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Is anyone else sick to the back teeth of many ex-Londoners are moving here recently? I appreciate I’m writing this from a place of anger as my neighbours (young family) have recently been forced out of their place by their landlord and have been replaced by a dreadful couple from London. Everywhere you go nowadays you will encounter that snivelling Home Counties accent and experience the massive sense of entitlement synonymous with a life lived in London. Leith is unrecognisable these days, even compared with 7-8 years ago. It used to be the case that London was a Hoover sucking in all the vacuous people who thought they were hot shit and we largely dodged those types but not anymore. Anyway, if you’re reading this and are considering relocating from London to Edinburgh - please don’t! Keep your high rents, housing crisis and stinking attitude to yourselves thank you very much.

If you are interested in Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency contact us at +44 759 388 2116 on Telegram/Whatsapp.
I have Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency.
Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste agency is the latest course by Iman Gadzhi.
Copy Paste Agency is designed for established agency owners, who can use these lessons to scale their business.
In Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency, you will learn:

• How to continue to run a multiple-six-figure agency from home with a skeleton staff and minimal expenses
  
• How to command higher retainers… and retain those clients for longer
  
• How to automate, delegate, and optimize every area of your agency from lead generation and sales to service delivery and client communication
  

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TW: SA.
Do you remember August 2019? I do, it was like yesterday and forever ago all at the same time.
You were suppose to come visit, and we were going to meet for the first time since becoming friends online 10 years prior. I really thought this was the best time and I couldn’t be more excited. That was, until my relationship started to fall apart right before our eyes. I was struggling a lot to work, and with my mental health. I was finally decompressing after leaving such an abusive environment. I had been moved out for 1 year.
Anyways, I started a new job, I started new meds and I was feeling really good, except I still couldn’t afford to pick you up from the airport or find someway too, I planned to use my paycheque but then I was being broken up with.
This was my first real relationship, you know that. I thought I had found my one; and actually to this day I still believe that because we are still together. It turns out we were young and stupid, and took a big situation and made it worse but we needed some time to figure that out. Anyways, that’s not really the story here.
What I want to tell you, is why I couldn’t just accept my breakup, leave him, move back home and somehow make our plans work.
The truth is my step dad was abusing me, not just physically and emotionally but also sexually. This had gone on between the ages of 9 years old and 18 years old. I couldn’t go home and I couldn’t let my relationship end because I had no where to go, and the only person who knew the truth was my then boyfriend (now fiancé).
I couldn’t tell you, because at that point I couldn’t tell anyone. The only reason my fiancé knew is because it came up in person one time, when discussing his own personal experience. I was still trying to process what happened and how it was affecting my relationship, my mental health and honestly my own relationship with myself. All I knew was that if my relationship ends I would have to go back and I couldn’t.
It wasn’t because I was picking a boy who I’d only been with for a year and a half over you. It was because I was just starting to get better, and I could not regress again… I just couldn’t. I know I wouldn’t have made it.
I am deeply sorry that I fucked everything up, and I wish I hadn’t spent so many years lying to everyone about what was really going on.
I did want to tell you too, that in 2021, I told my mom the truth, I told my grandma and I told my sister. I shortly then told my other family and friends. After that, I made the very brave decision to report a historical SA case. In august of 2021, he was arrested. He got out the next day, or the same day I can’t remember but he was given a court order that he had to leave my mothers house. That didn’t happen until October 2021, but we’ve been free since.
This past February, I testified in front of a judge in a preliminary hearing to see if my case would make it to a trial. It did. February of next year, I will testify in court again at a trial.
I have gone to so much therapy, I regulated my medication, I stopped medicating with drugs, alcohol etc. I realize my mistakes, and so much more. I am the best me that I can be and I want you to know that I am better now. I am incredibly sorry for my selfish actions and I will never be able to make up for that, but I hope maybe one day you will understand. I hope you are doing better too btw.
I believe you graduated this year didn’t you? Congratulations! I know you worked really hard, and I bet your dad is so proud up there.
I realize even saying all of this wouldn’t really change anything and that is exactly why I don’t intend to send this to you, and I’m just simply getting it off my chest. But I did want to put it out there, I know you used to be a lurker here so here goes nothing.
C, I will always love and cherish our friendship ; you were truly incredible and got me through some of the most horrific things ai have ever experienced. I wish nothing but good things for you, and maybe just maybe one day we can reconnect, until then take care.
Love always, K Y

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what are some of your physical signs of abuse/neglect?
The one that I struggle with the most is my teeth. My mouth already has a lot of silver fillings and signs of damage from very early childhood (I went through neglect/poverty so I wasn’t taught correctly or monitored to see i was brushing correctly and was not taught to floss) and when I struggle with periods of very bad mental health nowadays from my CSA trauma and bad memories from growing up low income and emotionally neglected, it’s very hard to floss consistently and schedule cleanings so I cause even more permanent damage to my teeth. I get sad when I look at my teeth and think about how much more healthy looking they could have looked if my parents hadn’t overlooked such a simple thing when I so young and if I’d didn’t go though the trauma that contributed to my current mental health issues. It’s a very interconnected issue because my sexual abuse was allowed to happen for years because my parents didn’t pay enough attention to me or and didn’t teach me important life lessons and my brother my abuser was often left in charge of supervising me :(
Another example would be skin picking because of my anxiety that developed from trauma I’m not sure if this counts, but dancing is one of my huge struggles. Sexual abuse during my early developmental years contributed to a ton of body image issues that I struggle with. I always hated dancing and feel so self conscious moving my body to perform or present to others in any way. growing up, my childhood home environment was often deprived of joy, music, dancing,etc and was generally very high stress. i remember in second grade i wrote my favorite song was "fur elise" because it was one of the only songs I knew. Looking back it seems kinda funny picturing a small child saying that their favorite song is classical music but it was actually kind of dark because that time in my life was very deprived of joy, music, dancing and other enrichment, i recall instead lots of trying to quietly entertain myself and distract myself from my parents' yelling. This also affects my romantic and sexual relationships as adult. i have felt very disconnected from my body since childhood and it visibly shows.
I would love to hear what are some of your examples? It’s important to remember that you’re not alone, you’re not broken and we can all achieve our journeys of healing together <3

If you are interested in Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency contact us at +44 759 388 2116 on Telegram/Whatsapp.
I have Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency.
Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste agency is the latest course by Iman Gadzhi.
Copy Paste Agency is designed for established agency owners, who can use these lessons to scale their business.
In Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency, you will learn:

• How to continue to run a multiple-six-figure agency from home with a skeleton staff and minimal expenses
  
• How to command higher retainers… and retain those clients for longer
  
• How to automate, delegate, and optimize every area of your agency from lead generation and sales to service delivery and client communication
  

To get Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency contact us on:
Whatsapp/Telegram: +44 759 388 2116 (Telegram: multistorecourses)
Reddit DM to u/RequestCourseAccess
Email: silverlakestore[@]yandex.com (remove the brackets)

TL.DR. at the end...
Pretty much what the title says. My gf has had anxiety and depression for years. We met last year through a mutual best friend "K" (21f), between August and September, and we hit it off as friends.
A few weeks later, I told K that I might be developing fellings for this girl but wasn't sure yet and would not try anything before being completely positive about it. She then suggested that I gorget about it for a while, since this girl was not in a very stable position, mentally speaking.
We get to february and I finally managed to get out of my ex's claws (she managed to rope me back in for a few months before I finally broke free). It should be noted that before and after the deal with my ex, I was completely sane and ready for a relationship (at least that's what I was told by my therapist).
Back to february and I told K that I liked this girl and was sure of it, we had become good friends and I was certain I felt that way and that she felt the same. K told me to go for it, so I went. I told my GF I liked her, I had liked her for some time and wanted us to date.
At first she was confused because she had had toxic relationships previously and was surrounded by false rumors (by the way I despise those), thinking nobody would have feelings for her. She told me she needed to talk about it. I agreed and waited patiently for her answer. She came back saying she felt something but wasn't sure what it was, but was willing to find out.
We dated for a month and a half and she managed to confirm that she did feel the same for me as I did for her, so I waited a couple kore days and proposed to her, so it became official.
While we were dating, and after we became an official couple, she'd have these anxiety attacks on our nightly facetime. They'd last a month on every single night, then be good for a week, and then back at it for another month. I tried to help her as best as I could by reassuring her, letting her know I was there and anything to try to calm her down.
Overtime, it became more difficult, she would no longer answer me and would start hitting herself on her thighs, getting bruises high enough her leg so that her skirts (she likes to wear them) would hide the marks. I died inside whenever I heard her doing it (she would turn off her camera but not her microphone).
She then told me she wanted me to listen, but because she did it in order to receive attention (she gets the worst end of the deal when it comes to her family and "friends"( they started the rumors based on a case of sexual harassment she suffered during the pandemic by someone we both know)). She did it so much she started doing it out of pure reflex, but I managed to convince her to stop.
She stopped hitting herself for a while when she found out I used to do it in private whenever I experienced my own anxiety attacks in the past and also when I told her it made me feel desperate and useless since I could do nothing to stop her whilst being over the phone.
This got her worse because she blamed herself for everything (this is important since she does it a lot over pretty much anything), but stopped punching herself. The first month of anxiety passed and we had a rather pepaceful week, then it came again.
We had a fre misunderstandings over silly things and she started doing something I always hated but never had the guts to say it since I fear I'll make it worse: she stated that every bad thing that happened to her was not important because she deserved it.
Now I don't know about you, but I am the kind of person who believes that nobody deserves to have bad things happening to them. May them be as small as scratching your arm against rose thorns or as big as mentally or physically suffering any sort of abuse.
She, however, is way down that hole and doesn't seem to get out, she says she'll do the work, but I just keep seeing her get worse and worse. Her family does the opposite of help (she gets treated like the black sheep even though she's done nothing wrong) and her classmates and project classmates pretty much force her to do all the work.
Between that and her job, she can't get a break from all the emotional trouble and breaks down every single time. I can't even have a normal conversation for more than five mintues because she starts berating herself and hurting herself again. She now digs her nails into her skin and pulls her hair (at least that's all I've been able to see, cause she might still punch herself without me knowing).
I have tried everything but she always goes back to thinking she's a failure despite everything she's accomplished.
She stops breathing, she feels like she's choking, she ends up telling me I deserve better and that it'd be easier if she just died, to which I counter with "and what about me?" Which gives me "you can get someone better than me because I am a waste of resources" and I am so tired and desperate of hearing that.
She knows I tried to end it myself last year by almost jumping of a building and falling on a piked fence. I did not go through with it by some miracle because I decided I was NOT going out that way and that whenever the time came, I would leave on my own terms.
She tried to do the same on a pedestrian bridge that overlooked a busy avenue but said she was to much of a coward to go through with it because she suddenly feared death. I told her at the moment that fearing death was everything but coward, and I stand by it.
I have a great deal of respect to people who did not go through with it and even towards people who, sadly, did. It is not easy to get yourself out of taking that last step or moving the arm or fingers and swallow one last time.
Whenever she has these situations she apologizes, stating she says a lot of things she doesn't mean, but I'm not sure anymore and it makes my heart break.
Last week I could not take it anymore, it was finals week and I had been studying as much as I could. I was also needed at home a lot to take care of repairs and stuff, so I had to cancel a few times we would be seeing each other. She confronted me about it, saying she felt disappointed, alone, worthless and a failure.
Then I snapped.
I snapped in a different manner than what you may think. I apologized, and didn't even explain. I apologized profusely about making her feel like that and that if she didn't want to talk to me anymore and end things, then I would understand completely and would not get angry or mad at all.
To be honest, it is kind of difficult for me to go out, even if it's just with friends. My family's economic situation is not great (my father stole from us before he ran away, died and left us with massive debts to cover, along with school debts) and everytime I want to go out, the first answer is always "we have no money, you will not go out".
After I said what I said while my first mental breakdown in months. She got worse. Open mouth, insert foot.
We talked it out, thought we'd progressed, but she's brought it up again a few times during her anxiety attacks.
This leads us to today.
One of her friends (it was NOT K) had an anxiety attack of her own and we went to help her. Said friend passed out in her arms (nobody saw it coming) and we rushed her to the infirmary. My GF had to go take an exam and I walked her to it. While on the way, she started having one herself, as she thought of herself as the worst friend ever because she had to go to the exam.
I tried comforting her as best as I could, but I had to skeddadle back home on the bus route and was running out of time. She had an anxiety attack about the same thing during the exam, told me about it and I couls only sit in the bus feeling miserable and useless.
I got home, she then got picked up by her parents and got home, we started talking and something insignificant on one of her school chats triggered another anxiety attack and she stopped breathing. This went on for a couple of hours. I'd try to stabilize her and not two minutes after she'd get it again.
She finally mamaged to sleep, but I am in dire need of any kind of help. I feel useless, desperate, ignored, fed up, worthless. I feel like I'm not enough because she told me she felt alone in this world and it just broke my heart. But everytime I tell her that I was sorry she felt that way or anything else to try to comfort her, she replies it's not my fault, that she's the one with the problem and that's it. But she keeps falling into the same things and repeats them over and over again for hours.
I don't know what else to do.
For those who read the entire thing, thank you.
TL.DR.: My GF's anxiety attacks have gotten worse and I feel useless and worthless because of it.

She knows about my rules due to my LC. She respects them although is constantly telling me to be less 'extreme' and 'covid cases are down now' and how I could just 'throw myself back in there' as 'nothing is stopping me'.
She thinks it is being extreme when I said I don't want to live in the house and have said I will live in a van on the drive. She reluctantly accepts it.
She will want to see me of course and she keeps saying 'I hope you will come into the house at some point'. I imagine she will always be trying to pressure me however this is only planned to be a stop gap to something where I can be more isolated.
You could say stay far away due to the above but living only out of the van I think it will be important to have a base as a backup once I give up my current flat. The longer term plan is to move out of the city, where I currently am, and find some small bit of land for myself once I get there. She is already in the country.
Having a van though I think will be really useful as I can just drive off any time I want whereas with something like a caravan I would be stuck. The plan is I will live in the van on the driveway just temporarily until we make an arrangement with a local landowner where I could park it and later on get some land for my own after finding something suitable.
So in the meantime, and after, she will be wanting to see me. We will just go on dogwalks and stuff I think. Should I mask too? She will moan about it and it would be nice to get fresh air but safety first and I can still walk on my own without a mask.
Seems like it will be similar or less potential exposure than living in a city apartment block currently and doing outdoor volunteer work a couple of times a week here. Less in terms of living quarters as there are shared hallways and a couple of hundred people living in the building all using just 2 entry points.

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tl;dr: (Ex?) Best friend stops responding or doesn't follow through after saying they'll get back in touch. Is frustrating. How to approach?
Backstory: She and I have known each other for 5-6 years now, and have been/were best friends for 3 of them. We had our first big fight ever a few weeks ago, and it got pretty ugly. Since then, we've had intermittent contact, and usually only about surface level things. Last week we hung out online and had a good time. Then earlier this week we've hung out (again, online) and continued to have a good time.
The problem: She and another friend of ours are currently planning to visit me this weekend (this will be our first in-person hangout since the fight). To coordinate ourselves a group chat was created ~330-4pm today. The other friend was quite active and was asking her about carpooling, leaving/arrival time, etc etc. My (ex?)-best friend said one thing, which was at least positive, but then she went radio silent in the group chat. Meanwhile, she and I were having our own (surface level) convo before she headed out to an event ~5pm (meaning, she wasn't super busy before heading out). Before she left she said "I’ll definitely let you know when I’m headed home 😉." Spoiler alert, haven't heard from her since, even after she came back online.
I'm debating whether to let these things slide/act like I'm not bothered, or talk to her about it. Normally I'm laidback, aren't bothered by the small things, easily forgive, etc etc. But a big value of mine as a person is communication (which she knows), so when she suddenly stops engaging, or says she'll reach out and doesn't, it does bother me (again, which she knows). However, she tends to take any sort of confrontation as an attack against her, so if we do talk about it I'm worried of pushing her away when we have both expressed a desire to remain friends.
Any advice or insight would be appreciated. Thank you.

Hi friends, does anyone know if I need some day laborers for a couple hours of basic yard work, do I just pull up to any Lowe’s/Home depot? Or is it specific stores/days/times people looking for work hangout at? I’ve never done it before. My Spanish is pretty good and I normally do everything myself but I recently hurt my back and it’s absolutely killing me. Don’t want it to affect my day job so looking for some help.
Mainly just sweeping, pulling a few weeds and trimming some low trees. Maybe picking up some dog poop out of the rocks if they will do that lol. Was planning on getting waters and pizza or something for the gang, maybe beers when it’s done.
What’s a fair wage to pay? Not sure how long it’ll take but don’t imagine it’ll take more than 3 hours, my yard is small. I know they are looking for work and want to pay them fairly. Do I need to provide gloves or will they have them? Sorry if these are stupid questions lol.

I’ve been living in Tokyo for almost a year now completing my uni degree, and after graduating will most likely do English teaching or some sort of job that’ll easily get me a new visa. But back in my home country I had quite a bit of experience as a musician, musical stage performer and screen actor which I would love to make use of here in Japan. I’m also fluent in speaking Japanese and often perform Japanese songs at my uni club events.
My Japanese friends are constantly telling me I should do talent work, which I would love to do but I just don’t know where to start. I’d assume there’s some agencies which are more exploitative than others? If anyone has any experience with talent work or knows someone of the sort, I’d love to hear some advice. Thanks!

If you are interested in Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency contact us at +44 759 388 2116 on Telegram/Whatsapp.
I have Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency.
Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste agency is the latest course by Iman Gadzhi.
Copy Paste Agency is designed for established agency owners, who can use these lessons to scale their business.
In Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency, you will learn:

• How to continue to run a multiple-six-figure agency from home with a skeleton staff and minimal expenses
  
• How to command higher retainers… and retain those clients for longer
  
• How to automate, delegate, and optimize every area of your agency from lead generation and sales to service delivery and client communication
  

To get Iman Gadzhi – Copy Paste Agency contact us on:
Whatsapp/Telegram: +44 759 388 2116 (Telegram: multistorecourses)
Reddit DM to u/RequestCourseAccess
Email: silverlakestore[@]yandex.com (remove the brackets)

What am I looking for? Well mostly for someone to speak to on a consistent basis who I gel well and get along with well.
As for myself I am a blunt and honest person so if you ask me something and want a straight answer I'm your guy for giving an honest assessment even if you don't like it. That being said I am kind and caring and will ask about your day and life and anything going on I can help with I will offer.
In terms of my hobbies or interests I am a massive animal lover, this can be confirming by my 9 cats at home! A snake and 2 doggos! All of whom live in perfect harmony and who I never want to turn into tea cosy's for meowing at 4am...
I am also a gamer, I play my pc mostly which is my main source of entertainment however I also have access to my switch and my ps4 in case the mood takes me! Music is also something I love, very into my rock music and a lot of the old west coast rap music right now.
Tattoos! Several pieces of art on my body including a Bowser and a Pokémon tattoos, yes I display my nerdiness proudly!
If you fancy a chat about anything above or anything in general come and say Hi!

Please let me know if I should do anything differently, thanks.
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