the vet to anything I needed to be out of pain, distress or discomfort. I heard the vet tell him, I could recover, and live a life free of pain and distress, but it would take a longtime, and I would be here for a while.
That was 5 weeks ago, and my daddy visits me, and plays with me, everyday, to help stimulate my recovery. I can now shuffle across the floor, grab things with my paws, and I am planning on going four legged vertical soon.
But, I heard him talking with the kind lady vet. He has run out of money, my medicines, xrays, operations and continuous care, are apparently very expensive. I know daddy too, has other bills to pay for his problems, with his health.
I am therefore, asking you to help my daddy, support me. The big bills are behind us, but I am going to be here for another 2 months. I need medicines every day to keep me pain free, my brain stable and other drugs to regulate my recovery.
The kind lady vet has said I can stay here for free, but the drugs are too expensive, and they must be paid for every week, in advance. My daddy cannot afford them.
https://www.gofundme.com/please-help-little-tyty-tiger

Occupation – Government employee
Age – 34
Location – Zimbabwe
My salary – $500 (paid monthly)
Side Gig Income – $0
Other income – negligible amounts from dividends received from my stock portfolio that I re-invest
Housemates – 4 (husband P, 6 year old L, 4 year old E and nanny F. My nephew M is around and makes appearances too)
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Assets and Liabilities
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Equity	$60,000 fully paid off
Retirement Balance	??	I contribute monthly, and employer matches fully. But because of changes in currency and hyperinflation, I don’t really count this as an asset
Savings	$1700	(went down due to travelling trying to get my passport done since it expired)
Current account balance	$660	Includes my mum's money since I'm managing her financial affairs while she's abroad
Loan from employer	$130	I took a personal loan from work, because the interest rates are lower than rate of inflation and repayment is over 18 months. Loan was used to make improvements on our house, and what wasn’t used, I bought shares on our stock exchange, due to hyperinflation, the amount I owe in US$ has gone down
Investments (shares in various counters on our local stock exchanges)	$1,186
Car	$4,000	Based on current resale value. Car was bought secondhand for cash

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Income progression- (https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/vbbb7s/i_live_in_zimbabwe_making_3600year_and_i_just/)
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Expenses
This year, my husband and I decided that he would take on the bulk of our expenses since I do most of the domestic work/childcare. Expenses I pay will be indicated. My salary is now for my expenses, my investments and my savings, and spoiling the kids. Husband caters for the family basics. There was a point last year when I felt my husband wasn’t as invested in the family because he barely did anything financially. By having him cater for all expenses, he is now definitely involved and invested. My husband’s income is just about the same as mine, slightly higher at some times.
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My Expenses

Expense	Amount /period	Note
Car insurance and licensing	$300/annum	This is due in March, and I pay for the entire year
Petrol	$60/month
Electricity	$10/month
Airtime/data	$20/month
Groceries	$60/month	This is for additional groceries such as bread, veg and fruit bought during the month
Kids’ clothes	$40/month	I’m trying to build up their winter wardrobe so I try to buy them something each month
Makeup/clothes/toiletries/ supplements/hair	$30/month	I do not us this much monthly though
Water	$15/month	Based on last bill received in April. We do not get water consistently so bills are infrequent
Donations	$20/month	Ad hoc donations to a soup kitchen, and maternal health fun
Stock market investment	$50/month	May invest more or less, but I do try to buy shares every payday

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Household Expenses (paid by P)
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Expense	Amount /period	Note
Groceries	$200/month	Bulk grocery shopping of staple food items and toiletries
LP Gas	$30/approx. every 2 months	We buy when it runs out. Usually every 2 months depending on how bad the power supply is
Medical	$15/month	For OTC meds (painkiller, cough syrup, antacid stocked for emergencies) and any prescriptions
Pet expenses	$60/ twice a year	For vaccinations and checkups for 4 dogs. Pet food is covered under groceries
School fees for the kids	$347/ term	One kid has fees paid every month, the other every 3 months
Nanny	$80/month	Less than before as both kids are now in school fulltime, and nanny is there to get them ready for school and care after school for 3 hours.
DSTV subscription	$37/month
Transport for kids to/from school	$60/month	L gets picked up and dropped off at home daily, E is dropped off after school

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Previous MDs - (https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/vbbb7s/i_live_in_zimbabwe_making_3600year_and_i_just/) and (https://www.reddit.com/MoneyDiariesACTIVE/comments/yc801g/i_am_33_years_old_and_i_just_graduated_with_my/)
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MD Q&A
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, I have a BSc in Accounting, a Masters in Accounting, and a Postgraduate Diploma in Taxation. My parents both have Masters degrees, and in my family, the bare minimum acceptable for education was getting a Bachelors. My mother paid for my undergraduate degree, and I paid cash for my postgraduate studies.
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Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money?
My parents divorced when I was very young. My dad is the wealthier of the two, my mum has always been middle-class. My mum brought me up with very little financial help from my dad, he only covered tuition and healthcare until I turned 18. My mum catered for everything else. My mum taught me how to look for bargains, how to save and invest, and also how to sometimes enjoy your money.
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If you have, when did you move out of your parents'/guardians' house?
I would say I moved out at 26 when I got my current job. I had moved out when I got my first fulltime job, but moved back home when that contract ended
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At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
At 26 again. That's when I earned enough to cover all my bills without needing help. My husband P covers some aspects of my financial life, and my mum occasionally helps out with stuff for her grandchildren.
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What was your first job and why did you get it?
I worked as a receptionist at my mum's law firm after finishing my A Levels (age 18) while waiting to start university. My mum gave me the job to keep me occupied and out of mischief, lol.
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Do you worry about money now?
I worry about building generational wealth for my children. I want to make sure they will be set for life as adults. I do worry about money because hyperinflation is eroding my earnings and retirement dramatically. This is my second time losing my retirement. My mum and in laws are losing their retirement for the third time, so honestly our old age looks bleak if we do not invest outside of work pensions.
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Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
I receive negligible dividends from the shares I own, lol.
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Day 1
0430 – I’m woken up by loadshedding. I sigh, rollover, and sleep some more
0600 – Alarm goes off. I turn it off, enjoy cuddles from P and finally get out of bed. Our water tanks ran out 4 days ago, and council has not yet deigned to give us water, so we rely on P’s parents and friends to give us water. I get my water that was warming up on the stove, and take a quick bucket bath. I moisturize, do my brows, throw my lace wig on (I cut my hair in January, and I’m at a really awkward stage where my hair looks bad when I wear it out all day) and get dressed. It’s cold in the mornings so I put on winter stockings and a black and white chevron patterned dress, nude ballet pumps plus my warm jacket. I get E from the couch where he was watching Cocomelon and my lunch bag out of the kitchen and we head off to his school. After dropping off E, I go to the office. No electricity means no elevator, so I go up the stairs. I see my boss’s boss and greet him as we do the ZESA (local electricity company) sponsored workout. I log in to the work register, fill up my kettle, and settle down to check out my work email. Nothing urgent came through overnight, so I go into my personal email. The wig company I patronize has given me a code for my birthday, and I’m wondering if I should pull the trigger on my cart. I decide to do a report while thinking this through.
My mum is currently working out of the country, so I am managing her local finances/obligations while she’s away. I remember I have to buy the prepaid electricity token for my childhood home as well as for the house she lives in when she’s working in the country. I spend $23 on electricity for both houses (mum’s money so doesn’t count)
1030 – After doing some firefighting and office gossip I have my breakfast. Today its rice, peas and 2 fried eggs. I sprinkle some peri-peri Aromat on top since I don’t have a sauce/gravy ad I have been craving spicy food lately. I also pop my multivitamin and supplements. I check my team’s work and send back anything that needs correcting. I also generate the multiple reports my boss expects from me. I suddenly remember I need to claim my allowance for performing a role that is higher than my actual position at work. I quickly complete the form, and send it to my boss for his signature. The extra money from this is what I use to fund my stock market investments. I also remind my team to send a report to me for consolidation by noon.
12.00 – I do a major push of all my work due today so I can relax after lunch. I compile my reports and set them ready to send. I also finish my first 2 litres of water of the day, and cue up the next 2 litres
1300 – Its lunchtime, and my work bestie and I head out around town**. I find shorts that L would fit and buy 2 pairs for $10**. We head back to the office and I have caramel popcorn for lunch. Then I remember I forgot to have my afternoon meds, oops. Anyway, more work before heading to an audit meeting
1630 – The audit meeting is finally over, and I rush to shut down my computer, pack up my things and go home. I have an agreement with my manager that as long as I make up for the hour, by either coming early or skipping lunch, I can leave work at 4pm. I had a total hysterectomy end of last year so I still can’t manage driving in heavy traffic. I arrive home, make the bed (P had not made it when he went to work), and harvest chilies from our garden that have ripened. I also harvest a local herb used as a flu remedy and lemongrass, so I can brew up a tea/tisane for the flu affected people in my house. I also pack L’s lunch for tomorrow, a pie, a naartjie and juice. It’s also F’s payday, so I give her US$80 (P gave me this money).
E says he is hungry so I feed him sadza and sour milk by his request. I multitask covering L’s school textbook while supervising his homework and watching Married to Real Estate and the Great British Bake Off. I then have my dinner of sadza, greens and beef. I have a chat with the kids about their day at school. P gets home.
1900 – P and my nephew M go to fetch water from P’s friend’s house. The city council still hasn’t opened up our water supply. I do some French on Duolingo while the boys wreak havoc in their playroom. I read L and E their bedtime stories and put them to bed. I decide to do my hair in cornrows while watching Masterchef Australia. They get home and I help them carry water indoors. I remember that when power comes back I need to boil tripe on the stove, so I cut it up, put it in the pot with water, salt and garlic, and place it on the electric stove. We have serious loadshedding these days, so we have a gas stove and solar power to tide us over. I take a quick bath and change into my pyjamas. While P watches TV, I read Wild Sweet Love by Beverly Jenkins and continue to do my hair in cornrows.
2200 – My arms are tired and I’m only halfway through with the cornrows. I give up and go to bed with P.
Total spent - $10
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Day 2
0600 – I hear crying. E is in a bad mood today. I turn off my alarm, and go to see what’s wrong. E does not want to get dressed for school. I sigh, and help F dress him while he throws a massive tantrum. E is dressed, so I go do my morning routine of shower, moisturize, contact lenses, and eyebrow makeup. Today, I wear a green dress I took from my mum, black tights, nude ballet flats and a black and white coat. E gets put into the car by F, and starts crying for porridge. We are already late, so he learns that the consequence of refusing to eat his porridge on time is to go to school without having his porridge. It’s not a big issue though, as he gets fed at school. So I lock the doors and windows and drive him to school as he throws a tantrum for the entire 10 minute drive. I shove him into the school gate and head to work.
It’s another ZESA sponsored stair workout today. I log into the register, and fill up my kettle with water. I switch on my computer, check my work email and send off client emails to my team for their response. My personal email has an annual report from one of the companies I have shares in so I check out if there’s a dividend this year. I own a negligible number of shares in the company though, but 28c per share is quite impressive. I check to see if my stock exchange wallet has been credited with the money I transferred there so I can buy more shares. It still hasn’t so I send a follow up email o the enquiries desk at the stock exchange. I do have a stockbroker, but I prefer doing my trades myself. I also do some French on Duolingo before 8am.
0830 – Our HR is in a tizzy because people are late for work. I don’t make a big deal out of it usually, because salaries are shit and people are demotivated. As long as my team shows up and does some work, I’m ok. I approve some work, and warn my team about coming in a bit too late. I also tell a teammate that she will have to cover for me on Monday as I am taking the day off. Our internet connectivity is shit so I can’t log into our system to check some stuff. My work bestie gives me avocados from her house. I almost cry because I have been craving avocados, but been too cheap to buy them.
1000 – I have a really bad sore throat. I am also hungry since I haven’t had breakfast yet. I jot down my shopping list for the weekend and head to Pick ‘n’ Pay to buy carrots, green peppers, tomatoes, lemons, cheese, polony and bread. I also buy my breakfast/lunch, which is rice, beans, ox liver and egg salad**. It all cost $10**. I leave my shopping in my car, and go to the office to wolf down my food, and take my multivitamin and painkiller. I also receive my wigs that I bought in May. Perfect timing, as I want to wear a new wig tomorrow for our girls’ day out.
I do some more work, and remind my team to send me the information I need for my daily reports.
1300 – I go out to buy a few items I didn’t find in Pick ‘n’ Pay earlier**. I go to Spar and buy peas, eggs, soft drinks for the outing tomorrow and a sausage roll. Total cost is $10**. The outing has been deemed kid friendly, so I needed drinks for the boys to have tomorrow. I get back into the office, and spend the rest of the lunch hour working.
1600 – It’s finally time to go home. I send my email to handover work issues for the person who will take over my role on Monday while I am on leave. I also send my out of office email, and head home. The kids are at their grandmother’s, so I take a leisurely bath, put on my pyjamas and eat dinner. Then I watch Masterchef Australia until P and E get home. I also get in some French Duolingo practice
2000 – P goes out with his friends, so I snuggle up on the couch with E and watch TV. I put E to bed, read him his bedtime story and kiss him good night. I finally finish season 13 of Masterchef Australia, and move on to My Kitchen Rules Australia. I love Australian reality shows, ngl.
2200 – I go to bed P gets home and tells me some bad news about a friend of ours. I feel very sad for him. He cuddles me and we sleep.
Total spent - $20
​
Day 3
0700 – I wake up feeling like a truck ran me over. I get out of bed, and get ready to hand-wash our laundry. We still have no running water so we can’t use the washing machine. I play music while doing my laundry to keep me motivated
0900 – Laundry has been hung out to dry. F has cooked potato curry, so I boil eggs and water. I have my breakfast of potato curry, egg, multivitamin and coffee. Once I’m done, I give E a bath and dress him. I also bath, moisturize, do my brows and get dressed. I’m wearing jeans and a t-shirt today as my friends and I ae supposed to take our kids out for a playdate. Then I receive a message that the outing is cancelled since one of our group is really sick. I try to think of something I can do with E, since L is out having fun with his grandmother. I do my Swahili Duolingo practice.
1100 – The welder comes to do some work on our garage door. I monitor the work for a bit, and then my nephew takes over. E starts really bugging me to go out. So I put on my headband wig and sneakers, and pack a cooler bag with snacks and drinks. We head into town and I buy myself some ciders for $9. These are for me to drink when the mood strikes me. E wants to go to a resort by the lake so I oblige him. We pay $8 for our entrance. He goes to play on the swings, and I take pictures of him having fun. Another family turns up, and one of his classmates is among them. He’s so happy, and goes to play with his friend. I watch him running around.
1500 – I get a call from my friend that she’s in town with my cake. This cake was meant for the cancelled outing. I pack up our stuff, hustle E into the car and drive back into town. I let out some colourful swear words when I realise I forgot to get our change of $2. Anyway**, I meet up with my friend and get the cake, and pay her $30**. It’s so pretty. I call my MIL while still in town to find out what time she will be there so I can pick up L. She says it will be an hour, so E and I head home to drop off the cake so it doesn’t melt in my AC-less car.
1600 – We are back in town waiting for L and MIL. E wants an ice cream so I buy him one for $0.50 using money I had in my Innbucks wallet. MIL calls and asks me to head over to where she is to pick L up since she can’t leave yet. E and I get there. MIL gets me sadza and goat tripe stew, which I eat a bit of to be polite even though I am not hungry. When I’m done, I pack up the kids and drive home. I bath and change into my pyjamas.
1800 – I feed the kids, and we play until their weekend bedtime of 8pm. I read them their bedtime stories and tuck them in. I watch TV and iron my morning laundry while having a gin and juice until 9pm, and head to read in bed. P and my nephew arrive home from their amateur soccer league match and subsequent outing with the boys. I fall asleep soon after.
Total spent - $49.50
​
Day 4
0700 – I’m woken up by L demanding that I come and play with them. I am still sleepy so I fob him off.
0900 - F knocks on the door and tells us she is off to church. I finally get out of bed and get dressed. I see the boys playing relatively peacefully so I let them continue with their antics. In the kitchen, I find F had cooked breakfast, and since I’m starving, I heat up water for coffee. L surprisingly isn’t hungry so I serve up breakfast for P and me. I have my daily multivitamin. P heads out to go fetch water, while I bath, change and hang out with the kids. I also do my French Duolingo practice for the day
1200 – I have played with the dogs and kids, and I am exhausted. I collapse onto the couch and watch MKR Australia. P gets home, and naps on the couch. I give the kids haircuts and baths.
1700 – L is hungry and really wants cake, so I feed the kids a dinner of sadza and sour milk. Then some cake for dessert. I also pack L’s school lunch, which will be a polony sandwich, a cupcake and juice. The kids play until its bedtime at 7pm. The usual routine, bedtime stories and tuck in is done
2000 – P and I watch a movie while having some alcoholic drinks.
2200 – Bedtime for us
Total spent - $0
​
Day 5
0600 – It’s my birthday today. I am going all out celebrating myself since TW I tried unaliving myself twice in the past year. L wishes me a happy birthday before he goes to school. I get birthday messages from my mum, dad, SILs, and friends. I also get a call from my brother, his wife and their son, and they sing to me. I feel very loved today. P goes to drop off E at school today so I can sleep in
0800 – I am finally up and hungry. I cook a quick breakfast of boiled eggs, and a bean curry. P takes my car to get serviced, while I bath, moisturize, contact lenses, do a full face of makeup and get dressed for the day. Today I wear a tie-dyed cutout mini-dress and sneakers, and my wavy headband wig
1300 – P is home and he drives me to a hotel outside town near a renowned tourist site in our country. We have a platter of fried fish, chicken strips, pork strips, fries, and a salad to share and multiple Savannah Drys while there. It’s really nice getting to reconnect after a very tumultuous year in our marriage. P pays.
1700 – We drive around the area, before heading home. Once we get home, P and my nephew go on a hunt for water, while I feed the kids. P and I head off to take our showers. I remember why I don’t do a full face of makeup when it take a long time to get the makeup off my face.
1900 – The family sings happy birthday, and we eat cake. Birthday gifts were gin and chocolate. I hustle the boys off to bed. No story today, as they went to bed later than usual. P watches TV while I read my novel.
2100 – Bedtime for the grownups
Total spent - $0
​
Day 6
0530 – I wake up and lie in bed for a bit. Then I read my novel some more.
0620 – I am up, and take my bath, moisturize, do my brows and get dressed. It’s cold this morning, so I wear a yellow dress with black polka dots, black tights and ankle boots. I pack up the cake I’m giving to my colleagues, as well as my water bottle. E and I head out. I drop E off at school, and go to the office. I log into the work register, turn on my computer, and check my emails. There are a few pressing issues I need to get up to speed with. One of my colleagues gives me $50 as a birthday gift. I also hand out the cake to my team.
0900 – Work is pretty quiet today, so I update my MD. I also receive news that one of my nephews is getting married. He is not that much younger than me, and could be my younger brother, but it makes me feel so old.
Note on my family: In our culture, even distant relatives are given close relationships so the large number of nephews/nieces is from those relationships. It’s a big thing done to maintain close family bonds. I have 4 actual (in a Western sense) nephews and nieces who are all under the age of 6.
1000 – I head to the supermarket and buy bread, onions, carrots, pork chops, pork trotters and my breakfast and lunch. This costs $25. The meat is the main cost driver here. I have a sausage roll, my multivitamin, supplement and milk for breakfast. I remember that I need to check if my stock exchange wallet was credited, ugh. The website is refusing to load and I’m very frustrated. I finally log in and see the amount is still not credited. I email and send a tweet to the stock exchange. Hopefully the tweet will get them to start moving.
1200 – My boss is mad. One member of my team left his desk without informing me and there’s an urgent matter. I was about to go downstairs to give P the groceries, so I stick around for a bit before committing the same offence as my subordinate, lol. I quickly get back into my office and check on work, sign some papers and letters, and clear out my emails.
1300 – My work bestie has to run other errands at lunch so I decide to stay in the office. I check my personal email and see I have received a dividend of $0.27, lol. The share price will probably drop soon, so I will buy more shares in this counter if I can get them to increase my shareholding. My goal for this year is to breach the 10,000 share mark for one counter. I suddenly remember I have work to do, so I use my lunch hour to do the work, and then take a quick break to eat my lunch of fries and a sausage and do some Swahili Duolingo practice.
1500 – I am thinking of going home when one of my team members calls me to deal with an angry client. I go to the office, and find out it’s a surprise birthday party from my team. I am so happy, lol. We have more cake, and there’s also fruit and juice. I head home feeling so appreciated with even more cake.
1700 – P and my nephew go out to get water. I warm up my bath water, and give the kids their dinner. Today its rice and croc meat. I make L’s lunch for tomorrow, a toasted polony sandwich and juice. I also pack my lunch, rice, a fried egg and peas. And some cake for my work bestie’s kids. I take my bath; change into my pyjamas and hound E to eat his food. If we let that kid be, he would probably live on the bits of our souls he sucks out daily by being stubborn. I am feeling nauseous so I have plain rice with a bit of avocado. The kids watch cartoons, while I do some more Swahili on Duolingo.
1900 – Bedtime for the kids. Today, there’s no demand for a bedtime story, so I just tuck them in and tell them I love them. I read my novel as increasingly feel more nauseated. I end up going to hurl my guts out. P comes home and finds me lying limply on the bed. He gives me a cuddle, and goes to eat his dinner. I get up but smell fish, and run back to throw up. If I hadn’t had a hysterectomy, I would be doing a pregnancy test ASAP.
2100 – I go to bed, and lie in bed for a bit, before finally drifting off.
Total spent - $25
​
Day 7
0500 – I wake up feeling nauseated again. Ugh, this reminds me of having hyperemesis while pregnant. I put my water on to heat and get back in bed to read some more.
0600 – E comes to lie on our bed. I get out of bed, and go throw up. I get my bath water, take my bath, moisturize and put my contacts in. I look like a reanimated corpse this morning. I do my brows to try bring a bit of life to my face and get dressed. It’s very misty and cold today so I put on warm brown tights, a long black dress, my warm jacket and ballet flats. I grab my lunch and the cake, pop E into the car and head out. Visibility is extremely low, so I drive slowly. I don’t know why people like surprising other drivers by having their cars pop out of the mist without switching on their headlights. I successfully avoid the drivers who hate life and drop E off at school before heading to work.
0700 – I am in the office, and I log into the register, before turning on my computer and checking my work email. Not too much in there, so I check my personal email. My stock exchange wallet has finally been credited with the $100. I also ponder whether I should pull the trigger on a V-part wig.
I do my weekly report, and start doing some boring work in the system. I realise I didn’t save the work I did yesterday, so I have to re-do it, so I can have the list of error messages to send to ICT.
0830 – Everyone is in the office, so I do some reshuffling of duties, so that essential areas are covered while one of my colleagues is on leave. I give the cake to work bestie, who tells me how much her daughter was excited over the cake yesterday. It’s now time for me to put my head down and really focus on knocking out the system work today. I also log into an online training, and I listen while doing my work. My mum also deposits money for my birthday gift and to spoil her grandkids.
1000 – I log into my stock exchange account and buy shares for $99.14 (doesn’t count as spending, as the money was moved before the MD started). The deadline for other departments to submit their weekly reports to me for consolidation has passed so I start following up. One department is a big problem as they always send their report late. Le sigh. I draft a very passive aggressive email to them. I also decide not to buy the wig and instead ask the person making me my custom earrings that I got myself for my birthday to bill me the rest of the money so I can pay and move the remainder of the money in my account into savings. Our currency has taken an enormous hit in the last week, and is free falling dramatically. I’d rather keep USD cash than money in my account at this point. The training finally ends.
1100 – I’m getting hungry so I go warm up my lunch, sprinkle on peri peri Aromat and dig in. Yum. I also have my multivitamin and supplement. A lady who sells local snacks comes in. She persuades me to buy maputi (corn nuts mixed with roasted peanuts) for $0.50. I buy them for my afternoon snack. I end up sending the report with missing statistics, and tell the department to send directly to the compiler, as they were late. That was a very aggressive email tbh. I’m still hungry, so I munch on my maputi, leaving the peanuts because I don’t feel like eating them lately.
1200 – I see a missed call from a number I don’t know. I call and it turns out they had sent money to my mobile wallet mistakenly. I check the mobile wallet and it shows it had an extra $11. I send the money back to the person. Times are too tough to keep people’s money
1400 – I snack on a few skittles instead of having more food. I just want something to entertain my mouth, I’m not hungry at all. I review more work and drink more water. The jeweler has sent the payment request for the earrings. I pay $100 (total spent on the earrings comes to $200, which is worth it for sterling silver custom made Jewellery. I use $50 of the birthday money from my mum to cover for part of this expense)
1600 – Finally time to go home. I shut down my computer, and drive home. Once I’m home, I put on my bath water, and help L do his homework. Then I do some Swahili Duolingo practice and pack L’s lunch for tomorrow. He requested maize (corn on the cob), a boiled egg and a naartjie. His wish is my command for once. I also pack my lunch, a boiled egg, peanut butter sandwich and a bit of birthday cake. The jeweler sends pictures of the final product. They are absolutely gorgeous. Happy 34th birthday to me!!!
1800 – I serve the kids their dinner, and go to take my bath. P sends a text that he will be home late as they are working late today. I have my own dinner while persuading E to eat his food
1900 – Bedtime for the kids. I read them their bedtime stories, tuck them in and tell them I love them. Then I go to watch TV. I’m catching up on Married to Real Estate, Food Factory and Man Vs Food. You can tell that reality TV is my jam.
2100 – I decide to have some decaf black coffee and cake as my bedtime snack. P and my nephew arrive home. They are later than they thought they would be because nephew dropped his phone in the middle of the highway and they were searching for it. Because nephew’s ancestors were on the job, they found it intact. It’s a big deal because this is a major highway and huge trucks use that road constantly. I chat with P as he has his dinner and takes his bath.
2200 – Cuddles and bedtime for us
​
Total spent today – $100
​
Total spent this week – $204.50
​
Spending by categories
Food & Drink – $84.50
Home & Health – $0
Clothing & Beauty – $110
Transportation – $0
Fun & Entertainment – $10
​
Reflections on this week’s spending
The spending is pretty much about normal for me tbh (excluding the cake and earrings). I had quite a bit of petrol in the tank so I didn’t need to top up my tank this week. The converted US$ prices are a bit inaccurate since our currency had a big drop this week, and most of my spending is in local currency. I could reign in my spending a bit, and focus more on investing. However, I do enjoy using my money to bring joy to my kids and myself. Particularly myself after the absolutely shitty year I had.

Memory transcription subject: Orllive , Sandshifter farmhand
Date [standardized human time]: February 25, 2137
"Ok, one, two, THREE!!!" I gave one final swish of my tail and finally the bolder went over the edge and fell down the hill. I took a few moments to regain my barrings. I just spent the whole day clearing this pasture of debris from a landslide that happened a few days ago.It was a pain in the cheek, but I managed to get it done.
We could have done this with maintenance drones. We could all just sit around all day while our machines did everything. But the lack of stimulation and feeling of uselessness was a recipe for poor mental health. Besides, the feeling of being needed and marveling at a job well done always filled me with pride. After wiping my brow on the recently cleared sand I swam back to Cers.
"Hey I finished clearing the east pasture."
" Good, we can begin to redig the channels and sow some puffwheat"
Cers was a rather old man. His sandy skin was wrinkled and starting to become paler. His horns were beginning to show there age. Becoming a deeper shade of yellow seemingly everyday. He should be taking it easy, but he never did. He'd rather work then rest most days. An idle mind is like a channel left to the tides. Becoming smooth and pointless. Was a saying he lived by, to an excessive extent.
"But that can wait till tomorrow"
Slightly jolting from the unexpected response I quickly asked "what? but you never cut a workday short!" In response he just began to rub his upper and lower teeth together to produce our version of laughter. A grinding rhythmic sound that the other sapient of the ship found to be rather grading and even painful. comparing it to something like claws on Sheetrock.
"Young lady, we have been on overtime for the past 3 hours!". What? that cant be right!!! He must have the time wrong. A quick glance to the clock tower proved that he was not mistaken, It was nearly 8 o' clock. Was I really that focused on the rocks?
I looked down at the sand and began to rub my flippers on my sides from the feelings of embarrassment I felt at so massively mistaking what time it was. The sunlamps were being to shift red for crying out loud!!! how can I be so dense? "Sorry, I guess I kinda lost my sense of time clearing the pastures "
At this admission Cers simply began to laugh again. " My my I must be rubbing off on you for that kind of tunnel vision."
I could feel my underside flush, It was probably a bright pink by now. I instinctively folded my flippers down to try and hide it. Cers noticing my embarrassment began to soften his features.
"I'm sorry, I should have reminded you it was the end of the day. Rather then let you continue on without saying anything and assuming you hadn't lost track of time. especially considering my own tendency to do so."
With that I began to look back up at him.
"So we're done for the day?"
He then put on a more cherry expression and lightly chuckled.
"Yes we are, you can be off then to enjoy what remains of it. Maybe talk with your friends about the aliens we met today."
What little embarrassment I was feeling quickly evaporated as I remembered that it was the day our first contact was scheduled!!!
"Oh!!! I need to go see how Nechu and Loav did!!!
Cers then quickly turned around and the face he put on was quiet amusing. Displaying a high level of confusion and shock at my admission.
"you know the representatives we sent!?!? and you choose to work today!!"
" Well yeah, it wasn't like I could talk to them during it and I dont like laying on my stomach watching something live. All the interesting stuff would be talking about it with them without knowing anything!"
"I guess that makes sense, you should be off then. I'll see you tomorrow"
"... your not going to do anything more tonight are you?"
"No , I'm going home."
I tilted my head and gave him ann accusing look. We both know how many times hes said that but worked into the late hours of the night.
"... I promise I'm going home now, see you tomorrow."
He then turned around and swam off. I knew he would likely come back after I left. But I learned it was pointless to try and babysit the old man. He was as stubborn as he was soft spoken ironically enough. I swam away from the field.
It was a rather long trek to the end of the ship. I live in hab 5 of a 6 habitat generation ship, each 400 miles long from end to end, and each had a 200 miles long diameter. Plenty of space for a permanent population to love for a thousands of years trip across the void of interstellar space. we had many natural environments in order to seed the planets we were going to terraform with a healthy biosphere.
As I was swimming to the tram I caught the sight of many creatures. From snarks to whelicans . In the tram . I saw fields of puffwheat and other aquatic crops, cultivated by young and old alike. We passed a playground where many pups were swimming through hoops and passing a ball around with their red striped calacarna pets.
Before I knew it I arrived at my stop. Quickly departing the tram I swam to the swimway. A pressurized tube that connected the lower waters of the sea to the waterways on land. Thanks to differences in ours and the aliens time zones the first contact was scheduled for rather late in our day. So I shouldn't of missed Nechu and Loav coming back.
But what I saw when I finally made my way to the port was not what i was expecting. Rather then a crowed of reporters and bystanders that I thought it would be. It was them and an ambulance. I could see a Riner with a Carmors sitting on top of him, he was being hauled in a stretcher... was that Nechu!!!
I swam as close as the waterway would allow and poked my head above water to try and speak to Nechu.
"WHAT HAPPENED!!! Nechu!!!"
A paramedic Carmors quickly ran over.
"ma'am please stay calm we need to move them to a hospital."
"WHAT HAPPENED??? did the tunnel collapse on them?!?!?"
The paramedic shook her head.
"They were attacked by the Aliens solders."
That didn't make any sense, we had talked to the aliens before this and they seemed friendly. If they wanted us dead they would have simply shot at us before or after the meeting. but we were still alive.
"Why did they attack us!!
The paramedic opened here beak to speak but was interrupted by Nechu.
"They tried... to kill Loav... Because she's.... a carnivore....."
"He's entering shock we need to move him NOW!!!"
Loav looked like she was somewhere else. simple staring at Nechu as they were hauled into the car.The paramedics finally got him into the ambulance and quickly speed off to the hospital. Leaving me confused and worried beyond belief.
I tried to enter Nechus room at the hospital but they said only imminent family was allowed to see him. He had gone into shock due to blood loss. He was currently in a medically induced coma but otherwise was set to wake up tomorrow morning. Giving me plenty of time to view the first contact on my phone.
How could they do this to us... for the crime of Loavs diet?

This piece recounts the first time I drank an ancient plant medicine called Ayahuasca. It comes from Amazonian tribes who consider it a sacred plant medicine with healing powers and, given what a hugely beneficial impact it has had on my life, I am very comfortable describing it as medicine.
One Saturday, in the spring of 2016 I was greeted by the medicine man himself with a big hug, let’s call him Blu. I came into his kitchen to be greeted by several women with slightly comical homemade, feather headdresses and couldn’t help but think I’d walked into a kid’s birthday party. In the garden, there was a small festival tent set up which had a hay bale altar with easter decorations.
The ceremony had around 30 other participants and 10 shamans. In the middle of the tent stood the medicine man’s wife, Sun who was very much the master of the ceremony. She had the most daring headdress, flowing orange robes and a rattle in her hand. She spoke to us with warm, friendly humour telling us that we would know the medicine had kicked in once her singing started to sound good!
She advised that each experience is unique and we should try not to have huge expectations, sometimes nothing at all happens the first time. Having waited five years for this day I was quietly confident that this would not be the case for me and boy was I right!
We went around the circle introducing ourselves and explained what we were hoping to get out of the ceremony. Focusing on your intent during a psychedelic experience is meant to help you get what you are looking for.
During my turn, I expressed my desire to regain my self-confidence and passion for the opportunities and women in my life to whom I never seem to be able to fully commit.
Once we had all shared, we learned that it was time to drink.
My heart was filled with profound forbearing and excitement as I went up to receive a small glass of harsh-tasting, brown liquid which certainly tasted like medicine!
I had a basic camping mattress and a duvet laid out for me which I snuggled into before pulling on my eye mask. I was on my back trying not to think too much about the medicine, whether it was working or maybe wouldn’t work while I meditated for an hour.
The shamans started singing and shaking rattles. One of the female shamans, Nubia had an incredibly beautiful soprano voice that stood out from the others. It was while listening to the song of the shamans that I started to feel a warm flow of energy along my limbs. I tried to dismiss it at first, thinking it might somehow be related to my fasting for 40 hours prior.
When I moved my eye mask to let some light into my eyes I saw the tent roof overlaid with a flowing grid of beautiful, metallic, geometric grids with multi-coloured light flowing through the lines. The Individual elements of the grid reflected every colour of the rainbow like oil on water’s surface and I started to feel joyful, like a child rolling through leaves on a warm autumn day.
Nubia started singing to us again and it was like nothing I’d ever heard. It was so beautiful and mesmerizing I didn’t want her to stop.
I could hear the people around me, some giggling and some vomiting or, purging medicine into their buckets. I checked myself, asking if should I purge but I felt a gentle presence speak inside of me saying: ‘No, you’re fine. Just relax.’

They call this presence Mother Ayahuasca. The reason people drink the brew is to speak with and receive her guidance.

My eye mask was back on my face and I turned into the fetal position with the duvet pulled over my head I felt exceptionally comfy with this strange yet familiar presence as I started to explore the un-intimidating hallucinogenic world within my mind. She showed me complex pictures of flowing energy with multicoloured lights in perfect alignment while I was gently gliding along, watching the beautiful colourful spectacle.
It was around this time that Sun asked into the ceremony if anybody would like a second dose. I slowly sat upright and looked around. I checked myself. Truthfully, I was enjoying the experience. I was slightly nervous that having more could take me to a deeper, darker place however I had mentally prepared myself for the full immersion experience.
The presence told me: ‘It’s okay. You can handle it. I’ll be gentle.’
So I pulled on my shoes, got up and slowly walked over feeling slightly wobbly. I was worried Sun might tell me I’d had enough but when I sat in front of her, she gave me a big smile and beckoned me towards her. The second dose was about half the previous one and tasted familiar, not quite as harsh.
After I got up I walked out of the tent into the house. Sitting in the small toilet I saw the walls gently rippling with energy and recognized the phenomenon from previous psychedelic experiences. I’ve experienced mild, LSD-induced hallucinations before but nothing quite as mesmerizing as watching bright sparks of colorful energy emerging from objects and pictures.
Snuggling back under my duvet I listened to the rattles and felt myself floating deeper into the kaleidoscopic universe seeing my own body curled up but instead of my skin and flesh, I saw myself as streaming veins of energy. Millions of thin fibre optic threads pulsated with warm healing energy which outlined my body.
I felt myself lying on the floor in the jungle with mystical symbols and ineffable tribal figures around me. I felt like I was in a different, timeless dimension however I was surprisingly lucid and could snap out of it to check myself with ease. At some point I had to giggle as my boring pragmatist made the smart-ass remark, ‘You’re not lying in the jungle. You’re in a garden less than 100 meters from the Thames estuary!’
I had my eyes closed for most of the afternoon. I was seeing ever richer patterns. When I opened my eyes the patterns were still there but they were overlaid on the reality in front of my eyes. I could change them with the blink of an eye or bring back shapes I had seen previously.
I started thanking this entity for showing me all this beauty and felt the urge to reciprocate. I revealed some personal memories but they looked so very different. It seemed like they had a photo filter applied that filled the memory with golden light as they came alive with breathtaking beauty, streaming with colourful energy. I visited various life moments and it felt like entering into a photo and suddenly being there on that day!
I was there sitting in our garden at home. Once again I was a chubby baby covering my face with baked beans. I was actually there! I was picking the baked beans off my face and pushing them, one by one into my mouth.
They say that Mother Ayahuasca is a deep ancient spirit and I always imagined her as a deeply serious, majestic queen. I started wondering what she might look like… and so she appeared.
She was stern but not an old woman. Aya was young, perfectly matched to my age and exceptionally beautiful. She had long, smooth brown hair and big beautiful eyes filled with power and inspiration. As I looked closer at her exquisite face I realized that her features were constantly changing complexion. Her skin cycled from Amazonian to Latin to Nubian to Oriental and Mediterranean. She was outlined by swirling rainbow-coloured curls of light. The rest of her naked body only came into being when I directly looked at it. I realize that she was not one woman but a combination of every beautiful woman I’ve ever felt attracted to. I wanted her. She wanted me. We kissed and whirled around as we floated through my Entheoverse. My body of swirling rainbow energy flowed into her and hers into mine and this is how we made love passionately.
I had visions of us being on a summer weekend getaway in a stylish city. We lay in luxurious hotel rooms and I remember a cream-coloured clock on the wall, with Roman numerals but no hands to tell the time. I was dressed smartly as I led her by her hand into classy restaurants that had champagne poured, waiting by our table. It was like we were on a never-ending date, teleporting from one experience into the next, eloping while taking our time to enjoy each other’s energy, and passionately loving one another.
Afterwards, she lay in my arms and I asked what else she could show me and she replied; ‘What else would you like me to show you?’ I wasn’t prepared for this and my mind went a bit blank realizing that I could do anything, go anywhere in space and time I wanted.
I asked her; ‘Can you help me find my confidence?’
There was no clear answer. Instead, I had the random idea to become the temple stem of my friend Julio’s glasses. I looked at him from the bit next to the hinge and I could see him put the glasses on in the morning, and take them off at night and in the reflection of his right eye, I saw him coming home and watched his beautiful daughter jumping into his arms. Then I saw on his eyeball the reflection of me walking into the room and a felt warm glow spread through me.
Next, I visited my baby nephew sitting in my brother’s living room, in his red chair. I crossed my hands on my chest like he does and saw my brother and his wife smiling at me giving me warm hugs but more than seeing their faces while they hugged my body I could feel the way they felt when they put their arms around me and press me to their chests.
I saw all my brother’s smiles and happy faces as we jollied about, trying to make each other laugh as we do. I visited all my closest friends, took in their smiles and one by one, as I hugged each of them, I could feel their love for me.

Later I realized that Aya was indeed trying to give me confidence by showing me how much the people in my life care for me

I visited the girl I had just started dating called Anna whose raw energy I find simply irresistible. I came into her new apartment that I’d never visited before. She was standing in sexy lingerie by a floor-to-ceiling window looking down onto the busy Tottenham Court road. I remember her turning her beautiful face as I approached, touching it with ten fingers and kissing her lips passionately as we erupted into rainbow swirls of energy.
I also visited my ex-girlfriend Jo, whose body and spiritual mind I still loved but whose soul is too damaged by the fear of rejection and tough mental armour I never managed to vanquish.
She was asleep in our white room in LA that she had so carefully decorated and I spooned my energy into her little body. She woke and we cuddled and kissed and I said I was sorry it didn’t work out between us and she replied; ‘It’s ok. I wasn’t ready for you…’
I asked Aya if we had made the right decision to stop forcing it and just be friends and felt her nod wisely.
At some point, I remember all three of us lying in bed together but instead of feeling like the king of the world, I felt like a greedy pig.
One of the underlying themes of the whole journey was how slowly gently and unhurried everything felt and I think the lesson I was meant to learn was that it’s ok to not settle right now — I thought I just haven’t found the one, the right woman to share my life with…
Aya kept giving me gentle advice throughout. I asked her about the stimulants I love such as cannabis, coffee and alcohol but instead of the stern telling-off I was secretly hoping to receive she told me; ‘You know they don’t serve you when you abuse them but they are also a part of what shaped you… Take care of the beautiful body you have been given.’
She repeated many times; Take care of yourself more… take care.
I asked Aya how I could find the power to harness my mind which has always been blessed and cursed with a distracting imagination and to keep my lack of attention from killing my dreams.
Instantly, I saw an unreal version of myself.
I was standing in something like a black shiny display window, straight out of a Mercedes advert. This guy was not merely a little bit better than I am now and I realized that the version staring back at me was my best self!
That guy is sharp, he is determined, and he dresses immaculately. That guy knows exactly what he is doing. When he enters the room, people notice his presence from the invisible halo that brightly surrounds him.
I asked Aya, how I could become him and the answer became clear. That guy works. He knows exactly where his energy comes from and all of a sudden I understood — The confident image he projects comes from the love he feels for himself which makes him look loved and successful in other people’s eyes. There is no room for distraction because that guy knows his worth and knows his purpose.
She gave me such a clear image of myself. I can still see myself standing motionless in the black, shiny shop window with rainbow-coloured fibre optic strains lighting the air that gently flowed around me.
How long I lay like that is impossible to say but I guess it was around 5–6 hours but it felt like an eternity of journeying into myself.
But it wasn’t all just warm energy and neon colours. I distinctly remember at some point realizing, it was time to go to the toilet. Afterwards, I walked back into the garden and found the Ewok-faced little terrier yapping at me. I laughed at him as I noticed the blue silver and chrome energy swirls around his head and ears. I couched down to see if I could pacify him but I suddenly became aware that his barking must be interfering with other people’s experiences. I turned to hurry into the tent as one of the shamans came out, to tell off the dog saying; ‘What’s wrong doggy, he’s alright!’ As I walked into the tent there were certainly more people sitting upright than when I had left and I read some irritated expressions on people’s faces, at least three people got up and walked out.
I lay down in shame but all my friend’s energy avatars ran up to me saying ‘It’s fine!’ as they doggy piled on top of me. It made me feel better. I felt them warm the cold shame out of me and I began relaxing again. I played around as before but the energy had markedly changed, it didn’t feel as light-hearted anymore. It was heavier and more serious. I was feeling the effects of the medicine becoming even stronger so I decided to sit up but when I opened my eyes, I saw Nubia hit the deck at my feet on a hastily arranged bed after having just purged into a bucket. I could see vomit in her black wavy hair as I started to think, ‘…oh dear if even the shamans are starting to falter, I’m in trouble.’
I didn’t know what to do. I tried to lie back down again. I asked Aya to help me, as she had several times previously when I’d gotten a little bit frightened but this time I could not sense her presence and I knew why. I had to go through this for myself.
It felt like I was sitting in a shopping trolley, rolling down a steep hill toward darkness, realizing as it picked up speed and bucked to and fro that this had been a bad decision, a dangerous idea and the only way it would end would be for the momentum to collide with suffering.
I needed help so I weakly put up my hand and within a few seconds, one of the shamans sat down next to me. She was wearing a white feather dress and occoured to me like an angel. She helped me sit up and as soon as I was sitting upright I began to retch. She passed me my bucket which I gratefully barfed into…
After I purged I felt better. My angel asked me if I felt okay again and I asked her to stay with me and hold my hand for a while longer, which she did. I gently leaned over and rested my head on her feathery bosom and felt a sense of peace and strength flow back into me. I saw my energy self, the swirling electrons of light curling my limbs as I sat cross-legged, hunched over like a bear cub being cradled by his mother bear.
She helped me lie back down and I started to return to my technicoloured dream state. I asked Aya if we could make love again and she said ‘Of course’ but it felt different, when I opened my inner eye to see the face of the person I was entangled with I saw my own. Aya had taken on my form and this might well be the strangest thing I’ve ever written but I was exceptionally attracted to myself and I realized that this could be how girls who are in bed with me see me. I could feel the burning desire a girl feels when we make love. It felt strange but also good.

They said Ayahuasca show you not what you want to see but rather what you need to see at any specific point in your life.

I visited countless friends, some people no longer in my life becouse we have grown apart and even those whose who have passed away. I visited my German grandparents and told them how much I loved them.
While I cuddled Oskar, the dog I grew up with, and played with him in our garden I looked up to see my dad approach us with tears in his eyes. I knew what he was going to say. When he told me that my grandmother had died I didn’t run away in confusion as I had on that day, instead, I went to hug my mom and for the first time, I empathized with the pain she had felt in that moment of hearing that her mother had passed.
I visited my friend Keith whose passing I have always felt a slight responsibility for since I know he read my travel blog and went to Costa Rica a month after I’d been there where he swam out to sea and drowned. I hugged him tightly and cried gently but he grabbed me firmly by the shoulders and said; ‘It wasn’t you! It wasn’t you…’
I visited my old school friend Alex who I had not been close to but whose misfortune to be on flight 447 still touched me. I told him and his beautiful fiance whom I’d never met that I was so sorry for them having been so frightened when they died but instead of me comforting them, they hugged and comforted me as I lay there silently crying for the people I missed. But it was not painful. Quite the opposite, it felt cathartic, like I was letting out the pain and healing myself.
At some point, while it was still light out Sun said “OK, I know that some of you are still on your journey but we will start having some food soon so if you want to share what you experienced now is the time.” I listened to some of the reports.
Several people said that they had a very rough ride because they had tried to fight it. One girl even said she was convinced she was dying. I felt very lucky and grateful for my gentle, warm ride through my multi-coloured Enthenoverse and wondered if I would ever return…
When it was my turn I said that I had finally been able to see how my friends and family see me and why they think I am awesome which will give me the confidence to finally believe that I am awesome (that got a laugh :). I also shared my new appreciation for how profoundly beautiful my life has been up until now and hoped that it will give me the strength to stop comparing myself to others, to focus on my own path and become my best self.

10 weeks later

My life has undeniably changed over the last 10 weeks.
The following day I drove back to my rented shepherd’s hut in a nature reserve and had an exceptionally rich experience walking through the marshes. The sun was shining and everything seemed so intensely beautiful. I was moved just by watching something as simple as a male and a female bird fly across the water in perfect sync. It made me well up emotionally.
I’ve cried a lot recently and I believe it’s a good thing. I cry on most days.
Usually, it happens when I see someone doing something kind and for a brief moment I get overwhelmed and shed a tear. But again, they are not tears of pain they are usually tears of joy and I feel like I have become much more in touch with my emotions.
It feels like bringing Aya’s female spirit into my awareness has tripped a switch in my brain making me more feminine, hence a more complete human being. I’ve also started to care more about my appearance. My mum commented recently that I looked different and she is right. I’ve been working out more. I get my hair cut more frequently and I’ve even gone and bought new clothes that dress me with more style, even when it’s not particularly necessary.
My work attitude has also changed. I find myself a lot more productive and capable of operating at a higher level while enjoying the entire experience so much more!
I honestly feel more in control of my life. I feel focused on who I am, who I can become and what I can achieve. Previously my decisions in life seemed more vague and fuzzy.
Above all, I feel the happiest that I have felt since childhood. The last 10 weeks have been almost like a too-good-to-be-true dream for me.
I’m also positively influencing the people around me. My grandfather wrote me the following sentence after my most recent visit.
You have this mysterious gift of raising the spirits of people both just by being there and by your gift of empathy.

Epilogue

I have indeed had more Ayahuasca ceremonies since I first wrote this and even though there was a 4 year gap between my 4th and my 5th experience I have felt the effect compound over time. I will be publishing more of my trip reports over on medium and would appreciate your supporting me by following me over there where I also publish contant whihc is not just psychedilic in nature. https://medium.com/@hi_niels

Lyrics in songs I've noticed.
Red Velvet

• Queendom

Oh hey! In the same dream
It kept calling us
Wonderland beyond distant memories
...........
Cntd
We we we strong, nothing missing
Wake up, the answer is Simple
Be Boss, blow the Whistle
The bigger world is noticing you.
Shall we have a festival? I hold your hand.
We've been waiting for this moment. Spread your wings and be yourself.
Come play at My carnival.
Climax? It starts now.
Watch out! We are making the rules.
......
It’s now or never, we got forever.
Sappy
;
You're sobbing and being pessimistic
You're hesitating again, you can't choose
Writing poems in your note, your hobby is sentimental
Look, now it's time to open the door
........
Tell me, which do you love?
It's not bad thing to dream
It's not a fairytale, it's the real world
What are you gonna do? Which one are you
gonna pick?
Reality or fantasy, adolescent boy?
I'm still clearing dating simulation games
using the manual
I'm still a long way from real love
.......
It's not that I don't like it
Escape from being just two-dimensional
Which one do you love?
Tonight let me know your true feelings
You'll really grow up then
Tell me, which one do you love?
(In the video the lyrics are "Logging out from delusion" for a part of it.)
That's not even getting into the imagery in the video.
Feel My Rhythm
Blowing up this fancy ball
We're back, cute chaotic delight
This is gonna be a crazy night
Epic appearance to stunning greetings
Let's have a little fun
Don't be shy, Bae bae
Let the play start
(Birds and wings everywhere in the video. Irene is shown offering strawberries to a gigantic statue of some sort which then falls towards her. Joy is seen standing in front of some type of being with wings, I can't tell what it would be though. Maybe o- I Cant tell, she's, yeah she's blocking the shot)
Imagine anything
Now cruising into a weird, new dimension
A place I've never imagined appears unexpectedly
Don't miss this moment, baby.
Don't confine yourself to yesterday or tomorrow.
I'm truly free right now.
Come ride with me (Sway)
Let's go anywhere (Way)
I want to mess all the boundaries
In this world (Oh yeah)
When the world stops What a what a feeling Come take my hand (All right) A brand new Film We falling deep, You and I Next time, spin the clock Where should we go? Come on, let's start again You and I
Everglow
You used to be afraid of the dark night (ah yeah yeah) Hiding without anyone else knowing (ah yeah yeah) No one say happy ending You stayed silent and ran away (Here we go Here we go like)...
Knock Knock There’s a monster It’s growing larger, the black hole inside of you When you back uh? The howler has swallowed you, that’s the killer Don’t be afraid, hold my hand Your past is making you scared But know your power For the final time, be first You know that I come first I’m the winner winner winner Yes, it’s the last melody To save save save you (so don’t keep) Don’t be deceived by the lie That there is no light in this world Together we will Dream a dream that’s never been seen before Dream a dream that’s never been seen before (Ya) It’s ok if you fall (stand up) It’s you (hands up) Faster Stronger Better Gotta be the best Between night and day, around 5:30AM A war without loyalty will suffocate you, this is a foul Lies, darkness, truth, ecstasy, fantasy My candle makes you explode like a fireworks of melodies in the dawn Don’t be afraid, hold my hand Your past is making you scared But know your power For the final time, be first You know that I come first I’m the winner winner winner Yes, it’s the last melody To save save save you (so don’t keep) Don’t be deceived by the lie That there is no light in this world Together we will Dream a dream that’s never been seen before I’m breaking down the walls, crossing the lines I won’t shrivel up, I’ll jump over one step You got me now got me now two step Don’t slow it down slow it down Shout towards the sky that comes to you Hold onto the key of hope...
Bon bon chocolate

go up to the sky

.
Avenged Sevenfold
Hate to twist your mind, but God ain't on your side
Flesh is burning, you can smell it in the air 'Cause men like you have such an easy soul to steal (steal) So stand in line while they ink numbers in your head You're now a slave until the end of time here Nothing stops the madness turning Haunting, yearning, pull the trigger You should've known the price of evil And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah Ooh, it's your fuckin' nightmare While your nightmare comes to life
You've been lied to just to rape you of your sight And now they have the nerve to tell you how to feel (feel) So sedated as they medicate your brain And while you slowly go insane they tell you Given with the best intentions Help you with your complications
You should've known the price of evil And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah No one to call, everybody to fear Your tragic fate is lookin' so clear, yeah Ooh, it's your fuckin' nightmare Ha, ha, ha, ha
And I know you hear their voices (calling from above) And I know they may seem real (these signals of love) But our life's made up of choices (some without appeal) They took for granted your soul And it's ours now to steal As your nightmare comes to life
Afterlife
Like walking into a dream, so unlike what you've seen So unsure but it seems, 'cause we've been waiting for you Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway
A place of hope and no pain, perfect skies with no rain Can leave this place but refrain, 'cause we've been waiting for you Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway This piece on Earth's not right (with my back against the wall) No pain or sign of time (I'm much too young to fall) So out of place, don't wanna stay, I feel wrong and that's my sign I've made up my mind Give me your hand but realize I just wanna say goodbye Please, understand I have to leave and carry on my own life
Creating God
Standing in the shade of altruism, answering the call Came a modern messiah to save us all Something far beyond the work of fiction, Positronic brain A world that's void of all the anguish and suffering, pain
We're creating god, master of our designs We're creating god, unsure of what we'll find
Never held a high regard for Darwin, selection takes too long A little kick in the pool shouldn't do us wrong Devouring the very last invention man would ever need But exponential growth is a frightening thing, indeed
Sometimes when I look up to the sky I have to wonder are we "summoning the demon" you and I?
Have you noticed that I'm needin' it more now, more than it needs me Got a couple of billion that seem to agree Surfing in an artificial dimension, but we're not alone Now the master has become just a stepping stone, oh
We're Creating, God.
Beast and the Harlot
This shining city built of gold A far cry from innocence There's more than meets the eye around here Look to the waters of the deep A city of evil There sat a seven headed beast Ten horns raised from his head Symbolic woman sits on his throne But hatred strips her and leaves her naked The beast and the harlot
The city dressed in jewels and gold Fine linen, myrrh and pearls Her plagues will come all at once As her mourners watch her burn Destroyed in an hour Merchants and captains of the world Sailors navigators too Will weep and mourn this loss With her sins piled to the sky The beast and the harlot
The day has come for all our sinners If you're not a servant, you'll be struck to the ground Flee the burning, greedy city Looking back on her to see there's nothing around
The day has come for all our sinners If you're not a servant, you'll be struck to the ground Flee the burning, greedy city Looking back on her to see there's nothing around I don't believe in fairy tales and no one wants to go to hell You've made the wrong decision and it's easy to see Now if you wanna serve above or be a king below with us You're welcome to the city where your future is set forever
Welcome to the family
Hey kid (hey kid) Do I have your attention? I know the way you've been living Life's so reckless, tragedy endless Welcome to the family Hey There's something missing Only time will alter your vision Never in question, lethal injection Welcome to the family Not long ago you find the answers were so crystal clear Within a day you find yourself living in constant fear Can you look at yourself now, can you look at yourself? You can't win this fight
I try and help you with the things that can't be justified I need to warn you that there is no way to rationalize So have you figured it out now, so have you figured it out? You can't win this fight
And in a way it seems there's no one to call When our thoughts are so numb And our feelings unsure We all have emptiness inside, we all have answers to find But you can't win this fight!
I see you're a king who's been dethroned Cast out in a world you've never know Stand down, place your weapon by your side It's our war in the end, we'll surely lose but that's alright So have you figured it out now, so have you figured it out?
Bat Country
So sorry you're not here I've been sane too long, my vision's so unclear Now take a trip with me But don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem
You've been breakin' down for far too long Far too many moons since you felt well and strong You see, you could say goodbye but you don't have to die Not ever
Engineer the wires to your brain Architect a code so you won't feel the pain With your family by your side and vigor in your eyes forever Live Forever I'm way up, a god in size, beyond the reach of mortals I shed my human side Father, oh father I stare at my reflection, have I lost that boy inside? Final paradigm What's it really mean to be a man? Think about your answer but please understand While it's natural to fear, I'll make it disappear forever I forever I'm way up, a god in size, beyond the reach of mortals I shed my human side Father, oh father I stare at my reflection, have I lost that boy inside? Final paradigm Singular I am I have the question if these thoughts are mine To live forever but did something in me die? I'm clawing my skin but I can't feel it inside I know the agony of pain would hurt so much better I'm way up, so far up Have I lost myself tonight? Mother, oh father Have you lost that boy you used to know?
Simulation
It seems I should have walked away Reverse the wager I've no means to pay Toto has pulled back the green tonight, in sight And blue pills coat with such disdain I wore the shades for so long That I've forgotten how to see The curtain rises but who dares to pull the strings
I know this might be hard for you to believe and all, But you only exist because we allow it I question all the voices in my head Are they mine or have I been misled? Total understanding doesn't seem to mean a thing When you can't see behind the silver screen, a figurine Can't you hear me scream? By the way of cosmic rays A subtle breakdown jarred the code display A simulation as I can tell, our cell Playing out a hopeless scene We stand to lose all our charm And faith just seems to wane A billion years can seem a stunningly short time You've been beaten down time and time again But still you find yourself at the center of it all I question all the voices in my head Are they mine or have I been misled? Total understanding doesn't seem to mean a thing When you can't see behind the silver screen, a figurine Can't you hear me scream? You hear me, you had one thing to do, one thing And you fucked it up, piece of shit Nurse, patient 666158 needs to be sedated We need 500 CCs of M Oh hello there, dearie I've been expecting you Posturing the way I feel Is truth only what we believe is real? Marvel the sketches that paint the night, starlight And take a breath before it's all erased away
Their song Angels; Waking the Fallen, Sounding the Seventh Trumpet.
Everglow:
Pirate
Yeah EVERGLOW Gonna be mad lunatic, girl When the mysteriously changed moon comes A show that will start suddenly In secret, yeah, dance I want it Ddi-dam-bam-bam, bba-rira-bam-bam A paradise found in a whole new world that is out of sync ‘Cause I’m a pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah Now let me introduce myself I am a fleet I Start this voyage Towards the moon mist Yeah, let me introduce myself...
Twenty four hours, the light disappears Overnight, night, overnight During the night when the dazzling starlight shines Ayy, lift the anchor Girls all over the world Dance tonight And we could be anything, anything now Go crazy, no doubt Rowin’ for the Crown Waving the flag, yeah...
All the way, all the way, all the way The riot we made All the way, all the way, all the way Can’t ever stay quiet Girls all over the world Run tonight Just get on board ‘Cause I’m a pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah Now let me introduce myself I am a fleet Start this voyage Towards the moon mist Yeah, let me introduce myself Ahoy! Sing a song now The hidden moon festival Well, shiver me timbers (Aye-aye) Watch this night together Last chance, get on board Approaching tsunami, disappearing afternoon Everyone falls asleep under these waves Yeah, I’m making the moves During the night when the dazzling starlight shines Ayy, lift the anchor Girls all over the world Dance tonight And we could be anything, anything now Go crazy, no doubt Rowin’ for the crown Waving the flag, yeah (Oh woah) All the way, all the way, all the way The riot that we made (Oh yeah) All the way, all the way, all the way Can’t ever stay quiet Girls all over the world Run tonight Just get on board...
A letter from that future Together with that blinding light Trust me and follow me up to my ark...
Katy Perry and Nikki Manage
Michael Jackson's Best Tracks
"Swish Swish" lyrics Katy Perry Lyrics Play "Swish Swish" on Amazon Music Unlimited (ad) "Swish Swish" (feat. Nicki Minaj)
They know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut What the fuck?
[Katy Perry:] A tiger Don't lose no sleep Don't need opinions From a shellfish or a sheep Don't you come for me No, not today You're calculated I got your number 'Cause you're a joker And I'm a courtside killer queen And you will kiss the ring You best believe
So keep calm, honey, I'mma stick around For more than a minute, get used to it Funny my name keeps comin' out your mouth 'Cause I stay winning Lay 'em up like
Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket
Your game is tired You should retire You're 'bout as cute as An old coupon expired And karma's not a liar She keeps receipts
So keep calm, honey, I'mma stick around For more than a minute, get used to it Funny my name keeps comin' out your mouth 'Cause I stay winning Lay 'em up like
Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket (Let's go) Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket
They know what is what But they don't know what is what Katy Perry They just know what is what Young Money But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut Hahaha, yo What the fuck?
[Nicki Minaj:] Pink Ferragamo sliders on deck Silly rap beefs just get me more checks My life is a movie, I'm never off set Me and my a-Migos (no, not Offset) Swish swish, aww I got them upset But my shooters'll make 'em dance like dubstep Swish, swish, aww, my haters is obsessed 'Cause I make M's, they get much less Don't be tryna double back I already despise you All that fake love you showin' Couldn't even disguise you (Yo, yo) Ran? When? Nicki gettin' tan Mirror mirror who's the fairest bitch in all the land? Damn, man, this bitch is a Stan Muah, muah, the generous queen will kiss a fan Ass goodbye, I'mma be riding by I'mma tell my ...Biggz, yeah that's the guy A star's a star, da ha da ha They never thought the swish god would take it this far Get my pimp cup, this is pimp shit, baby I only rock with Queens, so I'm makin' hits with Katy
[Katy Perry:] Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket And another one and another one Can't touch this Another one in the casket And another one and another one
They know what is what Do they know? But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut What the...
Red Velvet: Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb –31
You need to “Beat It” That boy Michael Jackson ”Bad” I’m not your “Billie Jean” Don’t you “Leave Me Alone” But you’re so ambiguous, I want “Black Or White” I can’t give up on you, my “Man In The Mirror” “Why You Wanna Trip On Me” You’re too harsh Boy, you make me “Scream” Why am I like this? Well, your “Love really Never Felt So Good” It’s so electrifying that it’s like
Aespa
Next Level
aespa
I’m on the Next Level, yeah I follow the absolute rules Don't let go of my hand unity is my weapon I walk to KWANGYA I know your home ground Confront the threat Beat it, beat it, beat it
An unexpected black out The temptation is deep and strong (Too hot too hot) Letting go of the hands held together But I'll never give up
I'm on the Next Level I open the door over there Next Level I'll destroy you in thе end Until I reach the Nеxt Level KOSMO Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it
La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la
I see the NU EVO The hostile suffering and sorrow Make you popping and evolve further That's my naevis, it's my naevis You lead, we follow After learning the feelings Watch me while I make it out
Watch me while I work it out Watch me while I make it out Watch me while I work it out Work it, work it, work it out
Even the unbearable despair Can't break my faith Watch me while I work it Even if a more painful trial comes I won't let go of your hand, oh
Never look back Don’t covet things of KWANGYA If the promises are broken, everything will be out of control The signal is becoming unstable since a certain point in time I'll destroy you in the end (We want it) Come on! Show me the way to KOSMO, yeah
A hallucination quest created by the Black Mamba Aespa, they want to separate out ae, that's right I lose my balance and my voice too In the illusion of being criticized and alienated Nævis we (Call ae, ae) Aespa's Next Level Open "P.O.S" This is the REAL WORLD, I'm awake We against the villain, what's the name? Black Mamba
I open the door in the end (Too hot, too hot) That light is like Fire to you I'm dying to know The next story that will unfold Huh!
I'm on the Next Level I open the door over there Next Level I'll destroy you in the end Until I reach the Next Level KOSMO Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it
I'm on the Next Level I become stronger and free Next Level I'm no longer who I was at KWANGYA Next Level Feel me I'm like a beast Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it Huh! https://lyricstranslate.com/en/next-level-next-level.html-0
Savage
[Intro: Karina] Oh my gosh Don't you know I'm a savage?
[Verse 1: Karina, Giselle] I'm a Killa who will break you, ae You're still hiding and hallucinating Beat you up, we holler I'm not afraid of you, you, hit you harder Push me in, deep fake on me To the unprepared stage Corner me in, fake on me Got everybody, mock up to me You shake me up so that I feel ashamed Cold spectators are collapsed, ae I can't stand you anymore, say, "No!"
[Refrain: Winter, Ningning] Wait and see, I'm a little savage Your dirty play I can't stand it any longer You want to break me Your hallucinations are becoming The reasons to construct you
[Pre-Chorus: Winter, Ningning] I'm a savage I'll break you into pieces yeah, oh I'm a savage I'll crush you, oh
[Chorus: Karina, Giselle, Karina & Ningning] Get me, get me now Get me, get me now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Or I'll become more Savage (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Get me, get me now Get me, get me now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Now I'm going to get you Now, I'm a savage Gimme, gimme now Gimme, gimme now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) I can see your words Your weakness Algorithm (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Steaming, it's steaming Steaming, it's steaming (Zu-zu-zu-zu) MA ae SYNK Don't bother me and bog off, savage (Zu-zu-zu-zu)
[Verse 2: Giselle, Winter, Karina] Mhm, everybody looks at me I'm used to it, I should take a step back I have to endure it like an adult I'm locked up in the glass I want to play such a horrible expectation I'm locked up in that hallucination frame I'm going to KWANGYA, game in Defeating a subtle alienation And making me drift apart from my ae Your satisfying trick We gone KWANGYA, game in Cut it down, my sword of light To you who is damaged It's a merciless punch
[Refrain: Ningning, Winter] See? I'm a little Savage I block your regenerative power I distract you, I leave you out Don't forget, this is KWANGYA I control your time and space Make it, break it
You are the one who protected me when I was in trouble My naevis, we love you My victory, one SYNK DIVE All the opportunities you've created I know your sacrifices, oh My naevis, we love you I know, we'll make sure to find your memories Let's meet surely after the resurrection
[Breakdown: Karina, Ningning] Savage Savage Yeah
Girls
Wake up! In a deadlier war Hold on with your feet(our feet are like hands back home) Hook! Black Mamba I am not afraid of you Hoot! I’ll break you It has changed when we entered KWANGYA Distorted æ more like me, like one A crazy presence that shows The ember that was left behind...
grew into a great evil When I helplessly isolate you Reunite we’re together again Whoo Whoo Attack Beat it Yah You’re not alone...
Shined sacrifice If you found the memory Can you show us? Can you show up? Right now, right here Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are together We Them Girls We Them Girls We Them Girls Meta universe exists now Parallel world All beings have meaning Part of my heart We use sympathetic words and share the body temperatures In the end, we only pursue the value of goodwill I finally became stronger I don’t get swindled or hurt It’s distorted It has started again Make sides Isolate you and me so that we can’t see ahead The algorithms that have been distorted by bad desires Use existence as the weapon and swallow with destruction Ah Evil was started at that moment Whoo Whoo Move out flip Yah I’m not alone I want to protect first encountering REKALL I will hug you so that you can feel Without SYNK DIVE Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are Together We Them Girls We Them Girls To face a peaceful day Inside the FLAT We laugh and love together With my friends Now I’m more curious about the future together with nævis Eventually we will probably meet nævis on the REAL MY WORLD Hold up! REAL MY WORLD Your existence is brighter than my reflection in the mirror Can you tell me? Until when, will we be together? Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are together We Them Girls We Them Girls We Them Girls Girls! Official translation. Play "Girls" on Amazon Music Unlimited (ad) Other Songs from Girls Album Girls Girls
Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Take a look at my WILDSIDE
By instinct, do it Come along with me Let us go down, down, down, down, da street
I didn’t go anywhere Now I could go everywhere Scared of change Just looking from the side
When you protect me and I’m breathing I’m forced into misery like a puppet, muppet I thought I was no good But behind weakness there was strength Words from loveless people, I don’t care about it anymore I will show you the truth
Never tell lies to myself any more Fly now to the place I want to be I’m never scared of going to the sky
Inside O-O-Out My wild side, my wild side The unseen me who has Overcome weakness (WILDSIDE) Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Which this WILDSIDE
Accepting myself that I don’t even know of I want to love more, believe myself more So I don’t get lost, Yeah
Starlight, slash the dark night already So bright, sparkle La-la-la-la-la
Inside O-O-Out My wild side, my wild side The unseen me who has Overcome weakness (WILDSIDE) Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Which this WILDSIDE
By instinct, do it Come along with me Let us go down down I will show you my wild side
https://youtu.be/Qpf26PtBXgo 😬 cya ❤️‍🩹😾🙀🙈
....

There is a person on here hijacking post, venting against home owners of the lowermainland .
As we know this is a global problem not strictly to Vancouver and Canada . Australia, Manila, Hong Kong, RIO, NYC, Seattle etc. So this guy goes by Motherfucker and after he posts, he deletes his username handle. not sure what it is as its labelled [deleted]
​
So my reply to the AKA guy Motherfucker whoever he is, ive copied and repost only my reply.
IN response to the renters attacking homeowners especially those in Burnaby who indicated older generation had it lucky to cheaper homes being on the market 5-6 years ago.
Keep in mind the population in the lower mainland grows 12% every YEAR.
if you have 519,000 people in Surrey , you can expect 60,000 new residence and compounding 120,000 following year , 3rd year 200,000 people. The population now doubles under 5 years. This applies to all lower mainland cities including Vancouver diverse population 676,000 and Burnaby being the lowest because of its policies to keep duplexes from being tore down to Multiplexes outside metrotown.
*Burnaby in 2035 will be more expensive to live than Vancouver as it will fit a "niche" place where everyone will want to live as [first choice] for career families .
Downtown Vancouver its' focus will see the disappearance of Vehicles in the very very near future.
With Population growth being out of hand around the world. WE are Starving everything from land use to ownership skyrise.
Frogs have disappeared, Butterflies are rare, Sparrows are no longer blacken the sky with happiness. WE see more white lines on the ground, more white lines in the blue skies, and more cars following the white broken lines. WE see close to 180,000 new vehicles every year added to the same 3 lanes going on the direction west to east TransCanada highway, Barnet , the same 3 lanes in the direction west to east on KIngsway , the overcrowded Marine drive in every city, but yet no [new added vehicle lanes].
No SKYbridge , no new Overpass, no new Express lanes. WE are losing the curb lane to cyclists who physically compete with 4,000lbs -80,000lbs vehicles everyday while the planning department deceitfully out of nowhere in the middle of the night new green lane. These projects are without homeowners approval votes. HOme property land owners are losing more to cyclists who are low mostly property tax condo owners and renters.
As to the Housing crisis,
its unfair to blame homeowners and the few who owns a few that rents them out at any price. We don't dictate the Business owner or boss how to run his or her business, The same should apply to HOme land owners on what they do with their property including the house(s).
THe real issue with the cost of renting is mainly [population growth], you need to blame.
Second, Force Immigration to deport the many illegal immigrants immediately without a subpoena or court date.
Thirdly we now have educate to all the high school kids and their parents, that their kids will not be living in southern BC. They need to evaluate their reality that living in a prime region like any other place comes with a premium price tag.
THis family entitlement ideology mindset needs to change very fast for those families to succeed. Its is not a given if you come to Southern BC including Kelowna, you are NOT given a privilege to own here unless you can afford it. To the Renters, As I told a Mister Patuzzi , your are not here to be understood , you are here to understand!
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it wasn't cheap as fuck, lol i started 6 years ago having my first mortgage owning a new duplex making $23hr at the time. My gf was making $24hr. She is the brains, she saved up to put a downpayment under $180k who has two teenager girls.
​
So the real issue, you never saved up anything enough. You constantly complained that home prices will drop over the years. A great indicator to buy now was when interest rates were record low and even now , anything under 11% interest which is roughly 4.7% approx , if any bank, is not going to give you a Mortgage for a old cheap condo here, there nobody to blame except your stupidity!!! yes you !
The generation you think is old now including all other home owners charging for the high rent you consider, its because of your low income, you've known for many years that your not making Nurses wages, that today many companies like Hello 911 call takers who say "how may I direct your call?"who only need a grade 12 education, are making minimum $80k a year with the best pensions and insurance plan, you should have been LONG GONE Jack from this Lower Mainland or Southern BC.
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So now what? your probably thinking if you did have a PETITE Mortgage , you live off foodbank because your unwilling to better your life, saddest part of your story if you are in a relationship, that person suffers greatly because he or she is stuck with you having to live in somewhat poverty unable to give her or him a good family with kids .
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You got options, many filipinos, latinos and those from the Maritimes work 3 jobs, send money home and "don't complain publicly". Your option is to move to Southern Asia or Europe to work ESL teacher, they actually have a decent lifestyle ,
>>>>> or Move to New Brunswick to buy a nice house for under $120,000 , make the same wages your making now, They are dying for people to work for them and they now advertising paying higher salaries more than BC. Alberta Subway in the country is paying $29hr.
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On the high rent and what home owners charge. Not all home owners more than one home. Luckily for some of the more expensive homes they have Family that can help them financially. I take it your not one of them, that a discussion you need to speak to your parents for failing you. And Again you were well prepared beforehand what type of future you were going to have. You could have started a RRSP or savings account in high school having a JOB like most kids planning ahead with savings that grows with maturity. Banks have been telling you constantly on tv commercials and posters while waiting at the ATM or bank teller thats always asking about interested in a preferred investment savings account.
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Many homewoners have all their equity used up for paying off car loans, university loans they had, including unforseen debt they held as in Credit cards. Lets not make up shit and the shit going is why all of you "RENTER(s)" are in a predictable bad living circumstances. The Home Owners have ABSOLUTLY NOTHING TO DO owner a home. You think your problem(s) are isolated to Vancouver??? WTF? this is GLOBAL because your generation Globally fuck around as long as they could thinking living at home past 21 was ok and thinking MOM and POPs are going to give me a Heritance? Good for MOM and POPS selling their hard earn money HOUSE. Buying up new condos and LIVING THE LIFE !!!!!! Burn all that money Mom and Dad see the MotherFucking World !!! for the others who have a strong family bond like Vietnamese, Chinese who have financial family support, they financially are having to rent out their basements to be able to live a "DECENT LIFE" so they are not forced to go to foodbanks. The cost they charge for rent is not to get rich, Trust me everything is expensive, they are on the hook for new roof, bad plumbing, must need renovations. All this creates JOBS and Careers that you do not help, so it very unfair to attack them .
There are smart Canadians, mainly persistent hard working WOMEN mostly Filipinas who are great at managing finding ways to get that Mortgage. Maybe you should find yourself a Filipina partner.
Many are care aids , housekeepers, domesticated helpers. They are not rich. They have car payments and own a simple Condo that was bought in the few years.
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Absolutely no reason why you should be into paying rent long-term.
RENTING and LEASING - Have always been short term. Renting is only for those recently moved to a new location because of being hired of a new JOB/Career while looking or Their home being renovated. The only exception is breakups. Because of the BC Rentalsman policies and laws that are not found in other Canadian Provinces including the any other countries like USA, Australia, Europe, It handcuffs homeowners to the renter. I believe that all renters should be forced to move out after 36 months, including those in BC Housing unless kids under 21 are still having to be dependent and those with disabilities. This allows others (new first time renters) a place and forces current renters to find something before the lease is up.
* that Renting is never a great idea, that forces you to own your own place or moving to a new location within a time frame. You got 36 months to get your shit together and find a suitable mature partner who can help as a financial partner or married partner to own. If it doesn't work out, you do like most around the world including Newfies, THEY MOVE FAR FAR FAR to another Galaxy Far far away.
Pull up your panties fucko or as you put it "motherFucker" and move the fuck out !!!! that's what a intelligent person would do. lets not hear about this any longer from you while homeowners are heavily subsidizing your bus fares including the nice parks, healthcare and the city infrastructures.
if your not paying or contributing at least $36,091 annually in taxes , is what it cost the Federal Government to run this country.
Your living, like many, "subsidized" by high income earners and COMPANIES .
* The basic $9000 tax exemption you see when you do your taxes or apply a new job when they give you the income tax form, it doesn't show you what it cost to have you living in Canada because its highly diversified, and complicated!
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There are billions waiting to having the OPPORTUNITY to MOVE into C$ANADA. If you can't do your part financially in contributing or capable of surviving in any Province including BC, Maybe its time you leave Canada for good. Many have done successfully.
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Good Luck and may the Force be with You!
end of story - its time to move on, lol
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Currently as of June 2023
we are not any replying at this time to comment(s) because of the many that are stuck in a low paying position called a "JOB"

Lyrics in songs I've noticed.
Red Velvet

• Queendom

Oh hey! In the same dream
It kept calling us
Wonderland beyond distant memories
...........
Cntd
We we we strong, nothing missing
Wake up, the answer is Simple
Be Boss, blow the Whistle
The bigger world is noticing you.
Shall we have a festival? I hold your hand.
We've been waiting for this moment. Spread your wings and be yourself.
Come play at My carnival.
Climax? It starts now.
Watch out! We are making the rules.
......
It’s now or never, we got forever.
Sappy
;
You're sobbing and being pessimistic
You're hesitating again, you can't choose
Writing poems in your note, your hobby is sentimental
Look, now it's time to open the door
........
Tell me, which do you love?
It's not bad thing to dream
It's not a fairytale, it's the real world
What are you gonna do? Which one are you
gonna pick?
Reality or fantasy, adolescent boy?
I'm still clearing dating simulation games
using the manual
I'm still a long way from real love
.......
It's not that I don't like it
Escape from being just two-dimensional
Which one do you love?
Tonight let me know your true feelings
You'll really grow up then
Tell me, which one do you love?
(In the video the lyrics are "Logging out from delusion" for a part of it.)
That's not even getting into the imagery in the video.
Feel My Rhythm
Blowing up this fancy ball
We're back, cute chaotic delight
This is gonna be a crazy night
Epic appearance to stunning greetings
Let's have a little fun
Don't be shy, Bae bae
Let the play start
(Birds and wings everywhere in the video. Irene is shown offering strawberries to a gigantic statue of some sort which then falls towards her. Joy is seen standing in front of some type of being with wings, I can't tell what it would be though. Maybe one of us? Cant tell, she's, yeah she's blocking the shot)
Imagine anything
Now cruising into a weird, new dimension
A place I've never imagined appears unexpectedly
Don't miss this moment, baby.
Don't confine yourself to yesterday or tomorrow.
I'm truly free right now.
Come ride with me (Sway)
Let's go anywhere (Way)
I want to mess all the boundaries
In this world (Oh yeah)
When the world stops What a what a feeling Come take my hand (All right) A brand new Film We falling deep, You and I Next time, spin the clock Where should we go? Come on, let's start again You and I
Everglow
You used to be afraid of the dark night (ah yeah yeah) Hiding without anyone else knowing (ah yeah yeah) No one say happy ending You stayed silent and ran away (Here we go Here we go like)...
Knock Knock There’s a monster It’s growing larger, the black hole inside of you When you back uh? The howler has swallowed you, that’s the killer Don’t be afraid, hold my hand Your past is making you scared But know your power For the final time, be first You know that I come first I’m the winner winner winner Yes, it’s the last melody To save save save you (so don’t keep) Don’t be deceived by the lie That there is no light in this world Together we will Dream a dream that’s never been seen before Dream a dream that’s never been seen before (Ya) It’s ok if you fall (stand up) It’s you (hands up) Faster Stronger Better Gotta be the best Between night and day, around 5:30AM A war without loyalty will suffocate you, this is a foul Lies, darkness, truth, ecstasy, fantasy My candle makes you explode like a fireworks of melodies in the dawn Don’t be afraid, hold my hand Your past is making you scared But know your power For the final time, be first You know that I come first I’m the winner winner winner Yes, it’s the last melody To save save save you (so don’t keep) Don’t be deceived by the lie That there is no light in this world Together we will Dream a dream that’s never been seen before I’m breaking down the walls, crossing the lines I won’t shrivel up, I’ll jump over one step You got me now got me now two step Don’t slow it down slow it down Shout towards the sky that comes to you Hold onto the key of hope...
Bon bon chocolate

go up to the sky

.
Avenged Sevenfold
Hate to twist your mind, but God ain't on your side
Flesh is burning, you can smell it in the air 'Cause men like you have such an easy soul to steal (steal) So stand in line while they ink numbers in your head You're now a slave until the end of time here Nothing stops the madness turning Haunting, yearning, pull the trigger You should've known the price of evil And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah Ooh, it's your fuckin' nightmare While your nightmare comes to life
You've been lied to just to rape you of your sight And now they have the nerve to tell you how to feel (feel) So sedated as they medicate your brain And while you slowly go insane they tell you Given with the best intentions Help you with your complications
You should've known the price of evil And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah No one to call, everybody to fear Your tragic fate is lookin' so clear, yeah Ooh, it's your fuckin' nightmare Ha, ha, ha, ha
And I know you hear their voices (calling from above) And I know they may seem real (these signals of love) But our life's made up of choices (some without appeal) They took for granted your soul And it's ours now to steal As your nightmare comes to life
Afterlife
Like walking into a dream, so unlike what you've seen So unsure but it seems, 'cause we've been waiting for you Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway
A place of hope and no pain, perfect skies with no rain Can leave this place but refrain, 'cause we've been waiting for you Fallen into this place, just giving you a small taste Of your afterlife here so stay, you'll be back here soon anyway This piece on Earth's not right (with my back against the wall) No pain or sign of time (I'm much too young to fall) So out of place, don't wanna stay, I feel wrong and that's my sign I've made up my mind Give me your hand but realize I just wanna say goodbye Please, understand I have to leave and carry on my own life
Creating God
Standing in the shade of altruism, answering the call Came a modern messiah to save us all Something far beyond the work of fiction, Positronic brain A world that's void of all the anguish and suffering, pain
We're creating god, master of our designs We're creating god, unsure of what we'll find
Never held a high regard for Darwin, selection takes too long A little kick in the pool shouldn't do us wrong Devouring the very last invention man would ever need But exponential growth is a frightening thing, indeed
Sometimes when I look up to the sky I have to wonder are we "summoning the demon" you and I?
Have you noticed that I'm needin' it more now, more than it needs me Got a couple of billion that seem to agree Surfing in an artificial dimension, but we're not alone Now the master has become just a stepping stone, oh
We're Creating, God.
Beast and the Harlot
This shining city built of gold A far cry from innocence There's more than meets the eye around here Look to the waters of the deep A city of evil There sat a seven headed beast Ten horns raised from his head Symbolic woman sits on his throne But hatred strips her and leaves her naked The beast and the harlot
The city dressed in jewels and gold Fine linen, myrrh and pearls Her plagues will come all at once As her mourners watch her burn Destroyed in an hour Merchants and captains of the world Sailors navigators too Will weep and mourn this loss With her sins piled to the sky The beast and the harlot
The day has come for all our sinners If you're not a servant, you'll be struck to the ground Flee the burning, greedy city Looking back on her to see there's nothing around
The day has come for all our sinners If you're not a servant, you'll be struck to the ground Flee the burning, greedy city Looking back on her to see there's nothing around I don't believe in fairy tales and no one wants to go to hell You've made the wrong decision and it's easy to see Now if you wanna serve above or be a king below with us You're welcome to the city where your future is set forever
Welcome to the family
Hey kid (hey kid) Do I have your attention? I know the way you've been living Life's so reckless, tragedy endless Welcome to the family Hey There's something missing Only time will alter your vision Never in question, lethal injection Welcome to the family Not long ago you find the answers were so crystal clear Within a day you find yourself living in constant fear Can you look at yourself now, can you look at yourself? You can't win this fight
I try and help you with the things that can't be justified I need to warn you that there is no way to rationalize So have you figured it out now, so have you figured it out? You can't win this fight
And in a way it seems there's no one to call When our thoughts are so numb And our feelings unsure We all have emptiness inside, we all have answers to find But you can't win this fight!
I see you're a king who's been dethroned Cast out in a world you've never know Stand down, place your weapon by your side It's our war in the end, we'll surely lose but that's alright So have you figured it out now, so have you figured it out?
Bat Country
So sorry you're not here I've been sane too long, my vision's so unclear Now take a trip with me But don't be surprised when things aren't what they seem
You've been breakin' down for far too long Far too many moons since you felt well and strong You see, you could say goodbye but you don't have to die Not ever
Engineer the wires to your brain Architect a code so you won't feel the pain With your family by your side and vigor in your eyes forever Live Forever I'm way up, a god in size, beyond the reach of mortals I shed my human side Father, oh father I stare at my reflection, have I lost that boy inside? Final paradigm What's it really mean to be a man? Think about your answer but please understand While it's natural to fear, I'll make it disappear forever I forever I'm way up, a god in size, beyond the reach of mortals I shed my human side Father, oh father I stare at my reflection, have I lost that boy inside? Final paradigm Singular I am I have the question if these thoughts are mine To live forever but did something in me die? I'm clawing my skin but I can't feel it inside I know the agony of pain would hurt so much better I'm way up, so far up Have I lost myself tonight? Mother, oh father Have you lost that boy you used to know?
Simulation
It seems I should have walked away Reverse the wager I've no means to pay Toto has pulled back the green tonight, in sight And blue pills coat with such disdain I wore the shades for so long That I've forgotten how to see The curtain rises but who dares to pull the strings
I know this might be hard for you to believe and all, But you only exist because we allow it I question all the voices in my head Are they mine or have I been misled? Total understanding doesn't seem to mean a thing When you can't see behind the silver screen, a figurine Can't you hear me scream? By the way of cosmic rays A subtle breakdown jarred the code display A simulation as I can tell, our cell Playing out a hopeless scene We stand to lose all our charm And faith just seems to wane A billion years can seem a stunningly short time You've been beaten down time and time again But still you find yourself at the center of it all I question all the voices in my head Are they mine or have I been misled? Total understanding doesn't seem to mean a thing When you can't see behind the silver screen, a figurine Can't you hear me scream? You hear me, you had one thing to do, one thing And you fucked it up, piece of shit Nurse, patient 666158 needs to be sedated We need 500 CCs of M Oh hello there, dearie I've been expecting you Posturing the way I feel Is truth only what we believe is real? Marvel the sketches that paint the night, starlight And take a breath before it's all erased away
Their song Angels; Waking the Fallen, Sounding the Seventh Trumpet.
Everglow:
Pirate
Yeah EVERGLOW Gonna be mad lunatic, girl When the mysteriously changed moon comes A show that will start suddenly In secret, yeah, dance I want it Ddi-dam-bam-bam, bba-rira-bam-bam A paradise found in a whole new world that is out of sync ‘Cause I’m a pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah Now let me introduce myself I am a fleet I Start this voyage Towards the moon mist Yeah, let me introduce myself...
Twenty four hours, the light disappears Overnight, night, overnight During the night when the dazzling starlight shines Ayy, lift the anchor Girls all over the world Dance tonight And we could be anything, anything now Go crazy, no doubt Rowin’ for the Crown Waving the flag, yeah...
All the way, all the way, all the way The riot we made All the way, all the way, all the way Can’t ever stay quiet Girls all over the world Run tonight Just get on board ‘Cause I’m a pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah A pirate, yeah, yeah Now let me introduce myself I am a fleet Start this voyage Towards the moon mist Yeah, let me introduce myself Ahoy! Sing a song now The hidden moon festival Well, shiver me timbers (Aye-aye) Watch this night together Last chance, get on board Approaching tsunami, disappearing afternoon Everyone falls asleep under these waves Yeah, I’m making the moves During the night when the dazzling starlight shines Ayy, lift the anchor Girls all over the world Dance tonight And we could be anything, anything now Go crazy, no doubt Rowin’ for the crown Waving the flag, yeah (Oh woah) All the way, all the way, all the way The riot that we made (Oh yeah) All the way, all the way, all the way Can’t ever stay quiet Girls all over the world Run tonight Just get on board...
A letter from that future Together with that blinding light Trust me and follow me up to my ark...
Katy Perry and Nikki Manage
Michael Jackson's Best Tracks
"Swish Swish" lyrics Katy Perry Lyrics Play "Swish Swish" on Amazon Music Unlimited (ad) "Swish Swish" (feat. Nicki Minaj)
They know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut What the fuck?
[Katy Perry:] A tiger Don't lose no sleep Don't need opinions From a shellfish or a sheep Don't you come for me No, not today You're calculated I got your number 'Cause you're a joker And I'm a courtside killer queen And you will kiss the ring You best believe
So keep calm, honey, I'mma stick around For more than a minute, get used to it Funny my name keeps comin' out your mouth 'Cause I stay winning Lay 'em up like
Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket
Your game is tired You should retire You're 'bout as cute as An old coupon expired And karma's not a liar She keeps receipts
So keep calm, honey, I'mma stick around For more than a minute, get used to it Funny my name keeps comin' out your mouth 'Cause I stay winning Lay 'em up like
Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket (Let's go) Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket Can't touch this Another one in the casket
They know what is what But they don't know what is what Katy Perry They just know what is what Young Money But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut Hahaha, yo What the fuck?
[Nicki Minaj:] Pink Ferragamo sliders on deck Silly rap beefs just get me more checks My life is a movie, I'm never off set Me and my a-Migos (no, not Offset) Swish swish, aww I got them upset But my shooters'll make 'em dance like dubstep Swish, swish, aww, my haters is obsessed 'Cause I make M's, they get much less Don't be tryna double back I already despise you All that fake love you showin' Couldn't even disguise you (Yo, yo) Ran? When? Nicki gettin' tan Mirror mirror who's the fairest bitch in all the land? Damn, man, this bitch is a Stan Muah, muah, the generous queen will kiss a fan Ass goodbye, I'mma be riding by I'mma tell my ...Biggz, yeah that's the guy A star's a star, da ha da ha They never thought the swish god would take it this far Get my pimp cup, this is pimp shit, baby I only rock with Queens, so I'm makin' hits with Katy
[Katy Perry:] Swish, swish, bish Another one in the basket And another one and another one Can't touch this Another one in the casket And another one and another one
They know what is what Do they know? But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just know what is what But they don't know what is what They just strut What the...
Red Velvet: Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb Dumb –31
You need to “Beat It” That boy Michael Jackson ”Bad” I’m not your “Billie Jean” Don’t you “Leave Me Alone” But you’re so ambiguous, I want “Black Or White” I can’t give up on you, my “Man In The Mirror” “Why You Wanna Trip On Me” You’re too harsh Boy, you make me “Scream” Why am I like this? Well, your “Love really Never Felt So Good” It’s so electrifying that it’s like
Aespa
Next Level
aespa
I’m on the Next Level, yeah I follow the absolute rules Don't let go of my hand unity is my weapon I walk to KWANGYA I know your home ground Confront the threat Beat it, beat it, beat it
An unexpected black out The temptation is deep and strong (Too hot too hot) Letting go of the hands held together But I'll never give up
I'm on the Next Level I open the door over there Next Level I'll destroy you in thе end Until I reach the Nеxt Level KOSMO Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it
La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la, la La, la, la, la, la
I see the NU EVO The hostile suffering and sorrow Make you popping and evolve further That's my naevis, it's my naevis You lead, we follow After learning the feelings Watch me while I make it out
Watch me while I work it out Watch me while I make it out Watch me while I work it out Work it, work it, work it out
Even the unbearable despair Can't break my faith Watch me while I work it Even if a more painful trial comes I won't let go of your hand, oh
Never look back Don’t covet things of KWANGYA If the promises are broken, everything will be out of control The signal is becoming unstable since a certain point in time I'll destroy you in the end (We want it) Come on! Show me the way to KOSMO, yeah
A hallucination quest created by the Black Mamba Aespa, they want to separate out ae, that's right I lose my balance and my voice too In the illusion of being criticized and alienated Nævis we (Call ae, ae) Aespa's Next Level Open "P.O.S" This is the REAL WORLD, I'm awake We against the villain, what's the name? Black Mamba
I open the door in the end (Too hot, too hot) That light is like Fire to you I'm dying to know The next story that will unfold Huh!
I'm on the Next Level I open the door over there Next Level I'll destroy you in the end Until I reach the Next Level KOSMO Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it
I'm on the Next Level I become stronger and free Next Level I'm no longer who I was at KWANGYA Next Level Feel me I'm like a beast Next Level Beat it, beat it, beat it Huh! https://lyricstranslate.com/en/next-level-next-level.html-0
Savage
[Intro: Karina] Oh my gosh Don't you know I'm a savage?
[Verse 1: Karina, Giselle] I'm a Killa who will break you, ae You're still hiding and hallucinating Beat you up, we holler I'm not afraid of you, you, hit you harder Push me in, deep fake on me To the unprepared stage Corner me in, fake on me Got everybody, mock up to me You shake me up so that I feel ashamed Cold spectators are collapsed, ae I can't stand you anymore, say, "No!"
[Refrain: Winter, Ningning] Wait and see, I'm a little savage Your dirty play I can't stand it any longer You want to break me Your hallucinations are becoming The reasons to construct you
[Pre-Chorus: Winter, Ningning] I'm a savage I'll break you into pieces yeah, oh I'm a savage I'll crush you, oh
[Chorus: Karina, Giselle, Karina & Ningning] Get me, get me now Get me, get me now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Or I'll become more Savage (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Get me, get me now Get me, get me now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Now I'm going to get you Now, I'm a savage Gimme, gimme now Gimme, gimme now (Zu-zu-zu-zu) I can see your words Your weakness Algorithm (Zu-zu-zu-zu) Steaming, it's steaming Steaming, it's steaming (Zu-zu-zu-zu) MA ae SYNK Don't bother me and bog off, savage (Zu-zu-zu-zu)
[Verse 2: Giselle, Winter, Karina] Mhm, everybody looks at me I'm used to it, I should take a step back I have to endure it like an adult I'm locked up in the glass I want to play such a horrible expectation I'm locked up in that hallucination frame I'm going to KWANGYA, game in Defeating a subtle alienation And making me drift apart from my ae Your satisfying trick We gone KWANGYA, game in Cut it down, my sword of light To you who is damaged It's a merciless punch
[Refrain: Ningning, Winter] See? I'm a little Savage I block your regenerative power I distract you, I leave you out Don't forget, this is KWANGYA I control your time and space Make it, break it
You are the one who protected me when I was in trouble My naevis, we love you My victory, one SYNK DIVE All the opportunities you've created I know your sacrifices, oh My naevis, we love you I know, we'll make sure to find your memories Let's meet surely after the resurrection
[Breakdown: Karina, Ningning] Savage Savage Yeah
Girls
Wake up! In a deadlier war Hold on with your feet(our feet are like hands back home) Hook! Black Mamba I am not afraid of you Hoot! I’ll break you It has changed when we entered KWANGYA Distorted æ more like me, like one A crazy presence that shows The ember that was left behind...
grew into a great evil When I helplessly isolate you Reunite we’re together again Whoo Whoo Attack Beat it Yah You’re not alone...
Shined sacrifice If you found the memory Can you show us? Can you show up? Right now, right here Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are together We Them Girls We Them Girls We Them Girls Meta universe exists now Parallel world All beings have meaning Part of my heart We use sympathetic words and share the body temperatures In the end, we only pursue the value of goodwill I finally became stronger I don’t get swindled or hurt It’s distorted It has started again Make sides Isolate you and me so that we can’t see ahead The algorithms that have been distorted by bad desires Use existence as the weapon and swallow with destruction Ah Evil was started at that moment Whoo Whoo Move out flip Yah I’m not alone I want to protect first encountering REKALL I will hug you so that you can feel Without SYNK DIVE Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are Together We Them Girls We Them Girls To face a peaceful day Inside the FLAT We laugh and love together With my friends Now I’m more curious about the future together with nævis Eventually we will probably meet nævis on the REAL MY WORLD Hold up! REAL MY WORLD Your existence is brighter than my reflection in the mirror Can you tell me? Until when, will we be together? Follow me (Bow down) Watch me (My skill) You will get surprised (Say wow) We coming Scream (Get loud) Listen (My sound) Call it (Upgrade) We coming Blooming in chaos (We Them Girls) And confronting fear, That courage (Ah Yeah) Whenever we are together We Them Girls We Them Girls We Them Girls Girls! Official translation. Play "Girls" on Amazon Music Unlimited (ad) Other Songs from Girls Album Girls Girls
Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Take a look at my WILDSIDE
By instinct, do it Come along with me Let us go down, down, down, down, da street
I didn’t go anywhere Now I could go everywhere Scared of change Just looking from the side
When you protect me and I’m breathing I’m forced into misery like a puppet, muppet I thought I was no good But behind weakness there was strength Words from loveless people, I don’t care about it anymore I will show you the truth
Never tell lies to myself any more Fly now to the place I want to be I’m never scared of going to the sky
Inside O-O-Out My wild side, my wild side The unseen me who has Overcome weakness (WILDSIDE) Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Which this WILDSIDE
Accepting myself that I don’t even know of I want to love more, believe myself more So I don’t get lost, Yeah
Starlight, slash the dark night already So bright, sparkle La-la-la-la-la
Inside O-O-Out My wild side, my wild side The unseen me who has Overcome weakness (WILDSIDE) Far away, far away Higher and higher To the place unseen
No one can stop me anymore Get set, go! Good-bye I’m not my old self Which this WILDSIDE
By instinct, do it Come along with me Let us go down down I will show you my wild side
https://youtu.be/Qpf26PtBXgo 😬 cya ❤️‍🩹😾🙀🙈
Somethings gonna give and it's not going to be me.

i was having trouble going up this hill and exlerating and other cars were passing me and i didn’t know why my car was having such a hard time and when i finally made it home (it was about a 7 hr drive) i realized my emergency breaks were on the whole time, when i drove it again later it drove normal and had no problems but i’m wondering if it’ll be ok and if there is any damage (i have done this to my other car also and nothing happened but i like my baby way more then that car and i want to make sure it’s completely ok), thank you!

Please check part 1 and 2 for context.
The Tonpa Kingdoms Part 1 (Overview and The Gods) : worldbuilding (reddit.com)
The Tonpa Kingdoms Part 2 (The Kingdoms of Jangshun and Monyul) : worldbuilding (reddit.com)
Tsaparang
Tsaparang is a Kingdom to the east of the other Tonpa Kingdoms, it is marked by thick jungles and winding rivers, a small number of mountains dot the landscape to the west, on the border with Jangshun and Monyul.
The jungles of Tsaparang are known for their dense vegetation and towering trees, with rivers that cut through the landscape and create a network of waterways. The jungle clearings are dotted with small villages, where the people of Tsaparang live and work in harmony with nature.
The people of Tsaparang have learned to live with the challenges of the jungle environment, including the risk of flooding during the rainy season and the dangers posed by wild animals. Despite these challenges, the jungle provides a wealth of resources for the people, including medicinal plants, exotic fruits, and valuable timber. The villagers have developed their own unique way of life, with a deep respect for the natural world and a strong sense of community. They work together to maintain their homes and farms, and to protect the jungle from outsiders who might seek to exploit its resources.
The kingdom of Tsaparang was founded by a legendary warrior king named Raja Dhananj, who converted to Tonpa and united several smaller kingdoms in the area left over from the Indraprastha Empire under his rule, he named it after a fortress city on the border of Monyul that was essential to his victory, he eventually built a grand capital city on the banks of the Brahmaputra River, which he named after himself – Dhananjpur.
The city is a bustling center of trade and commerce, and soon became known throughout the region for its wealth and prosperity. Over time, Dhananjpur grew into a magnificent city, with grand palaces, beautiful temples, and bustling markets, the most famous of which is the floating markets called Jalbazaar.
Jalbazaar is situated on the banks of the Brahmaputra River, which flows through the heart of the district. The district is famous for its bustling waterways, where vendors sell their wares from boats and barges that are moored along the riverbank. The floating markets of Jalbazaar are a riot of color and activity, with vendors hawking their wares to eager customers. The markets sell everything from fresh produce and seafood to handicrafts and textiles. The markets are busiest in the early morning, when fishermen bring in their catch from the river and vendors begin setting up their stalls. The air is filled with the smells of spices, cooking food, and fresh flowers, creating a heady atmosphere that is unique to Jalbazaar. Visitors to the floating markets can sample a wide variety of local delicacies, including steaming bowls of spicy fish curry, crispy fritters made from lentils and vegetables, and sweet desserts made from coconut and mango.
To the west of Dannajpur lies the village of Pashupati, the village sits on the edge of a dense jungle, its thatched-roof houses built on stilts to protect them from flooding during the monsoon season. At the center of the village is an ancient temple dedicated to the Dharmist God Pashupati, said to have been built by a powerful Thakur long ago. However, the temple has fallen into disrepair over the centuries, and now it is overrun with large cats, both tame and wild. The villagers believe that the cats are the guardians of the temple, and they feed and care for them as best they can. Some of the cats are even considered sacred, and are allowed to roam freely throughout the village. Despite the presence of the cats and the fact that the villagers abandoned Dharmism for Tonpa over a hundred years ago, the temple is still an important place of for the villagers, the temple's crumbling walls are adorned with faded murals depicting scenes from ancient legends and there is a sense of mystery and magic that pervades the place. Outsiders aren't rare in the village as it sits along an important road between two cities, but the villagers are wary of strangers who do not respect the cats, the temple or their ancient ways. However, they are hospitable and generous to those who show the cats respect and kindness.
The second most populous city in Tsaparang is called Serindia, it is nestled in the heart of a lush green valley, surrounded by towering cliffs on all sides, this small community has long been known for its bustling markets and vibrant culture. At the center of town, stands a magnificent castle, home to the ruling family of Serindia. Built from the finest stone and marble, the castle boasts towering walls and a grand hall where the noble lords and ladies of the land convene to discuss matters of great importance. But it's not just the castle that makes Serindia special. Just outside of town lies a sprawling grove of wild mango trees, known throughout the region for their delicious, juicy fruit. Every year, travelers from far and wide come to Serindia to sample the famous mangoes and to attend the lively festivals that celebrate the town's bountiful harvest.
The Company of the Wind have a large office in Serendia as every year people request them to deliver these magnificent mangoes so often.
As you wander the winding streets of Serindia, you'll encounter a diverse array of merchants and craftsmen, each offering unique wares and trades. You might stop by the blacksmith's shop to watch as he expertly hammers out a new sword, or perhaps you'll visit the town's resident healer, who is renowned for her ability to cure all manner of ailments.
The kingdom of Tsaparang is renowned for its skilled craftsmen and artisans, who create beautiful textiles, intricate jewelry, and exquisite pottery. The kingdom is also famous for its fine cuisine, which blends the flavors of local spices with influences from neighboring regions. Tsaparang has been ruled by a succession of wise and just kings and queens, who are respected and loved by their subjects. The royal palace is a grand structure, with beautiful gardens and courtyards, and is home to a vast library that contained works of literature and philosophy from throughout the world. The kingdom of Tsaparang is also known for its military might, and its armies are feared by neighboring kingdoms. However, the rulers of Tsaparang prefer diplomacy and trade over war, and are respected for their ability to negotiate peaceful solutions to disputes, the most famous army regiment of the Kingdom is called The Jungle Snakes.
The Jungle Snakes is a feared and respected regiment of soldiers who are known for their unique and deadly combination of a large tower shield and a short spear, this is meant to emulate a snake striking from the foliage of the jungle while the large shield allows the user to strike from safety. The soldiers of the Jungle Snakes are expert fighters, they train in their own unique martial art which requires them to train in the use of whip-swords, a sword made with a flexible whip like blade, although relatively useless in a large scale battle these swords are deadly in one-on-one fights and it is believed training with them develops agility and hand eye coordination. The Jungle Snakes is made up of elite soldiers who are chosen for their physical strength, agility, and quick reflexes, they are fiercely loyal to their kingdom and their commanders, and are known for their bravery and determination in battle. The Jungle Snakes are key component of the Tsaparang army, and are often called upon to guard royalty in battle. Their unique weapon and fighting style make them a formidable opponent, and they are feared and respected by enemies and allies alike.
Tashigang
Nestled deep within a treacherous and barely hospitable mountain range lies the kingdom of Taishigang, protected by rugged terrain and guarded by fiercely loyal soldiers. The people of this kingdom are rugged and tough, accustomed to the harsh conditions of their environment and deeply connected to the land that sustains them.
The tallest mountain in the known world is nestled within its borders, it is a revered holy site believed to be the last place on Earth the physical forms of the Three Gods were seen.
Taishigang is named after the two main ethnic groups that reside in the area, the Taishi and the Gangparan, occupying the north-west and the south-east respectively, the Taishi are said to be early cousins of the Jangshun people who migrated into the area hundreds of years before and the Gangparan are a group of people who escaped from the fall of the Indraprastha empire by migrating to the mountains. The kingdom is ruled by a council of clan leaders, with one among them being High Chief and first among equals, these leaders are chosen by their clans for their strength, cunning, and wisdom and in turn these leaders choose one among them to be High Chief, these leaders make decisions that affect the entire kingdom, and they are known for their fierce loyalty to the land and the people. The economy of the kingdom is based on mining and lumber, with the rugged landscape yielding valuable minerals and timber. The inhabitants of the kingdom work as miners and lumberjacks, extracting these resources from the earth and using them to build their homes and defenses.
Taishigang is home to a religious order of healers called “The Order of Spring” who are a a highly respected group of monks, the members of this order are known for their extensive knowledge of herbal medicine and natural remedies, as well as their spiritual practices that are believed to aid in the healing process. The Order of Spring has a long-standing tradition of passing down their healing techniques and knowledge from generation to generation, ensuring that their skills and expertise are not lost over time they are highly revered by the people of Taishigang, who often seek their help when they are sick or injured. Due to the harsh climate and rugged terrain of Taishigang, the Order of Spring has developed unique healing methods that are tailored to the specific challenges of the environment. They are experts in treating frostbite, hypothermia, altitude sickness, and other ailments that are common in cold, mountainous regions.
The members of the Order of Spring are dedicated to their craft and often travel far and wide in search of rare and unique ingredients to use in their remedies. They are known to journey deep into the mountain ranges and even venture into neighboring kingdoms to track down plants and herbs that are believed to hold powerful healing properties. Despite their extensive knowledge and skills, the healers of the Order of Spring are humble and compassionate. They offer their services to anyone in need, regardless of their social status or wealth. It is said that their selfless dedication to healing has helped to foster a strong sense of community and trust within the kingdom of Taishigang. The capital city of Taishigang is called Dzonggar, which means "fortress on the mountain" in the ancient language of the region. It is situated on a massive mountain peak that is over 4,000 meters high, with steep cliffs and a treacherous climb to reach the top. The city is built on multiple levels that follow the contours of the mountain, with each level connected by steep staircases and winding paths. The uppermost level of Dzonggar is the highest point in the city and is home to the Dragar Dzong, which serves as the administrative center for the region.
The Dzong is an imposing fortress with thick walls, ornate carvings, and intricate murals depicting scenes from Tonpa mythology. The upper level is also home to several important temples and monasteries that offer stunning views of the surrounding mountains. As one descends the mountain, the levels become more densely populated with homes and businesses. The middle levels of the city are home to bustling marketplaces, where merchants sell everything from spices to textiles to pottery. The lower levels of the city are home to workshops and industry, where artisans create beautiful handicrafts using traditional techniques. The city's buildings are made of stone and wood, with sloping roofs to withstand heavy snowfall. The streets are narrow and winding, with small shops and homes perched on the edge of the mountain. Each level of the city is connected by steep staircases and winding paths, making navigation through the city a challenging but rewarding experience. Despite its rugged location and challenging terrain, Dzonggar is a bustling city with a vibrant culture.
The people of Dzonggar are known for their colorful textiles, intricate woodcarvings, and exquisite metalwork. The city is also famous for its festivals, which are held throughout the year to celebrate the changing seasons, important religious holidays, and the city's rich cultural heritage. The military of the kingdom is composed of skilled rangers and guerilla warriors, trained to navigate the treacherous mountain terrain and to use it to their advantage. The rangers are experts in archery and hunting, the most famous regiment from Taishigang is called The Mountain Demons.
The Mountain Demons are an elite fighting force said to be established by the Lhakpa dynasty, the Mountain Demons only take the tallest of warriors some are said to reach up to 2 meters high, when one is chosen they go on a diet of carbs and protein to gain body mass, their training regiment consists of lifting heavy things and running long distances carrying heavy boulders, in battle they carry massive heavy weapons like hammers, clubs and sometimes even heavy metal gloves. Taishigang is home to the famous Druk-Lha Tsham, the Dragon-Tooth Forest, an expansive woodland that stretches across the western part of the Kingdom. The forest is named after the imposing mountain range that rises up from the trees like the teeth of a dragon.
The forest is home to a diverse array of flora and fauna, including towering pine trees, colorful wildflowers, and a variety of wildlife such as deer, foxes, and even the occasional black bear, streams and rivers flow through the forest in the summer, providing water for the plants and animals that call it home. Despite its natural beauty, the Dragon-Tooth Forest is also home to danger. Bandits and outlaws are known to hide within its depths, preying on travelers who venture too far from the safety of the nearby villages.
The forest is home to the village of Kulik a unique place where the houses are built high among the trees, the villagers live in beautiful treehouses connected by a network of wooden bridges that wind their way through the forest. The houses are made from local wood and are decorated with carvings of animals and intricate patterns. Some houses have balconies where the villagers can sit and enjoy the beautiful views of the forest.
The village has a central meeting place where the villagers gather to socialize and discuss village matters, the meeting place is just outside the only stone building in the village, the Lalimamandir, said to be a stone temple dedicated to the Dharmist God Lalima but repurposed into the home of the ruling Gurung Clan, the Gurung, saw similarities between Lalima and Caihong, who after a lengthy purification process instead dedicated the building to The Mother but kept the original name to honour the builders. The villagers are self-sufficient and grow their own food in small gardens and farms scattered throughout the forest. They also hunt and fish in the nearby rivers and streams. The villagers are known for their hospitality and welcome visitors with open arms, inviting them to stay in their beautiful treehouses and share in their way of life.
The people of the kingdom of Taishigang hold a special reverence for Caihong for it is her practical ways that help them survive the rugged terrain. The people of the kingdom have a rich artistic and musical tradition, heavily influenced by their connection to the land and the animals. They are known for their intricate carvings, woven textiles, and colorful paintings, as well as their haunting music and dance.
Khotesh
Khotesh is a kingdom to the west, most of it is located in a vast and arid desert, with small portion of the Kingdom located on grassy planes and snow-capped mountains. The kingdom is known for its rugged terrain, with towering sand dunes, rocky outcroppings, and deep canyons. Most of its people are former nomads who converted to the religion of Tonpa and settled in one place, but there are still some nomadic people who travel with their herds across the desert. The people of Khotesh practice religion fervently, with Tonpa's teachings serving as the foundation for their daily lives. Their art and architecture reflect the influence of the Three Gods, with intricate carvings and paintings of Tonpa and his disciples adorning the walls of many buildings in the kingdom. The kingdom is ruled by a powerful monarch who resides in a grand palace in the capital city of Khanbalik. The palace is a majestic structure with domed roofs and intricate carvings, surrounded by lush gardens and fountains. Despite the harshness of the environment, the people of Khotesh have a rich cultural heritage. They are proud of their nomadic roots, and many still wear traditional clothing and practice traditional customs. The former nomads who settled in one place have formed close-knit communities, and their hospitality to travelers is legendary. Its capital city; Khanbalik is a built upon the grassy plains of the hills to the east of the Kingdom. The city is situated at the junction of several trade routes, which has made it a hub of commerce and culture. Its walls are made of wood and earth, with watchtowers at regular intervals to provide defense against raiders and invaders. The city is known for its harsh and unpredictable climate, with hot winds blowing in from the desert and cold winds descending from the mountains. These winds collide over Khanbalik, creating powerful storms that batter the city every autumn and spring. The storms bring heavy rains, lightning, and hail, making travel and trade difficult during these seasons, it is said that the sun-showers that regularly bathe the city in this time are a meeting of the Three Gods as the Sun, Wind and Rain are all aspects of Caihong, Druk-Ta and Daiden respectively, people often dance in the streets when a sun-shower happens. Despite the challenges posed by the climate, Khanbalik remains a vibrant and bustling city. The streets are crowded with people from all walks of life, from wealthy merchants to wandering nomads. The city is divided into districts based on trade and social status, with the grandest buildings located near the center of the city. The palace of the ruling Khan is one of the most impressive structures in Khanbalik, with ornate wooden carvings and sweeping roofs that curve upward like the wings of a bird. The temple district is also a popular destination for visitors to the city, with a variety of religions represented in the many shrines and sanctuaries.
Khanbalik is not only a bustling hub of commerce and culture, but it is also a melting pot of different ethnic groups and cultures. One of the unique features of Khanbalik is the seasonal influx of nomads who come to the city a few times a year during the changing of the seasons. As the seasons shift from summer to autumn and from winter to spring, nomadic herders from the surrounding grasslands and mountains make their way to Khanbalik to trade goods, socialize, and partake in the city's offerings. The changing of the seasons is a time of celebration and renewal, and the nomads play an important role in this cycle. During the autumn season, nomads bring with them fresh produce such as fruits, vegetables, and grains. They also bring livestock such as sheep, goats, and horses to sell in the city's markets. In turn, they purchase items such as tools, clothing, and other necessities that they cannot produce on their own. In the spring, nomads return to Khanbalik with wool, meat, and dairy products from their herds. They also bring with them handmade crafts such as felt blankets, rugs, and clothing, which they trade for goods that will sustain them throughout the summer months. The seasonal exchange between the nomads and the city-dwellers is an important part of the culture and economy of Khanbalik. It fosters a sense of community and interdependence between the different groups, and it has been a tradition for generations.
One of the most interesting places in Khotesh is the town of Rokhala, a town carved into a towering sandstone cliff that rises high above the surrounding plains, the town's location is strategic, as it is nestled in a valley along a popular trade route, making it a profitable place for a settlement, the entrance to the town is a narrow, winding path that cuts into the cliff face, providing a natural defense against invaders. The town is built in a series of caves and carved out of sandstone, with buildings made from the same material, the structures are connected by narrow walkways, staircases, and bridges that cross over the canyon below. The town has a unique charm with its rustic stone architecture and winding passageways that twist and turn, creating an intriguing labyrinth of alleys and streets. The town has a diverse population, including traders, craftsmen, and mushroom farmers who make use of shallow caves to grow them in.
The town is home to a massive sandstone mining operation that exports sandstone all over the known world, sandstone from Rokhala is seen in the Confucian Kingdoms to the East, the Dharmist Kingdoms to the South and even the Caliphist and Mazdan Kingdoms to the West. Another interesting sight in the deserts of Khotesh is Altan Gazar, a bustling caravan that travels in harmony with the seasonal migration of a massive herd of Ibex, tents and yurts, woven from the finest camel and goat hair, are packed up and loaded onto sturdy pack animals as the city prepares to move to its next destination, the inhabitants are skilled in the art of packing and unpacking, swiftly transforming their temporary dwellings into a well-organized mobile settlement. As the herd of Ibex moves across the arid landscape, guided by the keen eyes of the city's inhabitants, the nomadic city follows in its wake, the city's layout is flexible and adaptable, with a central encampment for the tribal leader and their entourage, surrounded by the dwellings of other important individuals and their families. Water is a precious commodity in the desert, and the city relies on natural springs and wells discovered along the migration route, the inhabitants are experts in locating and utilizing these hidden water sources, carefully managing their usage to sustain their community and animals throughout their journey, rainwater is also collected during rare showers and stored in large containers for times when water is scarce.
The Ibex is an integral part of life to Altan Gazar, most adults carry a drinking horn made of Ibex horn, Ibex meat is regularly consumed in the spring with various spices found in the semi-arid grassy plains of their spring migration pattern, Ibex blood is sometimes drunk when water is scarce, fermented Ibex milk is a regular drink among the adults and Ibex skins are worn during cold winter nights. The city's architecture is designed to be lightweight and portable, with structures made of woven mats, reeds, and mud bricks. The city's inhabitants are skilled in constructing and deconstructing their homes as they move, utilizing locally available materials. Life in the nomadic city is intertwined with the rhythm of the desert and the migratory patterns of the Ibex. The inhabitants have a deep bond with their animals, particularly camels, which are used for transportation, milk, and meat. The city is a hub of trade and commerce, with merchants and traders from nearby towns and villages joining the city's journey, bartering for goods and services along the way.
The army of Khotesh is renowned for its hardiness and combat prowess in desert conditions. The kingdom has a long history of fending off invasions and raids from neighboring regions, and its army is specifically trained to operate effectively in desert terrain. The soldiers of Khotesh are known for their ruggedness and resilience, with many of them hailing from nomadic backgrounds. They are skilled in mounted combat, with cavalry units comprising a significant portion of the army. These cavalry units are particularly adept at hit-and-run tactics, using their speed and mobility to strike quickly and then retreat before the enemy can respond.
In addition to cavalry, the army of Khotesh also includes infantry units that specialize in desert warfare. These soldiers are trained to navigate harsh terrain and extreme temperatures, and they are equipped with light armor and weapons that are well-suited for the desert environment. They are skilled in using terrain to their advantage, and are adept at setting ambushes and launching surprise attacks. One of the unique features of the Khotesh army is their use of desert animals in combat. The kingdom is home to a variety of animals that have been domesticated and trained for military purposes, including camels and falcons. Camels are particularly useful in desert warfare due to their ability to traverse long distances with little water, and they are often used to transport soldiers and supplies across the harsh desert terrain. Falcons, on the other hand, are used for scouting and reconnaissance, and are trained to locate and track enemy troops.
The most famous army regiment of Khotesh is called The Scorpions, they are renowned desert survivalists and lone assassins, but in times of battle they are called upon to form a vanguard for the ruling Khan or Khanum, alone they are formidable but as a unit they are immensely dangerous, they are expert hand to hand combatants and excel at short, light weapons like shortswords and javelins. Another famed regiment of Khotesh is called The Hailstones, they are a Camel cavalry unit who use shock cavalry tactics, their camels have two riders, a spearman on the front and an archer on the back, the camels are bred to be massive to carry out such a feat, the spearman on the front charges into infantry lines with the spear and then turns away from the enemy to line up another charge while the archer on the back fires into their ranks, it is a very effective tactic that has won many battles.

v1.0 here

Purpose

This greatly expanded guide is to explain how to get every game from Gameboy to 3DS, including Pokémon games from Gen 1-7, onto your CFW 3DS. The information is a compilation of references and guides I’ve collected during my own efforts of 3DS modding. This is something I wish I had when I started down this process, and I hope you find it useful. I’ve combed through this sub to try and compile every question answered in one place.
This is mostly focused on the Pokémon games, but I’ve reworked it to explain how to install any game from Gameboy to 3DS onto your Home Screen, and you can skip the info that’s just for Pokémon games. It covers a wide variety of topics related to 3DS CFW modding, and I think even those who don’t care about Pokémon would find it useful.
Comment any questions or if anything is incorrect/out of date.

Note: This assumes you have already completed the CFW 3DS guide on your 3DS. This will not work without completing that process.

Part 1: Useful Tools & Sources

This guide makes reference to the same handful of resources. They are listed here:

• H Shop. How to install
  
• GodMode9 - this should already be installed on your 3DS if you followed the CFW guide
  
• How to rip game cartridges via GodMode9. Video about it.
  
• Turn any rom into a CIA file via New Super Ultimate Injector 3DS, an application that allows you to inject Nes, Snes, GameBoy, GameBoy Color, GameBoy Advance, Mega Drive, Game Gear and TurbiGrafx 16 roms in to the 3DS.
  
• Use the FBI app to scan QR codes and download games that way. Only works for 3DS games and VC’s, not NDS games.
  

Part 2: How to get every game on your Home Screen

Gameboy & Gameboy Color - Gen 1 & 2 (RBY/GSC)

• Download virtual consoles through the Hshop in the “Virtual Console - Region Free” section. Here is the list of NA VC games), though the HShop does have every other region as well. GDrive of VC’s
  
• Don’t forget to also download the originals! Japanese Red and Green VC’s are also in the HShop. You can’t miss this nightmare fuel!
  
  • Japanese Pokémon Green is called “[GB]ポケットモンスター 緑” in the “Virtual Console - Region Free” section of the HShop.
  • Japanese Pokémon Red is called “[GB]ポケットモンスター 赤” in the “Virtual Console - Region Free” section of the HShop.
• Alternatively, if you want to get other games, track down the Roms (internet archive, Vimm, etc), and use the “New Super Ultimate Injector 3DS” linked above.
  

Gameboy Advance - Gen 3 (RSE/FRLE)

• Download Pokémon CIA’s here, put them in your CIA folder on your SD card, and install them in the FBI app. Alternate source with some custom roms as well.
  
• Alternatively, scan the QR codes in FBI.
  
• Alternatively, if you want to get other games, track down the Roms (internet archive, Vimm, etc), and use the “New Super Ultimate Injector 3DS” linked above. Or search for “[Name of game] CIA file” on Google
  

Nintendo DS - Gen 4 & 5 (DPPt/HGSS/BWB2W2)

1. Download roms or rip your cartridges via GodMode9, put them in the correct rom folders. Roms available at Internet Archive; google “Internet Archive Roms”. Some are here
   
2. Use NDSForwarder OR just open the Universal Updater app and you can find it in there (there's two different ones, I'd use the one by MechanicalDragon)
   
3. Put DS games in /ROMS/NDS.
   

Note: Do not rename the file after you’ve installed forwarders as that will break them. Also: LIMIT 40 DS GAMES INSTALLED AT A TIME - You can however use the data management menu to move the shortcuts you aren't using to the SD card to make room (where they disappear from the home screen and become unusable till they are moved back)

1. Open the app via homebrew launcher to select which to install to your homescreen, and you may uninstall them one by one through the main 3DS data management menu, the DSiWare section.

Source

• Alternatively you can use YANBF, which I’ve never tried but doesn’t have the 40 game limit.
  
• Alternatively, you can use TwilightMenu++, which is an application for the DS&DSLite (via the r4 flashcart) or the DSi/3DS (via CFW). When opened, it looks and functions like the DSi menu. It allows you to access and play Roms via a prettier interface. However, I don’t like using it on the 3DS. If yours is broken, try downloading it again from the Universal Updater app or try this.
  

3DS - Gen 6 & 7 (XY/ORAS/SMUSUM/Dream Radar)

• Download games from the HShop. Every 3DS game should be available. Don’t forget Dream Radar!
  
• Alternatively, Rip the game from the cartridge via GodMode9
  
• Alternatively, scan the QR codes in FBI
  

Note: Be sure to download the updates to each game as well, if needed.

Custom Romhacks & Randomizers

• Turn any rom into a CIA file via New Super Ultimate Injector 3DS
  
• Randomizer help here. 3DS games
  
• More Randomizer Stuff.
  

Part 3: How to migrate saves into 3DS

Note: Always backup your save files via Checkpoint and back up the SD card to your computer regularly.

Reference. Reference 2
Gameboy & Gameboy Color:

• rip save from the cartridge via the Epilogue GB Operator
  
• inject save via Godmode 9 or Checkpoint. source
  

Gameboy Advance

• Rip from cartridge via a DS, DS Lite, or GameCube
  
• Alternatively, rip from cartridge via the Epilogue GB Operator
  
• Migrate via Godmode 9
  

Nintendo DS

1. Rip saves from cartridge via GodMode 9
   
2. wherever you store your rom files, there should be a folder labeled saves.
   
3. Copy the .sav to roms/nds/saves/ and name it the same as the ROM but with the “.sav” extension instead of “.nds”
   

3DS

• Rip from cartridge via GodMode9 & inject into digital version
  
• Alternatively, use Checkpoint:
  

 1. put physical copy into 3DS 2. open up checkpoint, select the cartridge version, back up the save and name it something obvious 3. remove the cartridge 4. select the digital version of the game you backed up and then pick the save you just made a back up of and click “restore save”. 

Part 4: How to cheat/hack

1. Checkpoint

Note: Cannot access GBA or NDS games, only 3DS and original VC games. See “2. PKSM” and “3. NDSForwarder” below for instructions on how to cheat in those games. Checkpoint causes the game to crash often, especially in gen 6&7. Always save before activating a cheat.

2. PKSM 3DS App - Pokemon Games Only

• Every Generation of Pokémon, 1-7, can be integrated into PKSM
  
• Gen 3: How to get the GBA VC game into PKSM:
  

1. Load the game and save first. Doesn’t work without a save file. 2. get ahold of your Title ID by going to FBI → Titles → take a picture of your relevant Title ID for the game you need. 3. in PKSM, go to settings (hit X) and go to Misc → Title ID’s 4. input your title ID for your specific game from step 1 5. Once you’ve inputted the number and hit ok, you can just keep hitting B. You’ll see the game on the VC list and access it like the other games. [Source](https://github.com/FlagBrew/PKSM/wiki/Basics#virtual-console-games). [Source 2](https://www.reddit.com/3dspiracy/comments/13cbwjwhy_wont_pksm_accept_my_save_files_for_gen_3/jjf6iof/). 

• Gen 3 - GBA event items
  
  • When you're in the Scripts menu in PKSM, press X to swap to SD-based scripts, and Y to swap to universal scripts. There is a script called “RSEFrLg - Inject Tickets.c”. Inject that.
• Gen 4-5: How to get PKSM to work for NDS games.
  

1. in PKSM, go to settings (hit x) → misc. → Extra Saves → find your save for your specific game within your SD card. For generation 4-5, it’s probably in /ROMs/nds/saves 2. go back to the main PKSM screen, then hit Y, then choose your save to open. 

Source. Source 2. Source 3

3. NDSForwarder (DS games only): hold Y while loading the game then press X.
4. PKHeX Desktop App - Pokémon Games Only

• Legality checking and fixing with PKHeX and RNGReporter

5. TwilightMenu++ (DS games only)

• You might need to download the “NDS(i) Cheat Database” from the Universal Updator app. I’m not sure. I found that and installed it before testing if TM++ already had cheats.
  
• While hovering over a game in TwilightMenu++, click Y, then X.
  

6. Pokémon Dream Radar!
Don’t forget, there is also a 3DS game that can interact with the other 3DS games called Pokémon Dream Radar, available in the HStore. From what I’ve seen, it sucks. But there is a tool called “Pokémon Dream Radar portable save editor” available in the Universal Updater app that allows you to hack your game. I’ve never tried it because the game looks awful. But it can migrate Pokémon to Bank so we can’t forget it.

Part 5: How to migrate Pokémon up and down generations:

1. PKSM lets you migrate Pokémon into the application, then out of it into a different game. You can migrate Pokémon to and from any game, Gen 1-7. Basic guide here.

 * See Part 4 PKSM section for how to set up different games in PKSM. * PKSM Legality Checking: Go to the “edit Pokémon” screen → Click “misc.” → click the wireless icon. Requires a network connection to work. [Source](https://github.com/FlagBrew/PKSM/issues/1055). [Edit the Pokémon to make it legal](https://github.com/FlagBrew/PKSM/wiki/Editor). 

Note: migrating Pokémon from newer to older games may result in some data changing, such as a Pokémon’s gender, ability, or moveset.

2. The legit way: Pal Park, Poke Transporter, Pokémon Bank, & Pokémon Home

• It is safe to use both PKBank & PKTransporter on a hacked 3DS. You can still transfer Pokémon from Bank to Home and then to Switch games. Download them via the HStore or download here.

Note: Worried about updating your 3DS? Follow this guide.
Note 2: you must have a Gen 6/7 game installed and progressed up to the point of accessing a PC before first using Pokémon Bank
Note 3: you can transfer from Bank to Home, even if your accounts are different on your 3DS and Switch. Use a moving key. You do need a premium Pokémon Home account.

• Poke Transporter can transport Pokémon from Gen 1 & 2 VC’s as well as from Gen 5 into Pokémon Bank. They will only be able to migrate from Bank to Gen 7 games, or 1 way into Pokémon Home. You can migrate Pokémon this way, and then send them back down from Gen 7 into older games via PKSM.
  
• How to use PokeTransporter on Rom files of Gen 5 games
  

 1. Load the save into PKSM 2. Go to Scripts → Universal 3. Find the Transporter Redirect script & run it. 

Note: only works for Gen 5 games Source. Alternate method.

• You can also use Checkpoint to backup your game, migrate Pokémon from the game into Bank, then restore from the Checkpoint backup so you can keep them in the 3DS game and send them up to Home. Or clone them in PKSM. Both methods work just as good.
  
• Gen 3 to 4: You cannot migrate from Gen 3 to Gen 4 via the Pal Park with your 3DS, You must use PKSM or PKHeX. However, it is possible to use the pal park via Roms on a DS/DSLite. PKSM is far easier and faster.
  
• Gen 4 to Gen 5: Migrating via Poke-Transfer and Roms/original carts should work. However, it requires 2 DS’s/3DS’s. PKSM is far easier and faster.
  

3. Trading to legit games

• Gen 1-2: Yes. You can trade in Gens 1 & 2 VC’s from HStore with legit VC copies on other 3DS’s.
  
  • Alternatively, you could also trade if your Roms are on an EZ Flash and you connect it to original Gameboy hardware & link cables. Or via Roms directly in an Analogue Pocket.
• Gen 3: Tragically, No Source 1. Source 2. Source 3. I hope someone figures out how to get that to work because it’d be cool.
  
  • Alternatively, you could trade if your Roms are on an EZ Flash and you connect it to original Gameboy Advance hardware & link cables. Or via Roms directly in an Analogue Pocket.
• Gen 4-5: YES
  
• Gen 6-7: Yes
  

4. PKHeX Desktop App: I’ve never used PKHex before but I found a guide here
5. PKMN Chest can also work, though it works better on a DS/DSLite/DSi. It cannot access 3DS games, so no gen 6 or 7. Nor can it access Virtual Console games, like how it was instructed you install gen 1-3 above. It can access non-virtual console roms if you’ve installed them on the 3DS a different way. So at most you could access gens 1-5.

Part 6: bonus fun stuff not necessarily related to Pokémon that I wanted to share

• PS1 & N64 emulators on 3DS
  
• Amiibo Emulation - Wumiibo. Note: There are no mainline Pokémon games with Amiibo support
  
• Fantastic YouTubers that talk about emulation, hardware hacking, roms, retro hardware, etc. I tried to integrate their videos in this guide wherever I could but here are my favorite channels…
  
  • Retro Game Corps
  • Wulff Den
  • The Retro Future
  • Scott the Woz yes I just discovered him recently. Sorry.
  • Odd Tinkering

^{Edit: formatting and clarification}

​
One rider descended the birch strewn hill on a chestnut stallion, slow. Batseai puffed on his cigar, a fist pressed into his thigh the other arm outstretched, and on it perched his hawk. He guided his horse with his hips without needing to think. On his leather saddle hung, a couple rabbit’s, two quivers of full of arrows, two composite bows a short spear and a curved axe. Where his saddle was equipped for death, the rider was more equipped for a beautiful day, it was peacetime after all. He was dressed lightly with bright green cloth, the shapes of clouds sewn into his sleeves. He took a moment to bask under the long blue sky that shot out above him, a crisp spring day, he could almost taste it.
Horns blared ahead of him.
He stared down the stone castle, the thatched homes beneath it and its high walls.
A life of growing grain, consuming it and shitting it out all in a radius of less than a mile. For a man who lived on a horse it was a still puzzling thing to see. A motionless life, where being alive seemed to be just an unremarkable coincidence to these people.
Though this monotony of peacetime was a dam better sight than dealing with mailed axeman swinging for his horse and thighs or trolls clubbing a comrade to death.
From the fields of grain surrounding it all, hundreds of peasants skittered away like field mice to get through the gate before it closed, some stumbling off their feet at the sight of him.
Batseai smirked
‘’Am I that ugly?’ He asked the hawk. Rubbing his shaggy blond moustache and flicking his long shoulder length braid. It was more of a rhetorical question, but the hawk cawed ‘That’s kind of you to say comrade Mutu, here’
Batseai reached into his decorated green lamellar looking for scraps. He fed a morsel of burnt rabbit into the birds sharp beak, then flung it up in the air before it could swallow, Mutu took flight looping high, but dutifully did not veer away from Batseai.
Watch over me. Batseai gripped the reigns of his horse. He broke into a canter. Towards the screams of families and shouts of readying soldiers.
By the time he could see their faces it was dead quiet.
He slowed not far from the closed oak gate within firing range, eyeing the bowmen, close to 40 he reckoned, hate in their eyes, but not a shot fired.
‘A good morning to you’ he said taking the cigar out of his mouth, a couple men twitched at hearing their own tongue from a nomadic looking rider.
A seemingly rhetorical statement, the town seemed to stare back.
Batseai petted his horse in the silence.
‘What do you want?’ he heard a breathless shout from an older man not in military gear, having just run down from the castle Batseai guessed. The Nomad’s green eyes snapped onto the high stone towers.
‘To whom am I speaking, are you the lord of this settlement?’
‘I am a steward for his lordship, I speak on his behalf’
‘good, so your lord is in then’
‘My lordship is busy, What do you want!? The steward repeated
‘A life of my choosing and to abide my suffering nobly I suppose, and you comrade?’ A couple other soldiers glanced at each other hearing their tongue spoken back to them more and more eloquently.
‘The peace treaty stated that there would be no raiders on our lands. You are in breach of your people’s contract. I warn you we are ready to defend ourselves until you’re all in the mud!’ the old man shouted down, shaking with unbecoming rage.
Batseai frowned turning to look behind him, in a bag on his saddle, amongst his horse’s mane, down his lamellar vest.
‘Where are these raiders comrade? I am but one man. I am simply in need of a good hour’s rest in your town and a word with your lordship or indeed yourself’
‘You’re not welcome vermin of the Steppe!’ he heard one of the bowman shout before being hissed to be quiet.
His eyes shot to him in an instant a young looking man consumed with naive rage. Batseai smirked and spat tobacco towards the wall, he heard the bowstrings becoming taught.
‘If we are vermin. You’re fathers were well defeated by vermin. If I am vermin, I’m vermin whose name you know. I am Batseai Iron Tongue of the Veulen tribe, general of the Freemen of the Steppe, from the land of nine tongues, victor in the wars against the Kingdoms of Novguru, victor of the battle of Pellem, it is my name on that treaty that lets you wake in the morning, you owe me for the air you breath boy, it is a generous gift, but I am willing to have confiscated!’ He let the words hit the line of dozens of men ‘I am very welcome here, to your vanquished lands, as it says in the treaty, open the gate.’
The lines of soldiers looked at one each other uneasy. The senior looking man squinted down, anger gone from his face ‘any man can say they are Batseai Iron Tongue, Batseai leads a Horde’
‘I led a horde in a time of war. Unless I am mistaken we are no longer at war and you have no reason to bar your doors to traveller. Any man can say they are me to be sure. But they would be bold to do it. You know when they called me Iron Tongue surely?’ The nomad’s horse shook its mane
‘well he…’
‘A rhetorical question comrade!’ Batseai snapped ‘It is because my words are more true than any arrow, than any spear. My words are what caused slaughter of Pellem where the fields are still pink from fifty thousand of your felled men. So, I choose my next words, like all words, carefully, for they are binding and they are true. If you do not open your gate, I will fight my way in until I am felled. My people, know where I rode too and if I do not return, word of my passing will spread. A horde will gather once more and your kingdoms will become ash in the wind. Now let me in, there is something I wish to discuss. Or kill me and find out if my words are iron at the expense of your children’
‘Why do you ride alone then if you are Batseai?’ The steward persisted.
‘One cannot rule from horseback in times of peace. Open the gate’
Batseai clicked and put his cigar back in his mouth, savouring the sweet taste. His horse proceeded to the gate. He felt bows follow his steps. He waited there, gave a quick prayer to the sky father, or whoever would listen.

Hey all! Let me start by saying that I'm an idiot. I know this. So if you're going to read all this just to tell me that I'm an idiot, I want you to know that I know! Now with that out of the way...
I bought a Fisker Karma. Nay, I bought two Fisker Karmas. I bought one sight unseen and shortly after that, the same seller stated that the guy that encouraged him to buy one also had one. Neither car was running. This is a common issue with the Fiskers. The 12v battery dies and the car needs a special Fisker computer to wake up. They were cheap and my hope was to fix both and sell one. I was taking a risk and I knew this.
I paid to have the cars shipped cross country to San Francisco where one of the prominent Fisker techs is located. I gave him instructions: see if the cars are easily revived. If not, send me a list of what they need. This is November of 2022. He proceeds to tell me that one car is completely hopeless but that he thinks he can bring the other car back to life and scavenge some parts from the other car. He sends me a $6,000ish quote for the battery service. I green light this and we're off to the races.
There was an understanding that if, and only if, the car was viable and the battery was working as designed, that we would then perform a litany of other work. Some of this was stuff that you should do on a higher mileage car (control arm bushings, tie-rods) and other stuff is Fisker specific. The infotainment computers fail due to water intrusion. That's $3000. The heater pumps fail, the gear selector buttons, etc. They perform an entire cowl sealing that makes the car water proof because Fisker failed to do this from the factory. But here's the bottom line: I made it clear that if we didn't have a viable powertrain/ battery that no further work was to be carried out. I bet you can see where this is going.
Likewise, I relied on them wholly for telling me what needed to be repaired. The only problem I was already aware of was a defective blower motor (also water intrusion) which I replaced myself upon taking possession of the vehicle.
At this point they explain that the battery has been tested and is no longer displaying any codes. They ask if I want to do the remainder of the suggested service. This is about $6000 of additional work and includes replacing a door switch, tie rods, control arm bushings, the infotainment computer, sealing the cowl area, windshield wipers, a few broken under trays, etc. I gave them the go ahead and they perform the work. The car is done, my bill is paid and a few weeks after failing to find a shipper, I hop on a train to go get the car from San Francisco.
I'm leaving my hotel the next morning to get the car when the owner texts and tells me to get breakfast if I haven't already. The car has a check engine light and they want to figure out why. That's annoying but hey, it happens. I show up a few hours later and they explain that it has a cam correlation code. The cam phasers fail in the engines. It's an easy enough fix. It sucks that they didn't find that but my day's not ruined. What's odd is that my last Fisker had this exact problem and I know it takes at least two drive cycles for it to display the light and yet they tell me the light was never on. So that means the phaser decided to fail that day? Unlikely but ok.
Then they tell me about the traction control light. It turns on the moment you start to drive. "It never came on for us" was the official response. I've put 1500 miles on the car now. It's come on literally every time but once. It came on for them too. I'm sure of it. They just missed it. But still, I'm assuming a wheel sensor or something like that needs to be replaced. Again not the end of the world. I'm not upset at this point.
So now I start driving the car back to LA and almost immediately I notice that I'm losing throttle response in EV mode. Now I'm not talking after driving hundreds of miles or having the car for a couple weeks. I'm saying this happened on my drive home less than 50 miles in. You hit the gas pedal and the car does nothing. You have to put it in sport mode which starts the engine and bypasses the battery and then it drives fine. I assume I'm doing something wrong because surely there can't be a major issue with this car I just paid $12,000 to one of the top techs in the country to work on. If this is the battery, it's a major oversight and I assume I just have a mode setting wrong or there's a dead spot in the throttle.
I live with it for a few days and notice the problem only occurs in EV mode. That's not good. That means something with the battery most likely. This, combined with the fact that they missed the check engine light, traction control light and then I'm finding that the heater pump and the electric heater for EV mode heat are both dead, means they really put nearly no shakedown miles on this. They didn't verify it was a functioning car. They barely drove it after changing the bad battery modules and clearly didn't drive it more than once. Otherwise the check engine light would have popped up for the engine code. Indeed, I looked at the mileage and the car had something like 60 miles put on it in their possession. The all EV range of the Karma is 50 miles. That's one discharge and an additional 10 miles. I couldn't even discharge the battery the first time I drove it without experiencing the lose of power issue.
So I'm back in LA now and I call them. I'm not sure what to do. Because I'm really upset that they a.) missed a lot of issues and b.) barely put any shakedown miles on the vehicle. Clearly not enough to see that it still had issues. But I also need their help.
So they tell me to check the coolant pumps. I do. They're running. They tell me to bring it back to them. I do. They charge me another $1700 to replace a contactor in the battery and tell me that it's still having the issue. They say the traction control light hasn't come on for them but that they performed a steering angle reset procedure. I go to pick up the car yesterday. I move it 4 feet out of the spot and the traction control light comes on. I'm livid but swallowing my anger at this point.
I'm now $15,000+ in parts and labor into a car that doesn't work fully. The shop has offered effectively nothing other than a "we're sorry" for missing the stuff that they missed. There's no explanation for missing the battery issues other than that it didn't do it for them. Well of course it didn't. You didn't drive it enough.
I'm angry because so much of the work didn't need to be done if the battery didn't work. I didn't need the $1600 control arms or the $1000 tie rod ends. I didn't need the $3000 computer, the $665 gear selector switch, an oil change, under trays... any of it. I paid for another $7,000ish worth of work that absolutely did not need to be done if the battery was not viable. Not to mention all the stuff they missed beyond the battery. The heater pump and EV heater weren't noticed, the traction control light never mentioned to me, the check engine light, etc... Just a bunch of really obvious stuff here that was missed and I never even got the opportunity to say yes or no to have those things fixed.
And my struggle is that these guys are very kind. They are a family business with exceptional reviews. But I feel as if they really took advantage of me here, just with a smile on their faces and a kind demeanor. Even the return trip where they were supposed to find the issue they missed the first time, they charged me $1700. If the part didn't fix the problem, I would have removed it and done the labor for free because I severely inconvenienced my customer in the first place. This wasn't even a consideration for them.
Am I nuts here? I feel as if it's their fault I paid for the extra $7,000 worth of work and I'd like at least some of that back. I realize these stories have two sides. I've really done my best to be objective and just lay out facts here and these facts are accurate. With that in mind, am I justified in my anger?
FULL DISCLOSURE: This company let me purchase battery modules directly from the company they get them from at a large discount but they would not warranty them. That said, they are not stating that these modules are the cause of my existing failure. In fact, they are unable to say what my existing failure is at all. They're basically throwing parts at the car.

I have been 7 years with my boyfriend and we have had a very happy relationship until now. We live together and have always been a very happy couple, I have never cheated on him and I know he hasn’t. We are somehow different and have never had a “butterflies in the stomach” passionate relationship, however I always thought feeling calm next to him was a green flag and sign of a healthy relationship.
Since moving together to a different country after uni we have missed having a circle of friends and felt a bit lonely, especially during covid. Recently however a close friend (M27) we had lost touch with moved to the city we live in and we started going out with him and his girlfriend and doing more things, there is a nice atmosphere and we all feel like we are back to uni again.
The problem is that we are often in each other flats and this way I often see his flatmate (M28). It was just a couple of days after the first time I met him that I realized I had a giant crush on him.
I feel terrible because I have never had a crush since I have been with my boyfriend. It has now been several months and I still cannot think about anything else every single day. We have similar interests (much more than my boyfriend and I) and he checks almost every personality trait of what I think my dream man would be. I have always found very difficult to find boys I really liked and never thought I would find someone I like that much. Despite the fact that my relationship doesn’t have any apparent problem, for the first time it made me think I might have settled too early with my boyfriend.
I can see my crush is also very attracted to me and we often exchange long meaningful secret gazes while we are together. A few times our knees pressed for good half hours under the table and lately we have both started dropping hints to the fact that we like each other but cannot be together disguised in the conversation. Except once, I have only ever seen him when my boyfriend was also present. That one time we were out with our common friend one day that my boyfriend was out of town. He said something even more explicit than usual about being into me but still disguised, my friend didn’t notice as he was absorbed telling us about his own girlfriend. That evening my friend had to be home early and we almost decided to go somewhere else without him. In the end I chickened out because I thought we would have had other opportunities and because I knew something would happen had we been alone. Now I deeply regret having missed the opportunity as I have never had other chances to see him without my boyfriend present later.
My crush is seeing a girl that is his first serious relationship ever. However, I cannot help feeling he is maybe not 100% committed to her considering how he acts towards me. He is known to be very shy with girls and definetely not the player type and I have heard it has been very hard for him to find a girlfriend in the past. Wishful thinking I know but I keep thinking he has also “settled” for the first girl who returned his feelings (don’t think it was his first first but surely the first relationship as such).
I am afraid to leave my boyfriend because it would leave me with zero close friend in a city is not my own. It is one of those places where it’s very difficult to know new people and I am on the shy side. However I also cannot keep on lying to him and stay with him while I like someone else… our relationship didn’t have any problems but is also not the same since I have met my crush. I am drawn to spend more time with my crush but cannot find any occasion to ‘naturally’ spend time alone with him and get to know him so I can understand if it’s just a crush or something deeper. I am ok ending up alone if it needs to be but I don’t want to find myself in the situation where I leave my boyfriend and then my crush rejects me as it would be too painful. I would rather work how I feel for my crush first.
The story is much longer than this and I could add so much more detail but this post is so long already! This is the first time I tell this to a living soul as if I tell to someone I know it would get too real.
Should I leave my boyfriend now and do you have any advice on how I could make up my mind and find more clarity without getting too hurt in the process?

This is Part 2 of this write-up. Please read part 1 first. This is the link:
https://www.reddit.com/UnresolvedMysteries/comments/143r7l9/felix_vail_the_pedophile_serial_killer_caught/

PART 2:

ANNETTE CRAVER:

Born on the 7th of December 1965, Annette Craver was intelligent and creative. At 15 she was a singer-songwriter and in her senior year at a private school that specialized in medicine. Her dream was to become a midwife.
http://charleyproject.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/vail_annette6.jpg(A photo of Annette Craver.)
In the summer of 1981, she and her mother, Mary Rose greeted people at a friend’s yard sale in the Montrose neighborhood in Houston, Texas. They had just returned from a vacation in Mexico, and Annette felt heartsick, still infatuated with a boy named Adolfo, who was unable to join her in America.
VAIL MEETS ANNETTE
While people browsed the sale, Vail pulled up on a motorcycle and spoke with Annette. He was 41 and had done some carpentry work in the area. “When I saw her, I thought, ‘That’s going to be my new girlfriend,’” he said about the 15-year-old.
In April 1982, Rose and her daughter invested in a Tulsa home that had a rental cottage behind it. Rose began renovating both. After graduating from high school, Annette joined her mother in Tulsa. Vail appeared a few days later, and convinced Annette to leave with him on his motorcycle. They lived off the $500-a-month Social Security check that she received from her father’s death 3 years prior. It would be over a year before Mary Rose would see her daughter again.
That fall, Annette (who was still 15) would fall pregnant, and Vail would force her to have a painful abortion.
Jerry Woodall, reportedly friends with Vail later recalled an embarrassing scene, where the 42-year-old Vail was in a sleeping bag, having public sex with a 16-year-old Annette, only 20 feet away from him and his then-wife Meredith McMackin. Annette grinned and waved at them. Woodall and McMackin did their best to ignore them.
McMackin would later say that Vail had “this coldness and controlling aspect to his personality. Annette was so open and alive, but I think he just totally dominated her. He would try to convey that he was this higher form of being. At first, I thought maybe he was evolved, but then I realized it was this arrogant act.”
Later that summer, police in California would arrest Vail for violating probation a dozen years earlier. Annette telephoned Woodall, who gave her $200. After Vail walked free from prison, he and Annette decided to get married. However, as a 17-year-old she needed permission.
Annette told her mother that she loved Vail, that they were already “spiritually married” and that they would travel to Mexico and get married there if she refused. Not wanting to lose her daughter completely, Rose said OK.
On August 15th, 1983, in Bakersfield, California, the couple were wed.
AFTER THE MARRIAGE
Four months after the marriage, Annette turned 18, allowing her to collect more than $98,000 ($293,500 today) from life insurance policies on her late father. Accompanied by Vail, she withdrew all the money in cash from a San Antonio bank. She bought a Fiat convertible that Vail liked and paid for his dental work.
In April 1984, Rose returned home to find Annette waiting at her door. She told her she wanted to divorce Vail, and enroll in college. She talked about Vail’s temper, including an incident where he had broken his hand trying to punch his wife. He missed and hit a wall.
A few weeks later, Vail showed up. The couple fought constantly, and Vail left after a few days. Mary Rose said that Vail was “insanely jealous” and would become furious when Annette spoke of her desire to go out with younger men.
She and Annette worked on renovating the two homes after Vail left, enjoying their time together. The 2 even started a garden together.
Annette received a letter from Vail, who vowed their time apart would fuel their love. He wrote to her: “After we hung up, I went out to a park and ran and hung and talked with God and smoked some and shot some pool and rode with the top down out through the marsh playing ‘Iron Butterfly’ [“In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida”] and bathing every inch of your body-spirit being with love.”
He referred to being away from Annette as “deprivation jail” and to her ego as “his jailor.”
“The idea of her cutting away ego’s “feeder roots and creating roots between your spirit and the cosmic ground of loving makes me hot for you. My mind is kissing you everywhere.”
After that, Vail would return to Annette’s life. Rose said, “Annette told me, ‘Felix is the wisest person in the world, and I can’t make decisions without him.’” His influence on Annette had only grown stronger. According to Rose, she even compared Vail to God, a comparison Vail agreed with.
After this, the couple angrily insisted that Rose move out and deed the house to Annette. Accompanied by suicidal thoughts brought on by Vail’s continued control over her daughter, Rose left for California to stay with family and friends, deeding the house to Annette for $7000 ($21,000 today) before she did.
Annette would add Vail to the deed, and a month later had deeded him both homes, leaving him as the sole owner.
ANNETTE’S DISAPPEARANCE
Mere weeks after deeding the houses to Vail, the couple told neighbors they were leaving on vacation. When Vail returned in October, he was alone.
Vail told a neighbor that Annette had a lot of money wither her when he’d left her, and that she was likely visiting friends in Denver.
Upon learning that Annette hadn’t come back with Vail, Mary Rose called him. “He told me that while they were camping, Annette had a sexual dream about being with other men in Mexico, and she wanted to go there,” she recalled to an investigative reporter years later. “He claimed that the dream made them both realize that she should have her freedom.” The next day, Vail told her he had put Annette on a bus with $50,000 ($150,000 today) but didn't elaborate.
On Oct 22, 1984, Rose filed a missing person’s report. She told the Tulsa Police Department that each person who spoke with Vail “gets a different story about the amount of money that Annette took with her and where she might be. We all believe that he knows where she is or has done something with her.”
On January 22, 1985, Detective Dennis Davis and another officer questioned Vail at his home (This is obscenely late to start questioning him). By this point, Vail had filed for divorce, citing an inability to find her after a “diligent search.” Davis said her mother, Mary Rose, mentioned her daughter had received more than $90,000 from her father’s estate. Vail confirmed this was true, saying the couple had spent much of that money traveling in foreign countries. He said they kept their money in cash because they didn’t trust banks and that he had found about $10,000 in cash when he returned home.
The next day, Vail called a lawyer, who promised to talk with the officers and tell them to “leave me alone,” as he wrote in his journal.
When Davis returned five days later, Vail had a detailed alibi: The couple left Tulsa between noon and 3 p.m. on Sept. 13, 1984, and stayed the night in a hotel in Claremont, Oklahoma. After two nights of camping on the river, Annette woke up and told Vail she had decided to leave him. He took her to the Trailways Bus Station in St. Louis and left before she bought the ticket. (There is no Trailways Bus Station in St. Louis, and there has never been a Trailways Bus Station in St. Louis.)
He told the officers that she had told him she was headed for Denver, where she planned to get a fake ID card and leave for Mexico. When asked if he would take a lie detector test, Vail said no.
After Davis left, he wrote a letter to Rose. He blamed her for the “bad things” about Annette, told her that after the couple had returned from Costa Rica Annette had been “seeing friends and relatives --- completing her relationships with them for the purpose of getting ready to drop everybody and start over.” He wrote that Annette “disappeared herself from you” because Rose kept imposing her “value system” on her, and said Annette viewed her mother, grandmother, and herself as “zero self-image whores for approval.”
He explained the 2 had no plans to communicate, he did not know where she was, and that “I also assure you that even if I did know, I would not tell you.”
When Rose returned to Tulsa in April 1985, she entered the cottage Annette used to live in, only to find almost all the young woman’s belongings were gone, including her clothes and her diary.
Inside a Barbie suitcase, Rose found a photograph of her daughter and several of her identification cards. She also located things that Annette had written, including a Feb. 17, 1984, note that contradicted Vail’s claim that the couple had spent most of her inheritance on their travel to Mexico and Central American countries.
Instead, the note detailed how they used the money to buy the Fiat, pay off all of Vail’s loans, and deposit $36,000 into Louisiana Savings. It said that as of that day, they had $41,600 ($125,000 today) in cash.
Rose shared the information with the police. Detective Davis showed up again, and Vail told Davis the couple divided the money into smaller cashier’s checks, contradicting his earlier statement that they kept the money in cash.
After a while, Davis left, and despite the (seemingly obvious) suspicious behavior of Vail, closed the missing person’s case.
AFTER ANNETTE’S DISAPPEARANCE
Rose kept calling Vail after this and was finally able to reach him on September 14th 1985.
When asked about Annette’s whereabouts he refused to tell her.
When asked about Annette’s missing clothes he said he gave them to charity.
When asked about the insurance money, Vail told her ‘That’s all she really cared about.’ Rose hung up.
Two years later, fed up with the lack of progress in Annette’s case, Rose would return to Tulsa. She spent thousands of dollars on private investigators to locate Vail. When that failed, she simply went and found him herself.
Tipped off that he was staying at someone’s house, she went there with a friend and found him sitting outside. When asked where Annette went, he replied “Mexico.” When asked where in Mexico, he said the 2 had made a pact to contact each other every 5 years, contradicting his statement that the 2 didn’t have plans to communicate. Rose didn’t believe a word of it.
The whole time Vail never looked up, never stood up and never looked her in the eye.
BETH FIELD
Some time after this, Vail began dating Beth Field. Soon the couple had began arguing, and Vail would call her a “whore.” During a December 1987 argument, he would strike her so hard he ruptured her ear drum. She told Vail there was no justification for violence, to which he responded, “If you quit behaving like a whore, I’ll quit hitting you.”
In August 1988 Beth received a call from Rose, sharing details about the disappearance of her daughter, Annette. From that point forward, Field said she began to examine Vail’s words more closely, realizing that he had likely murdered her.
Four months after the call, he entered her home unannounced. Already drunk, he accused her of “imagined promiscuity,” according to a court order. He slapped her, struck her, and threw her across the bedroom. She asked if Vail was going to kill her, to which Vail replied, “It depends on what you tell me.”
A judge gave her a protective order, requiring Vail to keep his distance. Two weeks later, the sheriff reported that Vail was nowhere to be found.
While Field was visiting a meditation center in Texas in 1990, Vail arrived. After composing herself, she told him “There is a part of you that goes off, and it’s sick and it’s dangerous.”
He looked at her and asked, “Really?” She said “yes, really.” This time, the message seemed to go through. Vail left the next day, and with a single exception about five years later, she never saw him again.
MARY ROSE LEARNS ABOUT THE OTHER 2 CASES
In the summer of 1991 (6 years after Annette's disappearance), Rose drove over 2000 miles to Canyon Lake, Texas to speak to Sue Jordan, Felix Vail’s sister. Jordan said that Vail had told her that Annette wanted to leave, that he took her to a bus station and that she left with some Mexican men, heading for Mexico. Jordan also mentioned that Vail’s first wife had drowned, which was news to Rose.
Before she left, Jordan also told her, “Oh, you know, there was another woman that disappeared. I remember her mother calling my mother for years, checking to see if they’d heard from her. I think her name was Sharon.”
After the conversation, Rose sat down at a typewriter, writing every word she could remember. She also called the public library in Lake Charles.
The librarian remembered the 1962 drowning of Vail’s first wife, Mary Horton. She told Rose that he had taken out life insurance policies on his wife prior to her drowning and that the insurance companies were suspicious and didn’t pay the full value. The librarian made copies of newspaper articles and mailed them to her.
After reading them, Rose reached out to Mary’s family in Louisiana, speaking to Will Horton. He shared her suspicions about Vail and a copy of the 1971 National Enquirer article made after Vail's son Bill reported him to the police. When she read it, she learned that Sharon’s last name was Hensley.
In 1994, she read in the newspaper about Dolores Strehlow’s disappearance from Medford, Oregon, seven years earlier. Police had just arrested her husband, thanks to the work of Detective Terry Newell. She contacted Newell, who helped her find the family of Sharon Hensley. When Rose dialed the Hensley family, Sharon’s mother, Peggy, answered. Rose asked if Peggy knew a Felix Vail. Peggy replied with "you bet I do"
THE INVESTIGATION HEATS UP… AND COOLS DOWN
The detective who helped Rose before, Terry Newell, contacted Jim Bell, a national expert in serial killings working for the FBI. When Rose talked with Bell, she felt like she'd finally gotten somewhere. He was interested in working on the Vail case if he could swing the time. He still remained busy with active serial killer cases, helping train task forces across the U.S. Vail’s son, Bill, told Rose that he was willing to testify, as long as authorities provided protection to his family. Both the Tulsa police and the district attorney’s office in Lake Charles revived their investigations into Vail, now considered a suspected serial killer.
Bell suggested the victims’ families gather with authorities at the FBI Academy in Quantico, Virginia, to share information on Vail. He was unable to work on the case and left the FBI in 1995. The meeting in Quantico never materialized, and the cases involving Vail grew cold once again.
A QUICK RUN DOWN OF EVENTS
In the fall of 1997, family and friends held a mural for Annette.
Diagnosed with esophageal cancer, Vail’s son Bill heard from doctors that he didn’t have long to live. He’s quoted saying “now I’ll get to be with my mom.” Months before passing away in 2009, Bill talked about his father in a recorded interview with his pastor at Grace Church in Overland Park, Kansas.
On Jan. 3, 2009, Bill died, and Vail wrote in his journal, “I feel a large empty hole in my being where his life presence has been for 47 years,” before writing about getting a good haircut. He drove to Kansas but didn’t attend his own son’s funeral. If he had, he would have heard the recording, with his son detailing how he had overheard his father talk about murdering Bill's mother, Mary.
When Vail learned of the recording, he wrote to Pastor Tim Howey, asking for a copy. He blamed his son’s statements on “false memories,” saying, “I have not known about it until now and am stunned.”
In 2012, while attempting to confront Vail with reporter Jerry Mitchell whom she had contacted to write about Vial, Rose was stopped by Kaye Faulkner, Vial’s sister. She told Rose and Mitchell of the recording and urged Mitchell to get a copy of it. She also said that she believed Vial had murdered Mary Horton, Sharon Hensley, and Annette Craver.
She gave the reporter Vial’s number, as well as the numbers of her other brother, Ronnie, and her sister, Beth. Vial didn’t answer those calls, so Mitchell left a message. Ronnie promised to speak to his brother on his behalf.
MITCHELL INVESTIGATES
Mitchell arrived in Lake Charles and stopped by the Southwestern Louisiana Genealogical and Historical Library, which shared copies from old city directories. He began tracking down people who had lived in the Maree Apartments with Felix and Mary.
Many described Mary’s fair of drowning. A close friend of Vails, Judson McCann II described Vial as a ladies’ man, and insinuated he was a cheater. “Many nights, his car wouldn’t be home, and Mary would be there with the lights on. When Felix was gone, it wasn’t because he was trotline fishing.”
Another close friend, Bob Hodges described Vial’s story of Mary ‘falling’ in the river as “horse manure.”
A college roommate of Mary, Sandra Sudduth Pratt, said “Nobody believed it was an accident.”
Mitchell shared Mary’s autopsy report with pathologist Dr. Michael Baden of New York City, who concluded that foul play had taken place in her death.
The report showed large bruises with bleeding into tissues on the left side of the neck, which he said suggested she suffered forceful neck trauma before entering the water. There were hemorrhagic bruises to the right calf and left leg above the knee, which he said were consistent with a struggle before her submersion. But most convincingly of all was the scarf authorities found around her neck that extended 4 inches into her mouth, which suggested traumatic asphyxia before entering the water.
“Somebody had to push that scarf into her mouth. She had to have that scarf wedged in her mouth before she was put in the water.”
A cousin put Mary’s brother Will Horton in touch with former detective “Rabbit” Manuel, who had headed up the Calcasieu Parish Sheriff Office’s investigation back in 1962. He had never forgotten Mary’s death. “Felix’s story just didn’t add up. The fishing tackle was dry. The trotline was dry. The boat was dry. Even Felix’s cigarettes were dry, despite him telling the deputies he dove straight in the water to save Mary.”
He and Manuel met with “Lucky” DeLouche, who directed an elite task force unit that investigated homicides. Three young detectives took notes as they talked. Manuel shared details from the case, saying deputies (officers) wanted to prosecute, but the district attorney wouldn’t let them. Horton shared the autopsy report, Vail’s letters and his belief that Vail was a serial killer. Horton said DeLouche replied, “This absolutely fits the profile of a serial killer,” to which the other detectives agreed.
Shortly afterwards, DeLouche left the task force, and for seemingly the hundredth time, grew cold again.
After Mitchell posted a story about Vail titled “Gone” (It’s nearly 9,000 words long, and the precursor to the 35,500 word story I have drawn heavily from) a man named Wesley Turnage contacted him. He told him of a conversation he had had with Vail in 1963 during a car ride.
According to Turnage, Vail called Mary a bitch and said she thought another child would help solve their marriage problems. He quoted Vail as saying, “She wanted to have another kid. I didn’t want the one I got. I fixed that sorry bitch. She will never have another one.”
Mitchell would make another discovery. District Attorney Salter Jr. had ordered that the judge dismiss 882 criminal cases — more than three cases for each working day.
Will Horton told Mitchell the original detectives in the case told him that Salter wouldn’t allow them to present the evidence they had collected against Vail. That matched the stories Mitchell had heard from grand jurors’ families.
Horton then contacted District Attorney John DeRosier, who said he would be willing to reopen the case if there was enough evidence.
Then came an interesting wrinkle in the story. Finding Vail.
He’d disappeared, returning on Labor Day weekend 2012 to sell his property, before disappearing again. Luckily, another reader of "Gone" came to the rescue. He phoned Mitchell, telling him where Vial was. Canyon Lake, Texas.
Mitchell then contacted Enzo Yaksic, founder of the Serial Homicide Expertise and Information Sharing Collaborative. Yaksic then contacted Armin Showalter, acting chief for the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit, which specialized in serial homicide investigations.
Yaksic shared a copy of GONE with Showalter, who in turn called Calcasieu Parish Deputy Randy Curtis, now taking on the Vail case. Curtis phoned Mitchell to find out where Vail was. A few days later, he called back to say the FBI had discovered Vail purchased property at 737 Shadyview Drive in Canyon Lake.
On Jan. 18, 2013, Curtis decided to confront Vail. He found him at that address, living in a storage shed. Curtis said he read Vail his rights before asking him about the death and disappearances of the women. Vail refused to say anything, accusing families and The Clarion-Ledger (Where "Gone" was published) of lying about him. The whole time, Vail couldn’t stop smirking.
​
Will Horton gave Mitchell the number of his cousin, who was a caretaker for 90-year-old Isaac Abshire Jr. When Mitchell sat down with the man, he shared a haunting story.
Abshire had worked with Vail and offered him a room to rent out. Once Vail and Mary were married, Vail had moved out. Abshire viewed himself as “a big brother” to Mary, calling her “a sweet little girl.”
After the marriage, Vail had become angry at work, talking about how ugly his wife was when she was pregnant, and how he didn’t like his baby. On the Friday before she was killed, the couple visited Abshire, bringing Bill, who was still an infant. Mary privately asked Abshire if he thought Vail could take her baby away.
Two days later, Mary was dead.
Abshire and two other workers went out the next day to drag the river. The next morning, Oct. 30, 1962, he returned with one of them, Jimmy May, to continue dragging.
Abshire said while they were talking, “something popped up. A guy with binoculars asked, ‘Does she have blonde hair?’ I said, ‘Yes, that’s her.’”
They recovered the body, and Abshire could never forget what he saw. Her body was rigid, and a scarf was wrapped around her neck before going into her mouth. Blood boiled on the boat, everyone voicing the same opinion. Vail had killed Mary.
Abshire had kept photos from that day for over 50 years. He said he had given them to Deputy Curtis as well as a copy of the 1962 sheriff’s report, which listed 15 points suggesting Vail’s guilt.
Despite being behind on major bills, Vail had managed to pay an entire year’s premiums in advance for a $50,000 ($150,000 today) life insurance policy on his wife. He had a second life insurance policy on her for $8,000 ($24,000 today), which promised to pay double if she died by accident.
It was almost as if he knew she was about to die.
Deputies had reported witnesses claims that Vail had told them he didn’t love his wife, that she looked stupid and vulgar, and that he had had sexual relations with multiple women, and at least one man.
Vail told deputies that his wife was wearing an off-white leather jacket when she went into the water. But she wasn’t wearing the jacket when her body was recovered. Inside his boat, deputies found two life preservers. Mary had not been wearing one, despite her fear of drowning. As for the trotline the 2 were supposedly running, deputies found it still inside Vail’s tackle box.
Most witnesses the Deputies had spoken too felt that Vail was capable of killing his wife.
When asked if he believed Vail killed his wife, Abshire said “Oh, my God, yes.”
THE CHASE & THE FINAL CLUES:
Ever since Vail had sold his Mississippi property, Mary Rose had wondered if he would eventually sell the Tulsa property, the one she and Annette had lived in. He did. Vail sold it for $149,000. Rose asked the question on the mind of everyone investigating. “What is he going to do with all that money? --- He could be running.”
On April 30th Mitchell got a call saying that Vail had left Texas. He was pulled over by police in Columbus, Mississippi after hopping the fence of his now dead brother Ronnie’s property. Curtis told Mitchell that the Columbus police were sending him a photo of Vail and the white pick-up truck he was pulled over in. He once again warned Mitchell that Vail could be running.
Vail’s sister called again, saying she heard her brother was heading to Montpelier. She wondered if he was driving to the home of possible witness Wesley Turnage.
Mitchell called Turnage to let him know that Vail might be headed his way. Turnage replied “If he sets foot on my property, there won’t be no trial.” He called Mitchell back later, saying no one in Montpelier had seen Vail.
Private Investigator Gina Frenzel, who had questioned Vail herself, including pretending to be his girlfriend, called Mitchell with good news. Vail had contacted her and told her he was back in Canyon Lake. Mitchell informed Curtis.
On May 17th 2012, authorities arrested Felix Vail for the murder of his wife Mary Horton.
In telephone calls from the jail in Lake Charles, he shared his explanation of what happened the night of Oct. 28, 1962, when Mary died.
He referred to his first wife as a “coon-ass lady,” saying she was “half kneeling” on his feet when she “saw one of the float buckets that were on the line.” He said the boat was “going real slow along the edge of the bank when the boat hit a stump ... and it dumped her right out.” Vail said he shut off the motor and dove in “where she had plopped in the water. I mean, nothing. The river had sucked her right in.” He said he “dove around until I was exhausted, and came in immediately to the police station in town and reported the accident and that was it.”
This story differed greatly from his story in 1962 when he said his wife was sitting on top of a boat seat when she fell out, not that she was kneeling on his feet. Back then, he said nothing about hitting a stump — just swerving to miss it.
It also differed from the story he had told his son, where a wave from another boat had dumped Mary out.
Vail told Frenzel that the case “has been an avalanche coming down the mountain all that time, waiting to hit my head, and it finally has.”
He blamed the families and Mitchell, “an evil, shrimpy reporter,” for what had happened, calling the charges “fabricated” and insisting that “a large amount of money, hate and political ambitions are behind them.”
At Vail’s request, Frenzel returned his truck to his home and went inside to take care of a few tasks. While there, she spent 16 hours photographing all his journals, more than 2,400 pages. She also photographed letters, documents, photographs and business cards, some dating back to the 1960s. She found a collection of women’s jewelry, old buttons, pins, and even a glass dildo.
Disturbingly, if at this point unsurprisingly, she found a photograph of a naked 3-year-old girl. Frenzel later spoke with the girl, now a woman. The journals revealed that Vail had stalked her for years.
Frenzel discovered the birth certificate of Annette Craver, who had used it for previous trips to Mexico.
Mitchell and Frenzel poured through the journals she had photographed. They noticed gaps in them that lead them to believe Vail had ripped pages out, including times when he should have been with Sharon and Annette.
His journals were dominated by sex, dreams of sex and reflected an obsession with children. In a March 27, 1986, entry, Vail wrote about the visit of a woman and her daughters in his home. “The little girls were delicious --- We massaged some, hugged & kissed some & it was 12 (midnight) & time for them to go.”
On Aug. 29, 1992, Vail walked into the Wal-Mart in West Point, and as he wrote in his journal “a 1-year-old white girl looked in my eyes loving me like there was no age difference between us.”
When Mitchell interviewed Kert Germany, a co-worker of Vail in 1977 he said that Vail attracted women wherever he went, and that Vail had told him the best sex of his life had been with 2- or 3-year-old girl.
It was that this time that Alexandra Christianson, Vail’s ex-wife called Mitchell and told him her story. She also put him in contact with Bruce Biedebach, the man she had been on a date with when she left with Vail. Biedebach would tell Mitchell that during a party in 1965 that turned into a “boast-fest” Vail had boasted about something he had done, that no one else had done.
Killed his wife.
He told the men at the party that he had held his wife’s head underwater until she drowned.
Biedebach then put Mitchell in contact with Rob Fremont, who had bicycled around California with Vail when he was 13. He said that while riding with Vail, he had told him that he hit his wife on the head and drowned her. Fremont never rode with him again after that.
With as much evidence as they could possibly gather, the case went to trial.
THE TRIAL:
Vail’s trial began on August 8th, 2016.
District Attorney John DeRosier laid out the evidence clearly.
He spoke of the evidence against Vail about Mary’s murder on October 28th, 1962.
He spoke about Vail swearing to Sharon Hensley’s mother that she wanted to start a new life in 1974.
He spoke about his letters to Mary Rose, telling her he wouldn’t tell her where her daughter Annette was “even if he knew.” Vail smirked at that one.
Finally, he spoke to the jurors.
“Mary Horton Vail is gone, Sharon Hensley is gone,” DeRosier said, “and Annette Craver Vail is gone.”
“You’re going to write the last chapter, and it’s simply going to read, ‘And justice was finally done. William Felix Vail, guilty as charged.’”
Prosecutors called all three families to testify.
Will Horton told jurors of his sister, “Mary was the kind of person you would want as a friend.” He broke while talking about visiting his nephew after he death in 1962. “I just wanted Bill to know how much his mother loved him.”
Brian Hensley told jurors that he last saw his sister, Sharon, with Vail before the pair left Bismarck, North Dakota, in 1972. Other than a telephone call and letter in the months that followed, he said no one had seen or heard from her since.
When Mary Rose took the stand, Vail bowed his head.
This was the woman who had been working for 32 long years to bring him into this court.
This was the mother who had waited 32 years for this moment.
She called Annette “a huge light in my life. We were always loving toward each other.” She testified that Vail ran off with her daughter on his motorcycle and married her. She testified that Annette, who inherited nearly $100,000 and received two homes, disappeared weeks after deeding those homes to Vail.
Wesley Turnage, Rob Fremont, and Bruce Biedebach swore under oath that Vail said he killed his first wife. Biedebach said he asked Vail if Mary was a bitch, to which Vail had said yes. Vail laughed in court as he told the story.
The current coroner, forensic pathologist Dr. Terry Welke, testified that in most drownings, the body comes up in a “dead person’s float,” with the back of the head surfacing first and the limbs hanging down in the water.
After sharing a series of pictures to show it, he showed the court two black-and-white photographs of Mary Horton when her body was recovered on Oct. 30, 1962, less than two days after she reportedly drowned. Her body was stiff, with her hands over chest as if she was in a coffin.
They also saw the videotaped testimony of Isaac Abshire Jr, who had died in 2014. He said her body was stiff when it surfaced either sideways or face up when she bobbed up in the Calcasieu River.
That testimony helped contribute to Welke’s homicide conclusion. So did the unbroken grease-like stain across her Chi Omega sweatshirt, which he believed could have come from a tarp covering her. Welke concluded Mary was dead and stiff before her body went into the water, explaining why rigor had set in.
Testimony was heard of Vail not paying for his own wife’s funeral, despite having made thousands from her life insurance.
THE VERDICT
The jury didn’t even take a half hour to reach their verdict.
William Felix Vail Sr was unanimously found guilty of murdering Mary Horton. He was sentenced to life in prison.
After the verdict, the prosecutor also revealed that the FBI had found out that Vail had molested a child over 30 years ago. They were unable to put him on trial for it, as the statue of limitations had passed.
Finally, nearly 54 years after she was murdered, Mary Horton had found justice.
Finally, 42 years after her disappearance, Sharon Hensley had found justice.
And Annette Craver, with the help of her mother Mary Rose’s tireless efforts, had finally found justice after 32 years.
https://content.api.news/v3/images/bin/f75084c7dce4fb08e12e45ccba5e40a1
This a photo of Mary, Sharon and Annette. I felt it was fitting to end off with. May they all rest in peace.
MY SOURCES:
https://www.namus.gov/MissingPersons/Case#/8284?nav
https://charleyproject.org/case/annette-michelle-craver-vail
https://www.clarionledger.com/story/news/local/felixvailgone/2016/12/29/felix-vail-gone-one-wife-dead-two-other-missing-jerry-mitchell/95895894/
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/5796622/mary-elizabeth-vail
https://charleyproject.org/case/sharon-hensley
https://www.namus.gov/MissingPersons/Case#/20525?nav

Author's Note: This story is long. I'm sorry. It really deserves to be told exactly as it happened and therefore, I am forced into murdering brevity. I hope that in time you'll forgive me.
I'm going to tell y'all another stupid story. I should warn you that this one isn't really a comedy, despite being set in a RadioShack.
A few months after Cocaine-Kevin took off for Brazil in pursuit of true love, we got a new transfer employee. We came to call him 'Aikedo-Kevin' (I'm adding the -Kevin because this is a subreddit about Kevins.)
We called him 'Aikedo' because we met him before the final act of the following chain of events took place and afterwards we just didn't have the motivation to attach anything else to him.
When I replay what happened in my head, it astounds me that this took place at all. I mean, we had our fair share of Kevins at RadioShack. There was Cocaine-Kevin, (whom you've previously met.) Crazy-Kevin, 'TP' Kevin, Kevin the Customer, and Kevin the Destroyer. Every one of these people occupy space in my brain for various reasons, but out of all these Kevins, Aikedo-Kevin is the most memorable. And not for the reason you'd most expect.
As if he represented the cosmic opposite to the Kevin he was replacing, this new Kevin came across as competent. He was older and well-kept. He didn't smell at all like sun-dried squirrel and rather than being cartoonishly fat, he was worryingly thin. He looked surprisingly normal for a RadioShack employee; completely trustworthy, certainly like the guy you'd confidently go to to get your Questions Answered.
Looking at him, I would never have believed in a million years that he would be the most profligate serial liar that I've ever had the misfortune to meet.
I know that I should start this tale at the beginning; with the story of how he got his name, but I really don't have the space, so instead we'll just rollercoaster through this cascade of events much like I did originally.
Almost from the moment Kevin showed up, things got real weird, real fast. He lasted for about six months with us, but they were unforgettable. It started with Kevin telling us that he was a 'triple-stripe; dragon-class' black belt in aikedo. Then he told us that he met Kiss back in the 70's and they invited him back to their hotel to party. Then the lies got egregious. He was late because there was a riot at Publix. Someone else ate the food that I had clearly marked and labelled in the back fridge. His dad was in the CIA and helped plan Vietnam with Henry Kissinger. He didn't know why the drawer was short $5.34. He was allergic to fruit. The list was long and got progressively weirder as the weeks went by, but it was generally innocuous; innocent.
But then he fucked up. He told a lie about NASA. Guys, this was a RadioShack. We were all nerds of various stripes, with varying areas of scientific interest and knowledge. There was NO possibility in any universe that one could just traipse into my RadioShack and successfully lie about NASA. Especially this particular lie. There was even less of a possibility that upon hearing such a lie spoken, any of us RadioShack employees would let it go unchallenged.
Ok, now that all the foreshadowing is out of the way, let me get down to the meat. I mean, that's why you're still here, right?
This chain of events spanned three days and it began in the way these things always do; somewhat accidentally.
DAY 1: THE NASA PROVOCATION
It was a normal Florida afternoon for everyone who didn't work at my store. As usual, I came in on second (closing) shift. I was taking over from Kevin, who'd just returned from his vacation. The drawer was missing $5.34. Again? Wtf? He 'fixed' it while I was in the back re-counting it. Okay. $5.34? This is so weird. I have to report this shit.
While waiting for his wife to pick him up, Kevin told me that he and his family had had a blast in Cape Canaveral. That he was able to take his son into the 'anti-gravity chamber' at NASA. He went into great detail about how they 'flew around in the tunnel.'
Now, y'all... I'm not an idiot. I very well know how NASA trains their astronauts in Zero-G. Fuck it, I'll bite.
"Uh, Kevin, they use planes to simulate zero-gravity. What are you talking about?"
He shook his head conspiratorially and said, "No, they have secret pods. There's two. One in Huntsville, Alabama, and one at Cape Canaveral. It's top-secret. I have a friend."
I stood there transfixed as Kevin embellished his experiences at NASA a bit more, making sure I knew how cool it was that his kids got to meet all the astronauts and how big the pod really was (almost as big as the Pentagon) until his wife finally showed up and they left.
I think I took a minute before going back inside. I had to call Frank (our store manager) to report the drawer discrepancy. And if I'm being honest, I also wanted to inform him of NASA's Pentagon-sized secret. We were all getting sick of Kevin's fibs, but nobody had really said anything to him yet and I knew Frank was a huge NASA fan. Repeating to him what Kevin had said was tantamount to lighting off firecrackers at a funeral, and at that age, I just wanted to watch the world burn.
Frank answered on the first ring, as I knew he would if the store was calling him.
"Heeeyyyyy, Frank. So. My drawer was short $5.34 again. Kevin somehow fixed it. He also went to the, uh, secret anti-gravity pod at NASA while he was at Cape Canaveral."
Frank laughed. There was a long pause. Then he snarled.
"What? Your drawer was short?! I'm DONE with this!" Frank hung up. I looked down at the phone. Dang. Frank is a terrible force for truth in the universe. I knew this from painful personal experience.
DAY 2: KEVIN'S LAST LIE
I got a call at 5 am to come in early; that Kevin couldn't open. Whatever. More money for me. I rolled out of bed.
When I got there, Frank was behind the counter pacing and literally purple. I've never seen a human being that color before. He looked like an engorged eggplant preparing for a Kanly duel.
I was putting my stuff away in the back when Frank stomped in behind me. He was hollering about gravity and idiots and I realized immediately that Kevin was in major, major trouble.
A frission tickled its way through my central nervous system. Fear or anticipation? Uncertain. Frank could be terrifying. Alternately, Frank could be compassionate. Frank was a real street-dude; a living tragedy-to-triumph, rags-to-riches kind of guy. He was also a VERY understanding boss. He basically only had three rules: 'Don't fuckin' steal,' 'Don't bring your personal fuckery to the store,' and, most importantly, 'Don't EVER fuckin' LIE to me.'
Those are exact quotes and he lived up to them. I know this. And now you all know this too. Kevin should have known this, but Kevin lived life on the edge.
In the backroom, I squared my shoulders and pretended to be uninterested while watching Frank's face pulse with incandescent rage.
"What's up?" I ventured, trying to hide my curiosity.
Frank exploded like something you shouldn't microwave. His purple face rippled as he tried to roll his eyes and snort simultaneously. He looked for all the world like an indignant water buffalo. Which is funny really. See, big game hunters will tell you that despite looking slow and stupid, the water buffalo is one of the most dangerous animals on Earth. African buffalo will lay traps. They will actually double back to lie in wait to hunt their hunter. And, much like the animal he resembled, Frank too was dangerous and known for his traps.
He smiled at me ferally.
"Kevin called out this morning. Apparently his cousin the St. Petersburg cop got shot last night in a drug raid."
"What does that have to do with NASA?" I said stupidly.
Frank stared at me like I was the only Red Gal in the Blue Man Group.
"I busted Kevin last night for theft." Frank said slowly, with that owlish look he saved for especially thick customers.
Okaaaay "But, what does tha-" I stopped, the light bulb over my head starting to flicker.
"Oh." I said.
Frank was still staring at me, perhaps waiting for my brain to finish its loading sequence. Accurately concluding that I was operating somewhat below dial-up speed, he sighed impatiently and continued.
"My wife called the hospital just now. They don't have anyone by the name of (Kevin's cousin's name) on file there. She called two other hospitals just to be sure."
I just looked at him blankly. "Waaaait. what?!" My mental bulb finally snapped on and flared brightly. Oh shiiit. My brain is furiously connecting dots. Did he lie to get un-caught for thieving? Is that a even a thing? Wtf?
Frank nodded grimly and picked up the phone. He dialed Kevin's number.
Unfortunately for this story, I had a customer walk in right then and therefore didn't hear what was said. Customers can be the most annoying things in the world sometimes. This one probably wasn't, but I don't remember because all I could think about was Kevin's career suicide. It seemed like an eternity passed before I was able to rejoin Frank in his investigation.
In the time I was away, Frank had learned two things: the first thing being that no cops had been shot according to the news, (which Kevin countered by claiming that the news wouldn't report a cop being shot in an on-going investigation,) and the second thing being that no hospital in the tri-county area had admitted anyone matching his cousin's name, (which Kevin dismissed by saying that secrecy was standard operating procedure in a 'Full Blackout' situation and that it's all put in place to protect a wounded cop's identity.
It was a testament to Frank's determination that he was able to do all this so quickly. Especially since this all happened back in the 90's before the sum of human knowledge was only a smartphone click away.
This inanity went on for my entire shift. Frank sending his wife to check out hospitals while he alternately called the local newspapers, TV stations, and Kevin.
Frank was terrifying in his pursuit of truth and I have to admit, it was a thing of beauty to watch him put his case together. Perry Mason be damned; Frank was on an investigative roll. But no matter what he learned, when he called Kevin, Kevin had an answer to it. A detailed answer. He went into specifics about how the bullet (9mm) hit his cousin's vest and richocheted off of a rib. He explained how it was a 'cartel case,' and everything has to be kept hush-hush. It was quite entertaining, if schadenfreude is your thing. It's not mine. I can't really explain how uncomfortable the whole thing made me feel. Like chewing on cotton. There's no way Kevin keeps his job. Kevin has the survival skills of a suicide bomber and the critical thinking skills of a cabbage. It was plain as day that Kevin was a drowning man grasping desperately for an anchor.
Finally, my shift ended and I went home mentally exhausted on Kevin's behalf.
As I left, I could see Frank behind the counter, still on the phone, hyper-focused, and absolutely intent upon some mission objective that I apparently wasn't cleared for. He told me just to be ready to close the next day.
DAY 3: THE GREAT DENOUEMENT
I woke up haunted with the strange certain knowledge that disaster was nigh. Maybe it was the same instinct that allows animals to sense an earthquake before it strikes. I really don't know. I felt both uncomfortable and giddy as I readied myself for work.
When I pulled into the RadioShack, I saw that Frank's Jeep was there. So was Frank's wife's SUV. Kevin's car was nowhere to be seen.
Oh boy... this was not a good sign. I parked and went in. Immediately I could see Frank, his wife, and the employee who had opened huddled furtively together behind the counter. No customers in sight.
Excellent, I thought. Maybe I'll finally get some Answers. This IS a RadioShack, after all, right?
As I counted in my drawer, the preliminary results of Frank's investigation poured out: allegedly Kevin had been taking money from the drawer to get McDonalds for lunch. The amount ($5.34) matched perfectly with the meal Kevin was observed eating each day that he worked. No one knew why he did this. He very obviously brought his lunch in from home every morning.
Frank was a-twitter with anticipatory fury as he spoke. After the conversation he'd had with Frank the previous night, Kevin had slyly switched shifts with another employee to avoid having to open and therefore face Frank. Which, of course, had jacked Frank's temper over from red to plaid. Kevin daring to dodge him like this was simply the last straw, and he had decided he was going to fire Kevin. ...Except, despite trying all morning, he hadn't managed to actually reach Kevin to give him the news.
Frank being Frank, this had in no way deterred him. He had simply looked in Kevin's employee file and called the emergency contact. By the time I walked in, the proverbial shit had hit the fan and was well on its ballistic arc towards us in the form of Kevin's wife.
Yall. It's really important for this story that you have a mental picture of Kevin's wife. Essential, even.
Do y'all remember that 90's song 'All Star' by that band Smashmouth? Remember the lead singer? If you don't, it's okay. Just picture Guy Fieri instead. Now picture Guy Fieri/the Smashmouth dude dressed up as Xena: Warrior Princess. That's what she looked like. She was enormous. Not necessarily fat, but big. I bet she could crush a watermelon with her thighs, easy. (That's really a thing, by the way. You should probably Google it. Fuck it, here ya go )
Anyway, 'Xena' was surprised to hear that Kevin wasn't at work. She was even more stunned by what Frank had to say.
At roughly the same time this phone conversation was taking place at the RadioShack, another, weirder conversation was taking place in person across town. Out of exasperation, and to out-manuever Kevin completely, Frank had finally just sent his wife down to the police station...
...which went something like this: she walked in, and asked if any cops had been shot recently. I imagine there was a pregnant pause at the reception desk while it was hurriedly determined whether or not she was a threat or a crazy person. She asked again and was told that no, no one had been shot recently. She then asked to speak with Officer (Kevin's Cousin's Name) and lo and behold! he happened to be walking by at that exact moment, un-wounded, ambulatory, and utterly confused as to why anybody thought he'd been shot in the first place.
Perched behind the counter in the RadioShack, listening to Frank and his wife list the steps they had taken and the results of taking said steps, I actually felt kind of bad for Kevin. I mean, why would he do this?
Why would anyone make up such a ridiculous lie? What did he have to gain? And most mysteriously, why was he stealing to buy lunch when he brought his own lunch in? The whole thing was steeped in bizarre absurdity and I was beginning to lose perspective of the situation when the door-chime dinged and Kevin walked contritely into the store, followed by his strapping virago of a wife.
Y'all. Holy shit. I don't think that I will be able to properly describe what followed but I will do my best.
When I was a kid, there was a cartoon I saw once. Maybe it was part of a Disney movie, maybe a Bugs Bunny short, I don't really remember. But in it, a ginormous nanny-type woman drags a teensy man into a room by his ear to force him to apologize for something.
That's almost exactly what happened. Xena frog-marched Kevin into the RadioShack and made him apologize for stealing. She literally made him hand over an envelope with $600 in it. (The amount Frank calculated Kevin had stolen over six months.) And then she berated him for breaking the diet she had set for him.
I'm going to say that again. He broke the diet she had set for him. This ... veritable Amazon of a woman had set a caloric limit for this dude who was already so skinny that he could likely crawl through the holes in a chain-link fence. All of a sudden, it all made sense. All of it. Kevin was emasculated, hence the lies. Kevin was desperate and fucking starving, so he stole to feed himself. I was wrestling with my new-found understanding of all things Kevin when she told us the envelope was all of his 'allowance' money. At this point, I was entirely speechless. I could only gape witlessly at her.
Stealing a glance back at Frank, I could tell he was going through the very same emotional turmoil as I was.
In the uncomfortable silence, Kevin handed over his keys and mumbled something about it being great working with us and then they left.
With the possible exception of the first time I saw the cemetary scene in Steel Magnolias, I have never gone from one emotional extreme to the other so quickly. Where I had been affronted by his actions only minutes earlier, now I felt unimaginable regret and I could tell Frank felt the same way. Frank had held back from revealing that he'd had his wife visit the police station and he never even brought it up. He looked deflated; all the energy and momentum of the chase gone, replaced by utter shock and remorse.
Y'all, I bet you thought this story was going to have a happy ending. Or at least a funny one. I'm sorry to disappoint you. No happy ending here, just a cloudy moral lesson.
Kevin was fired and we never saw him again, though I insisted that Frank's wife go back down to the police station and tell Kevin's cousin everything we'd seen and heard. I felt that I owed him that much, being responsible for the initial phone call that had set everything in motion.
Yes, Frank and I learned much and more that day. That experience changed something in me. I'd like to think I'm a better person now.
Oh, I still laugh at Kevins, but I don't assume anything anymore. Oh, no. I've learned that everyone has a truth to tell, even if it comes swaddled in lies.

June 10th, 327
It’s been a bit since I’ve written here. I decided to give Augustine a looser leash and I allowed him to explore the outside world as long as he knew what he was doing.
June 11th, 327
Augustine said he had something to tell me later tonight, he’d been exploring almost every day now, the active sense of adventure that boy has honestly impresses me.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A: Hey Zach
Z: Hey what’s up?
A: I wanna tell you about something I found while I was exploring the other day.
Z: Spill then.
A: Alright, so as I was playing around with my long distance teleportation spell and I ended up on the base of a large mountain range. It was strange as I couldn’t teleport all the way to the top, it was like something within the very mountain’s mineral makeup was negating my attempts to teleport up to its peak. So I decided to scale the mountain the old fashion way: climbing it. Thanks to the enhancements given to me by that project I scaled the mountain in no time, and the other side? It was like nothing the world has ever seen, the mountain range was hiding a large gulf of water, a large island placed just within the gulf, lush forest and 2 large mountains towards the center, a place that seemed untouched by time itself. It could be the perfect place to permanently hide from the Templar, after all we can only hide in this cabin for so long before they eventually find us.
I was certainly surprised at the fact that he was able to scale an entire mountain with seemingly very little effort, but what interested me more was the island he discovered. He claimed it looked “untouched” but the higher ups at the Templar claimed they have colonized nearly all the available land in this world so to have an entire island be left untouched is almost like foreign concept, something of legend.
Z: An untouched island? Not only untouched but also unheard of. The Templar said they’ve colonized all known land in this world.
A: I know! But I couldn’t see any mana towers among the trees or any humans from the peak of the mountains.
Z: Well if still untouched after all this time, chances are that they won’t find it anytime soon.
A: exactly! A place where the Templar will never reach…solemn look
Z: What's wrong Augustine? The memories and thoughts haunting you again?
A: yea, I’m sorry to constantly bother you with them but I’ve kept them contained for too long
Z: Hey, hey it’s alright. You’ve never been a bother at all, helping you deal with your issues is what friends are for.
A: I appreciate it Zach, for the longest time Elock was really the only friend I’ve ever had so it’s enlightening hearing someone else say that, to this day I still wonder where she is today and if she’s even alive! I used to have nightmares where I would meet her again just to discover that she’s-
Z: it’s alright, I’m sure she thinks about you every day too and most likely wonders the same every night.
A: Yeah I know, but it’s hard remaining optimistic in this world with the whole war between humans and keidran going on.
Z: Well to me that island sounds like a great place to start.
A: agreed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Augustine and I agreed to visit the island he found beyond the mountains tomorrow, he thinks it’ll be the perfect place to hide from the Templar.
June 12th, 327
Augustine said that the mountain range was incredibly far, about days worth of running in Augustine’s estimation, so teleporting there is just another thing to add to the list of things he impresses me with. While the material the mountain range is composed of prevents any magic from directly interacting with them, they don’t extend beyond that, so Augustine offered to fly us up there using a telekinetic spell.
Turns out Augustine is only used to telekinetically lifting one item, how do I know? Because he accidentally dropped me. Luckily I landed in a tree. After traversing both sides of the mountain and making it across the water, we arrived on the island at last and man Augustine wasn’t lying. It truly was beautiful, lush fruit bearing trees, 2 large mountains and not even the smallest hint of Templar interference!
We headed further inland and decided to stay at the valley between the 2 mountains with Augustine immediately getting to work and hacking away at the tree with the guard’s sword. After a few hours of work, Augustine already had a large pile of planks with me barely keeping up and Augustine teasing me about it, oh I’m sorry not everyone is a magically enhanced super soldier.
It was beginning to grow dark and we made the decision to head back to the cabin for today and continue the build some later time. Augustine made a waypoint in the cabin so getting back was easy though it had some issues as it took a while to activate. I took a rock sample from the mountains to analyze back at the cabin.
June 13th, 327
This was fascinating! The rock sample I took had incredibly unique properties never before seen! Its primary ability was “absorbing” sources of mana. I had stabbed one of our mana crystals into the rock and I observed as it broke down the crystal over the course of an hour! This explains why Augustine couldn’t teleport up the mountain. So even if the Templar did find the mountain they would never get over it, even with the most powerful mages magic.
Augustine had gone out to town again, he said it was to pick up building tools to help shore up the house we were building. He claimed he could handle it on his own and despite me wanting to protest, I let him go through with it. Unfortunately the town we went to around a week ago didn’t have a hardware store as any construction must run through Lulio first, so Augustine had to head to the neighboring town to see if he could find anything there.
~~~~~~~~~~
(Cut to Augustine’s pov)
Thoughts: “ugh cmon how hard could a hardware store be to find, it feels like I’ve been searching for hours already!”
sees sign with a hammer on it
“Gah! Finally!”
heads inside
Shopkeeper: Greetings sir! How may I assist you today?
“Uhh it’s alright I can handle it on my own, thanks for the offer though!”
Thoughts: this time the illusion should last longer as these mana crystals are fresh rather than being recharged.
grabs a large amount of nails, 2 hammers, some axes to preserve his sword, saws, sand paper, and stone blocks
Shopkeeper: Oh my sir, this is an awful load that you’ll have to carry on your own, are you sure you can handle it?
“Yes I’m sure…”
Shopkeeper: Are you sure? We have a policy that allows you to rent slaves to help you with whatever you’re working on.
“No, n-“
(Shopkeep rings a bell to send a slave to the front before Augustine could interject)
Thoughts: are you kidding me? Gahhh cmon Zack is waiting for me and I don’t wanna keep him on the line!
Female voice: coming!
Augustine: frustrated and staring at the floor
Shopkeeper: How about this one? Hard worker she is, very cooperative, very friendly.
Augustine: looks up
Elock: hello sir! How may I assist you today?
shivering
Thoughts: E- Elock?! When?! How?! I thought you worked for a farmer?! I can’t say anything, it'll reveal my identity to the worker! Okay, okay, okay just keep it calm!
“I- uh stuttering I changed my mind! She can help me, I’ll take her!”
Shopkeeper: I’m not surprised, she’s gone from owner to owner as she’s quite a hard worker, she’s worth a lot of money after being traded so many times before ending up at my place. 1000G for 7 days.
“I- yes I’ll take her”
Shopkeeper: perfect!
exits with supplies and Elock
~~~~~~~~~~
Elock looking at Augustine’s wanted poster: solemn
“Something wrong?”
Elock: oh! N-nothing! It’s just these ropes binding my hands are just a bit tight! And W-where are we heading sir? We’re outside of town at this point and I- uh-
A: chuckles a bit you’re still just as bad as ever at hiding your nervousness Elock
Elock: Ah- I- how do you know my name?!
A: unties the rope and disables illusion It’s been a while, wouldn’t you agree?
Elock in shock and on the verge of tears: I…A…trembling, mouth slightly ajar in shock
A: what? Cat got your tongue? Well I guess that’s true consid-
Elock: pounces on him AUGUSTINE! I’ve missed you so much!How have you been?!Where did you- starts talking so fast that even Augustine couldn’t keep up with what she was saying and weeping happy tears profusely on his shirt
A: slightly choking from how tight she’s hugging him it’s okay, it’s okay! I’ve missed you too. I almost thought you were gonna be de- ow ow! Stop it I was kidding!
Elock: blep I know. Not a single day went by where I didn’t think about you! And say weren't your eyes brown before?
A: I’m flattered that you still remember and well…it’s kind of a long story…but first let’s retreat to safety. teleports with Elock
~~~~~~~~~~
A: …and then I ended up here
Elock: That’s incredible! You sure had been on a wild cart ride while I was gone! I wish I could have been there.
A: It's not as glamorous as it sounds, that experiment was agony incarnate, it’s a wonder I survived! In fact I was the only one who came out alive, though the powers I got bestowed with are certainly nothing to complain about but still the effects after we’re brutal.
Elock: glad you did, the way you and Zach escaped the facility was incredible.
A: well he can tell you all about it points to cabin we’ve arrived
Zach opens door
A: Hey Zach, I’m back from my shopping spree.
Z: Augustine what took you so long? The plan was to just get the supplies and get out.
A: I know! But I got a bit off track. I found someone very special.
Elock: pokes head through the door Mrow?
A: meet Elock, remem-
Z: her! The keidran you met when you were 10?
A: yup to Elock it’s alright Elock it’s fine he won’t bite.
Elock: H- hello sir.
Z: please call me Zach. It’s a pleasure.
shakes hand
Elock: it’s a nice place you 2 have here.
A: It was by sheer luck that we found this place actually.
Z: Yeah, the blast was much larger than we’d anticipated and even if my house remained intact, they’d still come searching for me.
Elock: Well lucky you found this place when you did.
A: Are you hungry Elock? We have some steak leftovers.
Elock: oh, I am actually, thank you!
Z: say Elock…
Elock: yes?
Z: Would you mind telling us your journey? I’d love to learn.
A: Zach!
Z: Right, sorry.
Elock: No, no Augustine, it’s alright. I don’t mind in the slightest.
Life in the rainforest regions was paradise, plenty of food, clean sources of water, plenty of building materials, and a beautiful sight to wake up to everyday. My parents worked directly under the matriarch, Lektra(keidran for bolt/thunder) so me being born was almost as exciting as the coronation of the matriarch herself. Unfortunately that swiftly came to a close when Lulio decided to use our home as farmland and despite protests from Lektra, Lulio still went through with the plan. In a flash everything was pretty much destroyed. Our warriors tried to fight back but were eliminated instantly, I was about 3 when this happened and the memory still burns strong to this day.
Augustine: muttering under his breath psychotic bastard…
Elock: I know how you feel, Augustine, trust me I do.
A: I know, I’m sorry
Elock: holds his hand It's alright.
After the destruction of my people and my home, I was sent into the town and stayed in a keidran only home until my 4th birthday. Instead of pleasant accommodations like human orphan homes, all we got was a pillow and some sheets to make ourselves comfortable with, most of us slept on the hardwood floor and it was unbearable. Lulio passed a law where keidran as young as 4 would be eligible for work. After my 4th birthday I was almost immediately whisked off to work on a farm, while the job was tough, they at least gave me my own room and bed, one of their guests even took a small liking to me but tragically he died of a lung infection.
Z: I lament your journey and loss Elock, I can’t imagine how tough this was to bear all at once.
Elock: please it’s okay, you don’t have to apologize for anything. None of this is any of your wrongdoing.
Z: You said your people were killed but what about your parents? Did they survive too?
Elock: Oh right! My parents were spared as they opted to surrender peacefully and they were sold to different owners. I used to occasionally see them from time to time but after I moved I had to say a tearful goodbye to both them and Augustine. playfully pinches his cheek
Z: You’re strong for getting through that, not many could take that much.
Elock: I appreciate that.
Z: Do you have any idea where your parents are right now?
Elock: I think they’re still in the same tow- Augustine? Are you okay?
A: on the other hand gripping the table so hard that it was gonna break, eyes with a look of both confusion and rage
Elock: Augustine?
A: I- I saw them…
Elock: What do you mean?
A: They were there…in the same room.
Elock: Are you talking about the operation?
A: Y- yes…I saw them, both of them. They were in the operation too, part of the 10 keidrans selected to be in the experiment. I briefly saw them looking at me, they were scared but I couldn’t do a damn thing to help them and now they're dead! slowly growing hysterical
Elock: Augustine!
A: snaps out of his hysterics
Elock: it’s not your fault! Neither of you have to feel guilty!
A: I know, but I just wish I could have done something to help them, but I was just a powerless child.
Z: Augustine. We all wish we could have done something to stop Lulio’s plan, we all feel the same way just please don’t put all the blame on yourself.
A: I know, I'm sorry…
Elock: it’s alright…we’re all here to support you, you got hit the hardest out of all so you should be the one to be the one who receives sympathy.
A: …thanks guys, It feels like it’s been so long since I’ve heard something so comforting.
Elock: don’t worry, we’ll never leave and when we do, we’ll leave together.
A: …oh! Elock, I hate to do this but would you mind helping us with something? We found a place that could be our key to salvation.
Elock: Of course! I don’t mind in the slightest.
A: teleports all 3 of them via waypoint
~~~~~~~~~~
Elock: in awe of the island I…this is incredible! It reminds me so much of my home! And you were right! There’s no hint of Templar activity at all!
A: We were just as shocked as you are right now when we first found it. I mean like Zach said, the Templar claimed that they have settled on all available land in this world.
Elock: Well then, let’s make good use of this place, so let’s get to work!
A: I couldn't have said it better myself.
hours later, the trio had finished building a moderate sized wooden house
A: woo! Not bad for a day's work, am I right?
Elock: Mrrrr…man that was a nice workout!
Z: Tell me about it!
A: So Elock, should we tell Zach?
Elock: I think so!
Z: Tell me…what?
A: Well…on the way here, Elock and I started thinking and we were thinking of a way we could free other slaves from their captors.
Z: sigh… well at this point, I know better than to criticize your plan before even hearing it so go ahead, spill it on me.
A: Operation: torchwick
—————

1. Elock would be our messenger, using her spare time to get any other slaves on board with the plan, amassing as many as possible.
   
2. On the large hill next to the town, we plant a large amount of gray mana crystals. Where downhill wind will carry the effect down into the town
   

(Gray mana crystals were created for a special purpose, making large smokescreens on the battlefield)

1. I would then use a spell that emits a light that can’t be perceived by humans but can be seen by keidrans and basitins alike, Which would act as the signal to go for it.
   
2. The group would then head towards the light where we would then break for the mountains as fast as possible.
   

(Unfortunately the waypoint spell barely lasts for even a few days, and teleporting a large group of people via waypoint could be tough even for me)
I would then use as much of my power as possible to telekinetic lift as many refugees as possibl-
Z: Yeah…considering that you almost dropped me off the side of the mountain, I think even you would have trouble lifting a bunch of slaves.
A: hey!
Elock: Mreeheehee!
A: anyways! After we figure out a way to get everyone up there, we’ll be untouchable!
Z: huh…well from one chaotic strategist to another, it’s worth a shot.
A: Perfect! See Elock?
Elock: mew?
A: I kept the promise I made, all those years ago! when we meet again, it’ll be your freedom.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To be continued
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Also for anyone who wants to know a bit more about Elock:
Name: Elock of the rainforest leopards
Species: rainforest leopard
Languages: human, keidran
Physical characteristics: yellow fur, black nose marking, black rosettes running down back and onto tail, unusually big and poofy tail, butter yellow hair with black streaks, faint outline of heart pattern on her behind
Height: 5’4”
Age: 9 years(was 4 when she met Augustine)
Eye color: emerald green
Mental characteristics:
-Quick learner
-Eager to help
-Bad at hiding panic
-Imaginative
-Heart of gold
-Shy but slowly growing out of it
-Optimistic
Likes: adventure, rain, storytelling, being adored, helping, hugs(especially from Augustine), pouncing on people she cares about.
Dislikes: slavery, Templar(although not as intensely as most others)
Unlike most, Elock had the ability to both read and write prior to slavery, being taught by both her parents and Lektra herself. Spending most of her time reading and drawing using whatever material she could find.
Tell me what you thought of this chapter!

Brian was sitting in his armchair watching conspiracy theory videos sprinkled with ones about the paranormal, as he does most nights for several hours, when he was overcome by a sudden primal hunger near impossible to ignore. His stomach felt like it was imploding. He shoved the feeling down deeper and kept watching. This time, it was an interview with very contrarian physicist and philosophy enthusiast.
"What if I told you the universe isn't real? In what is called a bio-centrist view, consciousness is all that exists, and everything around us is just like a user-interface that our brains make and give our senses. If a tree falls in the forrest and nobody is around to hear it, not only does it not make a sound, but it doesn't even exist until a conscious observer walks past it."
"Ok, um, is any of this provable? This all sounds a little woo-woo for me," his guest replied.
"It is. In fact, the famous double-slit experiment we discussed with our last guest definitively proved that the universe isn't defined until a conscious observer witnesses it. Reductionists used to argue consciousness is an illusion, but ironically, we now know there is consciousness but we do not know there is anything else. So, one could say the outside world is an illusion. What we believe to be patterns that reliably predict how the universe should work all fall apart on the quantum level. My very efficient machine of a brain constructs a framework for understanding what's around me, but I only see what fits into that framework. If you give someone with bipolar disorder an optical illusion, they will not be deceived by the illusion because their brain works differently, and the illusion was built for you and I. All of what us neurotypical people see is a shared illusion because we have similar constructs for interpretting the world. The real universe could be far more bizarre than we give it credit for."
The video ended, and with a deep breath, he pried himself from his armchair and stumbled into the kitchen. In his freezer were the remains of a pulled pork sandwich. Fighting his most basic carnal desires, he stared at it sitting in the freezer as cool refreshing fog surrounded it and gave an almost other-worldly ambiance to this heavenly meat.
In an instant, this 145lb 6'2" man's resolve shattered. He grabbed a plate, threw the entire sandwich in the microwave, and in only 90 seconds there was nothing standing between him and satiety. He sat at the table with a fork and knife, prepared to take small bites and savor each moment when just as suddenly as the urge to feed overcame him, a stronger urge not to compelled him to get up from the table and prepare for bed, putting the entire event to rest. He didn't put it back in the freezer but left it out, figuring the rotting smell would ruin his taste for the meat.
The next two days, he tried to eat various foods such as dried fruits, protein bars, vegetables, and small servings of oatmeal. He could barely get any of it down. All the while, this rotting meat was sitting on his kitchen table during a particularly hot week of summer, attracting flies.
Brian worked from home, but the quality of his work had been suffering lately. Barely having the energy to work, he sat at his computer and tried to focus on the task at hand when he heard a wet plop. He looked behind him and saw the dinner plate face down on the floor with his sandwich from several nights ago underneath. He slowly got up and attempted to clean up the mess when one of the most incredible events in mankind's history happened to this frail man in a crumbling old Kansas City apartment. His food spoke to him.
"Freeze me," it said.
"But you're a sandwich. Sandwiches don't talk."
"Brian, listen closely. I am God, and I can take many forms. Who are you to question me? If I wish to take this form and ask you to help me preserve it, you shall do as I ask."
"Alright," sighed Brian. He put the sandwich in the freezer. Then, he watched an episode of King of Queens and went to bed.
The next morning, he opened the freezer to check on his new friend, but it just sat there lifeless.
A couple weeks went by with nothing. Brian resumed his work and watched his videos. Everything became fairly routine again until he again felt what he called "an unholy cramping" in his stomach. He got up from the chair and managed to fight the temptation to disobey the sandwich for a few more minutes. He knew he couldn't hold it off forever. Again, he resisted the urge to feed, and again he left it out for several days only to be shocked that his sandwich spoke to him. It felt like it was happening for the first time. Even though the last time it happened was less than a month ago, it was barely a vague memory. Brian once again followed the orders of the sandwich and refroze it.
This cycle would soon be broken though. A few months later, a new family moved in next door and caught him in the hallway as he went to get his mail.
"Oh hi! I'm Susan. We just moved into 2C."
"Brian, I'm in 2D."
"Oh, so we're neighbors then!!!" she exclaimed and rushed in for a hug. "We just moved here from Sydney and absolutely love this city's zoo! There is so much to do in this town. What are some good restaurants you'd recommend?"
"Oh, I don't eat out. I make my own food."
"Smart. I bet that's how you stay so fit. Listen, my husband Kyle and I would love to invite you over to our new place for a homecooked meal," Susan said with a warm motherly tone.
"Ok, can I bring my own food?"
"S- sure. Is 7pm tonight good?"
"Yeah, see you then" Brian said hurriedly as he darted back to his apartment, trying to give the vibe he was too busy to chat.
He stared blankly at his kitchen cabinets with a mounting sense of pressure. He would NOT eat whatever she prepares. He can't control the calories, the macronutrients, the portions, any of it, and he knew if he were to arrive empty-handed, he'll have to eat whatever they prepare. He couldn't find anything hearty enough to look like a meal though. All he had in his cabinets were nuts, vegetables, and some protein bars. He knew there was only one food in his home that fit the bill. It will look like a normal dish, and then he can pretend he isn't feeling so he won't need to eat it. Such an excuse would be insulting if he doesn't eat their food, but who cares if he claims he's sick and won't eat food he brought?.
"But the smell. What will you do to cover the smell?" his sandwich asked him.
"Spices! I'll cover you in spices. The strongest smelling spices. He doused the sandwich in peppermint extract, which surprisingly, did fully cover the scent of rotting meat.
He spent the afternoon bathing it in a large bowl filled with peppermint extract. It was the strongest bonding moment the two of them had so far. They both were singing. Brian grabbed a toothbrush and whimsically pretended to be scrubbing it down. He had never had such a genuine connection with anyone before.
"Brian, do you trust me?"
He nodded.
"I require proof. Make a small incision on your hand and place a piece of me in it. We are blood brothers."
Hesitantly, Brian obliged, and he shoved a small piece of this maggot-infested minty meat into his hand and promptly poured alcohol on it. He then bandaged up the wound. As he sat in his favorite armchair waiting for the dinner with his new friends, he thought to himself "I'm so glad I'm trained in first-aid. Most people wouldn't be prepared for this and wouldn't even think to rinse the wound with alcohol."
As the meal time approached, Brian changed the bandage, put on his formal attire, and reheated the sandwich once more to freshen it up.
He rang the doorbell and was already starting to form pit stains through his one dress shirt.
"Hi, come in! This is my husband Kyle."
"Brian."
"Pleased to meat you, Brian. Please, take a seat. Can I get you something to drink?"
"Water please," Brian replied as he sat at the table.
The lunch sack he brought the sandwich in began to squirm. "Brian? Briiiiii-an... did you hear what the man said? Pleased to meat you? He knows. He has one of my brethren in his fridge. He calls it his meat-mate. His wife gets jealous. That's why she's so bubbly around you. She wants to make him jealous. Introduce me to his meat-mate. We can sort all this out."
Susan started looking concerned. "Brian? Are you ok? Hello? What happened to your hand?"
Kyle's demeanor quickly changed from one of sociable hospitality to distrust. He could tell there was something off about Brian.
Picking up on this, Brian attempted to build rapport. "I'm fine, really. It was just an accident in the kitchen."
Susan, trying to dismantle the awkwardness replied "ouch, I'm so sorry. Kyle just did that a few months back."
At that moment, Brian turned to Kyle with curiosity. He looked deep into his eyes and told him in a very heart-to-heart manner "I want to show you something."
He opened up his lunch sack and pulled out his slab of rotten meat sandwiched between two blue-green moldy pieces of bread. Ashamed he never married, Brian said "my beautiful wife was jealous of it at first, but we have a very different bond." Turning to Susan, he explained "the bond between man and woman is different from between man and meat. Your husband's meat can co-exist with you. You don't need to feel threatened."
"You need to leave. Meal's over, bud. Get out," Kyle said while clutching a knife under the table. As Brian grabbed his sandwich and was headed out, he saw the knife and grew concerned for Susan's safety. Clearly, Kyle had gone too far down this dark path and had become so fixated on his meat-mate that he was going to do away with his sweet wife Susan, Brian thought.
Sitting in his apartment, Brian wondered if he had gone too far himself. "I knew this was too good to be true." He grabbed the sandwich and decided to dispose of both it and Kyle's meat-mate, but he knew as they were blood-bonded, it was impossible for him to willingly destroy the sandwich. "Shit! Kyle's cut! He's blood-bonded to his as well, and they're both held captive by his sandwich. He wasn't trying to be rude to me. His sandwich wanted him to make me leave. The only way out is for me to eat Kyle's sandwich and him to eat mine. He's so deep into this, I know he won't eat another man's sandwich though."
Over the next couple hours, Brian devised a plan to sneak into their home and incorporate small pieces of his sandwich into all of their food and of course, do Kyle the kindness of taking his sandwich out of the freezer and eating it for him.
He decided he needed to find out when they are having guests over next and incorporate it into their dishes then because they will be preparing enough food that he can spread it more easily amongst the dishes without getting noticed.
Unfortunately, as the weeks went by before they would have guests over, Brian's hand became infected, and the infection was worsening. It began to take on a repulsive smell, much like his sandwich, and the flesh of his hand was becoming discolored. He noticed this was what happened to the bun. It had also changed color over time.
In another week, Brian's whole body was aching. He was feverish and throwing up what little he had in his stomach. "The meat is fighting back. I need to act soon."
The next day, once his neighbors left for work, he broke in and immediately searched their freezer. Unable to find meat-mate, he started mixing pieces of his sandwich among the foods they had in the fridge. Now, all he needed to do was wait.
The next day, Brian woke up invigorated knowing he had been cleansed, but he looked down at his hand, and it had even gotten worse. More drastic measures needed to be taken. He figured his hand had already metamorphasized into more rotten pork meat than man. It was too late for his hand, but perhaps the rest of him could be saved. As his luck would have it, there was a community potluck for the apartment the following evening. He promptly signed up to bring peppermint pork.

I tried to open Gladius but when I hit start on the launcher it didn't load the game and read as the title says. When loading the Gladius.error report it showed this, can someone help fix the problem?
​
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\Gladius.exe --steam
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Gladius 1.12.1 "Firepower Pack" (^/trunk r11380P Release Windows-x86_64)
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Machine ID: 3d53354d178218cabe268f44924df997c4d617a57b61d513f679e126557764
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] User-preferred locale:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Current locale: *
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] User data path: \Documents\Proxy Studios\Gladius
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Detected 8 hardware threads.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC]
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Country Code: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Country Set: 1252
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Free Physical Memory: 2020 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Free Space In Paging Files: 12270 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Free Virtual Memory: 11641 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Last Boot Up Time: 20230607143742.500000-240
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Locale: 0409
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Name: Microsoft Windows 11 HomeC:\Windows\Device\Harddisk0\Partition4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Number Of Processes: 189
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Language: 1033
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Size Stored In Paging Files: 12582 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Total Virtual Memory Size: 20914 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Total Visible Memory Size: 8331 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:38 UTC] Operating System Version: 10.0.22000
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Availability: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Cpu Status: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Current Clock Speed: 3600 MHz
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Current Voltage: 11
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Device ID: CPU0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Ext Clock: 100 MHz
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Family: 107
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Load Percentage: 100%
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Max Clock Speed: 3600 MHz
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Name: AMD Ryzen 3 3100 4-Core Processor
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Number Of Cores: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Number Of Enabled Core: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Number Of Logical Processors: 8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Processor Id: 178BFBFF00870F10
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Processor 0 Thread Count: 8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Device ID: HDAUDIO\FUNC_01&VEN_10EC&DEV_0897&SUBSYS_1458A194&REV_1004\5&630BFEB&0&0001
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Name: High Definition Audio Device
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 0 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Device ID: ROOT\AMDSAFD&FUN_01&REV_01\0000
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Name: AMD Streaming Audio Device
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 1 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Device ID: HDAUDIO\FUNC_01&VEN_1002&DEV_AA01&SUBSYS_00AA0100&REV_1008\7&F10448C&0&0001
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Name: AMD High Definition Audio Device
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 2 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Device ID: ROOT\STEAMSTREAMINGMICROPHONE\0000
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Name: Steam Streaming Microphone
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 3 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Device ID: ROOT\STEAMSTREAMINGSPEAKERS\0000
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Name: Steam Streaming Speakers
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 4 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Availability: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Config Manager Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Device ID: ROOT\MEDIA\0000
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 DMA Buffer Size: 0 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Name: Oculus Virtual Audio Device
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Status: OK
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Sound Device 5 Status Info: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Adapter Compatibility: Advanced Micro Devices, Inc.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Adapter RAM: 4278 MB
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Availability: 8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Config Manager Error Code: 22
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Current Bits Per Pixel: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Current Refresh Rate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Device ID: VideoController1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Driver Version: 31.0.12027.9001
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Install Date: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Installed Display Drivers: C:\Windows\System32\DriverStore\FileRepository\u0390451.inf_amd64_39377efdd62734d1\B390182\aticfx64.dll,C:\Windows\System32\DriverStore\FileRepository\u0390451.inf_amd64_39377efdd62734d1\B390182\aticfx64.dll,C:\Windows\System32\DriverStore\FileRepository\u0390451.inf_amd64_39377efdd62734d1\B390182\aticfx64.dll,C:\Windows\System32\DriverStore\FileRepository\u0390451.inf_amd64_39377efdd62734d1\B390182\amdxc64.dll
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Last Error Code: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Max Refresh Rate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Min Refresh Rate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Name: AMD Radeon RX 6500 XT
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Status: Error
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Time Of Last Reset: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Video Architecture: 5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Video Memory Type: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Video Mode: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video Controller 0 Video Processor: AMD Radeon Graphics Processor (0x743F)
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Initializing distribution ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Steam profile name is .
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] [Steam] Initialized Steamworks.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Initializing configuration ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/AmbientVolume: 0.4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/CinematicVolume: 1.0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/EffectVolume: 0.25
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/HRTF: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/InterfaceVolume: 1.0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/MasterVolume: 1.0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/MaxAuxiliarySends: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/MaxCachedSources: 128
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/MusicVolume: 0.46
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/OutputDevice:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Audio/VoiceVolume: 1.0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cancel: Escape
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo0: Alt+1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo1: Alt+2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo2: Alt+3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo3: Alt+4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo4: Alt+5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo5: Alt+6
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo6: Alt+7
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo7: Alt+8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo8: Alt+9
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Cargo9: Alt+0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/Chat: Enter KPEnter
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ForceEndTurn: Control+Space
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/MarkTile: Control+MouseLeft
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/NextMusicTrack: Control+N
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/NextTask: Space
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/OK: Enter KPEnter Space
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/OpenCompendiumScreen: F1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/OpenQuestsScreen: F2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/OpenResearchScreen: F3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction0: Control+1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction1: Control+2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction2: Control+3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction3: Control+4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction4: Control+5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction5: Control+6
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction6: Control+7
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction7: Control+8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction8: Control+9
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/PlayerAction9: Control+0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/QuickLoad: F9
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/QuickSave: F5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ReloadModifiedResources: Control+R
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SaveJPGScreenShot: PrintScreen Control+P
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SaveJPGScreenShotWithoutHUD: Shift+PrintScreen Shift+Control+P
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SavePNGScreenShot: Alt+PrintScreen Control+Alt+P
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SavePNGScreenShotWithoutHUD: Shift+Alt+PrintScreen Shift+Control+Alt+P
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ScrollDown: ArrowDown
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ScrollLeft: ArrowLeft
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ScrollRight: ArrowRight
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ScrollUp: ArrowUp
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SelectNext: Tab
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/SelectPrevious: Shift+Tab
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleDebugPanel: Control+D
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleDisplayMode: Alt+Enter Alt+KPEnter
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleFPSDisplay: Control+F
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleHUD: Control+H
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleLoadScreen: Control+L
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleMixerPanel: Control+M
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleSaveScreen: Control+S
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleSettingsScreen: Control+E
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleStatsPanel: Control+T
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleUnitOverlay: Control+U
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/ToggleYieldOverlay: Control+Z
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction0: Q
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction1: W
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction10: Z
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction11: X
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction12: C
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction13: V
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction14: B
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction2: E
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction3: R
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction4: T
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction5: A
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction6: S
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction7: D
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction8: F
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitAction9: G
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem0: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem1: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem2: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem3: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem4: 5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem5: 6
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem6: 7
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem7: 8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem8: 9
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Controls/UnitItem9: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/AnimationSpeed: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/AutoCycleUnits: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/AutoSave: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/AutoSendReports: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/CurrentVersion: 1.12.1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/Debug: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ErrorReportSentAt: 1133930
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/Language: English
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/LastVersion: 1.12.1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ScrollAcceleration: 0.9
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ScrollSpeed: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ScrollToAction: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShowBarks: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShowCinematics: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShowPerformance: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShowSubtitles: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShowTips: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShownPatchNotes:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/ShownTips: 0,5,12,4,3,17,10,30,46,18,16,15,22,43,34,56,36,47,40,45,23,21,41,24,27,31,33,44,35,20,25,28,11,42,9,32,26,13,14,19,48,39,37
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/TerminateWithDisableMods: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/TerminateWithMarkContentCorrupt: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/TerminatedWithDisableMods: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] General/UserName:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Mods/Disabled:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Mods/Installed:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/ListenAddress: 0.0.0.XXX
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/ListenMaxClients: 40
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/ListenPort: 6120
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/PreferRelayedData: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/RemoteAddress: 127.0.0.XXX
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Network/RemotePort: 6120
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/AnisotropicFiltering: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/Brightness: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/CloudShadows: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/Contrast: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/DepthFog: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/DepthOfField: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/Device:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/DisplayMode: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/FXAA: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/FixedTimeOfDay: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/FixedTimeOfDayAt: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/FullScreenResolution: 3840x2160
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/GUIScale: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/Gamma: 0.5
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/MaxFocusedTickrate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/MaxMinimizedTickrate: 8
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/MaxUnfocusedTickrate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/Monitor:
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/MultiThreadedRendering: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/RefreshRate: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/ShadowQuality: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/ShowCliffHighlights: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/ShowGrid: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/TextureQuality: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/ValidationLayers: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/VerticalSynchronization: -1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/VideoMemory: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Video/WindowedResolution: 1366x768
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/AIControlDisconnectedPlayers: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/AdaptiveTurnTimer: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ArcticRegionDensity: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ArtefactDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/AvoidDuplicateRandomFactions: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/DesertRegionDensity: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Difficulty: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ForestDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/GameName: bob101
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/GameVisibility: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/HolySiteDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ImperialRuinsDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/JokaeroTraderEncampmentDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/LandMass: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/LordOfSkulls: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/MultiplayerMapEditor: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/NecronTombDensity: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/OrkoidFungusDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Pace: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Players: Teclis Blue,2,AstraMilitarum,1,Yriel Yellow,2,Random,2,Evil Sunz Scarlet,2,Random,0,Niblet Green,2,Random,0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Quests: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/RegionDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/RegionSize: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ResearchCost: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ResourceCost: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/ResourceUpkeep: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/RiverDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/RuinsOfVaulDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/SimultaneousTurns: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Size: 4
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/SpecialResourceDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/StartingResource: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement1: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement10: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement12: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement4: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement6: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/Supplement8: 1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/TropicalRegionDensity: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/TurnTimer: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/VolcanicRegionDensity: 3
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/WebwayGateDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/WildlifeDensity: 2
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] World/WireWeedDensity: 0
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Initializing data ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] [Steam] Found 0 subscribed mods.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Found 0 installed mods.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Loading colors ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Loading language ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:39 UTC] Initializing world ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Initializing network ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Initializing input ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Initializing video ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Set environment variable: DISABLE_LAYER_AMD_SWITCHABLE_GRAPHICS_1=1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Set environment variable: DISABLE_LAYER_NV_OPTIMUS_1=1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Set environment variable: DISABLE_TWITCH_VULKAN_OVERLAY=1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] [UPnP] Searching for UPnP devices on network ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:40 UTC] Set environment variable: DISABLE_VK_LAYER_VALVE_steam_fossilize_1=1
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:41 UTC] Available monitors: 1. Generic PnP Monitor
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:41 UTC] Available Vulkan layers: VK_LAYER_AMD_switchable_graphics, VK_LAYER_OW_OVERLAY, VK_LAYER_OW_OBS_HOOK, VK_LAYER_VALVE_steam_overlay, VK_LAYER_VALVE_steam_fossilize
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Monitor: 1. Generic PnP Monitor
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Display::setMonitor: 0.000063 s.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Available monitor resolutions: 640x480, 800x600, 1024x768, 1280x960, 1280x1024, 1920x1080, 3840x2160
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Desktop mode: 3840x2160 @ 64 Hz
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Creating window (Fullscreen 3840x2160 @ 0 Hz) ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Window created.
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Refresh rate: 64 Hz
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Window size: 3840x2160
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Framebuffer size: 3840x2160
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Viewport size: 3840x2160
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Creating Vulkan instance ...
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:44 UTC] Vulkan instance version: 1.3.204
ExceptionHandler::unhandledExceptionFilter()
3221225477 EXCEPTION_ACCESS_VIOLATION
(0) [0x00007FFD2D84C5E1] ?? (C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\SteamOverlayVulkanLayer64.dll)
(1) [0x000000359B94EDD0] ?? (C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\SteamOverlayVulkanLayer64.dll)
(2) [0x000000359B94EFD0] ?? (C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\SteamOverlayVulkanLayer64.dll)
(3) [0x00007FFCFFDCA8EF] vkResetFences + 0x000000000002C90F (C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\vulkan-1.dll)
(4) [0x0000016B000003FF] ?? (C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\Gladius.exe)
(5) [0x00000000FFFFFFF7] ?? (C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\Gladius.exe)
(6) [0x00007FFD4A447A1E] ?? (\AppData\Local\Overwolf\Extensions\ncfplpkmiejjaklknfnkgcpapnhkggmlcppckhcb\207.0.4\obs\data\obs-plugins\win-capture\ow-graphics-hook64.dll)
Modules loaded:
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\Gladius.exe
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\ntdll.dll
C:\Windows\System32\KERNEL32.DLL
C:\Windows\System32\KERNELBASE.dll
C:\Windows\System32\USER32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\win32u.dll
C:\Windows\System32\GDI32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\gdi32full.dll
C:\Windows\System32\msvcp_win.dll
C:\Windows\System32\ucrtbase.dll
C:\Windows\System32\SHELL32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\ole32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\combase.dll
C:\Windows\System32\RPCRT4.dll
C:\Windows\System32\OLEAUT32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\ADVAPI32.dll
C:\Windows\System32\msvcrt.dll
C:\Windows\System32\sechost.dll
C:\Windows\System32\WS2_32.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\vulkan-1.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\libpng16.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\avformat-58.dll
C:\Windows\System32\CRYPT32.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\avutil-56.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\libcrypto-1_1-x64.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\OpenAL32.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\libvorbisfile.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\libcurl.dll
C:\Windows\System32\WLDAP32.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\miniupnpc.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\tbbmalloc_proxy.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dbghelp.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\boost_locale-vc142-mt-x64-1_70.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\zlib.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\avcodec-58.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\steam_api64.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\MSWSOCK.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\MSVCP140.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\VCRUNTIME140_1.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\VCRUNTIME140.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\CFGMGR32.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\IPHLPAPI.DLL
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\bcrypt.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\WINMM.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\tbbmalloc.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\USERENV.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\libvorbis.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\CRYPTBASE.DLL
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\swresample-3.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\EOSSDK-Win64-Shipping.dll
C:\Windows\System32\Normaliz.dll
C:\Windows\System32\WINTRUST.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\Secur32.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\VERSION.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\WINHTTP.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\SSPICLI.DLL
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamapps\common\Warhammer 40000 Gladius - Relics of War\Binaries\Windows-x86_64\freetype.dll
C:\Windows\System32\IMM32.DLL
C:\Windows\system32\dxgi.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\CRYPTSP.dll
C:\Windows\system32\rsaenh.dll
C:\Windows\System32\bcryptPrimitives.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\ncrypt.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\NTASN1.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\MSASN1.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\gameoverlayrenderer64.dll
C:\Windows\System32\PSAPI.DLL
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\windows.storage.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\wintypes.dll
C:\Windows\System32\SHCORE.dll
C:\Windows\System32\shlwapi.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\profapi.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\PROPSYS.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\kernel.appcore.dll
C:\Windows\System32\clbcatq.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\amsi.dll
C:\Program Files\McAfee\WPS\1.9.253.XXX\mc-sec-plugin-x64.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\steamclient64.dll
C:\Windows\System32\imagehlp.dll
C:\Windows\System32\SETUPAPI.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\tier0_s64.dll
C:\Program Files (x86)\Steam\vstdlib_s64.dll
C:\Windows\System32\NSI.dll
C:\Windows\system32\uxtheme.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dhcpcsvc6.DLL
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\DNSAPI.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dhcpcsvc.DLL
C:\Program Files\Bonjour\mdnsNSP.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dinput8.dll
C:\Windows\System32\rasadhlp.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\xinput1_4.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\DEVOBJ.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\inputhost.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\CoreMessaging.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dwmapi.dll
C:\Windows\System32\fwpuclnt.dll
C:\Windows\System32\MSCTF.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\HID.DLL
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\dxcore.dll
C:\Windows\system32\schannel.DLL
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\mskeyprotect.dll
C:\Windows\system32\ncryptsslp.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\textinputframework.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\directxdatabasehelper.dll
C:\Windows\SYSTEM32\ntmarta.dll
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Starting ErrorReporter ...
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[2023-Jun-07 20:05:45 UTC] [UPnP] http://192.168.1.XXX:8060/ upnp:rootdevice
[2023-Jun-07 20:05:45 UTC] [UPnP] http://192.168.1.XXX:8060/ upnp:rootdevice
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[2023-Jun-07 20:05:45 UTC] [UPnP] http://192.168.1.XXX:9080 upnp:rootdevice
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[2023-Jun-07 20:05:46 UTC] UPnP.cpp:58: void __cdecl proxy::network::UPnP::initialize(void): Warning: [UPnP] No valid IGD could be connected to: 3.
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[2023-Jun-07 20:05:46 UTC] Creating error log: \Documents\Proxy Studios\Gladius\Logs\Gladius.error.log ...

Advent Home
trigger warnings
rape, suicide, physical abuse, emotional abuse.
https://www.wvgazettemail.com/news/legal_affairs/more-former-students-sue-over-alleged-abuse-at-boarding-school/article_db70c152-c8db-5711-82dc-52e3d26303ab.html
chrome-extension://efaidnbmnnnibpcajpcglclefindmkaj/https://www.courthousenews.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/WEST-VIRGINIA.pdf
note: Several organizations share a name with the Advent Home. I am specifically referring to the now defunct group home near Calhoun, Tennessee.
We talk a lot today about trauma in a way I don't remember it being discussed even in the broader cultural consciousness when I was young. Mental health was just viewed differently. Adventists have always had a weird relationship with mental health, but I think rarely more strange and harmful than the ideas of Dr. Senior and the Advent home. Through most of this I will use fake names but as Dr. Senior's name is intrinsically and publicly tied to the school he is my one exception. Also, if any reading this had the misfortune of also attending the school, you will know we were told to call him Dr. B or Dr. Blondel but we are adults and his title was Dr. Senior.
I've wanted to write about this for some time and this will likely be a first draft of a larger discussion. Psychology isn't my field of expertise and I've never felt I found the right platform to talk about such a niche subject but finding the Ex Adventist sub and with more being said about mental health I at least feel qualified to discuss where I feel Adventism was used to twist psychology into something harmful by Dr. Senior.
Before I continue, I wasn't there for the worst of what was to happen nor did I receive the worst of what happened in my time there. I also cannot entirely claim innocence of some of the emotional bullying that was tolerated if not encouraged. I hope I have grown since then and have learned from mistakes I made when I was 13 and do believe I am largely innocent of the physical bullying and certainly the sexual assault.
First, I want to address the lawsuit. As I say, I wasn't there for most of this as by 2014 the Advent Home and Miracle Meadows seem to have become much more closely related, swapping students to hide them from law enforcement and deposition. The school closed around 2014 , the time a lawsuit was filed. More lawsuits have since been filed and the director of the sister school miracle meadows was imprisoned. I will link the lawsuit and articles above. As the events detailed in it represent a massive escalation from what was happening while I was there, but I do think the events described are merely the codification of the policies being unofficially implemented on a smaller scale in my time. In short it lays out regular forced sexual assault by students and staff, duct taping students in rooms for days if they were violent and forcing them to study the bible for days at a time as punishment. Thinking back, I can see how the deference to authority and refusal to treat mental health as anything other than a religious failing could lead to the behavior detailed in these allegations. To be clear I am linking the allegation and articles below though I wasn't part of any of these trials and don't know which charges exactly stuck.
Even though the school is closed and from what I can tell Dr. Senior is retired, I think there is a larger discussion to be had about how the Adventist Church handles mental health and firebrands. So, what was the Advent Home? The Advent Home was a young men's reform school begun by Dr. Blondel Senior in Calhoun, Tennessee. There isn't much left to find on it as it shut down around 2014 and never had a great online presence. I suspect a lawsuit around the same time was to blame, as, if any of its allegations were proven, it would have cost the advent home, Dr Senior, and the conference a lot of money and embarrassment. More on this later.
The Advent Home advertised a range of services from treating ADHD and general misbehavior to serious developmental disorders and outright criminals. Basicall, he wanted it to be everything from a more structured middle school to a juvenile detention center, and predictably, it would fail at both.
I don't know how my mom found out about the Advent Home, but I know her reasons for sending me. A nasty divorce between my parents caused me to lose interest in schoo, so I barely passed 8th grade, and I had started listening to Eminem. That's it. it seems so laughably tame but that's all it took for Dr. Senior to be able to convince my mom that this behavior would escalate and the only recourse was his school which was built on and advertised correction through a strict adherence to Adventist principles. Every student came with fundamentally different problems. Some, like me were struggling scholastically while several had been ordered there by courts for violent offenses and several had what I cannot give another name other than a complete stall in mental development (one student thought and acted like a toddler, mentally and emotionally well below his age).
We were all, however, given the same treatment regimen, Maturation Therapy. This I will argue is the root of the problem. Dr. Senior claimed to have gotten his PHD in psychology from the University of Jamaica. I am not going to cast aspersions on this institution, but if he did have this degree he missed some crucial lessons and did not keep up on developments in the field. Dr. Senior had identified 70 ideals he believed every young man should emulate as he matures. I could not possibly list them, but they ranged from keeping a clean room, respect for staff to whether you used harsh language to how often you prayed. These would have made for fine rules for a religious correctional facility, but this was the entire treatment plan. Each of the 70 points would have you ranked 1-5, and you graduated by achieving a 4.5 average. 230 points overall. An important note here is all of these points were external. There was no mention of healing trauma or discussion of past actions. We were seen as immature children and by forcing mature behavior our other issues would right themselves. Right? In short, Dr. Seniors idea of therapy was entirely about becoming presentable, respect for authority, and respect for God. I want to go through these because in each I see a failing not only of the school but Adventism's handling of mental health in general. Also while I cannot speak to the lawsuit I will be linking it below as I believe sexual assault survivors and I want to say what these points contribute to how this environment may have developed.
His entire idea of personal growth was based on becoming outwardly his idea of a respectable man. He was willing to cross any number of boundaries violating others' religious taboos, disregarding the desires of the parents and showing no interest in the students as individuals. We were broken and needed only to be put in his mold and recast. One student was Rastafarian and his father wrote a letter explaining their faith and why he shouldn't cut his hair. His father had barely left town when the boy was forced to get his hair shorn off. Our 'civilian' clothes were confiscated on arrival and sorted for how appropriate he felt they were. Anything he didn't like we would get back when we left. I never did. As for speech we were strictly regulated on what words we could say. Cuss words, and even adjacent words like darn, would result in a loss of points and thus longer before we would be able to go home. Instead of psychological healing, his priority was always to make us look healed on the outside.
The most egregious example of this was a boy I will call Zach. Zach had a severe developmental disorder that in my opinion Dr. Senior was woefully ill-equipped to treat but that never dulled his confidence. Because of his neurodivergence Zach was habitually unpresentable. Zach would frequently have food dripped down his shirt, throw temper tantrums in public areas and speak loudly about bodily functions that would have been amusing from a four year old but Zach was almost 14 and just beginning puberty if you get my meaning. At every turn, Zach was not met with treatment but ridicule. To the Advent Home staff, he wasn't sick, he was misbehaved and punished severely for it. We all had to run up to 3 laps of 1/3 of a mile as discipline regularly, but Zach's condition often racked him up more laps than could be humanly run. at one point, a new staff member refused to allow Zach to eat at all until he completed a number of laps I doubt would be humanly possible, let alone for a confused neurodivergent. One of the proudest moments of my life is that I stood up for Zach and pointed out, whatever punishment was meted out, food was an illegal method of punishment in the state. My shame, however, is how often I joined in the ridicule and bullying of Zach when the staff made punishments for his misbehavior punishments for all of us. As I say, I hope I have grown.
Dr. Senior saw scruffiness and cultural differences very much the way the Dursleys from Harry Potter did. These were not the markers of young men expressing themselves or of cultural differences but of moral failings to be stamped out or hidden until they faded into normalcy. We didn't need to discover ourselves, we needed to learn the joy of conformity
The real problems would come with his reliance on authoritative structures. Both the staff and students had clear hierarchies within them. New students would be Group Members, GM, while you could be promoted to Assistant Group Leader, AGL, a Group Leader, GL, with a possible Super Group Leader SGL at the top All leaders had the authority to report misbehavior and physically restrain violent students. Here, we start to see the problems. What constituted violent behavior was entirely up to the authority figure, and unless there were witnesses who ranked equally, Dr. Senior would implicitly believe the higher ranked individual. Keep in mind that some of these kids had real criminal records, and as I've established, we were not getting our problems treated.
I want to use one student as an example. I'll give him a fake name (James) as I hope he's reformed and also should not be judged entirely on his actions when he was 16 but these are actions I either witnessed or saw the fall out of so believer their veracity. I was walking by him one day. he had been given a job he didn't want to do. Instead, he was sitting talking to a group he bullied but passed for his friends. He called out to me to do the job for him. I laughed and kept walking. he took offense and deciding I had disrespected him, chased me down, hit me, tackled me into the gravel road, and held me there until I begged to be released. Those words; I beg you to release me. I was cut, bruised, crying and bleeding. James was unharmed, but when I told Dr. Senior, he believed James because he was a group leader and I a lowly Group member.
One of the students who had been sitting on the steps with James, who I will call Sam, would get caught performing oral sex on James only a few months later. James assured Dr. Senior Sam had asked practically begged to do it, and here again, James authority had him taken at this word. They both received punishment, but Sam got the lion's share as he had initiated and must be gay. I firmly believe James pressured Sam into this, and likely not just this once.
Dr. Senior said the word "manipulative" more than anyone i have ever known. often as we lowly students tried to explain actions or avoid discipline for petty offences, he would accuse us of manipulating. In hindsight, this is how he viewed the relationship between those with power and those without. There were those the system had put in power and those below who now would try to manipulate those who had the power. from the bottom of the ladder, he was incapable of seeing sincerity or pain. only manipulation. To be clear, I don't know how much of the reality reached Dr. Senior's ears, but enough had to he had to be actively ignoring warning signs in favor of authority. I talk about this to show how Dr. Senior felt strongly that respect for authority was essential regardless how abusive the authority figure might be. Hold on to that too.
The final point is religion. It should not need said, but Dr. Senior wanted all of us studying the bible and practicing a very conservative faith even for SDA. This is fine(ish), but he also believed that Christ had predictable healing powers and that mental health was only a failing of the individual to have the faith necessary for healing.
We were all encouraged to discontinue any medications we might be taking. For me, with ADHD and Ritalin this was probably fine, but for one student with borderline schizophrenia this led to several violent episodes he was blamed for despite the staff convincing him to get off his meds. A diabetic student was eventually pulled from the program after his 4th hospitalization when he was allowed to opt out of his insulin/ blood sugar checker. Christ, as a placebo alongside medicine, is silly but fine, but as a replacement for lifesaving drugs, it can have dangerous consequences, and Dr. Senior refused to see this. In Dr Senior's mind, I believe, these boys weren't sick, they were failing to let Jesus in to heal them and that's what needed to change.
Furthermore, behavioral incidents were often met with explicitly Christiaan remedies. Issues of bullying and cursing would require not time out but a scripture reading. sometimes alone sometimes publicly, along with a public admission of what we did. This was done at a weekly meeting when Dr. Senior came down from his literal house on the hill to play mediator and in no metaphorical sense moral arbiter of our actions. in essence, he got to play God for 2 hours a week.
The most heinous example of the use of religion however was, Mr. V who I believe saw jail time. This man was a thousand walking red flags. He went to boys' rooms to pray alone, and he insisted on a separate bible study with a group of boys he was particularly close to. Outwardly, however, he was fanatically religious, and this was enough to assuage Dr. Senior of concerns. Mr. V was the guy who when the pastor said kneel for prayer he would stand with his arms to heaven, when the pastor asked for a moment of silent reflection he would exclaim AMEN! every five seconds, He played moral police intervening in behavioral issues after considering a matter settled if a student agreed to a private prayer session (yup, nothing sus here). Dr, Senior employed and sung the praises of Mr. V's work even as this concerning behavior began to escalate to the point that some students, formerly in his inner circle, began to actively distance themselves from him but were unwilling to discuss why.
Dr. Senior could not, however, ignore when Mr. V took a kid off campus without telling anyone to a small mountain cabin to "diet" for three days. Only once the police were involved could Mr. V. 's behavior no longer be ignored and his religious authority be given priority. If you are wondering Mr. V gets a fake name because, while I am telling the truth to the best of my knowledge, we were never told the full story. The student in question was withdrawn before he was willing to talk about it, and Mr. V was not seen again. I don't know what he was charged with or what stuck but I think we can put the pieces together.
Fortunately, other than some more bullying and getting through a nasty flu with nothing more than pepper water as medicine, I graduated. Yeah, shocker, he also didn't like doctors. The shock of seeing how normal people practiced Adventism after a year of this cult like fanaticism has a lot to do with why I'm on this sub and not the SDA sub, but I got off easy. For the criminals and really troubled kids recidivism was high, with several being in a proper prison weeks or months after. Several would turn around and be back at the Advent Home in months because the behavior never stopped, they just learned to act like it did. But the real harm was a boy I'll call Dan. He had depression when he arrived, it was never treated but pushed down. He pushed it down so far he became the best of us. he was very nice and a bit of a mentor to me. he worked hard and became SGL (the highest one remember) with one of the highest scores that an Advent home graduate had had. One year after leaving the school, he committed suicide by diving into an empty pool. Only then, did I realize he wasn't fine. He was never fine. He had mastered acting fine. The furthest I got in Psychology was a single college course and some youtubers (and the small bit of real therapy I've had) but even with this, I can see how Dr. Senior was out of step with the psychological practices even of the early 2000s. He was so much more focused on appearance and behavior than he was ever interested in the root cause, his system often became a new trauma rather than treating an old one. An excessive respect for authority led to abusive behavior being overlooked if not encouraged, and Jesus was treated in a professional setting as a supreme healer despite real medical issues. I saw these issues in the church I left, and my mom and extended family still practice in. This is why I really feel compelled to write this. People like Dr. Senior may seem like an Adventist version of Godwin's law. "Oh, yeah? If we can look at Jesus to heal, it'll end up like the Advent Home!" (Or Miracle Meadows) I know this sentence has never been uttered by anyone but me and maybe Sam, hope you're ok buddy, but the fact is Dr. Senior is the end stage of the ideas put into their most harmful practice, and some like Dan paid with their life.
Finally, through all of this, I remember how Dr. Senior was treated by outsiders. Entire churches prayed for his good work to continue, meetings were held for him to teach others to copy his program, he was featured multiple times in the herald and other Adventist publications. Like Mr. V his religiosity was a shield despite all the red flags, and like Mr. V he was given the respect and admiration that came with his position all the way up until there were consequences. It isn't that no one could see there were problems. He flew his red flags high. Its that the church didn't want to see the problem and didn't care until the outside world took action.
Please, if you take anything from this, look out for your SDA relatives who struggle with mental health. The church sure won't. But on a larger note, I hope this to be part of a larger discussion about bringing awareness to the churches failing on mental health and how they overlook monsters in their ranks who just haven't embarrassed them yet. Dr. Senior never sexually assaulted a kid as far as I'm aware, but he enabled and protected abusers in service of pushing his ideology all while the church sang his praises. Disclaimer: At no point in this do I feel I deliberately lied or exaggerated, but these are 20 year old memories of a traumatized 13 year old who was never given the full story. I tried to leave hearsay out, but I did find out what happened to Dan through the grapevine, though from someone I believe completely. If there are minor inaccuracies, I do apologize, but I believe I have been accurate in the larger points.
Names are changed for obvious reasons, though my change style switched cause I am bad at coming up with names when stressed, my D&D group will confirm, and this is stressful to write about even now.
The Advent Home I attended is shut and a very attractive hotel now. My research showed he partnered closely with miracle meadows, which is also now shut. If by chance Dr. Senior is still practicing somewhere, or has appointed a successor, please persuade family to look closely and critically at his practices before signing anything. He used to complain kids were manipulative but, as with all projectors, he was the master manipulator. He convinced people to consent to incredible things. I believe everyone can change if they want and as far as I know he had the education to do good work. Instead, he chose to ignore that education in service of his biases. Unless he has updated his treatment, please at the very least accompany his work with another well regarded psychologist.

As day turned to dusk, the reality of the situation Mike had found himself in was starting to dawn on him. It was already established he was in monster central, and in another world, and alone, and had no idea what was going on around him, but after the initial need of not getting spotted and probably mauled was satisfied, a whole new slew of problems were arrayed before him. Where would he eat? Drink? Sleep? If he injured himself, where could he get medical supplies? Where was he going? How could he get back home?
Could he get back home?
A stiff wind blew around him and stole the heat from his body, leaving him cold in an encroaching dark. 'How do I know I can even get back?' besides knowing it existed, Mike knew nothing about magic. He was fairly certain that kobold had sent him back the first time, but by the looks of it they had also summoned him in the first place. Something else pulled him in the second time, so there was a very real chance that he wouldn't be able to do anything. 'and of course, that all comes before the fact I have no idea how to find the little lizard.' Mike ducked into an alley to avoid some kind of flying fish as he considered his situation. Hopeless as it was, finding a needle in a haystack was the only option to present itself, so he reluctantly chose his only option.
Things hit an all time low as Michael sat under a bridge that would serve as his shelter for the night. Sure, there were plenty of haunted houses to choose from, but they all ran the risk of him being found by the monsters that lived in monster city. The bridge was a solid piece of work, being composed mostly of concrete and some kind of wood, and it passed over a wide river that was pretty turbulent for its size. Mike was suprised by the lack of metal, but it seemed to be holding up well enough so he let it go.
Slinging off his backpack, Michael decided to occupy himself by taking stock of his inventory and situation. Laying everything out, he had:
The gym clothes he was wearing, just a tee shirt and shorts. They were sweaty, dirty and didn't cover much
His regular clothes, thick jeans, another tee shirt and an over shirt
His phone, which had no service and 67% battery life. 'yeah, let's turn on airplane mode and the battery saver.' it wouldn't last long, but the calculator, flashlight, stopwatch, notepad and compass tools could all be useful.
Earphones, 'ha! I downloaded all my songs and can listen to them forever if I find a charger! Suck on that Spotify elitists!'
Shoes, nothing special about them
A bag of chocolates that monsters think they're too good for
An almost empty water bottle. 'pro tip, if you're lost in the desert, conserve sweat, not water.' Remembering that bit of survival trivia, he downed the last few gulps.
His pocket knife, score! The salesman had told him this thing could withstand his own weight on the blade, and Mike had really put it through its paces to confirm that claim. It was also a swiss army knife and had several tools in it, even a firestarter! That alone tripled his chances out here.
His wallet, full of useless bills, coins and cards
A gym membership, also useless
Ankle and wrist weights, with detachable pieces of metal to change the weight. 'Should I keep these on or off?' On one hand, he would like to be as physically capable as possible for whatever was coming, and the constant work out would only help with that, but on the other, they would slow him down and tire him out. Not good without a food source. He took them off for now.
And a gym bag, which is always good to have.
The first thing Mike did was change back onto his normal clothes. They would keep him a little warmer and weren't so smelly, which would be good for werewolves that might sniff him out. Walking down to the river, it seemed clear, so he filled his bottle - he could always not drink it later - and began washing the gym clothes.
As he scrubbed his mind moved onto the situation he was in. Another world, monsters, magic and local superpowers are all established. Judging by the state of things, that being the ruins and monsters, this was probably once a thriving nation that had since been overrun and was now populated with the monsters that did so. The biggest concern that came out of that was that this clearly hadn't been a medieval society. True, just about everything was alien to him but he could recognize a TV screen or a car, this place was just as if not more advanced than earth, and they still got wiped out by monsters.
As Mike started wringing out his shorts, his introspection was interrupted when he heard voices overhead. He immediately stopped and turned his head up. It was getting dark by now and whatever was above him had a light, he couldn't understand what the two, no three voices were saying, but he didn't like the tone or the fact that the light source seemed to be getting closer to the side of the bridge. He tensed, and slowly put his sopping clothes into his bag as quietly as he could.
With a loud grunt, whoever has the light jumped over the edge of the bridge, still out of view behind a support but that was as close as he was willing to get. Mike took off as fast as he could in the opposite direction of the ravine the bridge crossed. The ones still on the bridge pulled out another light and called out to the one on the ground, who growled a response back. 'crap, crap, crap!' rang through Mike's head as he put on more speed, the sounds of pursuit not far behind. Between the weights and wet clothes, Michael was worried he might have to ditch his bag again, but it wasn't weighing him down nearly as much as the thought it should. 'just wish adrenaline would come this easy at the gym!' he was making good speed all things considered and was glad to hear his pursuer falling behind.
His hopes of escape were shattered however as one of them proved able to fly, because he heard a screech overhead and saw a silhouette giving away his position! Come on, that's not fair! He had to lose the little cheater and soon, otherwise the others could just run him down at their leisure! Mike turned, slipping on the grassy turf as he aimed to go back in the city. If the universe would just throw him a bone for once, there wouldn't be many other monsters, and he could shake these jerks.
He ducked into an alley, left onto a street before swinging behind some buildings again. Looking up he could still see that cheeky little spy plane was still on him, and from the sounds of the voices, the ones on foot were taking a direct route instead of weaving around, they were closing in. Thanking the universe for actually not putting other monsters in his way, Mike ducked into another alley and saw what he was looking for; a dumpster (he assumed) right under an open window. The only issue was the chain link fence between him and it. 'Really though, who sets up a fence right in an alley like this?' another call from above reminded him of his situation. 'right, deal with it now, ponder neighbors who probably hated each other later.' despite his dismay at the obstacle, he practically leapt over the fence, which was at least 6 feet tall. Adrenaline was one hell of a drug, but there was no way he could do that!
He mentally stored that away as well as he hopped on the dumpster and into the window, waited a couple seconds and hopped back out. He couldn't see the spy anymore which meant they couldn't see him either. He just managed to crawl down a basement window of a building on the other side of the alley before his pursuers burst into the alley as well.
Watching through the window, Michael finally got a good look at the one on foot. That was a big guy, like 8 feet tall and built like a truck kind of big. He was the one with the light in his hand, a glowing ball that floated in his palm, and it cast a rather terrifying shadow over his crocodilian face. He was a crocodile man, no other way about it. Thick tail, heavy green scales that are more yellow on the underside, whatever you're imagining is probably right. The teeth didn't look too sharp but they made up for that in size and number. Besides, if he was anything like earth crocs he had enough bite force to make gums probably work.
Mike was thanking his lucky stars he hadn't been caught when suddenly a second head popped out from behind the first, and he realized the croc had a bucket strapped to his back with something poking out of it. After a bit of chatter, a second creature slithered out of the bucket and onto the ground. It was... Strange to say the least.
The creature stood at four feet tall, and was clearly an aquatic being, being covered in fins from head to toe to tail, along with burgundy scales so small he might've mistaken them for skin. Looking at its head it was decidedly a moray, with a mouth full of sharp teeth and an eels... Tail? Body? Let's say tail, coming out of the back of its head. Or would it be a humanoid body coming out of the moray's neck? 'This thing is weird to look at! Why do you need two bodies!?' Michael mentally screamed at the merfolk. He was just getting a grip on his mental image of it when the merfolk threw a wrench into his poor brains attempt to understand it, by flying. Well ok it wasn't flying flying, but with a little hop and spreading its wing-like fins it was able to glide along while hardly touching the ground. 'well this just keeps getting less and less fair.'
A call from above, undoubtedly from their flier, probably told Mr. Crocodile that Mike was in the building that he double backed out of, because his made some growling sounds of their own before he and the merfolk entered in through the window. Mike released a breath he hadn't even realized he was holding and took a look around the room he was in. It was dark in here, with only a bit of light coming from the twilight of a single window, but he could see place was almost empty, with little more than the occasional rug or bit of furniture that had been strewn about and a bit of debris by the stairs.
Seeing his way out, he ran to the stairs before noticing that there was more debris in the way than he saw in the dark. Turning on the flashlight on his phone, his hopes were dashed as he saw that the upper floor had caved in, blocking his access out. He hadn't seen the flier come down to enter the other building, so they were most likely keeping overwatch in case he tried to give them the slip, which he already kinda had, but he needed to make the same trick to work twice, and that always goes well.
Peeking out the window, Mike caught sight of what he assumed to be the flier making rounds overhead. There were only a few seconds on the far side that line of sight was broken, not enough time to run, but there were other hiding spots. Taking a chance, Mike crawled back out of the window as soon as the flier was out of sight and hopped into the confirmed dumpster. It was around now that he realized he didn't exactly have a plan, and his situation wasn't exactly improved either. 'I'm just making sure that I'm not cornered in case they find me. Yeah that's it!' now he had a plan, and his situation had improved too! Sort of, stop asking questions. A few seconds later he was out and under a shutter, and on the next loop he was out of the alley.
Turns out, it's not that easy. Mike had thought he was safe, after rounding a corner he ran until he was sure he'd lost them, only to hear more footsteps from behind. The flier must have seen him and Mr Croc was in pursuit again, at least Mike had enough of a lead he couldn't see them yet. Testing a theory, Mike found a balcony and jumped for it. Yep! Lower gravity was confirmed as he made it nearly two meters off the ground! He also undershot it and smacked his head on the underside of the balcony, eliciting a (hopefully) dignified shriek, ruining the momentous occasion. Still, he was able to hit the ground running and made for another escape.
It had not taken long for a pattern to establish, Mike would hide and lose pursuit only to be spotted by the flier as soon as he got any distance. His best bet was, somehow, to stay close, under the radar so to speak and lead them away. He wasn't sure how they always knew what direction he was in, considering how well he kept out of sight, until he saw Mr. Croc kneel down and sniff a footprint. Ahh, they were tracking him.
That might actually be a blessing in disguise, because they were moving from an abandoned looking residential area to an industrial complex that was more populated, seeing a bit of foot traffic and lights in windows. He just might be able to lose them in there. Mike had a bit of a laugh at the fact that monsters were living on a jobsite when there were some perfectly fine - ok dilapidated, but so is everything else - houses a few streets over. He snapped his attention back to the situation at hand, he was still being chased after all, and now he planned on escaping by walking through Monster City night life. 'how did I let this become my best option?' there was nothing for it though, he just had to hope he could still keep out of sight.
After a couple close calls where Mike had turned a corner only to see a wall or monsters that somehow hadn't noticed him, he got enough of a lead that he could try hiding. Finding a road with hundreds of footprints up and down it, he backtracked a few meters before diving behind a couple pipes that were sticking out of a building.
Mr. Croc showed up not long after with the eel in tow, and signed the flier to come down. He could finally see that dirty little spy plane! It was a... Moth! 3 feet tall with big black eyes, droopy antennae and some soft looking fluff on its head and body, Mike would have thought it adorable if it hadn't been snitching on him!
Being unfamiliar with monsterese, Mike had no idea what was being said, but the body language made it clear they were arguing. It actually looked like a parent scolding their children, with Mr. Croc being 8 feet tall while the others were in the 3-4 foot range. That didn't stop fire being flung both ways as the small pair clearly gave the kind of back talk that would have gotten the taste slapped out of Michael's mouth if he tried it on his dad. With someone saying something the conversation suddenly came to an end with Mr. Croc spitting on the ground and turning away. He fiddled with a latch on his chest and the bucket on his back came loose, hitting the eel on the head and soaking it, undoubtedly on purpose. With a few snide remarks the three went their ways, leaving Mike gracefully alone.
...In the middle of monster city.
Why did the universe insist on not improving the situation? 'Ok that wasn't fair universe, you're trying very hard, and I appreciate you getting me out of that.'
Karmatic retribution for his insolent thoughts hopefully averted, Mike got moving again.
.
Much to his own chagrin and with a hint of irony, Mike found himself tailing Mr Croc. Looking back it was ridiculous that nobody had noticed him running through the streets but he was found squatting under a bridge. Mr. Croc clearly had a reputation of some kind, because people seemed to avoid him like the plague. When Mike tried to backtrack he found himself relatively surrounded by monsters compared to the empty streets he was chased through, and he ended up finding sanctuary in the invisible bubble of Mr. Croc's presence, causing no end of irritation on Mike's end.
.
After nearly an hour of following, Michael's blood was boiling. Maybe because it was due to the lack of sleep, maybe it was due to being chased for hours for no reason, maybe it was due to being forced to hang around his least favourite semi-aquatic reptile. Or maybe it was because he was witnessing a mugging.
While sneaking along behind his quary, Mike did his best to hang back aways and keep an eye out for an escape route. They were still in the industrial complex, but must have been leaving the populated area, judging by the fact that fewer and fewer monsters were coming out after the crocodile had passed. Michael was just about ready to finally get away from him when he spotted someone walking in their direction, clearly having missed the memo to stay away.
The Croc was on them in a flash and the old bird -that's not an insult, she had feathers and a beak- tried to run but didn't get more than a couple steps away before the Croc had gotten a hold of her. Michael watched from the shadows as the bird lady was shaken, growled at and nearly had her head taken off by the snapping maw of an Egyptian god who had a chip on his shoulder. She was panicked, trying to run and begging, but the actual monster had her arm in a firm grip, and with his other hand he grabbed a pouch of some kind of the lady before shoving her onto the ground and walking away like nothing happened.
Michael was fuming. All that just to snatch a purse!? This thug who had chased him all throughout town, acted like he owned the place, who could probably rip Mike in half, did all that over a freaking handbag! His anger froze cold as the victim slowly picked herself up. Now that she wasn't being actively assaulted he could see she really was an old bird, with patches of feathers, wrinkles, generally frail looking, he was looking at someone's grandmother! And that crocodile... No, he would not get away with this!
.
Michael's anger had been subdued by the realization of what he was doing, now tailing the 8-foot lizard man a lot closer than before and armed with a pocket knife, one that felt a lot smaller in his hand as he realized what he was doing, he wasn't sure how to actually do this. The bastard deserved what was coming, but after cooling off Mike knew rushing in was a bad idea. Luckily this industrial complex, or whatever it was, was packed with rails, pipes, and other things so tightly there was practically a second road overhead. Mike's plan, if you could call it that, was to jump down onto the guy and take him out before he even knew what was happening.
Michael barely made a sound as he went up and over, stopping only when his target looked around. It seemed he could tell something was off, but wasn't ready to act on the feeling just yet, which wasn't the kind of opportunity that Mike was one to waste. He dropped, silent as a shadow.
The crocodile may have been 8 feet tall, built like a brick and was in a lower gravity setting, but the simple fact was that he wasn't ready for someone to suddenly land on his neck. He went down like a sack of potatoes with Mike clinging on, the tumble having left him momentarily disoriented. Still, he quickly righted himself, this needed to end fast, or it would turn into an actual fight where he would have the disadvantage. Wrapped around the monster's head Michael brought the knife to its neck and... Hesitated. Mike had been in fights before, but those were scuffles in the school yard, now he was about to kill. He knew his opponent deserved nothing less, but that seemed to fade in the face of taking a life. It was enough to take the fire out of him.
And so, instead of pushing the blade into his windpipe he only pressed it to the Crocs neck instead. "Alright listen up you big bastard," but the big bastard did not listen up, a fact made clear when a large hand grabbed and threw him off. Mike rolled as he landed and quickly got his feet back under him, knife luckily still in hand. The croc slowly stood up, cracking his neck as he did so before speaking. "Ev'uoy tsuj edam ym yad." It said with a toothy grin. Mike just glared from his crouched position. 'different language, nice to know I wasted my time!' kind of obvious in retrospect, but there's nothing for it now. Mike kept low to the ground, with a two foot difference in height he wouldn't even try to match his opponent in strength or reach, so he opted to keep low.
The Croc tensed for a moment before lunging at Mike, maw open and ready to swallow him whole. Mike lunged himself, keeping low to the ground and barely ducked under the attack and swiped at the exposed neck. He didn't expect to land the hit, but his opponent was taken off guard by his offence and didn't quite pull back fast enough, taking a superficial cut below the chin. Shock flashed in the croc's eyes and he lept back, lashing out with claws to keep Mike at bay. Unfortunately for him, Michael knew that playing fair was for suckers, and that you kick opponents when they're down, so he didn't let up. He was moving forward before the Croc had even landed, stayed below the counter and was in his guard again.
This time he didn't hesitate, and plunged his knife in the croc's side eliciting a shocked gasp from the titan and, keeping his momentum, moved just beside his opponent's shoulder before jumping just a little higher than intended and striking again. Still reeling from the first stab, the croc had only managed to make eye contact as Michael's knife sought his throat again, and this time did not stop. Michael landed on his feet as the croc sunk to his knees, blood leaking freely from his neck as he tried to stop the bleeding with his bare hands but it was already done. The crocodile was dead before he hit the ground, and Michael breathed a sigh of relief.
.
That purse wasn't the only property Mr. Croc had appropriated, as Michael found plenty of interesting things on his person. His things now, as he had no way of returning them. Despite the haul, his mind was elsewhere as he walked.
That guy did not know how to fight, probably used to just intimidating people around him. When an actual fight came he was honestly kinda sluggish, and didn't even think to use magic or the shiv that was in his pocket. Even so, that was a dumb thing to do. What was he thinking, attacking someone like that? What if he had known what he was doing!? Mike could not afford these kinds of mistakes in a survival situation, even if he did get lucky, even if he somehow got out unscathed! You just don't rely on that happening, and Michael resolved to remember that in the future.
Finding a good spot, he set the purse down in the middle of a road and retreated to a hiding place. Soon enough the bird lady passed by even slower than before, the only reason Mike got ahead of her was because she was slowly limping along. Seeing that made his hatred flare up again, but his anger faded away as with a shocked look, the bird lady found the purse, looked inside and sagged with visible relief before looking around suspiciously and continuing with just a bit more pep in her step. 'Well,' Mike thought, 'maybe that wasn't such a dumb move after all.'
____________________________________________________Author's note
Alright part 3 is out! Hope y'all enjoy.
In case anyone had missed it, large portions of Reddit will be going dark in protest of the removal of third party software on June 12th. I had originally planned to join the protest, but then I read the HFY 's official take on the matter (remaining neutral to act as an escape from stressful situations like this) and decided that's worthwhile. As such I will continue posting but otherwise will be off of Reddit in protest.
The first shall be previous and the next shall be in a week or so.