Crossword heaven

50_Cent_Bulletproof_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
50_Cent_Bulletproof_EUR_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Ace_Combat_X_Skies_Of_Deception_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Ace_Combat_X_Skies_of_Deception_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Activision_Hits_Remixed_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
Akudaikan_Manyuuki_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Asterix.And.Obelix.XXL.2.EUR.MULTI6.PSP-4FuN.7Z
ATV_Offroad_Fury_Pro_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
BattleZone_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
Capcom.Classics.Collection.Reloaded.EUR.PSP-4FuN.7Z
Capcom_Classics_Collection_Reloaded_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Cars_EUR_FRENCH_PSP-Goomba.7Z
Chotto_Shot_Edit_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Crash_Tag_Team_Racing_EUR_FRENCH_PSP-Goomba.7Z
Dave_Mirra_BMX_Challenge_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
Death_Jr_II_Root_Of_Evil_USA_PSP-ARTiSAN.7Z
Dungeon_Siege_Throne_Of_Agony_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
Dynasty_Warriors_Vol_2_EUR_GERMAN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Dynasty_Warriors_Vol_2_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
EA_Replay_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Eragon_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Eragon_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Every_Extend_Extra_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
FIFA_07_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
FILES.TXT
Football_Manager_2007_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Gitaroo_Man_Lives_USA_PSP-DMU.7Z
Godfather_EUR_Multi3_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Grand_Theft_Auto_Vice_City_Stories_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Gun.Showdown.EUR.PSP-4FuN.7Z
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Jeanne_Darc_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
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Kameleon.EUR.PSP-4FuN.7Z
Kazook_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Killzone_Liberation_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
LEGO_Star_Wars_II_The_Original_Trilogy_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Lumines.II.USA.PSP-SUSHi.7Z
Lumines_II_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Luxor_The_Wrath_Of_Set_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Makai_Senki_Disgaea_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Marvel_Ultimate_Alliance_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Mortal_Kombat_Unchained_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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NASCAR_07_EUR_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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Platypus_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Riviera_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
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Sega_Genesis_Collection_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Snoopy_Vs_The_Red_Baron_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Sonic_Rivals_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Sonic_Rivals_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Thrillville_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Vulcanus_Seek_And_Destroy_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Warhammer_Battle_For_Atluma_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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X-Men_Legends_II_El_Ascenso_de_Apocalipsis_EUR_SPANISH_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Xiaolin_Showdown_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Yu-Gi-Oh_GX_Tag_Force_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Battlezone_EUR_MULTI5_PROPER_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
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Bliss_Island_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Blitz_Overtime_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Bomberman.EUR.PSP-PGS.7Z
Brothers.in.Arms.D.Day.USA.PSP-SUSHi.7Z
Brothers_In_Arms_D-Day_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Bubble_Bobble_Evolution_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Capcom_Puzzle_World_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Comic_Party_Portable_JPN_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Daisenryaku_Portable_2_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
DJ_Max_Portable_International_Version_KOR_INTERNAL_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Dokodemo_Issyo_Lets_Gakkou_Obenkyou_Pack_iNTERNAL_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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Dynasty_Warriors_Vol_2_EUR_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Every_Extend_Extra_PSP_Pal_Multi5-CHRONIC.7Z
Family_Guy_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
FIFA_07_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
FILES.TXT
Ford_Street_Racing_LA_Duel_EUR_MULTi5_PSP-C3RB3RUS.7Z
Formula_One_2006_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Ghost_Rider_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Gunpey_Reverse_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Gurumin_A_Monstrous_Adventure_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Il_Signore_Degli_Anelli_Tactics_EUR_PROPER_READNFO_PSP_C3RB3RUS.7Z
Intelligent_License_2_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
I_GRIFFIN_ITALIAN_PSP-DvB.7Z
Justice_League_Heroes_EUR_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Ju_and_Ryu_Toeic_LC_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
Kanji_Trainer_Portable_JPN_WORKING_REPACK_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
LA_Rush_EUR_MULTi5_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Legend_of_Heroes_III_Song_of_the_Ocean_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Mach_Modified_Air_Combat_Heroes_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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Maplus_Portable_Navi_GPS_Receiver_Doukonban_JPN_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Maplus_Portable_Navi_JPN_iNTERNAL_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Marvel_Ultimate_Alliance_EUR_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
Medal_Of_Honor_Heroes_EUR_ITA_PSP-C3RB3RUS.7Z
Medal_Of_Honor_Heroes_EUR_SPANISH_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Medal_of_Honor_Heroes_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Metal_Gear_Solid_Portable_Ops_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Metal_Slug_Anthology_EUR_PROPER_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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MTX_Mototrax_EUR_PROPER_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Myst_EUR_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Nanpure_and_Oekaki_Puzzle_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
NBA_Live_07_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Need_for_Speed_Carbon_EUR_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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NFL_Street_3_EUR_PROPER_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
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P-Kara_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
PaRappa_The_Rapper_JPN_PSP-LOVE.7Z
Parodius_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Professor_Sudoku_EUR_MULTi3_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Pro_Evolution_Soccer_2007_REPACK_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Reel_Fishing_EUR_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
Rengoku_II_The_Stairway_to_HEAVEN_EUR_MULTI5_READNFO_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
Rocky.Balboa.EUR.PSP-NextLevel.7Z
Routes_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Routes_Portable_Kinou_Genteiban_JPN_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Salamander_Portable_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Samurai_Warriors_State_Of_War_EUR_FRENCH_PSP-Goomba.7Z
Scooby_Doo_Whos_Watching_Who_EUR_READNFO_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Sega.Mega.Drive.Collection.EUR.PSP-NextLevel.7Z
Shinobido.Tales.of.the.Ninja.EUR.PSP-NextLevel.7Z
Shinobido_Homura_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
Shrek_Smash_N_Crash_USA_PSP-Start2.7Z
Sid_Meiers_Pirates_Live_The_Life_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
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Talkman_Shiki_Shabe_Lingual_Eikaiwa_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
Tenchi_no_Mon_2_Busouden_KOR_PSP-LOVE.7Z
The.Sims.2.Pets.EUR.PSP-NextLevel.7Z
The.Warriors.EUR.PSP-NextLevel.7Z
The_Sims_2_Pet_Wan_Nyan_Life_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
The_Warriors_USA_PSP-2CH.7Z
Thrillville_EUR_MULTI5_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
TOCA_Race_Driver_2_Ultimate_Racing_Simulator_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Tomb_Raider_Legend_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
Tony_Hawks_Underground_2_Remix_EUR_FRENCH_PSP-Goomba.7Z
Twinbee_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
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Wizardry_III_Haou_no_Keifu_JPN_PSP-BAHAMUT.7Z
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300_March_To_Glory_EUR_MULTI5_PSP-DARKFORCE.7Z
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Aces_of_War_EUR_PSP-CONFLiCT.7Z
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Boku_ha_Koukuu_Kanseikan_Airport_Hero_Shinchitose_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
Bomberman_Land_Portable_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
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FILES.TXT
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Rezel_Cross_CHT_PSP-WRG.7Z
Rocky_Balboa_USA_PSP-pSyPSP.7Z
Sangokushi_VIII_JPN_PSP-Caravan.7Z
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A one-shot. Vote, comment, all the things.
What if the Galaxy was still on Windows 95?
Human Games
The galactic database was boring, deliberately so. Endless dry statistics, endless animations and walkthroughs. By the time he had left his first clutch, he was ready to leave all the basics to AI and concentrate on getting better at asking the right questions. Today was different as he waited to add an entirely new database.
The Human Contingency had refused to share their files for what they claimed to be ‘hardware, software and security incompatibility’. They had tried to demand that everyone else change, that millions of worlds should convert to their standards. They had conjured up imaginary monsters and fantastical disasters. Strange creatures known as ‘Worms’ or worse, ‘Hackers’ would arise from the dark and wreck, steal or burn all data. The galactic community had laughed at them but the humans had doubled down and rendered all traffic one-way under severe criminal and trade sanctions. Then they built beautiful and free stations that simply absorbed galactic data for their population and burned every line of code trying to leave. Today would be the test.
After nearly half a lifetime in discussion, the humans had proposed a test, a demonstration that they were telling no lies, that data could and would be weaponised against the reluctant community. They volunteered to fund a control, a nexus of the two systems. They refused to build it, stating that all data would become invalid if touched by human hands, they refused to even discover the location only insisting that it was on the main networks and that it had firewalls that could be physically destroyed the moment the experiment exceeded its parameters. The human government refused to comment on the expected duration of the experiment but their bookies and gambling houses were only bickering about which fraction of a second it would take.
He was now sitting in the most important chair the tech world had ever seen. He would turn on the networks, the finest emulator that his entire profession could develop. They had cloned and anonymised data from thousands of worlds and run them seamlessly together. One look at the data and you would be convinced you were looking at a major planet, the hub of a quadrants trade and science. A second look would have you wondering if the universe that we all lived in sat on some bureaucrat's desk in some unknown dimension.
“The human government has announced it is standing down all official network systems. They are leaving the networks open to their general population but all state and military networks have gone offline. Were they supposed to do that?”
He shrugged, “No. I mean, we didn’t ask them to. Perhaps they are afraid we will find out things they don’t want to share. The human database has only dropped by a couple of points, not even within our margin of error. The Nexus is a go.” He looked up at his Directors and the sole human appointed to observe the results. It was the human that leaned forward, “Please activate your recording. The attacks have already begun and I require the data.”
A quick glance at the screens showed nothing, “The Nexus is not open yet. Attack is impossible.”
The human grunted and swore softly, “My blessed friend, now that they know where it is they will have found out who built it and persuaded them to surrender or just stolen their credentials. They are already in. You just haven’t seen them yet. It's our worst-case scenario and forty years of us telling you differently hasn’t changed a damn thing. Earth says to open the Nexus when ready.”
A light on his dashboard turned green. With little ceremony, he began cutting through the authorisations required until finally he was faced with a question:
Do you wish to proceed?
He prayed to the rubber duck of his profession and said yes. The network flashed on the screens as the two data systems met and translated each other, as half-cooked algorithms met half-baked hardware. It was clear which side was winning when the green of Earth systems adapted and overcame all resistance and the Nexus began spitting out thousands of terabytes of data in all directions.
He fumbled with the protocols to close the firewalls but his system refused to acknowledge him. The doors had been prised off and the Galaxy lay helpless as the human data stream poured from the Nexus.
“All systems rebooting”
“Admin control removed”
“Admin now ‘HFY/WarnedYou’
“Nexus is now designated as Pornhub Central/Brave New Worlds
New Directories are available: PaNcaKes Nd fUrries foR U
The human seemed amused and shook his head as he entered a code into his Comms. Deep in the server farm that supported the experiment an EMP field ripped out and crushed the machines. Nexus died in the blink of an eye.
Everything in the command centre also died a sudden death until the local systems were repaired and linked up. Nexus was gone.
“Ehh…don’t know if this is helpful but all official human sites are back up and running. Data bleed is minimal. Looks like whatever the fuck just happened is contained and over.”
“Hello? Are you still there?”
----------------
The human seemed relaxed as the disgruntled Xenos of the community were obliged to attend what it called a ‘Post-Mortem’. The translation didn’t add to the joy of the event. One of the Directors attacked first, “You lied! You knew where our system was and planted a damn bomb in it! The experiment is invalid!”
The human poured himself more coffee and looked around, “There was no bomb. Some of our more enterprising idiots met one of the more gullible of your contractors. They ‘stole’ the designs for a server farm from us and sold them to you. It included an EMP bomb that relied on…” He checked his notes, “nineteen different systems all running on full power at the same time. That would never happen in testing so we knew it was for today. We took control of it and locked out anyone else.”
The Xenos were all shouting together at that point so he held up his hand, “Please, the ones that sold the design to you also came to us and we paid them a not inconsiderable sum and then employed them. We quarantined the information and deemed it an accurate reflection of the test.” He looked around, “The purpose of which was if you will take a moment to recall, to see if your systems were as secure as you thought. That it could withstand a simple connection to our dataspace.”
He opened a new screen, “Let us watch what actually happened.
That is the phishing attacks before the Nexus opened. You missed most of them because it never occurred to you to monitor the traffic. We did.”
As soon as the official human sites had left the gateway unguarded a flood of data had begun spilling out in all directions.
The location was discovered and a pipeline formed. The inert Nexus was surrounded by code, some malicious and some just curious.
The human paused the display, “This is where they raided your contractors and staff. That obviously worked since then this happened…” He resumed the playback.
The Nexus activated and was immediately swamped by credentialed downloads that sank the pathetic security and took control of the firewalls. Other programs began grabbing all the data they could and sending it home. Huge data swaps peaked and then burst-transmit to new targets. Then it crashed.
The human pointed at the sudden stop. “That's when I blew your servers, it was far too late to solve anything with software. A hard burn was required and I personally would never even risk reusing one of those servers again. On Earth, if this had happened, we would drag them outside and physically destroy every single component. If it was necessary we would strip our workforce to their socks and jocks and give them hammers to do it. This is such a case.”
---------------
It was a much more sombre meeting ten days later when the full damage had been accessed.
The human remained unchanged but the Xenos looked older and if possible more unhappy. “Some of our governments have declared this an act of war. We prefer to believe that you acted in good faith, something I dearly hope to be true. I must add that you are effectively speaking as a Witness for the Defence right now. There are those that invested heavily in our success and are now reaping the rewards of failure.”
The human stood and gave the meeting a swift bow, “I will start, then, at the beginning. Our space exploration has always been controlled by our central powers. They may have been awkward, conniving and at odds but they were not malicious. When our early fleet met you and discovered your entirely open network we were amazed, delighted even. We thought you a collection of idealists, free with your data, and glad to share.
Imagine our surprise when we found out you thought it was hidden! That it was encrypted even. My God, our children's toys are more seriously protected. We locked your systems down hard on our side, we imposed horrific penalties on anyone that dared to connect to them. Our people thought we were hiding monsters and we couldn’t explain that we were protecting innocents. If we explained how basic your systems were then you would have been destroyed. We allowed them to believe you were monsters instead.”
He took a sip of his water, “Then we tried to warn you. We showed you our systems, and we proved it time and time again but you wouldn’t listen. Not until we suggested we fund the great boondoggle that was Nexus. A feeding frenzy of stuck-up Xeno tech charlatans selling you your own belief in the strength of your systems. You never even asked where all your good, ethical and capable people went when they saw the wind change. We hired them.”
He pulled up the screen grabs of the event, “Within 4.8 seconds you had lost any control of the Nexus. Even as you turned it on it was working for us. I’m guessing you have still no idea how it happened because the gutless wonders that you employed to build it are busy blaming each other. We will furnish you with a full technical analysis. A real one.”
He nodded and moved to sit but was interrupted by the stung chairman, “So this is where your governments went? Why your militaries all went dark? To coordinate this attack?”
The human raised his eyes to heaven and turned back to the Committee, “You truly don’t understand. This was a big deal for your peoples because you failed but we had, and have, told our people nothing. They thought our funding for the Nexus was a water reclamation project on Mars. We shut down all our servers so that we didn’t accidentally respond to the attacks and kill them off. What happened to you is what happens every day to every system on my homeword. You didn’t even make the news cycle. This was not coordinated, this is just… the shit that happens when you open up your system to our public.”
The Committee seemed to mumble to itself before arriving at a conclusion:
“We will await your analysis before judgement.”
The Chairman seemed to hesitate for a moment but he added, “Please, I now believe every word you have spoken to be true but the loss of the Nexus…if not your governments or military then who? Who attacked us?”
The human turned off his microphone and grimaced, “No one and everyone. Gamers seeking out new networks, Influencers seeking a new gimmick. Bored tech staff. Teenagers with a god complex. This is all a game to them. Hide and seek. Crosswords, sudoku, chess and poker all rolled into one. Human games.”
He seemed depressed for a moment, “Don’t worry, our firewalls are back up. Some malware might have made it off the Nexus but we are training your people since you didn’t. Goodnight.”
My Patreon, if anyone wants to support my writing and you can drop into my channel on Discord or buy me a coffee. Also Human Altered on Royal Road

Section One: Assets and Debt
Retirement Balance (and how you got there): $175,000 for myself - I contribute 11% to my 401K and have been contributing steadily at different rates for the past 8 or so years. My husband has $128,000 in his and similar history.
Equity if you're a homeowner (and how much you put down and how you accumulated that payment): Our home is worth ~600K, we put down 5% when we purchased it for $415K about 7 years ago. We refinanced in 2020 and no longer have PMI. We owe 345K - so equity is $255K. We got our down payment from selling our first home. The down payment for that home came from money we received as wedding gifts, we put down 3.5% as first time homebuyers.
Savings account balance: $18,500 - rebuilding this after some projects. We also both had major salary increases in the past 6 months. Our income has increased about 50%. My larger bonus will go in here completely and should bring it to at least $30K.
Checking account balance: $1,960
Credit card debt (and how you accumulated it): None, we use it and pay it off monthly.
Student loan debt (for what degree): None. I paid my student loans from undergrad off about 5 years ago and the company I worked for at the time paid for my Masters. My husband paid his student loans off about 10 years ago and his company also paid for his Masters.
529s: We have a whopping $1,600 saved for our two kids right now but we are working on it.
Section Two: Income
Income Progression: My current salary is $143,000 with anticipated about $35,000 in bonuses this year. I've been working in my field for 13 years, my starting salary was $43,000. I recently took a new job that came with about a 28% salary increase (base salary, not including bonus). This is my third job change since starting in my field and each switch came with a decent salary increase. This is definitely the largest though.
Main Job Monthly Take Home: I think it will be $12,238 (new job, still figuring it out) - my salary is $143K, my husband's is $135K. I contribute 11% to retirement, and have a few small deductions taken out of my paycheck - additional life insurance mainly which is $15/month. My monthly take home looks like it will be $6,566 and my husband’s is $5,672. He contributes 10% to retirement, and pays for vision, dental, health, health FSA and child care FSA (max out both FSAs). We also withhold additional federal taxes each pay period.
Bonuses
This year I will receive a sign on bonus, a performance bonus and my husband will also receive a bonus - all totaling around $45K before tax. Next year we will be back to just my performance bonus. Bonuses are earmarked for savings + home projects.
Section Three: Expenses
Mortgage including taxes & insurance: $2,156
Savings contribution: Currently have $1,250 planned for that - we’re in the process of evaluating budget and tracking everything for the next two months to get a baseline.
Investment contribution: $200 to kids 529s (401Ks noted above)
Debt payments: Car payment is $380 for one car. The other is paid off. We also have $49 monthly payment for furniture that is 0% interest
Car insurance: $176
Donations: $300, this is an area we are currently trying to decide if monthly recurring or a large annual payment will make more sense. I know this seems low for our income and we are working on it as we adjust to the new income.
Utilities: Averages around $350 in the winter
Watesewecompost: $70 (not all on a monthly payment schedule but this is monthly average)
Internet/Streaming Services/Cell Phones: $270 - My in-laws and brother-in-law are on our plans too but they reimburse us so this is just our portion.
Subscriptions: $56 - Patreon, Sirius, Spotify, I may have Netflix in here instead of above for some reason.
Gym membership: $79 for a family membership
Pet expenses: Nothing monthly, our dog doesn’t go to daycare and no dog walker. We just have annual vet expenses typically and dog food falls under groceries.
Childcare: $2400 for full-time daycare and 3 days a week of aftercare - I have a 7 year old and 2 year old.
Life insurance: $44 for my term life insurance
We don’t currently have house cleaners but I do have $300-350/month budgeted for biweekly cleaning in the future. I’m searching for new cleaners.
Note: we have a dog. I won’t mention her a ton. But she is let out whenever she wants to play in our fenced yard. We don’t walk her because she is dog reactive and she gets plenty of exercise in the yard. She’s not ignored, I promise.
I can be super wordy but I’ll try to not drag on. Sorry! I also am super self conscious about how much we ended up spending this week.
Day 1 - Friday
5:45am Get up before 🌅 (thanks kids). We get the kids ready for daycare and school. I wash my face and put on Vit C, hyaluronic acid and moisturizer. My husband (E) takes one child and I take the other for morning drop off. After I get home from drop off, I eat a quick breakfast - fig bar and fill up my water before going down to my office. Around 11am, we get a new appliance delivered and tip the delivery people $20. I had to borrow cash from my 7 year old’s piggy bank and make a note to return it. E stopped at Whole Foods and got beer, vitamins, a soda for me, and body wash for the kids - $51. He also got gas - $41.70.
12pm: Go for a quick run. Shower. Eat a cheese quesadilla and drink a Poppi Ginger Lime soda before starting work again.
3pm: Work. Get older kid (A) from the bus stop. Straighten up the kitchen and work while she plays with neighbors. E goes to get little one (J) from daycare.
6pm: Somehow our garbage disposal is clogged. Cool. Deal with that with my husband and make dinner for two hangry kiddos. E runs to Lowes to grab some tools to try on the clog - $27.58. Get kids down by 8pm and watch reality TV with E. Head up do evening skincare (retinol, moisturizer - I try to skin cycle so retinol every 4th day) and read for a bit.
Food + Drink: $51
Home + Health: $47.58
Transport: $41.70
Total: $140.28
Day 2 - Saturday
6am: Had to spend part of last night in A’s room when she woke up in the middle of the night. My body is sore. Both kids are up by 6:15am. Our garbage disposal appears to be fixed.
7am: E goes to get coffee + donuts (Sat am routine) - $10. Then he takes J to the grocery store. I clean up the kitchen while A hangs out. Groceries are $127.50. I budget about 2K/month for groceries + family eating out right now.
9am: I go for a run when they get back, shower, and then we pack up for a night away.
12:30pm Head out, drop the dog with family for the night and continue to our destination.
2pm: Check in to the hotel and head to the pool/indoor water park for the afternoon. We paid for the hotel with credit card points and the water park is included.
5pm: After a bit we head out to dinner, I have fish tacos and some really good lemonade. E has a burger, kids have hot dog + chicken fingers. We all split fries - $60.94 with 20% tip. It was a window order place not sit down service.
Go to Whole Foods for a few essentials (milk, yogurt, chocolate etc …) before going back to the hotel $27.10
7pm: Back at the hotel we go to the arcade for A to play some games before settling in for bed $20
Food + Drink $225.54
Fun / Entertainment: $20
Day 3 - Sunday
7am: My kids sleep in, which is good because the toddler was up last night and ended up bed sharing with us last night.
E runs out for breakfast - bagels + coffee $24.13
8:30am: We hit up the arcade $20 and then the water park for a little bit before checking out. Leave tip for housekeeping $10
11am: We have a gift card for a smoothie place nearby that we have been meaning to use for 3 years so we get 3 smoothies and after the gc, it’s $6. Head home and pick up the dog on the way.
1:30pm: When we get home, A goes out to play with a friend in the neighborhood and E takes J to Wegmans to get a few things that they didn’t have at the store he went to yesterday $30.11. While they’re gone, I start the laundry and straighten up.
3:30pm: We take both kids to the park, J manages to wipe out on the stairs of the structure and cut below his lip so we head home. Luckily it seems pretty minor and we don’t need to take him to be seen. I do some meal prep for the week and make nachos for our Super Bowl dinner while E hangs out with the kids. A works on her Valentine’s Day cards for her class.
6pm: Dinner, cleanup and 8pm bedtime for kids. E and I alternate nights with the kids for bedtime so I have A and he has J tonight. E and I watch the halftime show, then I head to bed. I read for a bit but am asleep by 10pm.
Food + Drink $60.24
Fun / Entertainment: $20
Other: $10
Day 4 - Monday
6:20am: Wake up with J, do Wordle and the NYT mini crossword while he has milk and I have coffee. I make J’s lunch and pack his snacks. When A gets up and comes down, I give her breakfast. Wash my face, morning skincare and change. E gets J changed and then I drop him at daycare. Come home, eat my breakfast (Siggi’s whole milk yogurt with blueberries, almonds and natural peanut butter) while E gets A ready for school and packs her lunch.
8am: They head to the bus stop. I straighten up, put a load of towels in, clean up my office a little and get to work.
11:30am: quick workout, put my hair color in and eat lunch while it sets. Shower and back to work. I place an order with Thrive Market after going back and forth about it. I ordered new laundry detergent like 3 weeks ago and it shipped last week and hasn’t shown up yet, and tracking is a mess. So we need laundry detergent and I just get our usual monthly stuff a week early - dog food, Olive Oil, face wash, Unreal Dark Chocolate Coconut bars, Annie’s cheddar bunnies and the laundry detergent is $100.08. E got a haircut during lunch - $63.00. He also got the printable Valentine’s Day cards we got for A’s class laminated - $12. And then he went to Costco (he has comp time he’s using today) - got almond butter bars, popcorn, yogurt, yogurt smoothies, and other things I can’t remember $136.15
3:30pm: Get A from the bus. She has a snack and then plays outside with the neighbors. I keep working.
4:15pm E gets J. And now we start the grind of cleaning up, making dinner, eating dinner (pasta, meatballs and broccoli) etc … I take a few min and do a short science excitement with A when she comes in. We eat dinner, E does the dishes and we all watch 30 min of a movie afterwards. Then it’s playtime until bedtime at 8pm.
8pm E and I watch Jack Ryan. Wash my face, brush my teeth, moisturize and then finish Carrie Soto is Back around 10:30 and go to sleep.
Food + Drink: $207.95
Home + Health: $91.28 (split out from the Thrive order - face wash and laundry detergent)
Other $12
Total: $311.23
Day 5 - Tuesday
6am - Same morning as always. After the kids are at daycare/school, I go for a run before starting work.
Work all morning. My laundry detergent I was stressing about yesterday arrives. So I ordered from Thrive unnecessarily, oh well.
12pm - Go pick up salads for lunch - wait forever despite ordering ahead of time. $36.27 - way overpriced.
Back to work and meetings. E cleans the house because he’s off today.
4:30pm - done. E picked up the kids from daycare and aftercare during my last meeting.
5:30pm - We are ordering pizza tonight as it’s a fundraiser for A’s school - $17.58. So yes, I am eating out twice today. Oops. Do the dishes. Take a cat nap on the couch cuddling with A while E bathes J.
8pm - both kids in bed. One episode of Jack Ryan. Bedtime.
Food + Drink: $53.85
Total: 53.85
Day 6 - Wednesday
7am - last night was super rough, J is teething and was up from 1:30-3am, then he went back down after ibuprofen and some milk and we all slept until 7.
8am - E dropped J on his way to work and I got A on the bus, which was a struggle today. Time to work. I eat 2 Heavenly Hunks dark chocolate oatmeal bites, finish my coffee finally and add some LMNT to my water. My hips are killing from sharing the bed with a 2 year old for some of the night.
12pm - I have a psych appointment for a med adjustment - telehealth is so nice. Then I eat lunch before going back to work.
4:30pm - We pickup the kids. Come home, unpack bags, clean up, playtime.
5:30pm - take A to an activity and hang out for an hour with some of the other moms.
6:45pm - home, dinner - leftovers, bedtime routines.
8:30pm I go to bed early because I’m not feeling 100% (not Covid, and I masked earlier while I was at A’s activity)
Total: $0
Day 7 - Thursday
6am - I didn’t sleep great because I have a super sore throat. No other symptoms but damn it hurts. E is off to work early today so I have both kids. Let them watch TV while I pack lunches and make breakfast and then A and I drop J off at daycare. Come home, get A on the bus.
8:15am - time to work.
12pm - short run, lift, quick lunch and back to work. E goes to the grocery store to get fish for dinner tonight $15.22
4:30pm pickup the kids. Drop off some supplies for a school project at another parents house. We all play outside for a bit before starting dinner.
6pm: Dinner time - salmon + green beans followed by play, clean up and bedtime routines.
8pm: After I get A in bed, I watch a little TV with E and then take a bath and go to bed.
Food + Drink: $15.22
Total: $15.22
At the end of each day please tally up your daily expenses. Then at the end of your diary please tally up all expenses in the following categories:
Food + Drink: $613.80
Fun / Entertainment: $40.00
Home + Health $138.86
Clothes + Beauty $0
Transport $41.70
Other $22
Total $856.36
Lastly, reflect on your diary! This was a somewhat higher spending week for us, since we took the kids on an overnight trip. We usually get takeout once a week but this week we went out to eat, and got takeout twice. The grocery spending is pretty normal too. I do feel like I did a lot of convenience buying (i.e. ordering from Thrive for laundry detergent … but then again we needed it and the tracking on the other shipment was not helpful). I’m trying to track all of our purchases and see where we are with the new budget. I am worried about lifestyle creep constantly. I also know we need more in emergency savings, and we have had more but spent it on some house projects. I feel like we make a lot of money but somehow are just not thriving yet when it comes to savings. I struggle to balance spending + saving.

First of all, to avoid any possible misunderstanding, we should state that this was, strictly speaking, a sally to no-where. In fact, Trurl never left his house throughout it— except for a few trips to the hospital and an unimportant excursion to some asteroid. Yet in a deeper and/or higher sense this was one of the farthest sallies ever undertaken by the famed constructor, for it very nearly took him beyond the realm of possibility.
Trurl had once had the misfortune to build an enormous calculating machine that was capable of only one operation, namely the addition of two and two, and that it did incor-rectly. As is related earlier in this volume, the machine also proved to be extremely stubborn, and the quarrel that en-sued between it and its creator almost cost the latter his life. From that time on Klapaucius teased Trurl unmerci-fully, making comments at every opportunity, until Trurl decided to silence him once and for all by building a ma-chine that could write poetry. First Trurl collected eight hundred and twenty tons of books on cybernetics and twelve thousand tons of the finest poetry, then sat down to read it all. Whenever he felt he just couldn't take another chart or equation, he would switch over to verse, and vice versa. After a while it became clear to him that the con-struction of the machine itself was child's play in compari-son with the writing of the program. The program found in the head of an average poet, after all, was written by the poet's civilization, and that civilization was in turn pro-grammed by the civilization that preceded it, and so on to the very Dawn of Time, when those bits of information that concerned the poet-to-be were still swirling about in the primordial chaos of the cosmic deep. Hence in order to program a poetry machine, one would first have to repeat the entire Universe from the beginning—or at least a good piece of it.
Anyone else in Trurl's place would have given up then and there, but our intrepid constructor was nothing daunted. He built a machine and fashioned a digital model of the Void, an Electrostatic Spirit to move upon the face of the electrolytic waters, and he introduced the parameter of light, a protogalactic cloud or two, and by degrees worked his way up to the first ice age—Trurl could move at this rate because his machine was able, in one five-billionth of a second, to simulate one hundred septillion events at forty octillion different locations simultaneously. And if anyone questions these figures, let him work it out for himself.
Next Trurl began to model Civilization, the striking of fires with flints and the tanning of hides, and he provided for dinosaurs and floods, bipedality and taillessness, then made the paleopaleface (Albuminidis sapienria), which be-gat the paleface, which begat the gadget, and so it went, from eon to millennium, in the endless hum of electrical currents and eddies. Often the machine turned out to be too small for the computer simulation of a new epoch, and Trurl would have to tack on an auxiliary unit—until he ended up, at last, with a veritable metropolis of tubes and terminals, circuits and shunts, all so tangled and involved that the devil himself couldn't have made head or tail of it. But Trurl managed somehow, he only had to go back twice —once, almost to the beginning, when he discovered that Abel had murdered Cain and not Cain Abel (the result, apparently, of a defective fuse), and once, only three hun-dred million years back to the middle of the Mesozoic, when after going from fish to amphibian to reptile to mam-mal, something odd took place among the primates and instead of great apes he came out with gray drapes. A fly, it seems, had gotten into the machine and shorted out the polyphase step-down directional widget. Otherwise every-thing went like a dream. Antiquity and the Middle Ages were recreated, then the period of revolutions and reforms —which gave the machine a few nasty jolts—and then civilization progressed in such leaps and bounds that Trurl had to hose down the coils and cores repeatedly to keep them from overheating.
Towards the end of the twentieth century the machine began to tremble, first sideways, then lengthwise-—for no apparent reason. This alarmed Trurl; he brought out cement and grappling irons just in case. But fortunately these weren't needed; instead of jumping its moorings, the ma-chine settled down and soon had left the twentieth century far behind. Civilizations came and went thereafter in fifty-thousand-year intervals: these were the fully intelligent be-ings from whom Trurl himself stemmed. Spool upon spool of computerized history was filled and ejected into storage bins; soon there were so many spools, that even if you stood at the top of the machine with high-power binoculars, you wouldn't see the end of them. And all to construct some versifier! But then, such is the way of scientific fanaticism. At last the programs were ready; all that remained was to pick out the most applicable—else the electropoet's educa-tion would take several million years at the very least.
During the next two weeks Trurl fed general instructions into his future electropoet, then set up all the necessary logic circuits, emotive elements, semantic centers. He was about to invite Klapaucius to attend a trial run, but thought better of it and started the machine himself. It immediately proceeded to deliver a lecture on the grinding of crystallo-graphical surfaces as an introduction to the study of sub-molecular magnetic anomalies. Trurl bypassed half the logic circuits and made the emotive more electromotive; the ma-chine sobbed, went into hysterics, then finally said, blub-bering terribly, what a cruel, cruel world this was. Trurl in-tensified the semantic fields and attached a strength of char-acter component; the machine informed him that from now on he would carry out its every wish and to begin with add six floors to the nine it already had, so it could better medi-tate upon the meaning of existence. Trurl installed a philo-sophical throttle instead; the machine fell silent and sulked. Only after endless pleading and cajoling was he able to get it to recite something: "I had a little froggy." That appeared to exhaust its repertoire. Trurl adjusted, modulated, expostulated, disconnected, ran checks, reconnected, reset, did everything he could think of, and the machine presented him with a poem that made him thank heaven Klapaucius wasn't there to laugh—imagine, simulating the whole Uni-verse from scratch, not to mention Civilization in every particular, and to end up with such dreadful doggerel! Trurl put in six cliche filters, but they snapped like matches; he had to make them out of pure corundum steel. This seemed to work, so he jacked the semanticity up all the way, plugged in an alternating rhyme generator—which nearly ruined everything, since the machine resolved to become a missionary among destitute tribes on far-flung planets. But at the very last minute, just as he was ready to give up and take a hammer to it, Trurl was struck by an inspiration; tossing out all the logic circuits, he replaced them with self-regulating egocentripetal narcissistors. The machine simpered a little, whimpered a little, laughed bitterly, complained of an awful pain on its third floor, said that in general it was fed up, through, life was beautiful but men were such beasts and how sorry they'd all be when it was dead and gone. Then it asked for pen and paper. Trurl sighed with relief, switched it off and went to bed. The next morn-ing he went to see Klapaucius. Klapaucius, hearing that he was invited to attend the debut of Trurl's electronic bard, dropped everything and followed—so eager was he to be an eyewitness to his friend's humiliation.

Trurl let the machine warm up first, kept the power low, ran up the metal stairs several times to take readings (the machine was like the engine of a giant steamer, galleried, with rows of rivets, dials and valves on every tier)—till finally, satisfied all the decimal places were where they ought to be, he said yes, it was ready now, and why not start with something simple. Later, of course, when the machine had gotten the feel of it, Klapaucius could ask it to produce poetry on absolutely whatever topic he liked.
Now the potentiometers indicated the machine's lyrical capacitance was charged to maximum, and Trurl, so nervous his hands were shaking, threw the master switch. A voice, slightly husky but remarkably vibrant and bewitching, said:

"Phlogisticosh. Rhomothriglyph. Floof."

"Is that it?" inquired Klapaucius after a pause, extremely polite. Trurl only bit his lip, gave the machine a few kicks of current, and tried again. This time the voice came through much more clearly; it was a thrilling baritone, sol-emn yet intriguingly sensual:

Pev't o' tay merlong gumin gots,
Untie yun furly pazzen ye,
Confre an' ayzor, ayzor ots,
Bither de furloss bochre blee!

"Am I missing something?" said Klapaucius, calmly watching a panic-stricken Trurl struggling at the controls.
Finally Trurl waved his arms in despair, dashed clattering several flights up the metal stairs, got down on all fours and crawled into the machine through a trapdoor; he ham-mered away inside, swearing like a maniac, tightened some-thing, pried at something, crawled out again and ran franti-cally to another tier. At long last he let out a cry of triumph, threw a burnt tube over his shoulder—it bounced off the railing and fell to the floor, shattering at the feet of Klapau-cius. But Trurl didn't bother to apologize; he quickly put in a new tube, wiped his hands on a chammy cloth and hollered down for Klapaucius to try it now. The following words rang out:

Mockles! Fent on silpen tree,
Blockards three a-feening,
Mockles, what silps came to thee
In thy pantry dreaming?

"Well, that's an improvement!" shouted Trurl, not en-tirely convinced. "The last line particularly, did you notice?"
"If this is all you have to show me…" said Klapaucius, the very soul of politeness.
""Damn!" said Trurl and again disappeared inside the ma-chine. There was a fierce banging and clanging, the sputter-ing of shorted wires and the muttering of an even shorter temper, then Trurl stuck his head out of a trapdoor on the third story and yelled, "Now try it!"
Klaupaucius complied. The electronic bard shuddered from stem to stern and began:

Oft, in that wickless chalet all begorn,
Where whilom soughed the mossy sappertort
And you were wont to bong—

Trurl yanked out a few cables in a fury, something rattled and wheezed, the machine fell silent. Klapaucius laughed so hard he had to sit on the floor. Then suddenly, as Trurl was rushing back and forth, there was a crackle, a clack, and the machine with perfect poise said:

The Petty and the Small;
Are overcome with gall ;
When Genius, having faltered, fails to fall.
Klapaucius too, I ween,
Will turn the deepest green
To hear such flawless verse from Trurl's machine.

"There you are, an epigram! And wonderfully apropos!" laughed Trurl, racing down the metal stairs and flinging himself delightedly into his colleague's arms. Klapaucius, quite taken aback, was no longer laughing.
"What, that?" he said. "That's nothing. Besides, you had it all set up beforehand."
"Setup?!"
"Oh, it's quite obvious… the ill-disguised hostility, the poverty of thought, the crudeness of execution."
"All right, then ask it something else! Whatever you like! Go on! What are you waiting for? Afraid?!"
"Just a minute," said Klapaucius, annoyed. He was try-ing to think of a request as difficult as possible, aware that any argument on the quality of the verse the machine might be able to produce would be hard if not impossible to settle either way. Suddenly he brightened and said:
"Have it compose a poem—a poem about a haircut! But lofty, noble, tragic, timeless, full of love, treachery, retribu-tion, quiet heroism in the face of certain doom! Six lines, cleverly rhymed, and every word beginning with the letter s!!"
"And why not throw in a full exposition of the general theory of nonlinear automata while you're at it?" growled Trurl. "You can't give it such idiotic—"
But he didn't finish. A melodious voice filled the hall with the following:

Seduced, shaggy Samson snored.
She scissored short. Sorely shorn,
Soon shackled slave, Samson sighed,
Silently scheming,
Sightlessly seeking
Some savage, spectacular suicide.

"Well, what do you say to that?" asked Trurl, his arms folded proudly. But Klapaucius was already shouting:
"Now all in g! A sonnet, trochaic hexameter, about an old cyclotron who kept sixteen artificial mistresses, blue and radioactive, had four wings, three purple pavilions, two lacquered chests, each containing exactly one thousand medallions bearing the likeness of Czar Murdicog the Head-less…"
"Grinding gleeful gears, Gerontogyron grabbed / Giggling gynecobalt-6o golems," began the machine, but Trurl leaped to the console, shut off the power and turned, defending the machine with his body.
"Enough!" he said, hoarse with indignation. "How dare you waste a great talent on such drivel? Either give it decent poems to write or I call the whole thing off!"
"What, those aren't decent poems?" protested Klapaucius.
"Certainly not! I didn't build a machine to solve ridicu-lous crossword puzzles! That's hack work, not Great Art! Just give it a topic, any topic, as difficult as you like…"
Klapaucius thought, and thought some more. Finally he nodded and said:
"Very well. Let's have a love poem, lyrical, pastoral, and expressed in the language of pure mathematics. Tensor alge-bra mainly, with a little topology and higher calculus, if need be. But with feeling, you understand, and in the cyber-netic spirit."
"Love and tensor algebra? Have you taken leave of your senses?" Trurl began, but stopped, for his electronic bard was already declaiming:

Come, let us hasten to a higher plane,
Where dyads tread the fairy fields of Venn,
Their indices bedecked from one to n,
Commingled in an endless Markov chain!

Come, every frustum longs to be a cone,
And every vector dreams of matrices.
Hark to the gentle gradient of the breeze:
It whispers of a more ergodic zone.

In Riemann, Hilbert or in Banach space
Let superscripts and subscripts go their ways
Our asymptotes no longer out of phase,
We shall encounter, counting, face to face.

I'll grant thee random access to my heart,
Thou'lt tell me all the constants of thy love;
And so we two shall all love's lemmas prove,
And in our bound partition never part.

For what did Cauchy know, or Christoffel,
Or Fourier, or any Boole or Euler,
Wielding their compasses, their pens and rulers,
Of thy supernal sinusoidal spell?

Cancel me not—for what then shall remain?
Abscissas, some mantissas, modules, modes,
A root or two, a torus and a node:
The inverse of my verse, a null domain.

Ellipse of bliss, converge, O lips divine!
The product of our scalars is defined!
Cyberiad draws nigh, and the skew mind
Cuts capers like a happy haversine

I see the eigenvalue in thine eye,
I hear the tender tensor in thy sigh.
Bernoulli would have been content to die,
Had he but known such a² cos 2 Ø!

This concluded the poetic competition, since Klapaucius suddenly had to leave, saying he would return shortly with more topics for the machine; but he never did, afraid that in so doing, he might give Trurl more cause to boast. Trurl of course let it be known that Klapaucius had fled in order to hide his envy and chagrin. Klapaucius meanwhile spread the word that Trurl had more than one screw loose on the subject of that so-called mechanical versifier.
Not much time went by before news of Trurl's computer laureate reached the genuine—-that is, the ordinary—poets. Deeply offended, they resolved to ignore the machine's existence. A few, however, were curious enough to visit Trurl's electronic bard in secret. It received them courte-ously, in a hall piled high with closely written paper (for it worked day and night without pause). Now these poets were all avant-garde, and Trurl's machine wrote only in the traditional manner; Trurl, no connoisseur of poetry, had relied heavily on the classics in setting up its program. The machine's guests jeered and left in triumph. The machine was self-programming, however, and in addition had a special ambition-amplifying mechanism with glory-seeking circuits, and very soon a great change took place. Its poems became difficult, ambiguous, so intricate and charged with meaning that they were totally incomprehensible. When the next group of poets came to mock and laugh, the machine replied with an improvisation that was so modern, it took their breath away, and the second poem seriously weakened a certain sonneteer who had two State awards to his name, not to mention a statue in the city park. After that, no poet could resist the fatal urge to cross lyrical swords with Trurl's electronic bard. They came from far and wide, carrying trunks and suitcases full of manuscripts. The machine would let each challenger recite, instantly grasp the algo-rithm of his verse, and use it to compose an answer in exactly the same style, only two hundred and twenty to three hundred and forty-seven times better.
The machine quickly grew so adept at this, that it could cut down a first-class rhapsodist with no more than one or two quatrains. But the worst of it was, all the third-rate poets emerged unscathed; being third-rate, they didn't know good poetry from bad and consequently had no inkling of their crushing defeat. One of them, true, broke his leg when, on the way out, he tripped over an epic poem the machine had just completed, a prodigious work beginning with the words:

Arms, and machines I sing, that, forc'd by fate,
And haughty Homo's unrelenting hate,
Expell'd and exil'd, left the Terran shore …

The true poets, on the other hand, were decimated by Trurl's electronic bard, though it never laid a finger on them. First an aged elegiast, then two modernists committed sui-cide, leaping off a cliff that unfortunately happened to lie hard by the road leading from Trurl's place to the nearest train station.
There were many poet protests staged, demonstrations, demands that the machine be served an injunction to cease and desist. But no one else appeared to care. In fact, maga-zine editors generally approved: Trurl's electronic bard, writing under several thousand different pseudonyms at once, had a poem for every occasion, to fit whatever length might be required, and of such high quality that the magazine would be torn from hand to hand by eager readers. On the street one could see enraptured faces, bemused smiles, some-times even hear a quiet sob. Everyone knew the poems of Trurl's electronic bard, the air rang with its delightful rhymes. Not infrequently, those citizens of a greater sensi-tivity, struck by a particularly marvelous metaphor or as-sonance, would actually fall into a faint. But this colossus of inspiration was prepared even for that eventuality; it would immediately supply the necessary number of restorative rondelets.
Trurl himself had no little trouble in connection with his invention. The classicists, generally elderly, were fairly harm-less; they confined themselves to throwing stones through his windows and smearing the sides of his house with an unmentionable substance. But it was much worse with the younger poets. One, for example, as powerful in body as his verse was in imagery, beat Trurl to a pulp. And while the constructor lay in the hospital, events marched on. Not a day passed without a suicide or a funeral; picket lines formed around the hospital; one could hear gunfire in the distance —instead of manuscripts in their suitcases, more and more poets were bringing rifles to defeat Trurl's electronic bard. But the bullets merely bounced off its calm exterior. After his return from the hospital, Trurl, weak and desperate, finally decided one night to dismantle the homeostatic Homer he had created.
But when he approached the machine, limping slightly, it noticed the pliers in his hand and the grim glitter in his eye, and delivered such an eloquent, impassioned plea for mercy, that the constructor burst into tears, threw down his tools and hurried back to his room, wading through new works of genius, an ocean of paper that filled the hall chest-high from end to end and rustled incessantly.
The following month Trurl received a bill for the elec-tricity consumed by the machine and almost fell off his chair. If only he could have consulted his old friend Klapaucius! But Klapaucius was nowhere to be found. So Trurl had to come up with something by himself. One dark night he unplugged the machine, took it apart, loaded it onto a ship, flew to a certain small asteroid, and there assembled it again, giving it an atomic pile for its source of creative energy.
Then he sneaked home. But that wasn't the end of it. The electronic bard, deprived now of the possibility of hav-ing its masterpieces published, began to broadcast them on all wave lengths, which soon sent the passengers and crews of passing rockets into states of stanzaic stupefaction, and those more delicate souls were seized with severe attacks of esthetic ecstasy besides. Having determined the cause of this disturbance, the Cosmic Fleet Command issued Trurl an official request for the immediate termination of his device, which was seriously impairing the health and well-being of all travelers.
At that point Trurl went into hiding, so they dropped a team of technicians on the asteroid to gag the machine's output unit. It overwhelmed them with a few ballads, how-ever, and the mission had to be abandoned. Deaf techni-cians were sent next, but the machine employed panto-mime. After that, there began to be talk of an eventual puni-tive expedition, of bombing the electropoet into submission. But just then some ruler from a neighboring star system came, bought the machine and hauled it off, asteroid and all, to his kingdom.
Now Trurl could appear in public again and breathe easy. True, lately there had been supernovae exploding on the southern horizon, the like of which no one had ever seen before, and there were rumors that this had something to do with poetry. According to one report, that same ruler, moved by some strange whim, had ordered his astroengineers to connect the electronic bard to a constellation of white supergiants, thereby transforming each line of verse into a stupendous solar prominence; thus the Greatest Poet in the Universe was able to transmit its thermonuclear crea-tions to all the illimitable reaches of space at once. But even if there were any truth to this, it was all too far away to bother Trurl, who vowed by everything that was ever held sacred never, never again to make a cybernetic model of the Muse.

a: Recipe Card Backstory
Today is national pumpkin pie day, and because no one in their right mind would start a time-wise turf war with Christmas, the very notion of this being left on the doorstep of the major commercial holiday feels like some nod to the true spirit of national pumpkin pie day, which is a will to mean nothing at all. Imagine the best pumpkin pie you ever ate – ever – and then, in your mind, exaggerate how good it tasted, and now tell me what that really means against a lifetime of gratification and accomplishment. I mean, I love pumpkin pie – I make it, eat it, pass it around. But as food goes, it is a vegetable matrix set inside a pastry. See, in truth, pumpkin pie is a peasant food – pick a squash of virtually any quality, steam it, sweeten it, then place it in a crust. Voila – a dish you can make even when there’s very little else on the menu. At the local food pantry, a common type of donation from local grocery stores are these eye-catching pies and cakes that imply celebrations – sheet cakes with rosettes, black forest tortes, pies of every type and size – but everything is also at least a few days past its best-by date, so just try to figure out how those details informing the meal are meant to greet the consumer. Late to the party? After the gold rush? All of the food is free – what the grocery stores send over instead of tossing it away – and I pick through it on behalf of local residents, some with mobility issues, other in emergency housing, who can’t be there themselves. Some of the pies are 16 inches across, and I try to imagine the potlucks they were almost put in service to, the office parties barely missed. You could feed a room with a couple of those pies alone, and I briefly fantasize about the pies conspiring to bring about just such celebration, if only by virtue of being purchased. You cut a modest arc from the vast circumference, and just as the first bite commences, out of nowhere, great aunts and former business partners and future senators begin milling about the living room, partaking of pumpkin pie, gesturing with forks, little saucers held level in their hands. Indeed, every conversation goes better with pumpkin pie, to such a degree that one wonders finally whether we really need a national holiday to make the case. Squash – there is an international business syndicate dedicated to the promotion of squash, probably more than one, and some number of its members, or allies of same, must have proposed the idea of a national holiday, had a bit of pie to think it over, then decided it should be celebrated on Christmas. My sense is that they knew they’d sewn up Thanksgiving, so why not sail up the coast through the winter holidays, unload a few crates of squash and get busy in the kitchen. Pumpkin pie is so modest in its ambition, one wonders which business holiday wouldn’t mind sharing the celebratory occasion with it. Labor Day is also national pumpkin pie day – see how little that surprised you? Not true, but notice how plausible it seemed. Place national pumpkin pie day on the Fourth of July, and no one would bat an eye. Some days at the foodbank, I feel a primal urge to test the metaphorical mobility by flinging one of those 16-inch behemoths across the warehouse area, not expecting the aerodynamics to impress but just to characterize the animation of the moment w/t our relationship to pumpkin pie. Wasting food produces feelings of shame in me, so the urge goes unenacted, even as I picture the centripetal force sending beads of pumpkin pie in all directions, a redistribution of wealth in a way, rendered in the artful manner of a drip painting. Would it work? Would a renewed faith in justice as a global concern spring forth from some colossal pie suddenly airborne and all aflutter? Pies and cakes of all sizes are generally too much of a hassle for the volunteer delivery drivers, who already have a half dozen hefty bags of groceries to carry to each doorstep, so as I always do, I walk past those day-old pumpkin pies. Still, I know they are there, side by side on a darkened shelf, in a warehouse currently closed for the day but geometry at the ready, the hum of life-support systems in the air.
b: Greeting Card Text
Merry Christmas. The problem with capitalism – as if the pathological accumulation of capital were not itself something of a dead giveaway vis-à-vis the nature of human problems we can’t seem to shake – is more than inequality. The inequality we know about, can work around. But when a big pile of cash grows altitudinous, then a quirky characteristic of naturalism kicks in, and the capital begins to do a little accumulating of its own. Capital principally collects capitalists, and if the fuzziness of that transaction somewhat obscures the view, keep in mind capital’s state of transcendence is chiefly characterized as fluid, implying that all by itself, sufficient capital might suddenly splash from its ledge, rush outward, fall in love with a hydroelectric dam that’s a bit choosy about its fluids, and soon capital insists on taking a cut of all profits derived from electricity, which in fact it does. Markets! Markets! Come get your markets! But one day it won’t – a day, we can imagine, when the gush of electricity that greets us of a morn will be like the dawn itself and everlasting, and oh capital, are you ready for that? Bathing ourselves in electricity? Electricity squishing between our toes on the way to start the coffee? A spritz of electricity before we tackle the times crossword? Someday that will be the story, and therefrom we will gaze out across the horizon of human malady and achievement, and we will see capital accumulating capitalists, and we will speak wise about the days of yore when capital formed the stuffing on which to lay one’s head – to sleep, perchance to dream, and woe to the ones who manage to take it with them, the it being capital. The true capitalists in the afterlife are like bricklayers without brick – the walls they erect are for them alone. Oh to keep out heaven! Merciful love, my winnings are my own! Emaculations abounding, your solicitations are barred at the door! And for a time, such a torment presides, but then the domicile thus afflicted reaches its own limit, bids adieu to said commitment, and the dead capitalists thus exposed at last relinquish whatever dirt lingered under the nails, between the toes, and thereby does the real estate market perforce contract. Then capital returns to take its cut, and the body’s cells are solemnly divided up, a handy ruler or metric scale now and then used to resolve disputes. But, yes, the capitalist arrives in paradise with the rest of us, it’s true – Merry Christmas, wherever you are – but after the scales find their balance, the pile of residue that once constituted a free-living human is, in time, blown through the gates of heaven, scattered about the grass. Does it harm the grass? The residents of paradise toss the question around, elect to give the matter of chance the benefit of the doubt, see which way Walt’s beard points in the morning. Electricity be that-a-way! we’ll holler to each other as we cheerfully pass, on our way to everlasting life over some luscious bloom of grass. Merry Christmas! By which I mean, have a pleasant winter holiday, and if you believe Jesus the Christ was born on this day, then by all means celebrate that – the fractal of divinity unwinds where it will, and all the snowflakes begin to cheer for geometers past and present. Hoorah! The geometers of ancient worlds, the ones who designed pyramidal piles with such exactitude as to survive the harsh journey through outer space in one piece – all those heavers of levers and lovers of form made vehicles sufficiently suited to the passing of time as to transition the pharoanic cargo to its divine destination. Not just here and now but everywhere and all the time – what I’m promising, says that boy king to the assembled constellations, regarding our future relationship with remembrance. Behind him are gifts to sweeten the deal, such exquisite treasure as only the finest artists and metalworkers might produce when asked to please the universe with something made of the earth. And so the universe accepts the capital, gives us snow along the hillsides at sunrise, and infinity accumulates, like a flattering light, about the fine hairs of the hands and face.

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• Goldfish
  
• shittyaquariums
  
• PlantedTank
  
• fishtank
  
• Koi
  
• nanotank
  
• corydoras
  
• Cichlid
  

Fitness

• Fitness
  
• FitAndNatural
  
• xxfitness
  
• FitnessGirls
  
• bodybuilding
  
• bodyweightfitness
  
• homegym
  
• fitness30plus
  
• FitnessGuides
  
• fatlogic
  
• PetiteFitness
  
• gymsnark
  
• FitnessMaterialHeaven
  
• loseit
  
• nattyorjuice
  
• fitness40plus
  
• stopdrinkingfitness
  
• crossfit
  
• veganfitness
  
• fitnessonline
  
• fitpregnancy
  
• FitnessOver50
  
• vrfit
  
• fitness50plus
  
• Fitnessguideshare
  

Flag Football

• flagfootball

Flower Arranging & Collecting

• FlowerArranging
  
• flowers
  
• FloralDesign
  
• Cutflowers
  
• Floristry
  
• houseplants
  

Flower growing
Fly tying

• flytying

Flying disc
Flying model planes

• modelplanes

Footbag

• footbag

Foosball

• foosball

Foraging

• foraging
  
• foraginguk
  

Fossicking

• fossicking

Fossil hunting

• FossilHunting
  
• FossilPorn
  
• fossilid
  
• Paleontology
  
• fossils
  

Freestyle football

• FreestyleFootball

Frisbee

• Frisbee
  
• ultimate
  

Fruit picking

• fruit
  
• FruitTree
  

Furniture building

• woodworking
  
• BeginnerWoodWorking
  
• Carpentry
  
• palletfurniture
  

Gaming

• gaming
  
• pcgaming
  
• Gaming4Gamers
  
• GirlGamers
  
• gamingsetups
  
• truegaming
  
• gamingsuggestions
  
• GamingDetails
  
• retrogaming
  
• gamingnews
  
• gamingpc
  
• GamingLaptops
  
• Gamecollecting
  
• gamingmarket
  
• linux_gaming
  

Gardening

• gardening
  
• vegetablegardening
  
• GuerrillaGardening
  
• SquareFootGardening
  
• UrbanGardening
  
• GardenWild
  
• IndoorGarden
  
• homestead
  
• GardeningAustralia
  
• OrganicGardening
  
• AustinGardening
  
• GardeningUK
  
• whatsthisplant
  
• houseplants
  
• containergardening
  
• garden
  
• HawaiiGardening
  
• indoorgardening
  
• NativePlantGardening
  
• GardeningPNW
  
• GardeningWhenItCounts
  
• GardeningInventions
  

Genealogy

• Genealogy
  
• Ancestry
  
• GeneticGenealogyNews
  
• 23andme
  
• AncestryDNA
  

Geocaching

• geocaching
  
• geocache
  

Geology

• geology
  
• geologyporn (Safe For Work)
  
• geologycareers
  
• Geologymemes
  
• whatsthisrock
  
• rockhounds
  
• GeologySchool
  

Ghost hunting

• GhostHunting
  
• Ghosts
  
• Paranormal
  
• Ghoststories
  

Gingerbread house making

• GingerbreadHouses

Glassblowing

• glassblowing
  
• lampwork
  

Go

• gogame

Gold prospecting

• Prospecting
  
• Gold
  

Golfing

• golf
  
• GolfSwing
  
• golfclassifieds
  
• ProGolf
  

Gongfu tea

• GongFuTea

Gongoozling

• Gongoozling

Graffiti

• Graffiti
  
• blackbookgraffiti
  
• graffhelp
  
• GraffitiTagging
  
• GraffitiStickers
  

Groundhopping

• groundhopping

Gunsmithing

• gunsmithing
  
• DIYGuns
  

Gymnastics

• Gymnastics
  
• CollegeGymnastics
  
• WomensGymnastics
  
• GymnasticsWorld
  

Hacking

• hacking
  
• HowToHack
  
• cybersecurity
  
• masterhacker
  
• Hacking_Tricks
  
• HackingTechniques
  
• learnhacking
  
• hardwarehacking
  
• ethicalhacking
  

Handball

• Handball

Herbalism

• herbalism
  
• Herblore
  

Herping
Hiking
Horse Racing

• Horses
  
• horseracing
  

Tunneling
Home Improvement

• HomeImprovement
  
• homeimprovementideas
  
• Home
  
• homeautomation
  
• hometheater
  
• homeowners
  

Homebrewing

• Homebrewing
  
• HBL
  
• TheBrewery
  
• brewing
  

Horseback Riding

• Horses
  
• horsebackriding
  

Horseshoes

• Horseshoes

Hula Hooping

• Hooping

Hunting

• Hunting
  
• bowhunting
  
• Huntingdogs
  
• elkhunting
  
• coyotehunting
  
• CanadaHunting
  
• Duckhunting
  
• Waterfowl
  
• Californiahunting
  
• TexasHunting
  
• HuntingAlberta
  
• HuntingAustralia
  
• HuntingGearChat
  
• HuntingRecipes
  
• GhostHunting
  
• TreasureHunting
  
• Arrowheads
  

Hurling

• /hurling

Hydro Dipping

• HydroDip

Hydroponics

• Hydroponics
  
• hydro
  
• SemiHydro
  

Ice Hockey

• hockeyplayers
  
• hockey
  
• nhl
  
• collegehockey
  
• hockeyjerseys
  
• hockeygoalies
  

Iceboating

• iceboating

Inline Skating

• inlineskating
  
• Inline_Cafe
  
• AggressiveInline
  
• inline
  
• BladerNews
  

Insect collecting

• Entomology
  
• InsectCollections
  
• whatsthisb
  
• Insectcollecting
  

Instruments

• Instruments
  
• NativeInstruments
  
• Luthier
  
• UnusualInstruments
  
• InstrumentPorn
  
• guitar
  
• piano
  
• drums
  
• bass
  
• /violin
  
• trumpet
  
• saxophone
  
• trombone
  
• ukelele
  
• harmonica
  
• uke
  
• fiddle
  
• orchestra
  
• brass
  
• woodwinds
  
• percussion
  
• bagpipes
  
• banjo
  
• accordion
  
• mandolin
  
• harmonium
  
• sitar
  
• didgeridoo
  
• bouzouki
  

Inventing

• invention

Jewelry making

• jewelrymaking
  
• jewelry
  
• jewelers
  
• jewelrylove
  
• resin
  

Jigsaw puzzles

• Jigsawpuzzles

Jogging

• jogging
  
• slowjogging
  
• C25K
  
• running
  

Journaling

• Journaling
  
• JournalingIsArt
  
• ArtJournaling
  
• notebooks
  

Judo

• judo
  
• SurpriseJudo
  

Juggling

• juggling

Jujitsu

• jiujitsu
  
• Ju_Jutsu
  

Jukskei
Jumping rope

• jumprope

Kabaddi

• Kabaddi
  
• prokabaddi
  

Karaoke

• karaoke
  
• singing
  

Kart racing

• gokarts
  
• Karting
  

Kayaking

• Kayaking
  
• kayakfishing
  

Kendama

• Kendama

Kendo

• Kendo

Kite flying

• kites

Kitesurfing

• kitesurfing
  
• Kiteboarding
  

Knife collecting

• knives
  
• Knife_Swap
  
• knifeclub
  
• chefknives
  

Knife making

• knifemaking
  *Bladesmith
  

Knife throwing

• ThrowingKnife

Knitting

• knitting
  
• casualknitting
  
• KnitHacker
  
• knittinghelp
  
• YarnAddicts
  
• GeeKnitting
  
• yarnporn (Safe For Work)
  
• MachineKnitting
  
• LoomKnitting
  
• Yarnswap
  
• Kitting
  
• Drunkknitting
  
• nailbinding
  
• tatting
  
• BobbinLace
  

Knot tying

• knots
  
• macrame
  

Kombucha brewing

• Kombucha
  
• findascoby
  

LARPing

• LARP

Lace making
Lacrosse

• lacrosse
  
• StickDoctor
  
• NCAAMensLax
  
• BoxLacrosse
  
• PLL
  
• lacrossecoach
  
• Womens_lacrosse
  

Lapidary

• Lapidary

Laser Tag
Leather Crafting

• Leathercraft
  
• Leatherworking
  
• LeatherClassifieds
  
• LeatherTutorials
  
• Leatherworkers
  

Lego Building

• lego
  
• legodeal
  
• Legomarket
  
• legostarwars
  
• legotechnic
  
• legos
  
• legomodular
  
• Legodimensions
  
• LEGOtrains
  
• LegoTechniques
  
• legoleaks
  

Letterboxing

• Letterboxing

Linguistics

• linguistics
  
• asklinguistics
  
• badlinguistics
  
• linguisticshumor
  
• languagelearning
  

Lock picking

• lockpicking
  
• Locksmith
  

Lomography

• lomography

Longboarding

• longboarding
  
• longboardingDISTANCE
  
• LongboardBuilding
  

Machining

• Machinists
  
• machining
  
• manufacturing
  
• MachinistPorn (Safe For Work)
  
• MachinePorn (Safe For Work)
  
• engineering
  
• EngineeringPorn (Safe For Work)
  
• AskEngineers
  

Macrame

• macrame

Magic

• Magic
  
• magick
  
• occult
  

Magnet Fishing

• magnetfishing

Mahjong

• Mahjong

Makeup

• Makeup
  
• MakeupEducation
  
• Makeup101
  
• MakeupRehab
  
• MakeupLounge
  
• UnconventionalMakeup
  
• makeuptips
  
• makeupflatlays
  
• MakeupAddiction
  
• MakeupAddicts
  
• beauty
  
• BeautyGuruChatter
  
• RandomActsofMakeup
  
• makeupfreebies
  
• makeupdupes
  
• MakeupForMen
  
• makeupartists
  
• makeuporganization
  
• Makeup_Reviews
  
• MakeupNews
  

Manga/Manwha

• manga
  
• mangaswap
  
• MangaCollectors
  
• MangaFrames
  
• manganews
  
• MangaArt
  
• mangadeals
  
• Mangamakers
  
• mangacoloring
  
• MangaMemes
  
• manhwa
  
• Manhua
  

Marbles

• Marbles
  
• marblerun
  

Marching band

• marchingband
  
• CMB
  
• Bandmemes
  
• drumcorps
  
• band
  

Martial Arts

• martialarts
  
• MMA
  
• MuayThai
  
• kravmaga
  
• aikido
  
• MilitaryMartialArts
  
• taekwondo
  
• wma
  
• karate
  
• kungfu
  
• judo
  
• bjj
  
• StreetMartialArts
  
• TheMcDojoLife
  
• kungfucinema
  

Massaging

• massage
  
• MassageTherapists
  
• MassageGuns
  
• reflexology
  

Mathematics

• learnmath
  
• mathematics
  
• math
  
• matheducation
  
• mathmemes
  
• hPhilosophyofMath
  
• badmathematics
  

Mazes

• mazes
  
• puzzles
  

Mechanics

• mechanics
  
• MechanicAdvice
  
• AskMechanics
  

Medical science

• medical
  
• medicine
  
• medical_advice
  
• medlabprofessionals
  
• medicalschoolanki
  
• medicalschool
  
• premed
  
• MedicalPhysics
  
• MedicalHelp
  
• MedicalMeme
  

Meditation

• Meditation
  
• MeditationPractice
  
• audiomeditation
  
• meditationscience
  
• transcendental
  
• TheMindIlluminated
  
• streamentry
  

Memory training

• memorypalace
  
• memory
  

Metal detecting

• metaldetecting
  
• BottleDigging
  

Metalworking

• metalworking
  
• Welding
  
• Blacksmith
  
• blacksmithing
  

Meteorology

• meteorology
  
• weather
  
• climate
  

Microbiology

• microbiology

Microscopy

• microscopy
  
• electronmicroscopy
  
• MicroNatureIsMetal
  
• MicroPorn (Safe For Work)
  
• underthemicroscope
  

Mineral collecting

• Minerals
  
• rockhounds
  
• Radioactive_Rocks
  
• mineralcollectors
  
• whatsthisrock
  
• MineralPorn
  

Mini Golf
Miniature art

• minipainting
  
• Miniworlds
  
• miniatures
  
• PrintedMinis
  
• miniaturesculpting
  
• minipainting
  

Minimalism

• minimalism
  
• simpleliving
  
• extrememinimalism
  
• digitalminimalism
  
• declutter
  
• minimalism_jerk
  
• ZeroWaste
  
• minimalist
  
• Anticonsumption
  
• Minimalismporn
  

Model United Nations

• MUN
  
• ModelUSGov
  
• modelSupCourt
  
• ModelNZParliament
  
• AustraliaSim
  
• CMHOC
  
• ModelUSPress
  

Model Building

• Model
  
• modelmakers
  
• ModelCars
  
• modeltrains
  
• Gunpla
  
• 3Dmodeling
  
• modelengineering
  
• ModelShips
  
• modelrailroads
  
• modelplanes
  
• modelexchange
  
• modelrockets
  
• modelrocketry
  
• modeltanks
  
• 3Dprinting
  
• modelaircraft
  

Modeling

• Model
  
• MODELING
  
• CosplayandModeling
  

Motorsports

• motorsports

Motorcycling

• motorcycles
  
• motorcycle
  
• MotoUK
  
• bikesgonewild
  
• motocamping
  
• SuggestAMotorcycle
  
• motorcyclesroadtrip
  
• Ducati
  
• vintagemotorcycles
  
• RideitJapan
  
• adventuremotorcycling
  
• AdventureBike
  
• MotoIRELAND
  

Mountain biking

• MTB
  
• Bikeporn
  
• bicycling
  
• xbiking
  

Mountaineering

• Mountaineering
  
• alpinism
  
• climbing
  

Movie memorabilia collecting
Museum visiting

• museum
  
• MuseumPros
  
• MuseumPorn
  

Music

• Music
  
• LetsTalkMusic
  
• musicsuggestions
  
• WeAreTheMusicMakers
  
• MusicPromotion
  
• musicproduction
  
• indieheads
  
• MusicInTheMaking
  
• MusicFeedback
  
• musictheory
  
• MusicBattlestations
  
• MusicRecommendations
  
• musicians
  
• musicmarketing
  
• composer
  
• musicology
  
• MusicMatch
  
• MusicForConcentration
  
• musicals
  
• edmproduction
  
• MusicIndia
  
• MusicaEnEspanol
  
• MusicEd
  
• MusicForRPG
  
• MusicNews
  
• musicindustry
  
• musicbusiness
  
• MusicProductionDeals
  
• musichoarder
  
• musicfestivals
  
• MusicalTheatre
  
• musicalcomedy
  
• musicalscripts
  
• musiccognition
  
• musicmakers
  
• musicprogramming
  
• musiceducation
  
• Musicandmathematics
  

Mycology

• mycology
  
• MushroomGrowers
  
• unclebens
  
• Mushrooms
  
• shroomers
  
• shrooms
  
• sporetraders
  
• MycoBazaar
  
• MycoBuySellTrade
  
• PsilocybinMushrooms
  
• MycologyandGenetics
  
• shroomery
  
• SporeTradersIndia
  
• mushroom_hunting
  

Nail art

• NailArt
  
• Nails
  
• Nailpolish
  
• malepolish
  
• lacqueristas
  
• redditpolish
  
• nail_art
  
• DipPowderNails
  

Needlepoint

• Needlepoint

Netball

• netball

Neuroscience

• neuroscience
  
• neuro
  
• Neuropsychology
  

Noodling
Nordic skating

• nordicskating

Orienteering

• orienteering

Origami

• origami
  
• papercraft
  

Outdoors

• Outdoors
  
• Outdoor
  
• outdoorgear
  

Paintball

• paintball

Painting

• painting
  
• acrylicpainting
  
• oilpainting
  
• learnart
  
• Art
  
• WhatIsThisPainting
  
• minipainting
  
• AbstractArt
  
• PaintingTutorials
  
• DigitalPainting
  
• Watercolor
  
• PourPainting
  

Paragliding

• paragliding
  
• freeflight
  
• paramotor
  

Parkour

• Parkour
  
• Goatparkour
  
• ParkourTeachers
  

Pen Spinning

• penspinning
  
• penspin
  

People-watching

• MeetPeople

Performance

• Performance
  
• PerformanceArt
  

Perfume

• fragrance
  
• Perfumes
  
• PerfumeExchange
  
• fragranceclones
  

Pet sitting

• petsitting

Philately

• philately
  
• stamps
  

Phillumeny

• Phillumeny

Philosophy

• philosophy
  
• askphilosophy
  
• PhilosophyMemes
  
• AcademicPhilosophy
  

Photography

• photography
  
• AmateurPhotography
  
• streetphotography
  
• photocritique
  
• itookapicture
  
• AskPhotography
  
• Beginning_Photography
  
• filmphotography
  
• ExposurePorn
  
• PhotographyProTips
  
• PhotographyTutorials
  
• wildlifephotography
  
• postprocessing
  
• Casual_Photography
  
• Photography_Gear
  
• PhotographyJobs
  
• analog
  
• LandscapePhotography
  
• Cameras
  
• WeddingPhotography
  
• foodphotography
  
• ToyPhotography
  

Physics

• Physics
  
• AskPhysics
  
• PhysicsStudents
  
• physicsmemes
  
• QuantumPhysics
  
• GamePhysics
  
• MedicalPhysics
  
• apphysics
  
• CartoonPhysics
  
• PhysicsHelp
  
• TheoreticalPhysics
  

Pickleball

• Pickleball

Picnicking
Pilates

• pilates
  
• Posture
  
• ClubPilates
  

Pin

• Pins
  
• EnamelPins
  

Plastic art

• plastic

Playing musical instruments

• Instruments
  
• NativeInstruments
  
• UnusualInstruments
  
• InstrumentPorn
  

Podcasting

• podcast
  
• podcasts
  
• podcasting
  
• PodcastClassifieds
  
• PodcastGuestExchange
  

Poetry

• Poetry
  
• OCPoetry
  
• ShittyPoetry
  
• poetry_critics
  
• poetryreading
  
• PoetrySlam
  

Poi

• poi/

Poker

• poker
  
• Poker_Theory
  
• onlinepoker
  
• PokerVids
  

Pole dancing

• poledancing
  
• poledance
  

Polo

• polo
  
• waterpolo
  

Pools

• pools
  
• swimmingpools
  

Postcrossing

• postcrossing

Pottery

• Pottery
  
• Ceramics
  
• potteryporn
  

Powerboat racing

• powerboats

Powerlifting

• powerlifting
  
• powerbuilding
  
• Iron
  
• bodybuilding
  
• weightlifting
  
• strength_training
  
• weightroom
  
• Weakpots
  

Practical Jokes

• Jokes

Pressed flower craft

• flowerpressing

Proofreading and editing

• editing

Proverbs

• Proverbs
  
• biblereading
  

Psychology

• psychology
  
• askpsychology
  
• psychologystudents
  
• PsychologyTalk
  
• AcademicPsychology
  
• ClinicalPsychology
  
• IOPsychology
  
• psychologymemes
  
• psychologyresearch
  
• schoolpsychology
  
• positivepsychology
  

Public speaking

• PublicSpeaking

Puppetry

• puppetry
  
• puppets
  

Puzzles

• puzzles
  
• Jigsawpuzzles
  
• LogicPuzzles
  
• mechanicalpuzzles
  

Pyrography

• Pyrography

Qigong

• qigong
  
• TrueQiGong
  

Quidditch

• Quidditch

Quilling

• quilling
  
• papercraft
  

Quilting

• quilting
  
• modernquilts
  
• quiltingblockswap
  

Quizzes

• quiz
  
• quiz
  
• trivia
  

Race Car Driving

• racing

Race walking

• racewalking

Racquetball

• racquetball

Radio-controlled models

• radiocontrol

Rafting

• whitewater
  
• rafting
  

Rappelling

• rappelling

Rapping

• makinghiphop
  
• hiphop101
  

Reading

• books
  
• suggestmeabook
  
• ReadingGroup
  
• bookscirclejerk
  
• 52book
  
• kindle
  

Recipe creation

• recipes
  
• TheHighChef
  
• cookbooks
  
• Cooking
  

Record collecting

• vinyl
  
• hiphopvinyl
  
• heavyvinyl
  
• vinyljerk
  
• Vinyl_Jazz
  

Refinishing

• finishing

Reiki

• reiki
  
• energy_work
  

Renaissance fair

• renfaire

Renovating

• homerenovations
  
• AusRenovation
  
• Renovations
  
• HomeImprovement
  

Research

• research
  
• researchchemicals
  
• SampleSize
  

Reviewing Gadgets

• gadgets
  
• Futurology
  

Robotics & Robot Competitions

• robotics
  
• shittyrobots
  
• FRC
  
• battlebots
  
• FTC
  

Rock balancing

• RockBalancing

Rock climbing

• RockClimbing
  
• climbharder
  
• climbing
  
• climbergirls
  
• ClimbingPorn
  

Rock painting

• rockpainting

Rock Collecting

• rockhounds
  
• RockhoundExchange
  
• RockTumbling
  
• whatsthisrock
  

Role-playing games

• rpg
  
• RPGdesign
  
• rpg_gamers
  
• DnD
  

Roller derby

• rollerderby
  
• RollerDerbyReddit
  

Roller skating

• Rollerskating
  
• rollerblading
  
• ItsMySkateNight
  
• rollerskate
  

Rubik's Cube

• Rubiks_Cubes
  
• Cubers
  

Rugby

• rugbyunion
  
• RugbyTraining
  
• USArugby
  
• RugbyAustralia
  
• CanadaRugby
  
• springboks
  
• superleague
  

Rughooking

• rughooking

Running

• running
  
• AdvancedRunning
  
• runninglifestyle
  
• BeginnersRunning
  
• RunningShoeGeeks
  
• trailrunning
  
• XXRunning
  
• C25K
  

Safari

• SafariLive

Sailing

• sailing
  
• SailboatCruising
  
• Tallships
  
• boatporn
  
• sailingcrew
  

Sand art

• SandArt

Scouting

• scouting

Scrapbooking

• scrapbooking

Scuba Diving

• diving
  
• scuba
  
• scubaGear
  
• scubadiving
  
• freediving
  

Sculling or rowing

• Rowing

Sculpting

• sculpting
  
• miniaturesculpting
  
• Sculpture
  

Scutelliphily
Sea glass collecting

• seaglass

Seashell collecting

• Shelling

Sewing

• sewing
  
• SewingForBeginners
  
• freepatterns
  
• vintagesewing
  
• sewhelp
  
• SewingTips
  
• sewingpatterns
  
• SewingMachinePorn
  
• HandSew
  
• SewingStations
  

Shoemaking

• shoemaking
  
• Cordwaining
  

Shogi

• shogi

Shooting

• Shooting

Shortwave listening

• shortwave
  
• SWL
  

Shuffleboard

• shuffleboard

Singing

• singing
  
• SingingTips
  
• ratemysinging
  
• redditsings
  

Skateboarding

• skateboarding
  
• NewSkaters
  
• OldSkaters
  
• skateboardhelp
  
• classicskateboarding
  
• ElectricSkateboarding
  

Sketching

• Sketching
  
• SketchingPrompts
  

Skiing

• skiing
  
• Skigear
  
• xcountryskiing
  
• Skijumping
  
• ski
  

Skimboarding

• skimboarding

Skipping rope

• jumprope

Skydiving

• SkyDiving

Slacklining

• Slackline
  
• slacklining
  

Sled dog racing

• Dogsledding

Sledding

• Sledding

Slot cars

• slotcars

Snorkeling

• snorkeling

Snowboarding

• snowboarding
  
• snowboardingnoobs
  
• ShredditGirls
  

Snowmobiling

• snowmobiling

Snowshoeing

• snowshoeing

Soapmaking

• soapmaking

Soccer

• soccer
  
• bootroom
  
• WomensSoccer
  
• CanadaSoccer
  
• NWSL
  
• soccercirclejerk
  

Softball

• Softball
  
• CollegeSoftball
  

Spearfishing

• Spearfishing

Speed skating

• Speedskating

Sport stacking

• sportstacking

Sports memorabilia

• SportsMemorabilia

Spreadsheets

• spreadsheet
  
• excel
  

Squash

• squash

Stamp collecting

• stampcollecting
  
• stamps
  
• philately
  

Stand-up comedy

• StandUpComedy
  
• Standup
  

Stone skipping
Storm chasing

• stormchasing
  
• tornado
  

Story writing

• writing
  
• writingadvice
  
• WritingPrompts
  
• KeepWriting
  
• StoryWriting
  
• fantasywriters
  
• writers
  
• WritingHub
  
• WritingResources
  
• writinghelp
  
• writingopportunities
  
• writingcontests
  
• writingcritiques
  
• WritingStyle
  
• writingprompt
  
• writing_gigs
  

Storytelling

• Storytelling

Stretching

• Stretching
  
• flexibility
  

Sudoku

• sudoku

Sun bathing
Surfing

• BeginnerSurfers
  
• surfing
  

Survivalism

• Survival
  
• preppers
  
• Survivalist
  
• survivalism
  
• UrbanSurvivalism
  
• WildernessBackpacking
  

Swimming

• Swimming
  
• OpenWaterSwimming
  

Table tennis

• tabletennis

Taekwondo

• taekwondo

Tai chi

• taichi
  
• taijiquan
  

Taoism

• taoism

Tapestry

• Tapestry

Tarot

• tarot

*tarotpractice

• Tarotpractices
  
• tarotreadings
  
• TarotReading
  
• TarotDecks
  
• Tarots
  
• SecularTarot
  
• TarotCards
  

Tattooing

• tattoo
  
• tattoos
  
• TattooDesigns
  
• shittytattoos
  
• Best_tattoos
  
• DrawMyTattoo
  
• traditionaltattoos
  
• TattooArt
  
• TattooApprentice
  
• nerdtattoos
  
• tattooscratchers
  
• badtattoos
  
• tattooadvice
  
• sticknpokes
  
• TattooRemoval
  
• TattooVideos
  
• TattooArtists
  
• tattooflash
  
• tattoocomparisons
  
• tattooing
  
• TattooIdeasDesigns
  
• Tattoocoverups
  

Taxidermy

• Taxidermy
  
• badtaxidermy
  
• vultureculture
  
• TaxidermyisMetal
  

Tea bag collecting

• tea
  
• TeaPorn (Safe For Work)
  
• RateMyTea
  
• teaexchange
  
• teasales
  
• TeaPictures
  
• boba
  

Teaching

• teaching
  
• Teachers
  
• TeachingUK
  
• education
  
• StudentTeaching
  
• AustralianTeachers
  
• teachinginkorea
  
• teachinginjapan
  
• TEFL
  
• ScienceTeachers
  
• ELATeachers
  
• Internationalteachers
  
• MusicEd
  
• OnlineESLTeaching
  
• Professors
  

Tennis

• tennis
  
• GirlsTennis
  
• TennisCourtPorn
  
• 10s
  
• tabletennis
  

Terrariums

• terrariums
  
• bioactive
  
• ClosedTerrariums
  
• Terrarium
  
• Jarrariums
  
• Mossariums
  

Tether car
Thrifting

• thrifting
  
• ThriftStoreHauls
  

Thru-hiking

• Thruhiking
  
• AppalachianTrail
  
• PacificCrestTrail
  
• CDT
  
• NCTrails
  
• JMT
  

Ticket collecting

• ticketbrokers

Topiary

• topiary

Tour skating
Tourism (Editors Note: If you're looking to travel, visit the main country subreddit)

• tourism
  
• ThailandTourism
  
• irishtourism
  
• india_tourism
  
• travel
  
• JapanTravel
  
• TourismHell
  
• ItalyTourism
  
• IAmA_Tourism
  
• CostaRicaTravel
  
• GuiderTravel
  
• darktourism
  
• koreatravel
  
• braziltourism
  

Trade Fair

• TRADE
  
• mechmarket
  
• pokemontrades
  
• TakeaPlantLeaveaPlant
  
• hardwareswap
  
• snackexchange
  
• discexchange
  
• AdoptMeTrading
  
• comicswap
  
• Knife_Swap
  
• Pen_Swap
  
• AquaSwap
  
• makeupexchange
  
• Miniswap
  
• SteelbookSwap
  
• watch_swap
  
• KitSwap
  
• mangaswap
  

Trainspotting

• trains
  
• TrainPorn
  
• transit
  
• uktrains
  
• MelbourneTrains
  
• nycrail
  

Trapshooting

• TrapShooting

Travel

• travel
  
• solotravel
  
• TravelHacks
  
• TravelPorn
  
• travelpartners
  
• TravelNoPics
  
• Shoestring
  
• digitalnomad
  
• travelphotos
  
• travelblogging
  
• onebag
  
• travelbuddies
  
• travel_deals
  
• TravelMaps
  
• Travel_HD
  
• travelhacking
  
• travelblogs
  

Treasure Hunting

• TreasureHunting

Triathlon

• triathlon
  
• IronmanTriathlon
  

Ultimate frisbee

• ultimate

Unicycling

• unicycling

Upcycling

• upcycling

Urban exploration

• urbanexploration
  
• UrbanExploring
  
• Urbex
  

VR Gaming

• virtualreality
  
• VRGaming
  
• Vive
  
• vrfit
  
• VRphysics
  
• VRplugins
  

Vegetable farming

• vegetablegardening
  
• Veganic
  
• WormFarming
  

Vehicle restoration

• projectcar

Video editing

• VideoEditing
  
• editors
  
• VideoEditingRequests
  
• editing
  
• buildapcvideoediting
  
• videography
  

Video game collecting

• gamecollecting
  
• RetroGamePorn
  
• Shittygamecollecting
  
• VideoGameCollection
  

Video game developing

• gamedev
  
• GamePhysics
  
• IndieDev
  
• gameDevClassifieds
  
• indiegames
  
• INAT
  
• VideoGameDevelopers
  
• VideoGameEditing
  
• GameDevelopersOfIndia
  
• gamedevscreens
  

Videography
Vintage cars

• classiccars
  
• vintagejapaneseautos
  
• vintagecars
  

Vintage clothing

• VintageFashion
  
• VintageTees
  
• VintageClothing
  

Vinyl Records (see record collecting)

• vinyl

Voice Acting

• VoiceActing
  
• VoiceActingJobs
  
• RecordThisForFree
  

Volleyball

• volleyball
  
• VolleyballGirls
  
• volleyballtraining
  

Volunteering

• volunteer

Walking

• walking

Wargaming

• wargaming
  
• wargames
  
• computerwargames
  

Watch making

• watchmaking

Water polo
Water sports

• waterpolo

Wax sealing

• WaxSealers

Waxing/Grooming

• malegrooming

Weaving

• weaving

Weightlifting
Welding

• Welding
  
• Weldingporn
  
• WeldPorn
  
• BadWelding
  
• BadWelding
  

Whittling

• whittling
  
• wildwhittlers
  

Wine Tasting And Making

• wine
  
• winemaking
  

Witchcraft

• witchcraft
  
• realwitchcraft
  
• BabyWitch
  
• occult
  
• magick
  
• Witch
  
• Wicca
  
• apprenticewitches
  

Wood carving

• Woodcarving
  
• Spooncarving
  
• Carving
  

Woodworking

• BeginnerWoodWorking
  
• woodworking
  
• turning
  

Wrestling

• wrestling
  
• prowrestling
  
• Wreddit
  

Writing
(List Of 50+ via link) https://www.reddit.com//WritingPrompts/wiki/links
Yo-yoing

• Throwers

Yoga

• yoga
  
• YogaWorkouts
  
• YogaTeachers
  
• YogaChallenge
  

Zoo visiting

• zoos
  
• Zoo_Pics
  
• zoology
  
• AnimalPorn
  

Zumba

• zumba